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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 1995-05-03, Page 5THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, MAY 3, 1995. PAGE 5. Arthur Black Next time there's a war let's not pay The Army spent $2 billion for fly swatters to send to Alaska. When the fly swatters got up there they found there wasn't no flies in Alaska. So the Army spent $4 billion more to raise flies to ship to Alaska so's they could use them fly swatters! That's how the Army works, son! Senator Claghorn And that's a joke, son — but only just. You may recall that a couple of years ago, reporters discovered the Pentagon had paid a vendor $600 apiece for airline toilet seat covers (Street price: $25). The jarhead geniuses had also laid out $7,662 for a coffee maker, $400 for a hammer and $659.53 for an ashtray. Not that the military mind operates any more brilliantly north of the border. Back in 1987, then-Canadian Defence Minister Jean- Jacques Blais, announced that the Canadian Armed Forces would be issued with M-16 rifles at a cost of $1,314 each. Now, at the time, an average street psychopath could walk into any Guns 'R Us store in the U.S. and pick up the same heater for less than $700. Reason for the uh, discrepancy? Stay at home Frankly I think that this year you might consider taking a holiday in some part of Canada instead of going off to the United States or to certain countries in Europe. What has happened to the exchange rate on our dollar since a year ago is little short of obscene and, if there is one rule you should remember, it is that every time the Canadian dollar falls in value in relationship to a foreign currency, the cost of taking a trip to that country goes up for Canadians. Let me give you an example. Last June when I was in Switzerland, the exchange rate was approx. 92 cents Canadian for a Swiss franc. This meant that, if I found a hotel room for 70 Swiss francs, it would, in terms of our currency, cost about $65. Right now the exchange rate for the same currency is $1.25. This means that the same hotel room with the same wonderful view and the same fresh air costs you about $88, a jump of $23 in a single year. Even filthy rich journalists such as I would feel the jolt. Germany isn't any better. At the present time if you were travelling about that country in a rented car, the gas you put into your tank would set you back about $1.40 - $1.50 a litre, depending on where you buy it. A Big Mac would cost about $5. When you read about more and more American tourists coming to Canada these days, that should tell you something. The message is that there are many more bargains to be found in Canada and, for Canadians, fewer and fewer of such bargains to be found south of the border. I was recently in the U.S. and, with an hour or so to kill, decided to wander up and down the rows of a supermarket. I had my pocket calculator in my hand and anybody watching me must have thought that I was a "Royalties" said the Defence Minister. How about bone-head stupidity, Mister Blais? But then that, too, is a Canadian military tradition. It was just one year later that Perrin Beatty, in his incarnation as Canadian Defence Minister, was pushing a plan to spend $8 billion on a fleet of nuclear submarines to keep Canada's Arctic free from the Commie Menace. Fortunately the Evil Empire vaporized itself before Ottawa had to figure out a way to winkle an extra $8 billion out of the back pockets of Canadian taxpayers. Makes you wonder, though. If our military leaders can't mobilize the brainpower required to run a corner candy store, how are they going to win a war? Maybe it's the old Too Many Chiefs, Not Enough Indians syndronie. Last winter the news leaked out that 19 Canadian generals flew to Florida for "business" and socializing with American brass. Nineteen generals? For a country with an army smaller than Portugal's? Was there anybody left holding the fort back home? Oh, yes. Canada could well afford to dispatch a dozen and a half Brass Hats to frolic in the Florida surf. After all, there were still more than 50 of them tripping over their swagger sticks here at home. Read it and weep, Canucks — the Canadian Armed Forces stagger along under the weight of 93 comparison shopper from another chain. At any rate I found few items that were worth the while buying to save any money. Butter was on sale for about 70 cents a pound cheaper than here but that alone is not enough to make anybody jump for joy. Gasoline is something of a bargain, but not as much as you might think when you consider the amount you consume and the toll both ways in getting there. If you want to point a finger of blame for all this, start by directing it at the Americans. The American dollar has been taking a pounding lately because of the failure of (1) Washington to show that it is getting its federal budget deficit under control, (2) the continuing desire of the Americans to buy more goods from foreign countries than they sell to them and (3) the suspicion that the American dollar in general is no longer the important reserve currency it was. - If the current is flowing strongly one way, it is hard to swim against it. We have an economy that is so tied to the fortunes of the American ones that we, in spite of any intentions to the contrary, are forced to go along with it. This is such a strong assumption on the part of foreign money managers that they, rightly or wrongly, automatically lump the Canadian dollar in any assumptions they have on the American one. Thus, if the sign of the times is thumbs down on the U.S. dollar, down we go along with it. For years I have been telling anybody who would listen that this country has to diversify in its trade patterns, but who listens to me? Because of all this I get back to my original argument that this is a good time to take a holiday in Canada. My son and family, not wanting to offend the guru of the Canon family, have opted for Alberta and British Columbia; my wife is headed for Nova Scotia for a family reunion or so. I would suggest that you might like to go to Quebec; the majority of people there are generals and admirals — not to mention 295 colonels and navy captains. This in a country in which the total airforce consists of just 300 planes. Where the navy runs fewer submarines than the West Edmonton Mall. A little top-heavy, officer-wise, eh wot? Our current Defense Minister, David Collenette, has promised to "trim" the ranks. He says that over the next three years, the number of generals and admirals will be reduced from 93 to 70. Fifty colonels and navy captains will be de-mobbed reducing the total from 295 to 245. Which is a start...but when you hear that Bell Canada plans to axe 10,000 jobs and the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation intends to deep-six more than 30 per cent of its employees ... it's tough to shed a tear for the generals and the admirals. Somebody once described the Pentagon as a log drifting down the river with 25,000 ants on it, each one convinced he was in charge. Sounds like a fair description of the Canadian Armed Forces — with figures suitably adjusted for deflation, of course. The poet Carl Sandburg once wrote "Sometime they'll give a war, and nobody will come." Maybe we can short-circuit that. Maybe the next time somebody gives a war, we can simply refuse to pay. not raving separatists and are among the most hospitable in Canada. Also, when I was out in Saskatchewan I was amazed at the number of things that the province had to offer. Even the flat landscape is something of a novelty and it is not as flat as you might suspect. If you don't want to wander so far afield, take in a play or two at Blyth, Grand Bend or one of the other excellent small theatres in this part ,of Ontario. Take a trip along Highway 3 from St. Thomas to Windsor through such places as Leamington and Kingsville and see what a pleasant change it is from 401. My wife and I have been known to stop off in such places as Kincardine and do some shopping along the main street. 1995 might just turn out to be a banner year for you in your holiday activities. Looking back through the years Continued from page 4 hers were Bryan Bell, Andy Uyl, Bill Bearss and John Verwey. The Blyth Scouts, Cubs and Venturers spent an afternoon planting trees on the property of Phil Garriock, near Auburn, for the Trees for Canada program. Becky Rapson and Crystal Semple took first and third for their duet, at the Stratford Kiwanis Music Festival. Three ensembles took first place as well: the SSA (soprano, soprano, alto), SA girls and SSA unconducted. The Short of it By Bonnie Gropp Time to share a 50 year memory "It's something you try not to remember and something you never forget." The great wars are not events anyone involved wants to think about, but this Monday as we mark the 50th anniversary of VE-Day Canadians should relive with pride the role they played towards this end. Canada has become a nation recognized for its peace keeping, but on May 8 we will be remembered for much more than that, particularly by our Dutch friends. What took place in the months before that day formed a bond, which is still unbroken 50 years later. In September of 1944, American troops began the Liberation of Holland. While Britain played an important part in liberating south Holland, an unsuccessful airborne assault on Arnhem prevented the liberation of the rest of Holland. The First Canadian Army, on the north end of the allied lines, cleared the Dutch approaches to the key Belgian port of Antwerp by November. In mid-March of 1945, more Canadian troops arrived to replace 1 British Corps. They pushed the Germans into West Netherlands and Germany, then when hostilities stopped in early May it was up to the Canadians to liberate West Holland, including the major cities of Amsterdam, Rotterdam and the capital, The Hague. Relief supplies were quickly sent into this area, which had suffered through an extremely miserable winter. For the Dutch people, after years of living in fear and uncertainty, it was freedom. The restraints of German occupation were finally loosened and they met the Canadian soldiers with enthusiasm and joy. Historians reflect that that "Canadian summer" forged a bond of long-lasting friendship between the two countries. I recall, even as a very small child, hearing that Canadians were liked, respected and admired by the Dutch people for efforts they had made during the war. I remember feeling something then, which I recognize now as pride, for the men who had earned this friendship. My feelings towards war were altered in later years, however. Growing up next door to the turmoil rooted in our southern neighbour's involvement with the Vietnamese War, I developed a pacific overview. As an impressionable teen, war represented to me a lunacy with no explanation, a senseless waste of the young and a negative example to a generation, which at that time, vehemently opposed power and eschewed materialistic values. Surrounded by the controversy, the sadness that was the Vietnam era, I spoke vitriolic criticisms of any war as a solution to any issue. The pride I felt as a youngster in being Canadian, has always been there; the first reason I felt it, however, has not. In my idealistic naivete, I could take no pride from fighting. I'm a big girl now, though. I still think Vietnam was a mistake. I can still be a bit of a fanatical pacifist. But I know that sometimes, unfortunately, we must fight. Canadians have a lot to be proud of, especially their efforts to end the war. On Monday a countdown is being done at noon on radio and television. Church bells will chime, sirens will blow and car horns will honk. Join in this celebration to honour and remember the fight for peace and democracy made by these brave Canadians 50 years ago. International Scene