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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 1996-10-23, Page 5THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 23, 1996 PAGE 5. Learning English as a second language A spelling reformer indicted For fudge was before the court cited The judge said 'Enough — His candle we'll snough And his sepulcher shall not be whicted." Anon Do you ever think what it must be like for a newcomer to Canada? I mean a real newcomer — someone from Sri Lanka or Hong Kong or Ulan Bator who not only has never heard of k d lang or W. Gretzky — but doesn't even speak English? Can you imagine trying to learn English as a second language? How long would it take you to figure out what a sign like NO THROUGH STREET means? How long would it take you just to figure out how to pronounce that second word — is it "thruff' as in 'rough'? 'Throff as Swahili in 30 minutes One of the large multinational corporations in London approached me. It seems that there was one of their executives being transferred to one of their plants where Spanish was the spoken language. The executive and his wife had next to nothing in the way of Spanish and so the request was that I take the two and bring them up to fluency in the short time that remained before they took off. The operative words here are "in the short time." This assumption was based on an ad the company had noticed, which made a plausible case for learning a language quickly. "Within a few days," it said, you can order a meal. In two weeks, "you can converse with native speakers. After 30 days, you are comfortable understanding and speaking your new language." Such statements have driven me up in the journalistic wall in the past. Yet, in spite of my lamentations, it seems that hope springs eternal in the minds of those flogging language courses; because of this every so often I have to set the record straight. As my readers know, I am the last person who would attempt to discourage anybody from learning a language. My nomadic existence in my younger days added five more languages to the three basic ones I started out with and, while living in so many places may have had its drawbacks at times, the linguistic bonus that it bestowed on me is literally priceless. However, if you are not to get mired down in frustration by your efforts to learn a foreign language, I think it should be made in 'trough'? 'Throe' as in 'though'? 'Thrup' as in 'hiccough'? or is it 'thraow' as in 'bough'? No, as a matter of fact it's 'throo' as in 'through'. In the labryinthine logic of English, we lie in a bed, but lay an egg. A song is sung, but a criminal is hanged. And we don't pronounce the 'p' in pneumonia, the 'd' in Wednesday, or the entire middle of words like Worcester and Leicester. Or, for that matter, the 'gh' in 'through'. 'Ch' is pronounced one way in 'character' another way in 'charter'. Same with the letter 'g' in 'general' and 'gun'. I'm glad I was born into an English- speaking family — I don't think I ever could have learned it from a book. Especially if the book contained 'Janus' words. Are you familiar with Mister Janus? He was a God the Romans honoured a couple of thousand years ago. Janus was Heaven's doorman as far as they were concerned, and when they built statues of him, the Romans gave Janus two faces: one facing forwards, the other astern. That's where the concept of Janus words comes from. They too, have two faces, or meanings — and they face 180 degrees away from each other. Take the word 'cleave'. A loving couple clear that, in spite of what the ads say, there is no royal/short road when it comes to learning a language not native to you. If you are really comfortable, as the ad says, in speaking and understanding a language after 30 days, I'll climb the Matterhorn. Ask any of those who have immigrated to Canada how long it took to feel comfortable in English and I'll bet it was much more than 30 days. English has this horrible habit of spelling words one way and saying them another. It has any number of words which sound the same, but have totally different meanings, not to mention sounds which exist in very few other languages. This is enough to give one an inferior complex for a decade. Every other language has its own roadblocks. German has a word order that defies logic; Russian has case endings that would defeat Julius Caesar while the Romance languages, such as French, Italian and Portuguese, all have complicated uses of the subjective form of the verb, something that has all but died out in English. Asking a person to get on top of things like this is just asking too much. The ad would have one believe that, not only are you going to feel comfortable with a foreign language after such a short while, but you are going to be able to make speeches to educated business associates, such speeches to be pivotal in concluding a business transaction, etc. Let me tell you my experience when I go to Switzerland. Most of the people I deal with in that country speak English and have for years. But what happens when We get down to the details? Most of the German Swiss prefer to speak to me in German; all the French and Italian Swiss waste no time in using their own language. The few that like to use English invariably mix in German words now and again just to be sure can cleave to one =other. But an ax can cleave a chunk of firewood. Thus, 'cleave' means to stick together and to split apart. Go figure. How about the word 'sanction'? The government sanctions the use of seatbelts in cars, but it also employs sanctions against South Africa. So 'sanction' means to endorse and/or condemn. Huh? Similarly, 'fast' can mean speedy or it can mean immobile. You can run fast or be stuck fast in the mud. You can 'dust' a crop in a field (pour crud on to it) or you can 'dust' the living room table (wipe crud off it). The word 'left' can be used to mean departed or still remaining. (He left this morning. There's one cupcake left.) 'Overlook' can be taken to mean inspect or ignore, 'buckle' can mean to wilt or to tie together. Can someone please tell me how any mere human being can be expected to make sense of a language that features Janus words — words that can have exactly opposite interpretations? Like the word 'conservative'. My dictionary says it comes from the word 'conserve' meaning to preserve and protect (the countryside). So how does that explain Brian Mulroney? they have used the right word in English. If they have not, I tell them the word they should have used. The only exception to all this is a banker friend in Zurich who has lived in Canada for many years. When we first met, we used English because there always seemed to be somebody present who did not speak German. Now we have gotten so used to English that we constantly use it. Each of us is confident that the other knows what he is talking about. In short I would like to meet one of these 30 day wonders just to see how fluent he or she is. By all means learn a foreign language or even more than one. Just remember that it will not come in 30 days or anything approaching that. However, when it does come, you will be delighted at your accomplishment. There is an. old saying that learning a new language opens 1,000 doors. How true it is! Letter THE EDITOR, One of the tributes missed for Jack Bryans was his desire and success in getting a new school in Walton. Jack engineered it so Gordon McGavin would buy 12 acres from Ernie Stevens and overnight trade this land on the old schools. The government had put a freeze on school building but if you already had the land you could go ahead. The rest is history and many people now agree it was a great idea and a great school. Thank you Jack Bryans. It was a pleasure to know and have you in our community. Neil McGavin. The Short of it By Bonnie Gropp A doctor with huma'nity I have this image of the old country doctor. They didn't whine about being roused from their sleep to tend to a sick child, nor complain about fighting their way down a country road in a winter blast. They were never too busy for someone ill and no one was too poor to receive help. It sure is a different world now, isn't it? Angered by the 10 per cent clawback on their earnings, which Ontario's doctors say would force them to provide millions of dollars of free services this year, they have threatened to refuse new patients. The issue inspired the Tories to discuss high-level money with the doctors. Nurses, who earn an everage annual salary of $43,600 a year to a doctor's $180,000, are • being laid off by the thousands. Doctors on the other hand have zero unemployment. Hospital closures and a reduction in many health services areas to save costs, make the issue seem a bit like the fat cat trying to steal all the cream. It all also makes it rather difficult to feel too sorry for them. I truly do believe that good doctors earn every penny they make. I do see the frustration in having someone else controlling the amount of money I could make. However being a good doctor goes beyond a knowledge of the profession. It is above all, using that knowledge, that talent, to help others at no small sacrifice to themselves. Real doctors, good doctors I don't believe, enter the field of medicine for the money, and they're well aware that it will be much more than a 9-5, five- day-a-week career. They are tireless and compassionate. Perhaps my ideology is an unfair one, but it is one that I feel fortunate to have based on experience. Our family practioner when I was a child, was the stereotypical house call doctor. Kind and gentle; Dr. Earl's presence was often remedy enough for a patient in our home. A phone call brought him almost immediately to the house and the time he would spend was unhurried, while his caring demeanor and tenderness soothed many minor ills. Doctors like him were often taken advantage of. They were undoubtedly a special breed and while many of today's may share his compassion or even have greater practical skills, it is unlikely they would make even half the sacrifices. Then there's Dr. Jim Withers. An internist and teaching physician in Pittsburgh. He gets top marks for, if not bedside manner, than curbside. For over three years Withers has led a team of two dozen doctors, who three or four nights a week administer to the needs of the homeless in the city. They don't stop at tending to their medical needs either, but provide them with food and clothing. Colleagues say Withers has gone out in sub-zero temperatures for several nights in a row without complaint. He picks maggots out of open sores and clips the nails on fetid toes. His patients say he gives them dignity. Withers says treating them is a way of getting back the humanity he lost after graduation. Arthur Black International Scene By Raymond Canon