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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2000-04-26, Page 5Q: And by whose death was it terminated?Disorder in the court Swallows go back to Capistrano. Bees return to the hive. Horses head for the corral. Idiots, it seems, wind up in court. The Halls of Justice must contain more stupidity per square centimeter than Jerry Lewis’s bicycle helmet. Consider some of the lawsuits now winding their tdrtuous way through various courtrooms on this continent. In Dallas, singer Kenny Rogers is being sued for throwing a Frisbee into the audience at a performance last fall. The Frisbee it seems, hit a chandelier, causing glass to fall and cut a New York accountant watching the show. The lawsuit alleges facial scarring as well as physical and mental suffering. The accountant’s wife adds that the incident robbed her husband of his sex drive. In Texas, a woman has filed a $1 million lawsuit against the folks who make the soft drink, Dr. Pepper. It seems the pop makers sponsored a college football punt-catching promotion. The woman got to stand on the 50- yard line and attempt to catch three punts from a kick-simulation machine. If she caught all three, she’d win $1 million. She didn’t catch any of them. But she cried ‘foul!”, saying the balls didn’t come down The new economy You may have heard reference made of something called the new economy, and depending on who was doing the telling, it could be anything from the best thing that ever happened to us to just another work of the devil. Nothing in the field of economics ever seems to be black and white; there are always so many shades of gray that you can be excused for wondering just how seriously you have to take it. Not surprisingly the expression is connected to the computer age and the use of software in just about every nook and cranny of our commercial activities. I can vouch for this influence. A few years ago I didn’t even own a computer; then I used it only within the confines of our office. We were able to store a lot of economic data which I could call up when required. It helped me prepare an exam and broke down the results into all kinds of statements which guided me in the future preparation of both exams and course content. Just before I went off to the Czech Republic I invested in a computer, a printer and a scanner and it was probably the best thing I could have done. It made my work much easier and I was able to use what the Czechs had to offer in doing my work over there. Since I came back, it has cut hours off the time required to do many of my tasks. I now have one in my office at the university as well as the one 1 bought. Both serve me very nicely and I often wonder what I would do without them. This is one of the key points of the new economy, it increases productivity and as a result the inflationary pressures are not nearly as great as the economy picks up steam. This is one thing that has surpassed many economists. Countries have been able to get the rate of unemployment down to levels considerably below that which formerly brought about inflation with the inevitable increases in interest rates. close enough to her. (They all landed within 25 feet of where she was standing). She reckons a settlement of oh, say, $1 million U.S. would go a long way to alleviating her mental anguish. And a three-time loser by the name of Kendall Breaux, has a little court action going on down in Thibodaux, Louisiana. Breaux isn’t actually in the courtroom. He’s serving a life sentence for drilling two bank tellers during a holdup. His lawsuit is directed against his getaway driver, who, Beaux says, caused him ‘unnecessary pain and suffering’ by crashing the car during the police chase away from the bank. Perhaps our courts of law are a natural destination for those among us who row through life with one oar out of the water. There’s a lot of boneheadedness there, even before loony litigants show up.Consider these outtakes from actual courtroom cross- examinations - and remember - these guys are practicing lawyers: Q: Mr. Slatery, you went on a rather elaborate honeymoon, didn’t you? A: I went to Europe, sir. Q: And you took your new wife? Q: How was your first marriage terminated? A: By death. By Raymond Canon Only now are we seeing some creeping inflation and (keep your fingers crossed) so far it does not appear to be too virulent. That, however, could change as the oil price increases work their way through the economy. It has been pointed out that increases in unemployment are a direct result of earlier rises in oil prices so keep an eye on that as well. Another part of the new economy has been the creation of a high tech stock index, called Nasdaq, which you now see nightly on the news, along with the traditional Dow Jones (in my opinion a very bad indicator) and the Toronto Composite 300 (a much better one). Everybody, well, at least a lot of people, got excited when the prices for computer and other high-tech stocks kept climbing as if there were no tomorrow but sooner or later the Nasdaq had to prove that it was human, i.e. the value of Letters to the editor are a forum for public opinion and comment. The views expressed do not necessarily reflect those of this publication. THE EDITOR, I am writing to ask for your help. In 1999 over 18,000 women were diagnosed with breast cancer in Canada and the incidence rate is not expected to change. During their lifetimes, one in nine women is expected to develop breast cancer and one in 25 will die from the disease. As you can imagine, the diagnosis of breast cancer causes a great deal of stress for these women and their loved ones. With support from Health Canada’s Canadian Breast Cancer Initiative a group of not-for-profit organizations that provide information and support have been working to get the right information at the right time to women diagnosed with breast cancer and the people who care about them. We surveyed and conducted focus groups Q: What is your date of birth? A: Aug. 30. Q: And what year would that be? A: That would be every year. Q: You understand that all your responses must be oral, sir? Now what high school did you attend? A: Oral. And my favourite. A tenacious pitbull of a lawyer is badgering a medical examiner, trying to prove his incompetence: Q: Doctor, before you conducted the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? A: No. Q: Did you check for blood pressure? A: No. Q: Did you check for any sign of respiration? A: No. Q: So, it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? A: No. Q: Really, doctor. How can you be so sure that the patient was not alive. A: Well, his brain was in a jar on my desk, but I suppose he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere. stocks had to take a tumble and sooner rather than later, that is precisely what it did. Where does all that leave us? Simply with the fact that the new economy does have some useful aspects but it should not be taken to mean that it will make such things as the business cycle and inflationary pressures obsolete as some would have you believe. Human nature is still human nature and greed and fear still have a role to play in any stock market function. Perhaps after a while some economists and business analysts will get tired of writing about the great possibilities of the new economy and all the wealth it is creating and concentrate once again on what makes the old one tick and how we can make it function that much more efficiently. There is still some validity in the old French proverb that the more things change, the more they remain the same. with women to determine what was needed. As a result the toll-free lines for information and support project group identified a collaborative approach to supporting their callers. To ensure that women are aware of the toll- free information and support lines available to them we have created a bookmark that lists both Canada-wide and provincial lines. We are promoting this free bookmark to women throughout Canada. You can help by making your readers aware of the services available to them or someone they know who might be struggling with breast cancer. Sincerely, Eleanor Nielsen Working Group Chairperson Senior Programs Consultant Canadian Cancer Society, National Office. THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, APRIL 26, 2000. PAGE 5. By Bonnie Gropp Morale massage In a world where we seem all too ready to point out the cracks, I have always maintained that just a little positive filler will go a long way. Unfortunately, it just doesn’t seem to happen with the spontaneity it should. Granted there are occasions when we can’t help but notice someone’s nice new sweater, or presented with a child’s interesting artwork, issue forth the requisite, albeit overdone, adulation. But how many times have we thought someone did a good job, but didn’t go out of our way to tell them? How often have we thought what a nice person someone is, but wouldn’t dream of just walking up to them and saying so? How often has someone gone beyond the call of duty, but we don’t take the necessary steps to see that the right people find out ? What a nice place it would be if we all said the pleasant thoughts we had. Although we might be surprised by the reactions of some recipients. Ironically, while society as a whole isn’t very good about being complimentary, many times we’re pretty bad at accepting praise as well. For some, a bit of flattery can even be embarrassing. It is probably a rather sad symptom of our unhealthy attitudes that most are made awkward by flattery. Criticism we take, either defending or correcting the problem. Respect on the other hand leaves us flummoxed, lost for words, mildly discomforted. We are puzzled, amused, even suspicious. I received a compliment the other day. It came from totally out of the blue, delivered in non-gushing terms, yet with sincerity. It touched me enough that 1 got just a tad teary.- In other words it was a perfect compliment, the kind we’d all like to get and few can receive graciously. Sorry to say, I am not one of them. I’m not sure anyone has said anything kinder to me than this woman did. But rather than some classy acknowledgement and acceptance, I blustered and blundered my thanks, prattled on like an idiot, all the while looking surprised that she should think such a thing, then left. It was only later that I saw myself as I should have been, smiling decorously, saying how much more the compliment meant having been said by her. Because you see she is a person worthy of compliment. There is so much about her that I admire, yet have never told her, nor to my chagrin, would probably ever have thought of doing. The thing is, the primary quality she possesses is that she is one of those people who would. In addition to her always sunny, positive manner, her ready words of support for people, her take charge attitude, she is that admirable type of person who has the right words for everyone and makes sure she delivers them. She seldom misses the opportunity to let someone know she noticed. And I am certain she is also the type of person who would take this compliment with the grace I seem incapable of mustering. In short, this woman is an example of the way I would like to be. That she saw and admired one quality in me was a morale massage. There are people who have it figured out; we’re all here together. Pointing out the flaws isn’t helping anyone, but telling them you noticed the good stuff is a nice thing to do for someone.