Loading...
HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2002-11-06, Page 5THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 6, 2002. PAGE 5. Other Views S leep is the most moronic fraternity in the world, with the heaviest dues and the crudest rituals. - Vladimir Nabokov Methinks the author of Lolita doth protest too much. That sounds like something that might have been scribbled down in the early hours of some sleepless night by a grumpy insomniac fed up with counting sheep. Still, he does have a point. Just imagine what a Type A personality could get done if said personality didn't have to render itself unconscious for one third of its lifetime. Assuming that you, like I, hit the sack for about eight hours a night, and assuming that we both make it to our allotted three score and 10 - that means that you and I will have spent close to a quarter of a century curled up and comatose in the Land of Nod. Some folks have tried to stuff sleep on the back burner. Napoleon, Edison, Churchill and George Bernard Shaw all got by on less than five hours sleep a night (or so they claimed). Benjamin Franklin swore he slept only two. Einstein on the other hand, liked to rack up 10 hours in the sack each night - 11, if he had a major cogitation day coming up. So how much sleep do we need? The jury is still out. Edison growled, "People eat twice too much and sleep twice too long." But Paul Martin (not him - the one who wrote the book Counting Sheep) says, "We might live longer and happier lives if we took our beds as seriously as our running shoes." One thing that most experts agree on is that we are all getting less sleep than we used to. Ontario's Progressive Conservatives have a zero tolerance policy toward those who break the law, but they are ready to bend it to win an election. Premier Ernie Eves in a burst of compassion has chosen Jaime Watt, an advertising executive praised as a media guru and the party's most astute communications strategist, as co-chair of his campaign in the election due next year. Watt specializes in making opponents look bad and won his reputation working for former premier Mike Harris in the 1995 election, when he created a commercial showing a likeness of Liberal leader Lyn McLeod on a weathervane, twisting and turning with each puff of wind and suggesting accurately the Liberals were indecisive. This left out, however, that Harris was not always pointed in the right direction, because he made promises, including one to stop government constantly increasing its revenue from gambling,which he dropped like a losing lottery ticket the moment the election was over. Harris planned to install Watt as communications adviser in his office, but a victim phoned revealing Watt had been convicted of fraud and forgery while owning a clothing store a decade earlier and Harris withdrew his offer. The much-in-demand Watt turned up a few months later working on a contract for Eves, 41en finance minister, selling his economic statement, but the opposition parties, raised such an outcry he was cast out again. Watt still helped behind the scenes in the 1999 election and ran Jim Flaherty's recent campaign for leader and, while no-one had a real chance against Eves, injected the most excitement with his feisty claim Eves was a. pale pink imitation of Liberal leader Dalton • • Blame television, electric lights, internet surfing, Starbucks or just the sheer hyped-up pace of modern life - whatever the cause, there are a lot of folks walking around with unclaimed luggage under their eyeballs. _ And when it comes to the phenomenon of sleep, that may be just about all we can agree on. Most of our notions about sleep are erroneous. People talk of 'sleeping the night through'. In fact, we get four or five 'sleeps' of about 90 minutes each. People who claim they never dream are wrong. They just don't remember them. And we talk of 'sweet dreams'. In fact, about two-thirds of our dreams are unpleasant. Scientists aren't even precisely sure why we need to curl up and pass out once a day. Some argue we sleep to restore the body. Others say we do it to conserve energy. Certain researchers claim the function of sleep is to allow the brain to process the day's experiences and file them away in the memory banks - to help us remember, in other words. Other researchers say the opposite: that sleep is like your computer off-switch. It prevents the brain from becoming Over-loaded. As to how much sleep we need - that, too is an open question. Thd health guides Eric Dowd From Queen's Park McGuinty. Eves has shown how highly he rates Watt by forgiving and recruiting him, as an earlier Tory premier, William Davis, snapped up those who ran Al Lawrence's campaign and gave him a close race and fright. Eves risks opposition criticisms by appointing Watt. When his convictions were first revealed, the Liberals said they were shocked the Tories would "employ a convicted con artist to sell their message." The New Democrats questioned the Tories' integrity and said "everyone knows Watt is adept at selling people things they don't want." They can be expected to repeat these concerns as the Tories become more aggressive. The Tories already are circulating newsletters charging McGuinty is "still not up to the job," a continuation of their successful theme last election, and lists of Liberal changes of mind. The Tories will argue Watt, who was in his 20s when he broke the law, haS paid his penance and rehabilitated himself. But they have made it a major theme the opposition parties are soft on crime and have too much sympathy for those who commit offences and not enough for their victims. The Tories also have a zero tolerance policy toward welfare recipients MI6 defraud and ban them from benefits for life, although most are pitiable people who have not had Watt's recommend eight hours a night, but there's a 70-year-old- woman in England who claims she's never slept more than one hour a night - and no daytime naps either. Researchers hied her off to a sleep lab and monitored the woman for 72 hours straight. She stayed awake for the first 56 hours (nearly two and a half days) and then slept for only an hour and a half. The records show the woman awoke refreshed, alert and in good spirits. Well, why not? Sleep is not an absolute biological imperative. Albatrosses can fly for 30 to 50 days without resting. As far as we can tell, whales, antelopes, shrews and giraffes don't sleep at all. On the other hand, if you are of the hairless primate persuasion, it would be best if you don't try this at home. Going without sleep doesn't work very well for most humans. In fact, sleep deprivation is Dirty Trick-Number One in every interrogators' Little Black Book. Doctor Bernard Frankel, of the U.S. National Institute of Health says bluntly: "A human being can stay awake for no longer than 12 days without permanent damage." Besides, it feels good. Sam Coleridge wrote, "Oh, sleep! It is a gentle thing, beloved from pole to pole". And it's not as if it's a total waste of time. Fleming dreamed up penicillin while he was asleep. The laws of heredity came to Mendel in his sleep. Einstein discovered the germ of his. Law of Relativity during one of his ten-hour timeouts. And Mozart composed The Magic Flute with his eyes wide shut. The way I look at it, sleep is inevitable. So why not lie back and enjoy it? advantages in education and work opportunitiLs The Tories in addition are not spreading their forgiveness evenly, the prime example being Steve Gilchrist, who had been one of their brightest young prospects when he stepped down as municipal affairs minister in 1999 while police investigated an allegation he told developers who wanted to meet him to speak first to a Tory fundraiser. Police found no evidence of wrongdoing, but it emerged Gilchrist had been convicted of evading tax while involved, also in his 20s, in his family's business. Gilchrist may be the hardest-working MPP, commonly leaving his office at 3 a.m., yet others without his drive and ability have been appointed to cabinet. And while it is not enough of an excuse, if everyone who evaded tax Was caught, the courts would come to a standitill. But he has not been reinstated in party favour and neither have Alan Eagleson or Terry Jones or other former Tory MPPs who have been in trouble with the law, but they are not needed to win an election. Letters Policy The Citizen welcomes letters to the editor. Letters must be signed and should include a daytime telephone number for the purpose of verification only. Letters that are rot signed will not be printed. Submissions may be edited for length, clarity and content, using fair comment as our guideline. The Citizen reserre:, the right to refuse any letter on the basis of unfair bias, prejudice or inaccurate information. As well, letters can only be prirled as space allows. Please keep your letters brief and concise. Bonnie Gropp The short of it Boys and their toys B ig boys and their , toys. There is something about motorized vehicles and testosterone that seems to go together. I once read that society programs the male at an early age by putting 'guy' type toys in the hands of little boys. Studies suggest that a young male child is as likely to be entertained by dressing a baby doll as he is pushing a car along the floor if that is what he's been given. At the risk of upsetting feminists that all makes sense except for one thing. As most people with male children would attest, it's generally not true. A young mother, herself born into a family of girls, then raising daughters, eventually gave birth to a boy. I remarked upon how different this must be for her. "I know," she said. "I never told him to like tractors and trucks, noisy things. But from the time he could show interest he did. The girls never cared about that stuff." I know what she means. Boys like tools and motors. An early fascination of my oldest son's was a source of embarrassment for his young mom as every trucker who drove past us received an exuberant greeting. When he got a little older, I gave him a Raggedy Andy; he chose a John Deere combine. My grandson, who is very much surrounded by feminine influence, arrived for a visit at our home the other day with a doll. Oh, he played with it alright — throwing it on the back of his riding car and fishtailing around the house. Not yet three his fascination with wheels and motors began with lawn mowers and has progressed to where he already has his favourites when it comes to automobiles. He actually recognizes a variety of makes and has a fondness, albeif nurtured by his Papa, for one particular model, the, PT Cruiser. With that • .in mind, his indulgent grandparents were delighted to be able to give him a little treat recently. As a Christmas gift last year my husband received a one-day rental of a Cruiser. There was no way our Peanut couldn't be included in this, outing so we set the date and made our plans, all to be kept quiet until picking up the car. Spying the Cruiser was a treat in itself but finding out he was actually going to spend the day riding around in it generated plenty of excitement. Autos are certainly one Of the things that do seem to have that effect on guys. Men will yearn for a specific type. Even more curious, they're interested in what lies beneath both hood and chassis. My husband has for quite some time been in the process of restoring a classic, a 1967 RT. A blast from his past, it's nostalgia, hobby and a dream for sound and speed rolled into one. And conversation for every male who crosses our threshold. Guys remember their first set of wheels with the same wistful expression a woman wears recalling her wedding day or the birth of her child. Even my brother, whom I've always thought of as more of a tool guy than a car guy, got dreamy- eyed when someone mentioned a 1968 Cheve I le. I have spent a lot of hours trying to understand why metal, rubber, plugs and engines can inspire such admiration in males, almost even before they can walk. I have come to the decision that it is just one more piece of the puzzle that is men and women. Now I lay me . Tories bend zero tolerance policy