HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 1995-03-29, Page 5Arthur Black
THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, MARCH 29, 1995. PAGE 5
Travel glamorous
only in retrospect
Travel is glamorous only in retrospect
Paul Theroux
I have paid as much as $300 a night to
throw up in a sink shaped like a seashell.
Erma Bombeck
Ah, the joy of gallivanting around the
globe - it ain't always quite the way they tell
it in those full-colour brochures the travel
agents lavish on you.
As a frequent flyer who has eaten enough
airline meals to qualify as a Hazardous
Waste Site, I can testify that the romance of
Jetting Away From It All is highly
overrated. As a sensual experience, living
out of a suitcase palls after 48 hours and
there's not a hotel bed in the world that's as
soft and forgiving as the one you've got at
home.
Of course, there's your average tedious,
pain in the butt type travel and then there's
NIGHTMARE travel.
Each year the folks at Thrifty Car Rental
sponsor a Worst Travel Nightmares Contest.
Contestants are invited to send in the most
wretched experience they'd experienced as a
tourist.
This year's winners have been announced
and the runnerup spot in the Misery
South of the border,
down Mexico way
The last time I crossed the border into a
Spanish speaking country, it was at San
Diego. I had some business to do in Tijuana
and, not wanting to drive my car across and
sit in a traffic line-up for hours, I parked
close to the border, walked across and took a
taxi. The driver was very friendly, all the
more so when he discovered that I spoke
Spanish.
When we got to my destination, he asked
when I was going back. He was delighted
when I told him that it would only be a few
hours; he said to go to a specific taxi stand
and ask for Ramon.
"How nice," I replied, "That is my name
too."
That made his day; we were, he said,
brothers. Need I tell you what sort of a
pleasant trip I got on the way back to the
border.
One thing that came up in the conversation
was that, if I wanted, I could travel south all
the way to the southern tip of South America
and I would have to speak nothing but
Spanish all the way. Come to think of it,
there are very few places in the world that
you can travel so far on one language and,
while the accent may change from country to
country, you will have no trouble making
yourself understood if you take the trouble to,
learn the language.
Even Prime Minister Chretien tried a few
words of it during his recent visit there to
drum up business for Canadian firms. Some
of you who read my column may recall that I
suggested that, shortly after he came back
from the Far East, he should consider taking
a trip down there to do the same thing he had
s weepstakes goes to Ben Goldberg of
Madison, Alabama. Ben had his rental car
vandalized while he sunned himself on a
Florida beach. Most of his belongings were
stolen. But not all.
Later that afternoon Mister Goldberg
attempted to board a homebound airplane at
Miami airport.
His attempt would have gone a lot better if
Mister Goldberg hadn't been dressed in a
tweed jacket, a bathing suit and no shoes.
Or if he'd had a ticket.
Alas, Mister Goldberg was taken for an
exhibitionist/hijacker, tackled, handcuffed
and held at gunpoint.
But David Gray wins first prize in the
Thrifty Nightmare Travel Contest. Last year
on a whim, Mister Gray rented a fire-engine
red Thunderbird convertible in Seattle. He
was having a grand time, tooling with the
top down along the coastal highway.
Right until the squad of police cruisers
surrounded him.
Officers leaned out of the passenger
window of each cruiser, sporting a twelve-
gauge shotgun pointed at the barren patch
between David Gray's eyebrows.
Turned out that a 'computer glitch' had
tagged Gray as the prime suspect in the theft
of a red T-Bird which had occurred back in
1989.
The glitch was eventually found, the
flatfoot Rambos backed off, and David Gray
was released.
Just in time to miss his flight back to Los
Angeles.
been trying to do in China, Indonesia, etc. -
expand Canadian markets. Hardly had a
copy of my article reached Ottawa when he
announced that he would, indeed, be on his
way. Who says that politicians don't listen.
One thing that many of those Spanish
speaking countries need is our expertise in
resource development. I could mention Chile
as a prime example but almost any Latin
American country has resources that are
sitting in the ground waiting to be extracted.
This fact has not been lost on a number of
Canadian companies; investment in Chile's
resources by Canada is already in the $5
billion range.
Another thing that we have in our favour
is the simple fact that we are not the United
States. Our population is far closer to that of
most South American countries and we are
also not seen as a big bully, a trait that the
Americans seem frequently to be tarred with.
Far too often the image that many South
Americans have of Uncle Sam is one of a
country which will run roughshod over any
American country, north, south or central,
that gets in its way. This may not always be
the case but it does happen often enough and
Canadians can attest to that.
Given that we have apparently feW, if any,
axes to grind in this part of the world, our
presence in the Latin speaking part of the
two continents is a welcome one and we
would be wise not to ignore it.
While we do compete directly with the
products of some of the Latin American
countries, by and large they have many
products that we can use and there is no
reason why a thriving two-way trade pattern
cannot emerge.
If this is to be the case, we will have to do
something about it in addition to expressing
sincere intentions. One important step would
be to encourage the study of Spanish in our
schools and universities. Frankly it is not a
hard language to learn; since it is akin to
French and Italian, about half its words are
Tragic tales, yes - but nothing to compare
to the sad saga of a nomad by the name of
Nicholas Scotti. One day Mister Scotti
decided to fly from his home in San
Francisco back to his native Italy to visit
relatives. When the plane touched down,
Mister Scotti disembarked. Alas, his
nephews were not there to meet him as
promised. Kids these days. Still, perhaps it
was just the infamous Roman traffic that
held them up.
Mister Scotti decided to track them down
himself. Ah, how Rome had changed! All
these modern buildings! Why, hardly any of
the city's ancient landmarks were left!
And the street signs - why were they in
English? Was the Yankee tourist dollar so
important to Italians nowadays? After all,
Mister Scotti couldn't help noticing that most
of the people he talked to spoke English -
and with an American accent, yet.
It wasn't until Mister Scotti had spent a
day and a night on the city subway that a
sympathetic cop explained the problem.
Mister Scotti was not in Rome. He was not
even in Europe.
He had spent two days wandering around
New York city.
A trouper to the end, Mister Scotti refused
to believe it. Even when he was placed in a
police cruiser and raced back to the airport,
sirens wailing, to catch a flight back to his
native San Francisco, Mister Scotti whacked
himself in the chest triumphantly and cried.
"You see? Now I know I'm in Italy. This is
how they drive."
similar to the ones which are used in
English.
I cannot say it often enough; the more we
depend, as we do now, on trade with the
United States for our prosperity, the more
we are going to have to follow their
economic cycle and the more ours will be
made in Washington and not in Ottawa. We
seem to be starting to learn our lesson about
the folly of running huge federal budgetary
deficits; how long will it take before we
recognize the equal folly of depending so
much on one country for our prosperity?
Letter to the editor
Continued from page 4
and Morris started the Belgrave School Fair.
Now 75 years later the Belgrave, Blyth,
Brussels School Fair is only one of two
remaining in the province. With the pride of
the communities in their schools, support
from local businesses and an endless number
of volunteers over the years, the fair
continues.
To mark the 75th anniversary of the fair
numerous celebrations have been planned.
These celebrations begin with a kick-off
variety concert at the Belgrave arena on May
26 at 8 p.m. The fair itself will be held on
Friday, Sept. 15 with a parade, showing of
exhibits, games, a barbecue and a family
dance in the arena.
Another part of the variety night and fair
will be a display of pictures and memorabilia
from 75 years of the school fair. Anyone
wishing to share their pictures of past fairs
and would like them displayed at the variety
night and at the fair please send them to the
address below. (Please have names and dates
on them if possible).
The 75th School Fair committee is inviting
all former students and teachers to come and
celebrate this milestone. Spread the word.
Come and remember the fair.
Thank you,
Keith Elston
RR 4, Wingham.
The
short
of it
By Bonnie Gropp
What do you want
those memories to be?
There is nothing more humbling than
screwing up. You can tell yourself a million
times that to err is human but knowing that
you've made a mistake tends to bring you
down a notch, whether you need to or not.
Most times the humiliation of being
reminded we are less than perfect is a private
matter, but there are, unfortunately,
occasions when we are not only forced to
see this flaw, but are chastised for being all
too human.
The other day, while feeling a little
overwhelmed by my own humility, my son
came to my rescue with the ingenuousness
of youth. Nobody deserves to be yelled at for
a mistake, he said, because they don't mean
to make them.
Words to live by •if I've ever heard them,
but unfortunately, not many of us choose to.
And interestingly enough, I realized upon
reflection, that I have not even afforded the
sayer of that common sense logic the same
respect.
How many times have I snapped at one of
my children unnecessarily? How many
times have I compounded a small
transgression on their part, by making the
mistake of reacting in anger?
Forgiveness, acceptance and un-
derstanding are traits of which we are all
capable, yet seem at times to be the ones we
use most infrequently. While we are often
ready to chastise, argue or holler, we don't
seem quite as quick to give credit where
credit is due. Though we think nothing of
telling someone when they are wrong, we
frequently refrain from telling them when
we approve. No news is good news, right?
It was with pleasure I attended a meeting
last week, where the speaker, Dr. Ron
Hanson, talked about surviving and thriving
on-the family farm. His message, though
delivered to a specific group, was applicable
to every family I've ever known. He spoke
largely on relationships, on feelings, and the
importance of improving communication.
An entertaining speaker, Dr. Hanson didn't
tell anyone in the audience anything they
didn't know, but rather reminded them of
what they had forgotten they knew. While
people seem to need little incentive to yell at
a spouse, child or sibling, they are not as
likely to tell that same person that they need
them, are proud of them, or appreciate them.
Learning to appreciate people, to respect
them for who they are and not try to make
them who we think they should be was not
exactly an enlightening suggestion, but more
one of affirmation.
Lately it seems our world has become one
in which we are too ready to assume the
worst of each other. We imagine personal
vendettas behind mistakes, catastrophes out
of little problems, and slights where none
were intended. We are ready to strike before
we consider the motivation and more
interestingly, forget at times to give the
respect we expect.
Last weekend, I received a phone call
from a woman that meant more to me than
she could have imagined. She took the time
and made the effort to give me a pat on the
back, something we all think of doing, we
talk about doing, but usually put off until it's
too late. Her thoughtfulness and kindness
re-affirmed my faith in people.
And while she reminded me of how it
feels to be on the receiving end, I'm grateful
to Dr. Hanson for hinting that it is better to
give than to receive. As he said the time will
come when all there will be is memories.
What do you want those memories to be?
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