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The Citizen, 2001-11-28, Page 5THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 28, 2001. PAGE 5. Other Views A virus alert that makes sense Regular readers of this column will be aware that the writer is not a huge fan of the personal computer. Oh, I use one, alright — have for at least the last decade. I've gone toe to toe with Ms Dos and WordPerfect and Microsoft Word. I've wrestled, with Eudora and GroupWise and other murky programs the names of which mercifully escape me, but I've never been thrilled about it. In fact, I frequently entertain fantasies of ripping mine from its moorings and hauling it, wires and cables a-dangle, to the top of a cliff, then seeing how far I can shot-put the mother. There are many reasons for my hostility towards computers: those smirky, smart-ass messages that pop up unbidden on my screen; the infuriating - and inscrutable 'prompts' that irregularly blindside me: THIS PROGRAM HAS PERFORMED AN ILLEGAL OPERATION AND WILL BE SHUT DOWN. The plethora of passwords.that I must type in and update - folks, I don't work for CSIS. I don't have any secrets worth hiding. Just open the damned program! And the virus alerts. Every few days I go through the ritual of typing in my user name (which I invariably confuse with my password and vice versa) only to be greeted by a billboard advising me that, while I slept, all my files were 'inoculated' against new viruses. In order to carry on; I have to shut everything down and start over. And also, about three times a week, I get e- mails from strangers advising me of a "virus alert". These missives breathlessly inform me that there is a new cyberspatial contagion afoot - one that's infinitely cagier and nastier than anything seen before. About three days after receiving the alert I get another e-mail from the same source telling me to relax, that the whole virus scare was a We have heard countless times since Sept. 11 that we are living in a new world and that things will never be . the same. We have been forcibly reminded that there exist fanatics who do not like our civilization in general and the American version of it in particular and that the deliberate killing of innocent people is part of their campaign. Our reaction, or more specifically that of the American government, is considered to be the first war of the new century, the war against religious fanaticism, a war unlike any we have ever fought. In a sense no two wars are alike. In retrospect World War I was a conflict born out of stupidity. All the major nations in Europe were_ on a collision course and seemed incapable of stopping it before exhaustion set in. World War II was a more justifiable action in that nothing short of war seemed likely to stop the Nazi menace. You could, without too much difficulty, categorize each of the conflicts in which we have participated, and none would have the same characteristics. Put down one menace and one of a different kind rears its ugly head. No war occurs out of a vacuum. Studying. the causes of the various /conflicts is a growth industry among historians and there has been no lack of opinions how, much the United States .is to blame for the likes of Osama bin Laden. ' Of course blame can be allocated to both sides; no nation leads an impeccably clean life free from fault, especially if that nation is a superpoWer of the importance accorded the U.S. But if you walk the streets of Blyth or Brussels any given day or travel in the surrounding area, I doubt that you will see Arthur Black hoax. Now there's a real loser for you — some geek who sits around inventing MYTHICAL viruses. I dismissed the whole virus/hoax/new virus/new hoax phenomenon as farcical and meaningless. At least until I received the "Bad Times" alert. Folks, this one is obviously for real. I don't know who sent it to me, but I thank them - and I pass it on to you with the fervent hope that it isn't too late: "IF YOU RECEIVE AN E-MAIL ENTITLED 'BAD TIMES', DELETE IT IMMEDIATELY. DO NOT -OPEN IT. APPARENTLY THIS ONE IS PRETTY NASTY. IT WILL NOT ONLY ERASE EVERYTHING ON YOUR HARD DRIVE, BUT IT WILL ALSO DELETE ANYTHING ON DISKS WITHIN 20 FEET OF YOUR COMPUTER. IT DEMAGNETIZES THE STRIPES ON ALL OF YOUR CREDIT CARDS. IT REPROGRAMS YOUR ATM ACCESS CODE, SCREWS UP THE TRACKING. ON YOUR VCR AND USES SUBSPACE FIELD HARMONICS TO SCRATCH ANY CDs YOU ATTEMPT TO PLAY. IT WILL PROGRAM YOUR PHONE SPEED-DIAL TO CALL ONLY 900, NUMBERS. THIS VIRUS WILL MIX ANTIFREEZE. IN YOUR FISH TANK. IT WILL DRINK ALL YOUR BEER. much of a difference. Some residents will have cancelled their airline tickets, others will have perhaps made donations destined to New York but by and large life goes on. It did just that when the chief threat to our existence was atheistic Communism and a nuclear war could well dump nuclear radiation over all of southwestern Ontario, a threat that had all the potential for a horrendous disaster. Osama bin Laden and his followers have, in my mind, established goals that are impossible to achieve: they will, for example, not be happy until Israel no longer exists as a nation. In addition, he poses as much a threat to Saudi Arabia as he does to the United States. In this' respect I am reminded of the theories of the great English historian, Arnold Toynbee who said that all great societies are faced with a number of outside challenges; their response to such challenges is what determines their success as a society.- Since there are relatively few periods when we are not being challenged, life does, in fact, go on in pretty well the same pattern. What institutions in our society which are practiced in Watford as well as the country as a whole are worth maintaining and strengthening? What policies with regard to this latest external threat can we support? Osama bin Laden would like to disrupt our lives as much as possible, if only FOR GOD'S SAKE ARE YOU LISTENING? IT WILL LEAVE DIRTY UNDERWEAR ON THE COFFEE TABLE WHEN YOU ARE EXPECTING COMPANY. IT WILL REPLACE YOUR SHAMPOO WITH NAIR AND YOUR NAIR WITH ROGAINE, ALL THE WHILE DATING YOUR CURRENT BOY/GIRLFRIEND BEHIND YOUR BACK AND BILLING THEIR HOTEL RENDEZVOUS TO YOUR VISA CARD. IT .WILL CAUSE YOU TO RUN WITH SCISSORS AND THROW THINGS IN A WAY THAT IS FUN ONLY UNTIL SOMEONE LOSES AN EYE, IT WILL REWRITE YOUR BACKUP FILES, 'CHANGING ALL YOUR ACTIVE VERBS TO PASSIVE TENSE, AND INCORPORATING UNDETECTABLE MISSPELLINGS WHICH GROSSLY CHANGE THE INTERPRETATIONS OF KEY SENTENCES. IF THE 'BAD TIMES' MESSAGE IS OPENED IN A WINDOWS 95/98 ENVIRONMENT, IT WILL LEAVE THE TOILET SEAT UP AND YOUR HAIR DRYER PLUGGED IN DANGEROUSLY CLOSE TO A FULL BATHTUB. IT WILL NOT ONLY REMOVE THE 'FORBIDDEN' TAGS FROM YOUR MATTRESSES AND PILLOWS, IT WILL ALSO REFILL YOUR SKIM MILK WITH WHOLE MILK, WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN! AND IF YOU DON'T SEND THIS TO 5,000 PEOPLE IN THE NEXT 20 SECONDS YOU WILL FART SO HARD THAT YOUR RIGHT LEG WILL SPASM AND SHOOT STRAIGHT OUT IN FRONT OF YOU -DISLOCATING THE KNEE OF YOUR SPOUSE OR CO-WORKER." Finally. A virus alert that makes sense. to reveal to his satisfaction and to those of his adherents how shallow our society is; he is convinced that he has a superior ideology. The best way to counter this is to demonstrate its falseness. It is we who have superiority and we can go about our business even while we take steps to demonstrate our moral superiority. In short we emphasize the positive. Because of this life should and will go on pretty much as it has before. Letter THE EDITOR, B.C. Hydro has the third lowest hydro rate in North America. It is a government-owned monopoly which wisely did not invest in nuclear power. B.C. Hydro quietly adds about a billion dollars to the provincial coffers every year. When privatized hydro regions like Alberta and California had brown-outs because of lack of power, B.C. Hydro happily sold electricity to them for the very high rates commanded in those jurisdictions. Now B.C. Hydro is gleefully waiting for the market forces to .overcorrect by over-investing in electricity until the rates bottom out and B.C. Hydro can buy electricity from them for cheap rates. Meanwhile, the citizens of British Columbia continue to enjoy inexpensive, reliable electricity. Even the citizens of Ontario are presently paying a third of what our privatized American neighbours are paying. So tell me again why Ontario is privatizing electricity? Linda Easton Coderich, ON Putting myself to the test Nothing like spending some time with a cop to put things in perspective. The idea came to me recently' that at many social gatherings someone is always wondering if there's any way to tell, when it comes to-alcohol and driving, how much is too much. The easy answer, one would suppose, would be to simply abstain. But, let's face it, people who enjoy a drink now and then, would be much happier to learn exactly how many, if any, they might consume without being over the limit. Being one who likes a drink now and then, I decided to put myself to the test, by arranging an afternoon with OPP Sr. Const. Don Shropshall. The plan. was to drink, then submit to the breathalizer test. The former went fairly well, the latter not so much. To suggest that the day was enlightening was an understatement. It was simultaneously sobering and surprising. I'm not going to go into detail here, that's on another page of this newspaper, but I will tell you that it's unfortunate anyone who enjoys a drop of alcohol can't take this test. It's also unfortunate that even if they did•some would still not change their ways. Apparently, the greatest number of impaired drivers in Huron County would be people between the ages of 35-50. The reason according to an expert I spoke with is that unlike today's young people, the older generation has not been educated and old habits die hard. Driving drunk was, if not okay, then forgivable when they were younger so what could be the problem. They've done it for years without hurting anybody, so why worry. Well, I come from that generation and I admit people never thought about v •hether or not they should be driving. But are they entirely stupid? It's a different world out there and adults shouldn't need instruction to make them understand that. Trust me, I am well aware of my imperfections. I am certainly no saint and when it comes to mistakes I have made some doozies. But what I also am not is a risk taker. Why take the chance of getting caught — or worse. It's interesting how simple it seems to be to let denial work in our favour. The other day I was thinking about a friend who smokes in the presence of his non-smoking wife because it doesn't bother.her. It seems odd to me that just because she says it's okay this otherwise perfectly sensitive, intelligent man doesn't take it outside. After all, if a magic genie offered a potion that would make him feel good, but would slowly poison his wife, perhaps even lead to her death, he would refuse. This man would cut off his right arm before he would hurt her and yet, he refuses to see that smoking in her presence does just that. Why? Because it's what he's always done and so far it hasn't caused any problem. Chances like this I'm not willing to take . The idea that by having one too many can turn my car into a lethal weapon, or myself into a criminal, doesn't have odds good enough. And though I said earlier I wouldn't divulge any details of my 'breath-taking' experience here, I think-Me tidbit is worth repeating. The formula of one drink an hour is a myth. Don't believe me? Read my story. And if you still feel confident getting behind the wheel of a car after you've had a few drinks, I guess I didn't do my job. Because the only other explanation would be that you're a fool. How new is our new world?