HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2002-09-11, Page 5Final Thought
Some people drink from the fountain of
knowledge. Other just gargle.
4ativt . — Unknown
THE CITIZEN. WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 11, 2002. PAGE 5
Other Views
Manners will maketh the man
"If_ niceness were an Olympic sport.
Canadians would be perennial cha mpions, like
Kenyans in the marathon."
Robert Fulford
I
t's true: Canadians - providing you don't
count hockey arenas and Normandy
beaches - are just about the meekest folks
on the planet.
If you don't believe that, just ask one of us.
In fact, one of the easiest ways to tell a
Canadian from an American is to step on his
toe. If the guy tells you that he's sorry, you've
just trod on a Canadian.
Americans, of course are world-renowned
for their - well, they would call it frankness.
The rest of the world views it as rudeness.
The Ugly American is not just an old movie
title. It's a sociological cliché recognized from
Copenhagen to Canberra. .
Not to mention from Seattle to Sarasota -
even Americans acknowledge that they're rude
- and getting ruder.
A recent national survey by a research group
called Public Agenda showed that 79 per cent
of Americans polled believe a lack of courtesy
and respect in that country is a serious
problem. Sixty-one per cent of them believe
the problem has worsened in recent years.
Well, maybe.
But politeness can be overdone too. Take the
situation in Japan, where one of the fastest
growing niche industries is a service called
,Wakaresaseya. That translates literally as
`breaker-upper' - and that's just what these
folks do — they break up sticky relationships. A
wakaresaseya company employs agents who,
for a price will dump your girlfriend, get rid of
your husband or fire that longtime employee
for you.
Why can't the Japanese individuals do their
Ernie Eves's defeated chief rival for
premier, who vanished as abruptly as if
he had been taken for a ride by the
Mafia- and fitted with concrete overshoes, has
suddenly shown he is still alive.
Jim Flaherty was the province's second most
important politician, deputy premier and
finance minister with a finger in every
ministry, when he ran against Eves for
Progressive Conservative leader arid premier.
But Flaherty committed several
unpardonable sins. He_called Eves a pale, pink
imitation of a Liberal, which he has turned out
to be, and for more privatization, including
selling TVOntario, of which Eves's
companion, Isabel Bassett, is chair, and
forcing the homeless off the streets, while Eves
was intent on moving the Tories toward the
more fashionable centre.
Flaherty also showed himself the party's
most exciting speaker and the darling of its
right wing, which hangs on like a barnacle, and
Eves immediately exiled him to Ontario's
equivalent of Siberia.
Eves had enough policy differences with
Flaherty that he could not leave him in his old
posts with the possibility sometime they might
disagree publicly.
.The new premier also did not want to leave
the only threat to him in the party in a position
in the public eye where he could build an even
stronger base, as. Jean Chretien did with Paul
Martin.
So Eves made Flaherty Minister of
Enterprise, Opportunity and Innovation, a
portfolio he dreamed up which includes the
former economic development, trade and
industry ministry and -responsibilities for
promoting science and technology.
It sounds an important job and could be one,
Arthur
Black
own dirty work? Because in Japanese culture,
politeness is paramount. The Japanese find it
exceedingly difficult to just say 'no'.
Far easier to hire a wakaresaseya hitman (or
woman) to do the job for a fee.
In Korea, the problem isn't getting out of
unwanted relationships, it's getting into
wanted ones. It is an unwritten but universally
observed rule of public behavioui in South
Korean society to shun voluntary contact with
strangers.
It's a tenet of decorum that makes for a lot of
lonely Saturday nights, but it helps explain
why, in Seoul there are currently eight
"booking clubs" in which single men and
Women pay waiters to forcibly introduce them
to each other. For a few hundred bucks, a
waiter will take the client by the elbow and
physically steer him or her to the table of their
choice, then do the honours - "Kim, this is Lee;
Lee, meet Kim - now what'll yez have?"
There's turmoil in Thailand over politeness
too. The Thais place a high premium on civil
behaviour and public harmony.
Right now that's being shredded by probably
the most ill-mannered electronic export the
West has ever foisted on the rest of the world -
the.TV show called The Weakest Link, wherein
a sadistic and overbearing hostess browbeats
and humiliates contestants who fail to answeF
questions correctly.
but ministers of economic development have
never ranked high in the pecking order.
Decisions of great economic importance are
usually made and announced by the premier or
finance minister. Economic development
ministers have few opportunities to make
statements or answer questions and obtain the
publicity that is a politician's lifeblood.
Recent holders of the office include Tory
Bill Saunderson, New Democrat Alan Pilkey
and Liberal Hugh O'Neil, who would not be
recognized once they stepped outside their
front doors.
Flaherty has had to resort to prompting Tory
backbenchers to ask him questions to get even
a few minor openings on TV. He vanished
almost as surely as if he had been designated a
non-person under a Communist regime or put
in charge of the province's operations in
Moosonee.
Flaherty has re-emerged briefly, but ,not
because of anything connected with his
obscure ministry. He gatecrashed a conference
of federal Tories and urged them to renew
efforts to unite with the further-right Canadian
Alliance and said if they did, Eves's
predecessor as premier, Mike Harris, might run
for leader.
Flaherty also hinted if Harris could not be
coaxed he might run flOr federal leader himself
There are versions of The Weakest Link
playing in 70 different countries, mostly to
enthusiastic audiences.
Not so in Thailand. The Thai version of the
show has shocked the populace and provoked
a huge uproar.
Why? Because it's too rude.
The government-sponsored National Youth
Bureau went so far as to write an official letter
of protest to the company which produces the
show complaining that "the show is promoting
fierce competition and selfishness among
participants. This contravenes Thai
generosity."
Even the prime minister, Thaksin Shinawatra
was moved to comment, "I felt rather stressed
out after watching the show."
Somehow, I don't think Thhiland is ready for
Coaches Corner with Don Cherry.
Ah, well, rudeness wasn't invented
yesterday. And it doesn't just thrive in TV
studios or New York taxis.
Human beings have always been convinced
that civilized behaviour was going to hell in a
handbasket and we've usually placed the
blame squarely on the shoulders of the next
generation.
Like the grump who said: "The children now
love luxury, they have bad manners, contempt
for authority, they show disrespect for their
elders and love chatter in place of exercise.
They no longer rise when elders enter the
room. They contradict their parents, chatter
before company, gobble up dainties at the
table, cross their legs, and tyrannize over their
teachers."
Who said that - Ann Landers? Stockwell
Day? A Globe and Mail editorial?
Nope. Socrates.
About 2.500 years ago.
and he' would be a serious candidate on his
performance campaigning and on the
convention platform, although still too far right
for many traditional Tories.
Winners of leadership races pushing their
closest rivals into obscure posts is nothing new.
Chretien must wish he could have done this
with Martin, who always had too big a
following to be relegated to the backwoods.
The best-known Ontario example was by
Tory premier William Davis in the I970s.
Davis beat Allan Lawrence, a junior minister
who came out of nowhere, by only 44 votes
out of 1,536.
Davis was obliged to give a prominent post
in his cabinet to Lawrence, who had his
strength in the party's grassroots while Davis's
was in the establishment.
At first he did, by making Lawrence attorney
general, traditionally , a heavyweight post
constantly in the public eye. •
But Davis within a year switched Lawrence
to secretary for justice, a new post that would
supposedly initiate and develop policy in all
-ministries in the justice field, including
attorney and solicitor general, consumer
relations and corrections.
It sounded a worthwhile job, but ministers in
the traditional ministries were reluctant to
surrender their ability to make policies and
Lawrence, left in obscurity, quickly gave it up
for a career in federal politics and it could
happen to Flaherty.
Bonnie
Gropp
The short of tit
<14, VImp.
Before it's too late
011c year ago today we were reminded,
in a harshly brutal way, how foolith it
is to take anything for granted — that
each evening would bring a new day, that we
are immune to tragedy, that we would always
have another chance.
As the seconds, minutes. hours unfolded on
9/I I this became a lesson for all of us. .
And in the days, weeks, months that have
passed since, we would probably have to admit
that there are times when it would seem we
didn't really learn the lesson very well.
When we heard the heart-wrenching stories
we hugged our spouses and children and
vowed to do better at showing them our love.
We spoke of treating each day as if it were our
last. We promised to be more compassionate,
more gentle, More understanding of others.
But these are tall orders to fill and memories
are short, . .
I don't know if it's just society today in
general, or my imagination, but .1 blame a
somewhat narcissistic style of living on our
inability to focus on the important things. We
fuss about our jobs. our lack of a job. handling
our finances and not having any finances. ,
•. As well, there is an aura of poor me
shrouding so many. Why did this have to
happen to me? Why should I have to go
through this? Why do I have to. work late, do
everything, be everywhere?
While we may not necessarily believe thy
world and everyone on it owes us. we're stili
sure to look out for number one. Quality time.
my time. Bored with a job? Quit. Tired of a
marriage?, Walk.
I don't belieye in staying in a bad situation,
but I can't help wondering sometimes if it's
just become a little foe easy to lease.
Babyboomers need only look back one
generati,in to see that - “)mmitment meant
much ;ilore.
i recently attended the funeral of a man in
his 80s. A good life, not an easy life, but one
for him that had all he needed. Rich in family.
able to make a living, he had what we are all
supposed to need.
, Wilco he became ill., his ,Wife of 61 years
gave uncomplainingly to try and make him
comfortable. He mentioned often about
moving him to a place A here the extended care
he needed could be handled by someone else
to take the pressure from her. He would go
willingly, she would not let him. Explaining
this to people he would simply say that if he
moved into a home Ma would be all alone.
While his prolonged illness caused her to
perhaps give more than she had, it was done
with a love and loyalty that warms me. It was
not why me. but why him, and for better, for
worse, she cared -for him because she had
loved him a lifetime.
And I doubt that a day went by during which
either of them doubted that in their minds or
their hearts.
Obviously, when we are given rotten
lemons, we can't make lemonade. Feeling bad
about- things is a. normal reaction to bad things
and we arc entitled to that feeling.
The test is to give equal time to life's
sweetness, It is also important that we not just
remember who matters most, but show that we
are both grateful for and , humbled by the
presence of them in ourlives.
And above all, make sure'every day. even on
the bad ones. we lind a way to let them know
it.
Eric
Dowd
From
Queen's Park
Flaherty speaks from Siberia