The Citizen, 1997-06-11, Page 5Arthur Black
THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, JUNE 11, 1997 PAGE 5.
12 years of
oohs and aahs
In the future, everybody will be
famous for 15 minutes.
Andy Warhol
Christina Hance is only 36, but she's
already had 'way more than her allotted 15
minutes of fame. She's been famous for 12
years.
Twelve years of oohs and aahs from
crowds, of popping flashbulbs, and
spontaneous applause from total strangers.
Twelve years of waiting limos, fawning
shopkeepers, five-star hotels and front row
centre seats at the theatre.
Twelve years of being a world celebrity.
And she's sick to death of it.
You've never heard of Christian Hance?
Don’t feel bad. You have heard of Princess
Diana, right?
Well, Christina is a dead ringer for
Princess Di.
No when she gets out of bed in the
morning, you understand. Christina has to
work at it a bit. She dyed her mousy brown
hair the same shade as Di's and got an
identical cut. She learned to tilt her head just
so, and to smile that famous, shy, half-smile.
She also got herself a set of boob implants
to complete the effect.
International Scene
_________________________________________________________________________________
By Raymond Canon
Foreign ownership
in Canada
The recent, and not so surprising
announcement that the venerable T. Eaton
company was filing for protection under
Canada's bankruptcy laws brings up once
more the perennial question of how harmful
foreign competition is for Canadian
businesses.
I say this because one of the causes for
Eaton's downfall is claimed to be the entry of
the American retailer Wal-Mart into our
country. However, Wal-Mart is only one of
the examples used when an aggressive
foreign company enters our country with dire
results for some of our domestic firms.
I don't want to get into any argument about
Eaton’s except to say that it appears they
brought on most of their problems
themselves. However, their decline into the
protective bosom of the courts was
accelerated by stiff competition from such
Canadian firms at Zellers and the Bay.
There are a number of things to be kept in
mind before one comes down loo hard on
foreign companies doing business in Canada.
First of all, it is a two-way street.
Would it surprise you to leam that, on a per
capita basis, Canadians have a higher dollar
value in American holdings than the latter do
in Canada. If you read the American press,
you will soon note that Americans constantly
complain about Canadian firms selling such
things as grain, lumber, potatoes and
locomotives, to name a few.
When I was in Erie, Pa., not too long ago I
came across a letter to the editor from a
union president complaining that work was
being taken out of the Erie plant of General
Financially, it was a brilliant career move
for Christina. Before her Princess Di
makeover, Christina was just one of a million
London shop girls. Single mother. Part-time
stripper. Going nowhere. Then, in 1986 she
entered and won a Princess Di Lookalike
Contest on British TV.
Since then. Christina's been on magazine
covers and billboards from Land's End to
John O' Groats. She's worked Trade Fairs,
shown up in food commercials and been
'presented' at parties and corporate functions
from the Middle East to South America. And
it paid well. In her Princess Di
persona,Christina earned up to $15,000 a
day.
But it wasn't much fun. "A lot of jobs were
set up as if I were the real Diana" she says. "I
travelled in limousines and private jets and
was even given a bodyguard. I lived the life
of a princess for a day and then went home to
do the washing up. I fainted in a studio once
because I was so tired. They just picked me
up, made me a coffee and told me to carry
on."
Being a Princess Di clone wasn't so hot in
the romance department either. "There are
some men who only want to sleep with me so
they can imagine I'm the real Diana. I've
been out with men who say, 'Go on, do the
voice', or, 'Can you dress up as Di when we
go out to night?' I find that really bizarre and
it's insulting."
Electric with a loss of about 100 jobs. Where
was the work going? To Peterborough, Ont.
where GE said it could be done more
efficiently.
Ask the Maine potato farmers what they
think of their Canadian competition and you
are likely to hear a string of four-letter
words. These farmers got so mad that they
dumped loads of potatoes at every cross
point between Maine and New Brunswick.
In the aircraft industry the biggest single
producer of turboprop commercial planes in
the world is DeHavilland of Toronto (owned
by Bombardier and the Ontario government).
Bombardier has, in fact, turned Canada into
the fourth largest exporter of aircraft in the
world, an achievement which led, in part, to
the bankruptcy of the venerable Fokker
Aircraft company of Holland.
The word "awesome" comes to the fore
when you ask foreign competitors what they
think of Bombardier's achievements.
Sometimes it is hard to tell what is
Canadian and what is American. Not too
long ago Tim Horton Donuts was one of the
success stories in this country. In a recent
move Tim Horton sold out to Wendy's but, as
the main part of the purchase agreement,
became the biggest single shareholders in
Wendy's, with even more shares than those
held by Dave Thomas, the founder. Does that
make Wendy's (or Tim Horton's) an
American or a Canadian company, or both?
For your information Harvey's, Swiss
Chalet and KFC are the only Canadian-
owned among the major fast food chains.
McDonald',s for example, is wholly
American owned and dominates the market
here. Should we, therefore, boycott it?
This is not to say that there are no
situations where Canadian firms suffer
unfairly. The most frequent example is when
Has Christina ever encountered the woman
she imitates? Only once, and it wasn't
pleasant. "I was appearing as Princess Di in a
video and we were shooting at the gates of
Buckingham Palace," she recalls. "The real
Princess Di drove out the gales and shot me a
look that was pure daggers."
And that wasn't the only unpleasant
experience Christina Hance has had
pretending to be Diana, Princess of Wales.
Do you remember that mini-scandal in which
The Sun newspaper published a grainy photo
they claimed showed Princess Di and her
riding instructor doing some off-trail
bareback riding in a hotel room?
Well, it wasn't Princess Di's riding
instructor. And it wasn't Princess Di either.
The guy was some pom video actor. The
woman was Christina Hance.
It's hard to say from talking to her, just
how 'innocent' Christina is in all of this. She
took the money. And she couldn't be so dim
as to not realize that many of her assignments
were on the sleazy side.
Still, she's had enough and she wants off
the celebrity merry-go-round. "I'm going to
let my hair grow natural and I'm going to
slob out," she says.
So she's going to shed the Princess Di
exoskeleton she's been wearing for the past
12 years.
And hope like hell the world appreciates
whatever's underneath it.
foreign companies are guilty of dumping
products onto the Canadian market with a
price that is lower than what they charge al
home. There is also the recent situation
where Canadian publishers have to complete
with split-run American magazines which
can sold here with much lower production
costs than those experienced by the
Canadians.
In short, in a global economy that is
becoming more and more the norm these
days, you succeed only if you take your core
products and manage to sell them on
international markets. You have to be careful
how much protection you put in place to
shelter domestic industries to avoid any
retaliation.
I have always maintained in my economics
classes that Canadian firms, when faced with
strong foreign competition, actually do quite
well and the early studies of the free trade
agreement with the United Stales bear this
out. We have increased our exports to the
U.S. considerably more than they have to us.
When American firms come to Canada, in
most cases they have to offer products or
services which are equal to or better than
those provided by Canadian firms. Canadian
firms who take the challenge in a resolute
manner are usually able to hold their own or
even increase their market share.
When we have a justifiable complaint, we
should, of course, "stand on guard" but in the
long run we have, to date, been able to give
us good as we take.
A Final Thought
Good judgement comes from experience.
Experience comes from bad judgement.
The means of survival
I get a great deal of pleasure from baseball
— especially watching it. The subtleties of a
thinking game, the balletic moves of
precision plays carried off well, coupled
with my insatiable curiosity in people and
what makes them tick, arc laid out on a level
playing field for my perusal.
Watching a kids' game is always
enlightening. Young people with different
personalities, but a common desire, converge
on a diamond to have fun and even better
win. They play as a team, yet, at any lime
throughout the game, they can individually
be thrilled by triumph or abashed over an
error.
What I find fascinating is how each
handles it. You have the cocky jock, a banty
rooster who struts on the wins, and easily
sheds blame under a confident bravado.
There is the insecure under-achiever, who
takes the weight of each error onto his
already burdened shoulders, so solidly that
even a major accomplishment can only
lighten it somewhat.
There are the determined, the laissez-faire;
the intense, the casual; the serious, the
jokers; the weak and the strong.
Watching them you see how people react
to and deal with the things presented to them
in this mystery we each live. As a
temperamental pitcher who can't handle
unfair calls, there are those among us, who
can't accept that life isn't always going to
treat them the way they believe is just. As a
flighty fielder who gives up when the going
gets tough, there are those among us who see
adversity as an excuse to throw in the towel.
And as a dedicated catcher who stands his
ground when a behemoth has rounded third
and is coming straight for him, there are
those among us who will not give it up for
any challenger.
I recently spoke with someone who had
become a surrogate mother to three girls,
whose biological mother had died. They
were raised first in an abusive home, then in
a broken home, virtually ignored by the
father who gave them life. They were later
sexually abused by their step-father, pul into
foster homes, then left alone, while still just
teens, with the passing of their mother.
Today, one is embarking on a career in
medicine, one is happily married with a
family of her own and the third is at
teachers' college. My friend said that while
their mother had always accepted her lol as
inevitable, the girls determined early that
they would not give in. There was never any
self-pity, just a gutsy determination that
they would survive on their own terms.
People cope differently with the hand they
are dealt. I know for many years of my
youth I was ready to lay blame on oLhers for
my behaviour rather than face the
responsiblity on my own. One of the most
important things I've learned, and with
which I'm still struggling from time to time,
is that my happiness is in my power, and
only my power. The game may not always
turn out the way I had hoped, I may make
some errors along the way, get hurt or
treated unfairly, but I control how it all
makes me feel and what I do about it.
Survival is, after all, getting up just one
more time than you fall down.