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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 1998-01-21, Page 5A Final Thought The future belongs to those who believe in their dreams. International Scene By Raymond Canon THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 21, 1998. PAGE 5. All out of broccoli — loccoli Roy Blount Jr. is a droll, laconic gentleman of the south Georgia, persuasion. He is also one of my favourite funnymen. Or he used to be. Right up until he wrote the following poem: ODE TO BROCCOLI The corner store is all out of broccoli. Loccoli It's not that I think the poem is unfunny. It's just that I feel compelled to defend the commodity in question. In fact, I might as well own up: I consider myself the white knight of the maligned vegetable. A Crusader for the Crucified Cruciferae. That's right — call me a pervert, but I actually like broccoli. Popeye pimps for spinach. Bugs Bunny stands up for carrots. The Jolly Green Giant is a pea and niblets front man. But of all the vegetables in a can of alphabet soup, from asparagus to zucchini, it's broccoli that lights my fire. I know it's not a popular choice. Near as I can figure, people have always had a knee- jerk hatred for broccoli. A classic cartoon in The New Yorker magazine shows a sulky kid at the dinner table, arms crossed, scowling at his dinner plate and saying, "I say it's broccoli and I say the hell with it!" My own kids wrinkle their noses in distaste Struggling with Czech How, you may well ask at this stage of my stay in the Czech Republic, am I coming along with my attempt to learn the Czech language, at least adequately enough to make myself understood and to get around the city without feeling that I'm lost in some impenetratable jungle? I thought you would never ask. Before I left Canada, I talked with a Czech-Canadian working at the university and went over a few key phrases that might be of help to me at the beginning. However, as anybody who has ever done this knows, when it comes time to use any of these phrases it doesn't always work out the way it is supposed to. I arrived at the main station in Prague where I had to change trains. But where was the train to Ostrava? After three attempts to extract this information from Czechs standing nearby, I gave it up as a lost cause. I may have phrased the question correctly, but, I never did figure out their answer. At least they were polite enough not to break down laughing at my accent. I finally located the large announcement board which gave the arrivals and departures of all trains and the correct platform and away I went. I am pleased to report that I got at the mere mention of the B-word. Even George Bush, back when he was president of the Excited States, felt compelled to go on record as a dedicated broccoli-loather. What is this? Broccoli is better looking than your average Idaho spud or gnarly old yam. It certainly smells better than steamed turnip or boiled cabbage. And as for taste, I'd put it up against sauerkraut or parsnips any dinner time. Broccoli belongs to the mustard family, as do a lot of greenery that we don't mind chowing down on. Kohlrabi, kale, collards, Brussels sprouts, cabbage and cauliflower — they're all kissing cousins of broccoli — but they don't get the bad press the way poor old broccoli does. Hard to figure why. Maybe it's the unnaturally dark green colour that broccoli boasts. Or maybe it's the fact that one of Hollywood's more reptilian producers answered to the name of Albert "Cubby" Broccoli. Whatever the reason, it's an unfair rap. That 'unnaturally green colour' is mute testament to the fact that broccoli is chock full of chlorophyll — and that's not all that's good about it. It's loaded with beta carotene, a known cancer combatter. Broccoli is also rich in something called isothiocyanates, which experts say stimulate detoxifiers in the human immune system. As a matter of fact, researchers at Johns Hopkins University in the U.S. are touting a kind of super broccoli that they claim can reduce the size of cancerous tumours. There's nothing magical about the Johns on the right train and in due course arrived at Ostrava, where I was met by someone who took me the remaining 20 kms to Frydek- Mistek. On the negative side I must report that my efforts to use my limited vocabulary on the train met with something less than resounding success. I was able to pick out a few words but only because they sounded like Russian words. If you wonder what Russian has to do with all this, now is as good a time as any to inform you that Czech and Russian are members of the Slavonic group of languages and many of the words are similar. On the other hand, many are not and the Czechs seem to take delight in using as many words as possible from this second group. I was little farther ahead. It was, I realized, going to be a long and hard haul. It was that, but any language is. Just as those who have immigrated to Canada and have had to struggle with the English language and its oddities. Like English, Czech has a few sounds that were created to torment anybody trying to learn the language. The worst is an 'r' which has an accent mark over it and is pronounced more or less as zsh. Music lovers will find it in the name of the composer Dvorak. This is actually pronounced Dvorzshak. It would be fine if this 'r' were followed without fail by a vowel but, sadly to say, it is not. Seldom has my tongue been twisted in such an impossible knot. However, I am Hopkins' discovery — they've simply turned their attention on broccoli sprouts rather than the finished plant that most of us buy in the supermarket. The scientists discovered that broccoli sprouts are 30 to 50 times richer in anti-cancer compounds than mature broccoli heads. Let me put it another way: if you wanted to reduce your risk of contracting colon cancer by eating broccoli heads you'd have to chew your way through two pounds of the stuff each week. Even I don't like it that much. On the other hand, you could obtain the same benefits by eating just one ounce of broccoli sprouts. How do broccoli sprouts taste? Not bad, apparently. Folks who've tried them say they taste pretty much like your regular bean or alfalfa sprouts with perhaps a bit of a broccoli tang. That's the good news. The bad news is that it takes a long time for any new food to get through the battery of government tests and trials designed to ensure that it is suitable and safe for human consumption. That means you can't buy government-approved broccoli sprouts for love or money anywhere in North America right now — and the Johns Hopkins scientists doubt that we'll see them in supermarkets and corner stores until late 1998 at the earliest. So until that happens, I guess that all of us — you, me and Roy Blount Junior — will just have to content ourselves by eating bales and bales of regular, dark green broccoli. Unloccoli. gradually getting the hang of it: at least people have stopped laughing ... almost! Fortunately for me, Czech grammar is frequently like Russian, and it is easy to understand how they form their sentences, not to mention the endings that they put on adjectives and nouns. Any German-speaking readers know all about that. At any rate the other day I was able to send off a fax to Canada, ask directions to the nearest drug store, buy what I wanted there and ask the secretary at the office to arrange something for me. All this was done entirely in Czech so I am making progress. Even the Czechs I work with think so! In my struggles I can offer a bit of advice to those who are currently trying to learn a language, be they students or not. Don't get frustrated. It is a long process. Keep away from trying to memorize long lists of words of any kind. That is self-defeating. Start with short sentence patterns and work off them. Laugh at your mistakes and confine your study to a few minutes each day. Spending hours at it is also self-defeating. After all, your goal should be to achieve a working knowledge of the language, not become a literary giant. The short of it By Bonnie Gropp A fact of life Personally, I have nothing against alcohol. It has been a part of life for as long as I can recall. My parents were weekend drinkers, my siblings and I have always included liquor as part of any social function. However, I also learned early that moderation is the key and if it isn't you best lock the door on this little pastime. This is not to say that I haven't had my moments. Few who imbibe from time to time have not had occasions that they wouldn't rather forget, or perhaps wish they could remember. For this reason, I also have to acknowledge that while I obviously have nothing against drinking, society would be a lot better off without it. Just read the news or spend a day in court if you have any doubts. In last week's Kitchener-Waterloo Record was the story of former Ontario energy minister Will Ferguson's recent trail. He was sentenced to a week in jail and two years probation after beating up his estranged wife following a night of drinking. The judge's remark? "If you didn't drink, you wouldn't be here." This past week in our district court, three out of five there to enter guilty pleas had been drinking at the time of their arrest. (One of the other two was growing marijuana so I wouldn't exactly say he is exempt from this discussion.) Court is a depressing beat to cover and it's even worse when you consider that many of the people standing before that judge are just normal folk, people who would not be in such a degrading position, if alcohol was not a part of their life. They are people who would never embarrass themselves while sober, yet will make a public nuisance of themselves when drunk. They would never harm another individual when thinking clearly, but maddened by alcohol find a temper raging out of control. They would never pick up a loaded gun, but will climb behind the wheel of a car, point it and drive. Whether or not you drink heavily, moderately or seldom, you would be ignorant to suggest that alcohol doesn't cause problems. The Alcohol Policy Network Priorities said that alcohol has already cost Ontario taxpayers approximately $2.9 billion a year. Alcohol use can be attributed to a wide range of health and social issues, from family violence and suicide to traffic fatalities and injury. For most Ontarians alcohol is the drug of choice. A 1993 survey showed that 74.4 per cent of us, 15 and older, had consumed alcohol that year. A recent study indicated that those who begin drinking before the age of 15, and there are unfortunately many, are more likely to have a problem as adults. And according to representatives of the Huron County Health Unit, the best way to control consumption is to limit the availability. I wonder. While I'm not saying I agree with liquor stores being open on Sundays, neither do I consider the alternative a deterrant, because if someone wants a drink, there are no shortages of places to get one. It's really an issue of responsibility isn't it? The onus is not on the supplier, but on the consumer. For better or worse, alcohol is a part of life and unfortunately it will continue to do its damage to some lives. The best the rest of us can do is try to set a good example by teaching our children to treat liquor with respect and handle it responsibly. Arthur Black