The Citizen, 1997-08-20, Page 5^Arthur Black
THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, AUGUST 20,1997 PAGE 5.
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Newspaper
bloopers
A reporter is a person who becomes
an expert on any conceivable subject
between 1 o'clock in the afternoon
and a 6 p.m. deadline.
Anon
Let me declare my infirmity right off the
top: I am a newspaper junkie. I love 'em.
Dailies. Weeklies. Fat ones. Skinny ones.
Prestigious international 'Journals of Record'
and lurid, scummy supermarket tabloids.
I read them all just about every chance I get.
And I guess you've got a soft spot for
papers too - or else we wouldn't be meeting
like this, would we?
One of the things I find most endearing
about newspapers is their fallibility. You
never know when you're going to open a
paper and discover a tremendous boner in
black and white. Last month, The Globe and
Mail ran an illustration of the locks at Sault
Ste. Marie. The cutline under the illustration
explained that the locks controlled the water
"from Lake Superior as it runs into Lake
Ontario."
Grade 7 geography, anyone?
Newspapers (not this one of course) get it
wrong. A lot. Maybe it's because they're
International Scene
■ z
How much do
you earn?
I often get asked how much people earn in
other countries compared to wages in Canada
and I must admit right at the outset that this
is an extremely difficult question to answer.
For one thing you have to use an exchange
rate which in many cases is out of line.
Furthermore, working conditions vary from
country to country and while you might be
prepared to do a job in one country at a
certain rate, you might well refuse to do the
same type of job elsewhere at the same rate
of pay or even more.
Finally, you may fmd that the cost of living
in one country is considerably higher than in
another.
I recall going down to New York one time
to act as a translator. When I was finished my
temporary assignment, I was offered a
permanent job with a salary 20 per cent
higher than anything I had ever been offered
in Canada. After looking at what it cost to
live in New York, I found that I would have
to lower my standard of living even at the
higher salary. Needless to say I decided to
stay in Canada and I cannot say that I ever
regretted it.
Now and again I come across a study
which is reasonably accurate in comparing
wage levels in various countries. This one
confirms what other studies have indicated,
that the country with the highest wage level
has been and continues to be Germany.
One of the main reasons for this is the
produced in such a rush. Sometimes the error
is serious. Sometimes it's even libelous.
But a lot of times it's merely hilarious.
Consider newspaper want ads. The Society
For The Prevention of Cruelty to Animals
could probably win a lawsuit on behalf of the
pets in some of the want ads I've read - such
as:
Lost: Apricot poodle, Neutered.
Like one of the family.
***
For sale: Eight puppies from a German
Shepherd and an Alaskan Hussy.
♦♦♦
Dog for sale: Eats anything
and is fond of children
Are you looking for someone to hire? If you
use the want ads, make sure you get
somebody to proofread your plea. Otherwise
you might get something like:
Wanted: Fifty girls for stripping
machine operators in factory.
***
Wanted: Man to take care of cow
who does not smoke or drink.
Man wanted to work in dynamite factory.
Must be willing to travel.
Lawyer seeking accomplished,
well-recommended deceptionist.
***
By Raymond Canon_____
generous level of holiday pay and social
security contributions made by employers. If
we were to count only the wages for time
worked, Denmark would be the most
generous country followed closely by
Norway and Switzerland. The latter, by the
way, follows Germany as the second highest
wage level in the industrialized world.
Where does Canada stand in all this? Well,
we come in at about two-thirds of the
German scale; we run neck and neck with the
United States. Given our currently favourable
exchange rate, the gap between the two
countries is actually considerably greater
than what shows up on the chart.
For the most part, non-wage benefits are
considerably greater in Europe than in North
America. Given the very rigid labour markets
which exist in Europe, it is no surprise that
unemployment is much higher there than on
this side of the ocean.
Finally the lowest levels are in such
southern European countries as Greece,
Portugal and Spain. This hasn't done much
for Spain; its rate of unemployment is stilk
over 20 per cent.
Getting back to Germany, the rigid labour
markets, to which I referred above, are
causing them all sorts of problems. There are
currently 400,000 workers looking for jobs
and this number seems fit to increase by
another 80,000 before the end of the year.
Yet there are 190,000 foreign workers on
construction projects and probably another
200,000 who are part of the underground
economy. These two groups of workers are
not only cheaper than German ones; they are
more flexible and faster, quite willing to
Even travel ads can turn out to be middens
of unintentional humour:
The hotel has tennis courts,
soft beds and other athletic facilities.
***
Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking
backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim
in the lovely pool while you drink it all in.
***
Some newspaper ads you don’t even want to
think about. Such as this one plugging the
dramatic lineup al a New York theatre:
Featuring three Shakespeare plays: Hamlet,
Macbeth and Anatomy and Cleopatra.
Or the Used Furniture Want Ad that
offered:
An antique desk suitable for lady
with thick legs and large drawers.
Or my personal favourite - an ad I actually
read in a paper years ago.
Illiterate? Write today for free help.
Finally, a sobering example of how
newspapers trying to do the right thing often
wind up making bigger booboos. This
'correction' actually appeared in a Thunder
Bay newspaper:
A report in yesterday's Times-News
referred to 'Sergeant Blaine, a 20-year
veteran defective of the police force.'
This was an error. It should have read
'Sergeant Blaine, a 20-year veteran
detective of the police farce.'
cross demarcation lines to speed things up.
Not only that but German workers are like
Canadians in that there are some jobs that
they really don't want to do. As a result of
being permitted to stay open longer,
something that I wrote about recently,
German bakeries have taken on 5,000 new
workers in the last six months. However, this
has not come close to filling demand for such
workers.
One official of the bakers' association has
expressed the view that young people do not
want to get up early in the morning to shovel
dough into a hot oven. "They value," he says,
"their social lives." That sounds very
familiar.
The demand for computer workers still
outstrips supply and German universities
complain that they cannot get enough
students to enter that field. That sounds
something like the problem we have here; we
still have to go abroad to fill the demand for
tool-and-die makers. In spite of the good
salaries, young Canadians do not seem to
want to enter that field.
Wages are obviously not everything when
it comes to finding jobs. It would be well to
look at the labour market rigidity which is
plaguing the Germans and other nationalities.
The Americans, with the lowest level of
rigidity, have the lowest rale of
unemployment; the British, also with
relatively little rigidity, are not far behind.
A Final Thought
Nothing is as hard to do gracefully as
getting down off your high horse.
The
The rest is change
For a time it was as if we had closed the
door on the rest of the world — and I loved
it.
Cozy in cottage country last week, my
family and I revelled in our solitary
seclusion. Away from outside distractions
we saw people we chose to, went where and
when we wanted and forgot time and
trouble.
But it wasn't just the change of pace that
was so welcome, it was as well the change.
Rather than a startled awakening from an
alarm our dawning to daylight was charmed
by the sounds of nature. The work-a-day
world around us was not so much being
carried out by the two-legged variety, but
rather by the feathered and furred. Loons
fishing and squirrels gathering replaced the
frenetic hustle and harried expressions often
seen in the human habitats.
Evenings were highlighted not by a
television screen but by a panoramic view of
midnight water and crimson sky. Sleep came
not with exhaustion to the strains of traffic,
but with us soothingly lulled by the roll of
waves and rustle of trees.
They say a change is as a good as a rest
and for mine I was grateful. Though I could
gladly have lived with that change for
another week, it was indeed restorative.
But it was also good to leave while I was
still enjoying myself. I have not spent all this
time on earth and not learned that even the
best places lose their appeal when they
become the norm. The grass on the other
side of the fence never seems as green after
you cross over.
This latter point was really brought home
to me on Sunday, when we spent a day with
friends in the city. The 'happening'
cosmopolitan lifestyle is a goal for at least
one of my kids. This child of mine finds life
in rural Huron just a little predictable and
dreary. Occasionally, from an adolescent's
perspective I might even agree with her. Our
small towns are wonderful places in which
to raise children, offering many things. But
to the energetic youth those aren't always as
evident.
It was interesting, then, to hear my friend
expressing the problems of being an
adolescent in the city and discovering some
startling similarities. Teens have very little
to do, she said, with many seeking
entertainment by hanging out at the malls.
(See downtown Brussels or Bly th). Sure they
can go to the theatre or congregate at a
friend's home, but this often means
travelling a fair distance as once they get to
high school, just like their smalltown
'cousins', friendships are often formed with
people who live further afield.
One comment I found particularly
surprising was a familial aspect of city life I
hadn't realize existed. Their neighbourhood,
is populated by many teens whose parents
grew up in the same area. For newcomers,
she said, it can be a little cliquey, letting you
be a part of some things, yet always keeping
you apart from others.
All-in-all it was a gentle reminder to me
things are not always so different as they
may appear. And while change is
undoubtedly as good as a rest, it's wise to
remember that upon closer look some things
aren». so different as you might think.