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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2000-01-05, Page 5What’s in a ‘nym? Want to know one of my favourite words in the English language? Eponym. Well, it's not really a favourite word — I hardly ever use it — what I love is what it means. Eponymn. I a person, (real or imaginary) after whom a discovery, invention or place is named, or thought to be named. Thus, the leotard — a pair of gossamer-thin tights that tend to look decidedly better on some folks than on others. We owe their existence to a French chap named Jacques Leotard. Sandwich. Named after the Earl of Sandwich, an English upper-class degenerate who loved gambling so much he couldn’t even stop to eat. While bidding on cards he would command his minions to throw some meat between two slabs of bread — unwittingly inventing the ‘sandwich’. The grisly device known as the Guillotine takes its name from Monsieur Jean Guillotm, a French physician who recommended it as a ‘humane’ method of dispatching criminals to the next world ‘way back in 1789. When you think of it, eponyms are all around us. You drive a Ford? Thank Henry Ford. A Pontiac? You're commemorating a famous Indian chief of the Odawas who led an uprising against the British back in the late 1700s. felInternational Scene Water, water everywhere For some time the Americans have been looking longingly at all our water and have been making efforts to get some of it for their own use. In fact, an American company, Sun Beit has started a $300 million suit against our federal government because of an agreement to ship water south of the border, an agreement that was later terminated until a study of water export policy had been completed. I do not intend, in this article, to examine the merits of this case, although I will say that I, along with -a 'lot . of other economists who specialize in trade policy are awaiting anxiously to see the outcome of it all. What I would like to do is give you some background material so that you can make a more rational decision on your own about the merits of selling off our water. It is true that we do have a lot of fresh water but not nearly as much as has frequently been claimed. Most of the water in our Great Lakes is what is called fossil water, accumulated by the melting of the glaciers at the end of the last Ice Age. Only about one per cent is renewable runoff which puts a totally different light on the subject. What bothers me more than anything else is that the Americans, who are so anxious to get great quantities of our water, have plenty of their own. They are not yet willing to live within their means. Olds, Chrysler, Mercedes and Benz — all eponyms. Like boycott, nicotine and bloomers. Plus more than a few I’ll bet you didn't know. The name Britain is derived from a legendary Roman character named Brutus. Similarly, a fictitious chap by the name of Italus gave us Italy. Europa? The history books tell us she was the beautiful daughter of the king of Tyre and the apple of the eye of that mythological Mafioso, Zeus. Europa eventually succumbed to the courtship (rape, actually) of Zeus, little knowing she would one day give her name to the amalgam of Common Market nations we know today as Europe. The breathtaking corset? That was invented by Etienne Corset, a French tailor determined to make his clients look slimmer — at the expense of normal respiration, if necessary. Haversack? A German mail carrier came up with that term for a pouch he-sewed together that made his daily rounds a little less burdensome. His name? Emil. Haversack. And there’s Adolphe Saxe who gave us the saxophone and Hereward Bugle who gave us the — guess what? And Argentinean botanist Jorge Avocado and Portuguese chef Joao Marmalado and Sir George Curry... a British officah in Injah back in the 19th century don’t you know, who, try as he might, simply couldn’t shake his passion for highly spiced dishes. Like ‘Curried’ rice, for instance. For example, while the world average for irrigation is about 66 per cent of the accessible amount, in California no less than 80 to 85 per cent goes for such a purpose. Much of this is used not to grow food but to cultivate cotton for government subsidy. If they were to reduce this amount to the world average (66 per cent), they would have no problem supplying their large cities with adequate water. More than once the Israelis, who have water problems of their own, have expressed themselves as appalled at the wastage in California. This is not to say that California is the only guilty state. Closer to home, New England has plenty of water to meet its own needs but in some urban systems, there is more water that leaks out of the system than is eventually used. New Englanders, like everybody else, look on abundant supply of water as a right, not as a commodity that has to be paid for somehow. To show how ridiculous the situation can become, the U.S. government provides subsidized water to some parts of the southwest for as little as $ 10 per acre-foot (one acre of water to a depth of one foot or approximately 325 gallons). It costs about $100 to capture and deliver the same amount of water. I— ~~1 A Final Thought Mistakes are stepping stones to success. - Charles E. Popplestone There’s plenty of eponymous potential around when you look for it— and lots to come, I like to think. Recently the TV program Law and Order caught some flack for having one of its detectives refer to a John as ‘getting a Lewinsky’. Blasphemy? Nonsense. Merely eponymization in action. Think of the possibilities. Clintonizing. The ability to talk out of both sides of your mouth and sound sensible to both parties.% Chretienizing. The ability to talk out of one side of your mouth and make no sense — in two official languages, Saddamnation. The art of winning a discussion by shooting your opponent in the forehead. Clarking: To behave in a manner that belies your background. E.G.: Becoming Superman when you’re really Clark Kent. Or becoming the leader of a wannabe national political party when you’re really a geek from cattle country. The possibilities are endless. To shriek loudly and incoherently? That would be Copping a Sheila. To return from the dead? Pulling a Vander Zalm. To save money by closing down services and booting people out of their jobs? Maximum Harrisment. To end a newspaper column because you’ve run out of space? Fading to Black. Guess who pays? The taxpayers, of course! All this is well and good but Americans can justifiably point out that Canadians are not exactly rushing to conserve their country’s water. They are quite right! Canada and the U.S. are by far the largest users of water per capita. Americans consume, on average, 5150 litres of water per day, and Canadians are not far behind with 4383 litres. Italy, the next country on the list, comes in with just over half that amount while Great Britain only uses one-ninth of our amount. Perhaps North America should stop arguing over who is going to get what amount of water and start deciding how it can be conserved or at least delivered at something closer to the true price of the commodity. As one observer has pointed out, we suffer, not from a lack of water, but of intelligence on the matter. Letters Policy The Citizen welcomes letters to the editor. Letters must be signed and should include a daytime telephone number for the purpose of verification only. Letters that are not signed will not be printed. Submissions may be edited for length, clarity and content, using fair comment as our guideline. The Citizen reserves the right to refuse any letter on the basis of unfair bias, prejudice or inaccurate information. As well, letters can only be printed as space allows. Please keep your letters brief and concise. THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 5, 2000. PAGE 5. The Short of it By Bonnie Gropp Being our best And so Y2K arrived, rather anti- climactically, despite its over-hyped build-up and in spite of the fireworks and fanfare heralding its happening. With little fuss, armageddon dawned under an optimistic cover of sunshine and blue skies denouncing any potential for doom and gloom. A non-event for the new year, the new century, our new beginnings... ... our New Year's resolutions. I don’t know if it was fatalism or cynicism that eliminated any self-improvement planning on my part, but I hadn’t given much thought to my annual promise for promoting and encouraging a better me. Perhaps, I pondered, it would be a complete waste of my precious time to be looking at faults if there wasn’t going to be a tomorrow? But more honestly, I questioned why I continue to make promises I know I’ll never keep. After all, despite our best intentions the average New Year’s resolution is broken faster than Harris’s campaign pledges. I know historically even when I have succeeded, when I have dropped those extra pounds, given up that vice or found a cause to champion, sooner or later, though usually sooner, I’m back where I started. So it was that this year, as 1 toyed with the idea of maintaining the status quo, I found myself at the proverbial wire with little interest in making a resolution. It was down to the crunch and I realized I had given no thought to what change I should make, what fresh outlook I could bring to the old me. Then one day, while driving, some contemplations on this subject were further distracted by the less than pleasing sounds emanating from my radio. My frustration as I switched stations soon turned to bemusement, however, as I began to see an analogy to life in my frenetic attempts to find perfection. My random punching of buttons, I realized, brought much the same results as the dawning of each new day. Sometimes there was a special treat, sometimes it was just plain garbage. Sometimes I got all I wanted, sometimes only part. Sometimes I missed out completely, sometimes patience was rewarded. There were few certainties, but if I took the time to consider, also wondrous variety. Such is life. Amidst that great old classic rock, you know you’re going to get some Barry Manilow. As this brief cerebral foray turned its way back to my previous musings I began to wonder if life is the reason that resolutions are so difficult to keep. We are seldom on the same wavelength as others. We dance to different tunes, our styles changing as they do. Our moods, our maturation, our priorities, our lifestyles continually alter our expectations. And we never know what’s coming next. Considering this possibility took a little pressure off me. We all know as we head off into the new century, it is a time to consider fresh starts. But just as we don’t know what we’ll hear next on the radio, neither do we know what is in store for us with each new passing second. The best we can ask of ourselves is to be the best we can under the circumstances.