HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 1999-01-20, Page 5Arthur Black
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THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 20, 1999. PAGE 5.
Brains and crime
an unlikely mix
Robin Hood has been taken into custody.
Actually, his real name isn’t Robin Hood -
it’s Blane Nordahl - but the MO is unmistak
able. For the past 10 years Mister Nordahl has
been stealing things - but only from the rich
and famous.
He has stolen goodies from the home of
Bruce Springsteen. He has purloined jewelry
from the night table of Ivana Trump. He’s also
climbed through the windows of, and made off
with loot belonging to, Curt Gowdy, Goldie
Hawn, John Ritter and NYPD star Dennis
Franz.
But no more. The cops nailed Mister
Nordahl in Baltimore last month and discov
ered in his apartment close to $1.5 million
worth of gems, jewelry and assorted goblets,
candelabra and tea sets — all lifted from
celebrities.
Good stuff, too. "He knew the difference
between silver and silver-plated" said one
admiring detective.
"He was just like Robin Hood, stealing from
the rich. Except he didn’t give to the poor."
Which makes Blane Nordahl a couple of IQ
International Scene
The positive side
of a trip
I have literally lost track of the number of
times I have flown back to Europe since I
decided to settle for good in Canada. All of
them have included Switzerland on my itiner
ary. I always wanted to get to my old home for
a visit and sometimes the majority of my work
was to be found there, which meant that my
stay there was longer rather than shorter.
So it was that last summer, shortly after cel
ebrating the Swiss national holiday at the
Menzi farm near Monkton, I was on my way
again. From an emotional point of view, that
trip has to be one of the most rewarding I have
ever taken and I would like to share with you
some of my experiences, since you, too, have
probably had a trip that stands out in a positive
way.
After a couple of days in Germany one of
my first stops was in St. Gallen. As usual these
past few years I stayed at a hotel in Teufen,
about 10 kms away, since I know the owner
and feel completely at home there. Indeed I
had Sunday dinner with them so that we could
get caught up on each other's news.
One of my first visits was to my mother's
grave; she meant so much to me and the least I
can do is lay some flowers each time I am
there.
Then it was off to the University of St.
Gallen where I learned all of my economics.
About 20 years ago, when my mother was still
points sharper than, say, Sean McCann of
Macroom, Ireland. Sean walked into a bank
with an ominous bulge beneath his jacket,
advising the teller to fill a sack with money or
he’d "blow them all to Kingdom Come."
Unfortunately, Sean's grip on his jacket
slipped, revealing the bulge to be ... a banana.
"I-I-I-It's rigged to explode!" yelled Sean.
But not loud enough to drown out the
gales of laughter from the bank staff and cus
tomers.
And then there's the sad case of Roger
McCown aged 20, of Toledo, Ohio. Mister
McCown, an aspiring thief, had one of those
days that makes a guy want to ask: what's the
point? Is it worth it?
First, he tried to hold up a convenience store
in suburban Toledo. Not the type to pussyfoot
and beat around the bush. Mister McCown
decided to cut out the middleman by stealing
the entire cash register.
Cleverly, he leaned over to slash the electri
cal cord that powered the cash register and
tethered it to the aforementioned convenience
store.
When Mister McCown regained conscious
ness...
Actually the electrical shock didn't knock
Mister McCown out, but it did ... confuse him
slightly. He jumped up and ordered the clerk to
put all the cash register money in a bag.
"Paper or plastic," inquired the clerk
By Raymond Canon
alive, I set up a fund at the university in her
name since, far too often, people do things to
honour someone after they are dead, not
before, and I wanted to be the exception to this
rule.
The current president of the university is an
old hockey player from Schaffhausen who
played in Switzerland about the same time I
did. When I arrived, he met me and announced
that they had a little presentation to make. I
was given a copy of the new book about the
campus architecture plus an official university
tie which had just been created.
Needless to say, I went away from there feel
ing pretty good.
When I was in Frydek-Mistek in the Czech
Republic, I was asked if I would give a speech
on Canadian culture at the annual German
Week held there. The speech had to be in
German in order to tie in with the theme of the
week.
It was only a few hours before I was to start
that I learned that it was, in fact, the keynote
speech and was intended to set the tone for the
entire week. Communications are sometimes
not what they should be in the Czech
Republic; somebody had forgotten to tell me
of my role in this conference.
Still, I felt honoured and gave the speech
everything I had. Incidentally, I do not read my
speeches, I write it out and then, by the time
the speech has to be made, I am acquainted
with all the details and can speak more or less
extemporaneously.
Towards the end of my stay in the Czech
Republic, the church I had been attending
decided to hold a farewell supper for me. I was
really touched, even if I did have to eat
dumplings one more time. At the end I was
solicitously.
Too much for Roger. With a yipe he tossed
his knife up in the air and fled to his waiting
getaway car.
He thought.
In fact, his getaway driver was no swifter
than Mister McCown and had gotten lost on
his way to pick up the thief.
Mister McCown was still standing on the
appointed street comer, looking vainly up and
down the avenue, when the police cruisers
rolled up.
Not an easy calling, the life of crime.
Consider the case of the burglar who crept into
a darkened house one night only to be greeted
by a voice saying, "JESUS IS WATCHING
YOU!"
The burglar freezes, stunned ... shines his
light in the direction of the voice and sees ...
A parrot sitting on a perch.
"Did you say that?" hissed the burglar.
The parrot nodded, "Just trying to warn
you."
"Oh," says the burglar, gaining confidence.
"Here's a birdbrain parrot, trying to warn me.
So what's your name?"
"Moses," says the parrot.
"Moses?" laughs the burglar. "What kind of
idiotic people would name a parrot Moses?"
And the parrot says, "I don't know. I guess
the same kind of people that would name a rot-
tweiller, Jesus."
presented with a Czech bible with an inscrip
tion in it referring to my stay there.
Finding a church I could attend was impor
tant for me, especially as I was such a long
way from home, and the minister, who had
been the country's deputy prime-minister after
the Russians had left and President Havel set
up the first government, made sure that I was
completely at home. Since the church was only
about 100 metres away from my office, it was
easy to slip over during the week when I felt
the need.
Finally, the evening before I left for home, I
was invited out for what I termed the last sup
per. Toward the end of the meal, the Czechs
informed me that, because of all my successful
work on behalf of the Czech Republic and the
local college, the newly-created library at the
latter place would be named The Professor
Raymond Canon Library.
To say that I was floored would be putting it
mildly, but you can imagine how I felt on the
way back to Canada.
Now you can see why I considered this trip
to be so positive. There are still joys to be
found in life.
A Final Thought
The pleasure of criticizing robs us of the
pleasure of being moved by some very fine
things.
Jean de La Bruyere
The
Short
of it
By Bonnie Gropp
Look for the right
"No one gives a damn about anyone any
more."
This remark came from a friend last week
and considering some of the news reports we
hear nowadays it's hard to disagree. Amidst
stories of total disregard for the suffering and
pain of another human being, or those of self
ishness and greed it's sometimes difficult to
maintain a positive attitude regarding our fel
low homo sapiens. People take what they
want, and look out for number one. They kill
without conscience, maim on a whim.
Try to believe in humanity when you've just
heard a media report about a father who in a
drunken stupor tossed his two tiny children
out a window because he wanted to see them
fly.
On a smaller, though no less depressing
scale, we see examples of bitterness, cynicism
and hostility. You just have to work with the
public or travel the 401 to know I'm right.
A television sitcom recently touched on the
subject with the title character discovering
that his acts of kindness led to troubles. He
began to question his earlier belief that socie
ty is inherently good. In good-old fairy tale
fashion the conclusion reinforces his previous
conviction.
And rightly so. Because, while we may not
notice them in the same way as their nasty
counterparts, there are Good Samaritans at
work amongst us everyday.
I'm not sure why the negative stands out
more than the positive. Perhaps it is because
we are primarily all decent people that the
shock of bad behaviour is more likely to catch
our attention than an act that most of us would
emulate given the circumstance.
But one thing is guaranteed, you don't have
to look far when you need to be reminded that
people are still okay.
And it's not always the grand gesture that
affirms this for us. Kindness can be most
appreciated when in its most simplistic form
at just the right moment.
Sometimes its the spontaneous act that can
warm the heart. For example, last week's blis
tering cold permeated the uninsulated
Brussels Citizen office in a relentlessly brutal
manner. After spending one day there my
bones ached and I was chilled to the marrow.
On my second day a gentleman, after listen
ing to me whine of my plight, kindly drove to
his home and returned with a space heater for
my use.
Insignificant to you perhaps, but a gesture of
the warmest kind to me.
Actually winter often provides opportunity
in which to notice the good in those around us.
People lend a hand to help you clean a lane, to
start your car. We grumble good-naturedly
about the weather, wearing smiles of accept
ance. Winter's harsh attack is a common com
plaint that bonds us together against an out
side force.
We don't always take the time to recognize
favourable attributes when they appear, nor
consider their impact. So I wondered if for the
rest of the season, perhaps, we could make a
point every day of looking for the goodness,
for the tiny acts of kindness, for the positive
force fighting the negative pull. Let's try to
focus on what's right for a change rather than
what's wrong.