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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 1997-04-30, Page 5THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, APRIL 30,1997 PAGE 5. O Arthur Black ___________________________________________ Just kidding, eh? Thank heavens for the Fortean Times - I thought perhaps it was just me. The Fortean Times is a British journal that tracks weird happenings and unexplained phenomena around the globe. And the latest issue of the Fortean Times claims the world became weirder last year. Two point nine per cent weirder, to be precise. The journal has published an Index of Weirdness which is divided into four sections: Animal, Human, Natural and Paranormal. After careful analysis, Fortean Times editors have announced that last year's weird stories, including bloodthirsty goatsuckers and fossil bacteria on meteorites, have catapulted the planet onto a whole new plateau of The Bizarre. Bloodthirsty goatsuckers? You missed that story? The Puerto Rican press has reported goat corpses that have been found with the blood - and even the livers - sucked right out of them via a pair of Dracula-like incisions in the neck. Nobody knows if the vampire culprit is winged, four-legged or favours a walking stick and a cape, but reports of His/Her/handiwork are showing up in Colombia, Brazil, Miami and the south of Spain. Pretty weird alright. The other story - the one about fossil bacteria being found on a 16- International Scene Swiss democracy It is surprising how little people know about foreign countries when they have never been there or even if they have for a short period. Quite frequently what little they do know is somewhat mixed up or confused. Thus it is that I frequently get asked questions about the type of democracy practised by the Swiss and it is obvious that the person asking the question is more than a little uncertain about the subject. A frequent question is about the Landsgemeinde, a word that the non-German speaker has trouble spelling or pronouncing correctly. I'll talk about that in a little while as well as about the country's propensity for referenda. First of all, if the basic unit of government in Canada is the province, that of Switzerland is the canton, some of which have been split up into half-cantons, each of which might just as well be considered as a single entity. There are 26 in all, and most of them are, of course, German speaking while a few are French and one, the Tessin, is Italian. Still another, Graubuenden, has most of the country's Romansch-speaking citizens but, since that is a national and not an official language, we won't refer to it as an entity. It should be stated right at the beginning that the country is extremely decentralized, even more so than Canada. The cantons spend as much money as the central government, control all the police forces, just about the entire education system, a great portion of the welfare system and most of the law-making power with regards to each canton's economy. Foreign affairs and defense are left to the central government in Bem, the capital, but decentralization is certainly the name of the game in the country. \ . million-year-old meteorite will be even weirder if it turns out to be true. It would confirm a century of Sci Fi speculation about the possibility of life on other planets. Alas, the scientists are squabbling over the veracity of the specimens, so the jury is still out. How does the Fortean Times explain the upshot in weirdness? They say it's due to PMT. That's Pre-Millennial Tension - the anxiety that subconsciously infects us all as we lurch toward the year 2,000. "PMT is gripping people" says a spokesman for the Fortean Times. "People get worried near the end of a century, with millennium cults predicting the end of the world. And that could explain why there is so much interest in the paranormal." Well, maybe. And maybe the editors of the Fortean Times are affected too. Because I read the whole issue and didn't find a single mention of some of my favourite weird stories from last year. Where for instance, is the story on the Indestructible Cake? How about the greatest golf feat of all time which came out of Korea last year? The cake story originated in the U.S., where last year, researchers at the Army Soldiers System Command managed to create a pound cake suitable for soldiers in the field. This cake can survive a fall from an airplane and temperatures that range from 120 degrees By Raymond Canon Now we take a look at the referenda which take place in Switzerland. Seldom do we have them in Canada; there they are held on a regular basis. In fact, there have been almost 450 of them. How do they get started? Actually it is very easy. All it takes is a petition with 50,000 names on it, a figure that is little more than one per cent of all qualified voters. The 50,000 signatures will bring about a vote on any new federal law while 100,000 signatures will permit you to put a totally new idea to a vote. I arrived there one day just as they were voting whether to permit the government to buy new fighter aircraft for the Flugwaffe or airforce. The purchase was permitted, but not by a great majority. At the risk of digressing slightly, the plane in question, the F-18, is the same plane as is used by the Canadian Armed Forces; it was a Canadian flying a plane from the Canadian Nato base at Baden Soellingen in Germany that demonstrated its capabilities to the Swiss. It was also the same aircraft whose crew won the prestigious William Tell competition from the Americans. Perhaps the Swiss will see that as a good omen. But back to Swiss democracy. The second rather unique aspect is the Landsgemeinde, an example of direct democracy used by five of the smaller cantons (or half-cantons). This has been described as a cantonal get-together where the major questions are not decided by a ballot but by a show of hands. It takes the better part of the afternoon. Women have had a vote in the country only for about the last quarter of a century but they take an active part in the Landsgemeinde although they are still thin on the ground when it comes to holding political office. If my memory serves me correctly, all the Landsgemeinden which take place are in the Fahrenheit to minus 60 degrees Fahrenheit. Oh yes, and it has a shelf life of five ... years. That's pretty scary too. As for the golf story, we owe that to the official news agency of North Korea. Perhaps that should read 'official public relations agency' of North Korea. All I know is last year the North Korean press reported that "Dear Leader" Kim Jong II played his first game of golf in astonishing style, scoring five holes-in-one and beating the world record for a single round of golf by 25 strokes. Since we're in the realm of comic relief, let me report another weird happening the Fortean Times appears to have missed - the rising incidence of Comedian Abuse. Last November, Al Romero a comedian in Lancaster, Pa., was cracking wise jokes about hicks from Arkansas when a customer by the name of Judy Strough (of Arkansas) walked up on the stage and slugged him. Two weeks earlier, comedian Timothy Ward filed a lawsuit in New York City against Prince Rainier of Monaco who, Ward says, backhanded him during a 1995 show in which he made fun of the Prince's eroding hairline. First Puerto Rican goats...then comedians.. .is nothing sacred? By the way, if you're reading this, Judy or Prince... Just kidding, eh? German speaking area, hence the German name. My French-speaking Swiss cousins give a variety of reasons for not making greater use of it; maybe they are a little upset at not having thought of it first. I don't want to leave you with the impression that the Swiss turn out in droves for all these manifestations of direct democracy; they do not. They sometimes get a bit weary of it all, just as Canadians do. The average turnout is generally less than 50 per cent. The most interesting aspect of it is that, if the French and Italian-speaking population do not like something in a referendum, they still need support from the German-speaking cantons to defeat a measure. If the latter decide that they like or dislike something being pul to a vote, there is little that the other two linguistic groups can do to offset it. I am fortunate in having roots in both the French and German-speaking parts. I hear far more griping in French than I do in German but nothing matches what I hear in Quebec. In short, separatism is a dirty word there; the French and Italian minorities, not to mention the tiny group of Romansch speaking citizens, know when they are well off. Nor are the Swiss a particularly homogenous lot. With so much decentralization, they tend to think as cantons, just as Canadians are preoccupied with their provinces, but this decentralization, together with the examples of direct democracy, certainly do a fine job of arriving at the common good for the entire country. We could do worse than studying their system a bit more closely. A Final Thought When looking for faults, use a mirror, not a telescope. Lifting the dust cover Spring cleaning — the time to lift the dust cover off the house, throw out winter’s stale leftovers and make room for freshness and light. Getting my house spic and span for spring is one job I simultaneously abhor and adore. Obviously the satisfaction of a job well done, a home as unstale and sparkling as a cheery spring day, is the driving reward. But, it's also a major undertaking that must be squeezed in to an already hectic and overloaded schedule. My conception of this annual ritual was formulated early. I remember as a young child watching my mother, also a working woman, hustling in her off-hours, in a mad frenzy to get everything done. I would come home from school to find the hallway crammed full of bedroom furniture while with ladder, pail and assorted rags and mops she eradicated unseen dirt on everything from the ceiling to vent covers. And I always found it amusingly ironic that while she worked to get the house to a state of surgical sterility, it was total chaos. But when a room was finished, the crisp cleanliness was worth it. It was a treasure that my mother, knowing she could not keep forever, guarded like a Crown jewel. "Don't go in that back bedroom," she’d say as I'd head down the hall. "I just finished cleaning in there.” While, eventually she knew the damage would be done, for now, she wanted to capture the pristine perfection she had created. A real bonus was in getting all the rooms finished before too much havoc could be wrought upon them, so that for just a while at least, the house would seem as fresh and new as the season, and she could relax with the feeling that for a time, her work was done. This has always been my goal, too, but I seem to lack the same dedication to the craft as my mother. As I procrastinate about beginning the work, my excuse is a tendency to blame the weather. Early, I argue that unseasonable coolness and drizzle does not inspire me to feel like spring cleaning. Unfortunately, then, as the weather warms, I find myself more inclined to take myself outdoors, than to work to bring its freshness inside. Even recruiting my children has not made the process move more efficiently. This past weekend, waylaid by a mild infirmity, I again saw another opportunity pass. But as I enjoyed moments to rest outside, feeling the sun's warmth soothe me, the gentle breeze heal me, I realized that there is more spring cleaning that should not be overlooked — that of the soul. Those first few weeks, after a silent winter our senses are enlivened by the music of birds and children at play. With illness allowing me a guilt-free opportunity to relax and breathe in spring, I decided this was as necessary a ritual as the one I attack with such vengeance indoors each year. Certainly, spring is a time when there is much to be done, but it is also a time of renewal and rejuvenation. It is a time to be active, but also a time to enjoy. So I sat this past week, letting this season work its magic on me. I know my spring cleaning will get finished, perhaps by August, but for now it was enough to lift the dust cover from my mind, throw out winter's stale leftovers and make room in my heart for freshness and light.