The Citizen, 1997-04-30, Page 25THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, APRIL 30, 1997 PAGE 25.
For Teens, By Teens
Say, did you hear the latest about . . . ?
By Ashley Gropp
Have you heard about Jane?
Everybody's talking about her and
Mike...
While you find gossip in every
walk of life, high school's definite
ly a breeding ground for rumours
and gossip. Although most are
harmless and unbelievable, some
have the potential to ruin the per
son's life for years. Interestingly
enough, the most damaging
rumours tend to be the most
By Mark Nonkes
For your whole life you've been
waiting for this day. The day you
get your driver's licence!
The first step towards this was
writing the G1 multiple choice test.
Next is practice driving with your
parents, and sometimes other
family members in tow - and
listening to the constant, "watch
By Erin Roulston
After I wrote an article about
teenagers and smoking, a few of
your parents told me they wanted to
know about sex. Imagine that. Your
parents want to know about sex!
I must say, it's a little more
difficult to walk up to some
stranger and ask them if they are
sexually active, than it is to ask
them if they smoke. A few people
got a little defensive.
I spoke to about 20 teenagers,
from the ages of 15 to 18. About a
dozen of them were virgins, seven
were sexually active.
Of the non-virgins, four said they
were glad they did it; they enjoyed
it and didn't regret it at all. One girl
said she totally regrets doing it. She
was 16. She didn't love him, but
she had sex with him anyway. She
doesn't even know why.
Two people said they enjoyed it,
but they wish that they'd waited,
not necessarily until they were
married, but until they could at
least handle all the emotional
baggage that came with it.
Emotional baggage is one of the
reasons given for remaining a
virgin. Physical baggage as well. A
common concern among guys and
girls is teenage pregnancy. With so
many young girls with swelling
stomachs, it's painfully obvious that
accidents do happen. One girl I
spoke to said "I don't think I'm
mature enough to have sex until I'm
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unimaginative.
In discussion with other adoles
cents, the majority of rumours
going around at any given time,
seem to be based on sex. Maybe
you heard that Amy was pregnant
or that Erin and Sam had sex at a
party even though Erin's boyfriend
is John.
You might ask who would say
these things and why. Most of the
time rumours are spread by girls.
out" and "slow down".
Then there is the optional step,
taking Driver's Ed.
Finally you go for the big step
and make the appointment for the
Driving Test. As you call to make
the appointment, you hope for an
early date and a nice instructor.
You continue to practise hour
after hour to make sure you have
mature enough to take care of a
baby."
Some people have their religious
reasons, but most agreed that moral
reasons carried more importance.
They felt that waiting until you're
married just so you won't go to hell
is a pretty stupid reason.
Of the virgins I spoke to, seven
plan to wait. A few of them
doubted that they would follow
through, but that is what they plan.
Many said it just seemed less
complicated if you wait. No chance
of pregnancy, or diseases; not
having to worry about whether they
will still respect each other in the
morning.
Some people plan to wait, but not
until they are married. They want
to be in a loving relationship. They
want to be sure they can trust their
lover, and know them well.
Some people I spoke to just want
to get it over with. There's so much
stress in making the decision.
They'd much prefer to just do it and
not have to think about it. Yes, of
course there would be terrible
feelings of regret, but that seems to
be easier to deal with than the big
decision.
Teenagers have plenty of reasons
to do it. Besides the obvious,
there's curiosity, a way to show
your love, a way to impress your
friends, a way to prove that you're
mature.
Experts say there are a number of
reasons why. Some rumours are
spread out of revenge, some out of
jealousy and some out of sheer
boredom. Often by spreading a
rumour, a person feels in control
and superior to the person they are
discussing.
Why are people so willing to
believe eveything they hear? Is it
that people feel so insecure in
aspects of themselves that to hear
your turning, parallel parking, and
stopping just right.
Here are a few tips on things you
should not do during the test. You'll
probably fail if you do.
10. Don't treat your driving
examiner like a therapist, don't
start crying or yelling about your
bad love life. Not only will you be
labelled crazy, but also instead of
We also have plenty of reasons
not to: unwanted pregnancy, loss of
innocence, too young, too
irresponsible, lack of opportunity.
Diseases like AIDS don't seem to
be that big of a concern. Most teens
will, of course, practice safe sex,
but more for fear of pregnancy.
Maybe it's because not many
teenagers that we know, have
AIDS, or maybe we all expect our
partners to be virgins.
Teens know the dangers, but jo
some it doesn't seem worth the
sacrifice. They are not going to
give up jsex; they don't think they
are at risk.
You've all seen those TV shows
where the guy says to his girlfriend,
"If you really love me, you'll have
sex with me." Most of the guys that
I spoke to said they would never
say anything like that to a girl and
don't know anybody who would.
Guys usually have more sensitivity
than to pressures girl like that.
The girls I spoke to said that no
girl would fall for a line like that
unless they subconsciously wanted
to have sex.
So, parents who are worried, it
seems that your children are
already very set in their opinions,
and some of their ideas aren't that
bad.
Oh, and something else, all but
one of the sexually active teens had
kept it secret from their parents.
of failings in others makes them
feel better? There are experts who
agree that this can be a part of the
problem.
A desire to fit in, to think the
same thing as everybody else is
another reason for rumours to be so
easy to believe. So is the sensa
tionalism of it. This is the same
reason people buy the National
Equirer: They don't actually
believe that Michael Jackson's baby
looks like an alien, but they want to
giving you a licence they might
refer you to another institution.
9. Don't honk the horn when you
are waiting for the examiner to get
to the car.
8. In winter, try to stay away from
the snowbanks, and if you do get
stuck, don't ask the tester to push.
7. Don't stick your head out the
car window and make fun of slow
pedestrians.
6. Don't follow a fire truck; I
know it's tempting but this is your
test!
5. Do not crank up the music if
you hear your favourite song on
the radio.
4. Try to hold your bladder no
matter how bad you have to go -
and don't adjust yourself either.
3. Don't speed up if you see a
little animal crossing the road.
2. Even if the other guy
challenges you and calls your
vehicle names, no drag racing.
1. Make sure you are wearing
your glasses if you need them.
Without them, things may seem
different from what they really
are. Sidewalks become roads,
trees become invisible - all sorts
of things that will lead to failure.
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believe it because it's so out of the
ordinary.
If the nastiest rumour around
school was that Betty didn't do her
homework, then what would make
them fascinating?
When you think about it, you
should feel sorry for the people
who start rumours. If somebody
else's life is all they can talk about,
you have to wonder what's missing
in theirs.
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