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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 1999-09-15, Page 5THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 15, 1999. PAGE 5. Saved by a chin hair! I am shocked! Shocked, do you hear? A report in the London Daily Telegraph reveals that in Britain, beards are definitely Not On. The Brits - both males and females it seem? - hate beards on men. A survey reveals that readers consider unchecked facial foliage to be a sign of deep untrustworthiness. Recently, three bearded television ‘presen­ ters' (that's what they’d call Lloyd Robertson in England) - were discreetly encouraged to start shaving their mugs - or look for another line of work. I don’t know why this should surprise me. The British tend to be deeply suspicious of ‘unnecessary’ hair, wherever it sprouts. Witness the headline storm last month when actress Julia Roberts, on a visit to the UK, lifted an arm, revealing - gasp! - an unshaven armpit. You’d think from the ruckus that Prince Philip had been caught shoplifting in Harrod’s. JULIA ROBERTS, PRETTY HAIRY WOMAN thundered the headline in The Daily- Mail. “Probably some feminist statement type thing, The Americanization of Canada Ever since I became a Canadian citizen, I have been reading articles of every length and kind about the imminent Americanization of our country and its institutions. If it is any consolation, we are not the only ones playing such a theme. This is also at the heart of the separatist movement in Quebec and it is hard to pick up a newspaper in France without finding something about the threat that American culture and business practices pose to France. As far as maintaining a distinct society is concerned, Canada and Switzerland have a lot in common. Most of the 8 million Swiss speak German, but just north of the country are 80 plus million Germans, not to mention the five million German-speaking Austrians to the east. It is a battle in Switzerland to keep the German influence to a minimum. If that were not enough, the 1 1/2 million French-speaking Swiss are separated by a border from 50 plus million Frenchmen while Ticino, the small Italian-speaking canton, faces 50 plus million Italians. You can just imagine the foreign influence coming from all sides. It struck me, even back in the 1950s that Canada was a great deal like the United States. It is difficult to distinguish between our English and that spoken by a good many Americans. When in Europe, Canadians are regularly being taken for Americans to the point where I have, for years, used English as little as possible. Most of the movies I saw then were made in Hollywood; most of them still are. By and large our food was and still is similar as are our clothing styles. Yet there are differences here just as there are differences between the Swiss Germans and their neighbours. Canadians are somewhat more conservative in taste than the Americans. They are more rather than laziness, but it still looks bloody awful,” harrumphed a columnist in The Star. Puh-leeze. I may be out of the mainstream, but I happen to find underarm hair in women a bit of a turn­ on. It's a sign of sexual maturity, and what’s wrong with that? Never did understand why society decreed that half the human race should have armpits resembling a plucked Christmas goose. But if plucking pit hairs is perverse, what about a social custom that encourages the other half of the human race to scrape the fur off their faces? Ever stopped to wonder why men endure this barbaric daily ritual? And why just the jowls? If hair is so objectionable, why not shave our eyebrows? The sides of our noggins?. The whole damned skull? In case you haven’t yet twigged, I wear a beard. Have done since 1972 when I faced the bathroom mirror for the umpteenth gazillionth morning with a face festooned in Gillette Foamy, looked into my own bloodshot eyes and asked myself: “Why the hell am I scraping my face?’’ Couldn’t come up with an answer, so I By Raymond Canon concerned for the common good of the country which leads to all sorts of equalization programs. We have a totally different attitude toward guns and their use and many of our institutions are of British or French origin rather than American. We are considerably less prone to flag waving, more ready to compromise and are considered to be one of the most polite people in the world. In the eyes of others we win hands down compared to the Americans. Finally, our politics are not as right wing. The Americans have nothing even close to a social democratic movement as we do here. To sum all this up, one of the most apt statements I have read to date refers to former U.S. President George Bush, who stated he wanted his country to be a “kinder, gentler place.” In essence, it was pointed out, he was thinking of Canada as a blueprint. If we want to start somewhere to keep Canada Canadian, as it were, we might stop being so negative about our country and take more pride in it. Judging from some of the letters-to-the-editor, you might be forgiven for thinking that we live in Bangladesh or Panama. I recently got a book from Switzerland written by a Swiss and entitled “Canada - Oasis for Investors and Immigrants.” All Canadians who are negative about our country should read it. (I’ll lend them my German dictionary). Any country which can be designated six years in a row by the United Nations as the best country in which to live can’t be all bad. Free trade will not sell us down the river nor will our common language with the Americans. What we have to do is support Canadian culture of all kinds, not to mention the various aspects of our way of life that we I 1 A Final Thought If you don’t know where you are going, you will probably wind up somewhere else. - Laurence J. Peter ---------------------------------------11. / <;------ii—i—. scrapped my scraper and haven't shaved since. In 28 years, I have detected virtually no Canadian beard bias - aside from a couple of blue-haired old dears in Thunder Bay who thought my whiskers identified me as a card- carrying Bolshevik. Hey - The Fathers of Confederation, Robertson Davies, Farley Mowat, David Suzuki - Canadians have a warm and distinctly un-British appreciation for facial fur. Or, more precisely, for the fact that you can't judge the quality of the floorboards by the depth of the broadloom. Let’s say the average man spends five minutes a day shaving (don’t forget, some bluebeards shave twice a day). That’s 1825 minutes a year. Over the 28 years that I haven’t shaved, I’ve saved 51,100 minutes. Or, 851.6 hours. In other words, I’ve added a little over five weeks to my lifetime, just by not shaving. Had I been British, I would have been encouraged to spend those five extra weeks, lathering up my mug and scraping off hairs. To paraphrase an old tea commercial: “Only in Britain, you say?” Serves ‘em bleedin’ right. have here and that we consider worth saving. We can’t do it all at once but we can single out those areas where we as individuals can make a positive impact. Many Canadians are doing just this right now! If there ever comes a day when our Canadian way of life goes by the board, it will be because we have let it go, not because we have had it taken away from us. Letters Letters to the editor are a forum for public opinion and comment. The views expressed do not necessarily reflect those of this publication. THE EDITOR, Any reader who is at least 35 years of age, will likely know exactly where they were and what they were doing on Sept. 28, 1972. That day, Paul Henderson scored the “Goal of the Century” in the last game of the first Canada- Russia hockey series. If you remember that date 27 years ago then you will want to be in the Zurich Arena on Sept. 9, 1999 at 7 p.m. for the International Plowing Match Church Service (IPM ’99). Our guest speaker at the IPM ’99 Church Service is the same Paul Henderson who made hockey history in 1972. That goal changed Paul’s life forever. He is not only a national hero but also a devoted Christian, a lay minister and a gifted motivational speaker. Henderson will share his remarkable testimony at this service. Music for this service will be provided by a mass choir of 300 Huron County voices. Service leadership will be provided by nine capable young adults from nine different denominations. Three sign language interpreters will be present, and the Zurich arena is wheelchair accessible. Everyone is welcome to worship with us. Sincerely, Bruce Whitmore . IPM ’99 Qhurch Service Chair. Set an example They drive too fast. They drive under the influence. They use drugs. They know the risks — why are they so stupid? How many times as an adult, have you wondered these things about adolescents? And the rationale is always the same — with ingenuousness, and youthful high spirits they believe they are immortal, invincible. So what's our excuse? We have, I'm afraid not always been the best example. Last week, a family friend dropped dead of a heart attack at the age of 52. He loved life and lived it and if anyone had told him he was going to die so young, he would have, as any of us, resented it. Yet, knowing he was at risk, he continued to smoke, ate foods high in cholesterol and enjoyed a fairly sedentary lifestyle. This is, believe me, not an attack on the type of person he was, intelligent, charming, fun to be with. But to varying degrees guilty, as are most of us, of an insouciant disregard for personal well-being. This puzzling aspect of human nature dawned on me recently while speaking to the team member for this year's Terry Fox Run. He spoke a good deal about being responsible for one's own health, making sure you understood medically what your body needed by being informed and educated on what to ask. But he also noted the common sense fact that if you know what to do to keep yourself in good health, you should do it. Maybe it's all his years as a car dealer, but he's a believer, he says, in preventative maintenance. Take care of things and they should run well for a long time. Ask me and I'd tell you I intend to live a long, vigorous life. As a matter of fact, I delight in promising my kids they are going to be putting up with me for at least another 50 years. Yet, I find excuses for all kinds of foolish habits. I know for example that I feel infinitely better, more alert, energized if I follow a stringent, though not necessarily intense, exercise routine. But I am, you see, far too busy to fit it in. I know for example that late-night, fatty snacks are the bane of my hopes for a sleek existence. Yet, I must be allowed some indulgences in this world, right? I know for example that I drive much too fast, but I'm always in a hurry and I’ve only got so many hours in th^day to get everything that needs to be done, done. But, it's not just with regards to physical care that we take unlimited tomorrows for granted. Don’t put off that note of forgiveness. Make that phone call to an oft thought of, but seldom seen relative. Have lunch with an old friend. Take your kids on a long talked-about excursion. Give yourself that much promised day of indulgence. Allow yourself a few minutes each day for a deep, cleansing breath. It's all good for the soul. And fortunately, good for the soul is good for your health. I know few people who don't think of life as a precious gift. It is therefore remarkable that there are so many who then treat it with the feckless capriciousness of youth.