The Citizen, 1998-08-19, Page 5International Scene
By Raymond Canon
THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 19, 1998. PAGE 5.
The doctor is in ...
sort of
Doctors and nurses are people who
give you medicine until you die.
Deborah Martin
Whenever I face the prospect of going to a
hospital, the gnarly, wizened visage of old
Leroy Philpott flashes before my eyes.
Leroy (names have been changed to protect
the guilty) was an ancient farmer who
worked a hundred-acre spread across the
road from where I grew up. He employed
work horses in place of a tractor, heated his
home by wood stove and never, ever went to
the hospital.
"Don't hold with hospitals" old Leroy
would growl. "Man could get hisself killed in
there."
Leroy had a point. A recent study
published in The Washington Post shows that
about 140,000 Americans die each year from
side effects of prescribed medication.
"This," points out the newspaper, "is many
times the estimated 10,000 who die annually
from drugs like cocaine and heroin."
Sobering thought. I think a lot of us
assume we are in the best of all possible
The Exchange Rate
Puzzle
Are you confused, worried or excited by
the daily drop in the value of the Canadian
dollar? If so, join the club that has millions of
members.
To make matters worse, there are all sorts
of experts out there, real and imaginary, who
are trying to enlighten us all, or else scare the
hell out of us. You can literally take your
pick. If you are of the apocalyptic school of
thought, I've got a few experts to cheer you
up. There is literally something for
everybody!
Let's take the doom-and-gloomsters first.
The main advocate of this school of thought
is Sherry Cooper, an economist with a large
investment firm in Toronto. She takes a
rather long-term view of the situation,
pointing out that, over the last decade, our
currency has depreciated 20 per cent in terms
of the U.S.-dollar and the British pound, and
15 per cent against the German mark. In
1998 the corresponding numbers are 4.4 per
cent and 5.2 per cent. In short she argues that
"we are buying our share in world markets
by cutting our prices (i.e. drop in the value of
our currency). Relying on this, rather than
productivity gains, has reduced our standard
of living."
I can take this even farther. When I arrived
hands the moment we surrender our ailing
carcasses to the care of professionals. That's
not always the case.
A recent review of medical records at
several major hospitals (American, not
Canadian records, I hasten to stress) --
uncovered these gems actually written on
patients' charts by certified health care
professionals -- including a doctor or two.
* Patient was alert and unresponsive.
* She is numb from her toes down.
Got a 'plumbing' problem? You might want
to consider prune juice before you commit
yourself to the tender mercies of medical
care:
* She stated that she had been constipated
for most of her life until 1989 when she got
a divorce.
* Rectal exam revealed a normal size
thyroid.
* Bleeding started in the rectal area and
continued all the way to Los Angeles.
* The patient was to have a bowel
resection. However, he took a job as a
stockbroker instead.
* Exam of genitalia was completely
negative except for the right foot.
* Exam of the genitalia reveals that he is
circus sized.
You also have to wonder just how much
attention the experts are paying when you
sign in:
in Canada in the 1950's, the exchange rate
for the Swiss franc was 4.4 to the dollar;
today it is .97. When I went to school in
Germany, the exchange rate was 4 DM to the
Canadian dollar, it is now 1.2. Ms Cooper,
therefore, does have a point and an important
one.
The more relaxed viewpoint, or that taken
by the Bank of Canada and the federal
government, is that the current drop is good
for business, especially in the fields of
exports and tourism. The Bank's mandate is
to care for the domestic economy and, with
this in mind, it should not interfere with the
money markets in the buying and selling of
the Canadian currency. If the reasons for the
latest drop are temporary ones, which they
appear to be, the best thing to do is carry out
a "hands-off policy". If we were to raise
interest rates to protect the dollar, we would,
in effect, cool off the economy at a time
when no cooling off is needed, with the
resulting loss of jobs, profits and the like. It
would, therefore, cut down on government
revenues when we are trying to reduce our
horrendous national debt. It is hard to argue
against this point of view, too.
Well, where do we go from here? Should
we be worried? The answer is both yes and
no. (Doesn't that just sound like an
economist?) In the short term it is probably
prudent to go along with the Bank and try not
to bring the prosperity stage of our economy
to a premature end. I would, therefore, argue
* Both breasts are equal and reactive to
light and accommodation.
* The patient lives at home with his
mother, father and pet turtle who is
presently enrolled in day care three times a
week.
* Coming from Detroit, this man has no
children.
Now, I know that these are the exceptions,
not the rule. I am fully aware that most
medical care is professional, competent and
reliable.
Nevertheless.
Nevertheless, I cannot help but remember
that good old Leroy Philpott, the man who
forswore doctors, hospitals and all that
modem medicine has to offer.
Good old-fashioned, behind-the-times, out
of it, not-in-step Leroy ...
Died from complications of one of his 13
cows kicking him in the head.
Leroy was 81 years old at the time of the
kicking.
He never saw a doctor up to and including
the Chief Hospital Admissions Officer who
decorated him with a toe tag reading DOA.
An old curmudgeon/philosopher by the
name of Ambrosia Birch once said:
Before undergoing any surgical operation
arrange your temporal affairs. You may live.
Something tells me that Leroy and
Ambrosia would have got along just fine.
against any hike in the interest rates at the
present time. The dollar may even go lower
before it turns around and starts back up. So
be it! If it means that your trip to the U.S. is
more expensive, or even too expensive, that's
tough! I'm heading out for Europe shortly
and I'm prepared for the higher prices in
western Europe.
However, and this is where I get back to
Ms Cooper and her arguments. We are
buying short-term gain with long-term pain.
If we want to stop the decline in our standard
of living, we are simply going to have to pull
up our socks and start becoming a more
efficient nation. i.e. improving our
productivity. Our government should make
every effort to encourage productivity gains
through the tax system. So far they have
done next to nothing and this productivity
has been lagging for years or should I say
decades.
Well, there it is. I hope it has clarified the
situation for you. Maybe you should explain
it to your MP. They seem as confused as
anybody but, if they are to represent us
adequately, they should be doing everything
they can to promote national efficiency.
A Final Thought
If you do not think about the future, you
can not have one.
John Galsworthy
A View
from My
Backyard
By Jamce Becker N,
Family time
As the season of hot, lazy days seems to
be quickly nearing an end, so too does the
summer holiday time for both students and
parents.
It is those few days or weeks during July
and August that both the young and old have
free time; a perfect opportunity for moms
and dads to enjoy time with the youngsters.
For my family, 12 days away from the
office enabled us to travel to an area often
considered remote and empty, yet it has
many hidden stories.
In some ways, it was more like venturing
to another country rather than just heading
north in our own province; roads ended,
distance dictated lifestyle, prices were high
and cell phones only arrived last year.
The 10-hour trek by car took us to
Cochrane, some 800 kilometres north of
Blyth. The jump-off point for the Polar Bear
Express, an adventure train excursion
heading towards James Bay, Cochrane has
an attraction which draws visitors from
across this country and around the world.
Boarding the train at 8:30 a.m. with a six-
year-old in tow was one experience which
less seasoned families might attack with
trepidation, however, my little man has
journeyed on extended car trips since he was
tiny. For him, the train was an adventure,
something new to discover.
For much of the four-hour ride, those little
eyes peered from windows, absorbing the
different landscape — extensive evergreen
forests, some ravaged by long-forgotten fires
— andmalcing note of commentary provided
by tour employees.
Though the weather was rainy and cool,
our arrival in Moosonee was greeted by a
cheerful bus driver, Rick, who made the
excursion around the remote "near Arctic"
community both enjoyable and enlightening.
Across to the island of Moose Factory by
boat, my son witnessed a native Canadian
woman cooking traditional barmock bread (a
remnant of the Scottish immigrant impact)
over an open fire in a teepee then entered a
staff house used by employees of the
Hudson's Bay Company when they opened
the north.
Venturing around the sister-communities
with a combined population of 5,000, on
one's own, would not yield all the stories
hidden in the long history.
Rick tells of an old frame church built
over 10 years from 1856 to 1865. Being
situated on an island, the land was prone to
flooding. As the completion of the church
neared, one of those floods struck. When the
men could return to view the damage the
church was gone. Flood waters had simply
lifted it off its foundation and floated it
down stream. The men climbed into canoes,
found the church, wrapped it with ropes and
rowed it back to its site.
It now has drain plugs in the floor so flood
waters can enter and leave without moving
the building. A high water mark remains on
the church walls above the height of the pew
backs.
After a day filled with walking, listening
and learning, not even the long train ride
back to Cochrane could dampen my little
man's enthusiasm.
He watched as the train meandered around
curves in the dark, allowing him to see the
glow of lights from both the front and the
rear. He recounted his favourite parts of the
day and the many pictures he had taken from
the windows.
It is those times, when there are no
distractions, just family being together, that
should be grasped and remembered. For
although he is only six now, how long will it
be before adventures with mom and dad are
no longer his first choice?
Arthur Black