HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 1994-10-26, Page 5I:H
Arthur Black
THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, OCTOBER 26, 1994. PAGE 5.
The
This horse
still has
some life
I hate to flog a dead horse, but this one
still has some life in it. It’s hitched to a
bandwagon called Political Correctness.
You know Political Correctness. That's
where other people tell you what it's okay
for you to think or say or do.
It is Not Politically Correct for instance, to
speak, as the author of Snow White did, of
the Three Ugly Sisters.
To be Politically Correct, they are to be
referred to as the Three Cosmetically
Challenged Sisters.
I'm not making this up. A New York high
school recently cancelled a production of
Peter Pan because references - "redskin",
"squaw" etcetera - were offensive to native
Americans.
In New York1?
Similarly, Golden Books, the largest
publisher of fairy tales on this continent, has
created a non-violent version of that classic
fairy tale, The Three Little Pigs.
In the Golden Books rewrite, instead of
falling into a pot of boiling water, the wolf
sleeps outside, exhausted from huffing and
puffing, and the pigs build a jail around him.
After all, the wolf is an endangered
species you know.
The PC madness is everywhere. Two-
^International Scene
Great quantities
of gall
When I was a young student struggling
with Latin, I learned quite a few famous
statements which are attributed to famous
men of classical times. For a while when I
was out making speeches, I used to insert
one or two of them as a means of indicating
that, whatever I might say in the course of
the speech, I still had what might be called a
classical education.
I was pulled aside by someone after one
speech and told to cool it. Most people he
pointed out, not only had not studied Latin
and, of those that did, few liked it. I would
be better off, he concluded, to make my
quotes in English.
Ceteris paribus, he was probably right.
However, having sneaked in a short
expression, I am now going to use one in
English that was attributed to Julius Caesar.
All Gaul, he intoned, is divided into four
parts. Gaul being the word at that time for
France, it has been used on numerous
occasions for leaders of that country with the
spelling being changed to gall to give it a
more modem meaning.
If I remember correctly, Gen. Charles
DcGaulle, leader of the Free French forces
during the Second World War, was said to
have enough gall for more than four parts; at
least that is what Winston Churchill thought,
but a recent event in France has provided
ample proof that gall is still not in short
supply in that country.
The French airline, Air France, may look
nice on the outside but financially it is a
bust. It has something approaching
monopoly power in France and is, in effect,
still owned by the French government.
thirds of British children's authors report that
they have been censored on the grounds of
Political Incorrectness. One author was
asked by his publisher to remove a scene
involving a grassy lawn on the grounds that
many children do not have gardens.
In Iowa last fall, students were advised not
to wear certain costumes for trick or treating
on Halloween.
Gypsy, Native American princess,
African, witch, elderly person, disabled
person, East Indian, and hobo were
specifically to be avoided for fear of
offending the groups therein depicted.
Which leaves - what? Pumpkin costumes?
Only until the Society For the Empowerment
of Large Orange Vegetables forms a protest
group.
Toronto has, of course, jumped on the
Politically Correct bandwagon. A few
months ago, city council voted to change the
wording to O Canada.
For the 16th (count 'em) time.
Henceforth, when somebody warbles O
Canada before a Blue Jay home game the
worlds will be changed from "our home and
native land" to "our home and cherished
land".
"True patriot love in all thy sons
command" will become "true patriot love in
all of us command."
Seems some of the Toronto councillors
found the song lyrics confusing. "I came to
this country in 1966 and I've had to pretend I
was a man and a native," groused Councillor
Ila Bossons.
By Raymond Canon
According to the rules of the European
Economic Community, such airlines had to
learn to run on their own and not, in an
increasingly competitive world, keep
running to the government for handouts. All
very well but it takes some gall to exceed the
decision by the EEC's trust-busting outfit to
permit the French government to hand over
about $5 billion to Air France to keep the
airline flying.
Of course there were the usual conditions
attached that were, it is claimed, designed to
get the company back into the black within
three years. Most of them are nothing less
than window-dressing such as reducing the
bloated work-force by 5,000 which would
have had to take place anyway. In addition it
will have to pay back a previous 1.5 billion
dollar loan but the money to do this will
come from the 5 billion loan mentioned
above.
All this comes at a time when one of Air
France's chief competitors, British Airways,
is expected to fly subsidy-free. In spite of
this the Commission has the additional gall
to say that the handout to Air France is
completely "in conformity with the law."
Really?
The gall does not stop there. Recent cases
of fraud within the European Economic
Community have cost taxpayers the better
part of a billion dollars. One of the biggest
examples is the $200 million paid out to
train Portuguese and Italians on data-
processing equipment. However, the courses
have never been taught and the equipment to
teach them has never been seen.
IRA terrorists are not the only ones
slipping across the border between Northern
Ireland and the Irish Republic. Sheep are
regularly herded back and forth from one
part of Ireland to the other so that the EEC's
subsidy premiums can be collected twice or
more instead of the normal once.
Italy, which seems to play the game with
Poor thing. I trust she wears a name tag
and her mother still pins her mittens to her
coat sleeves.
It's worse than that. Let me introduce you
to Frank Balun. Frank's a 69-year-old
grandfather who's retired and likes to work
in his backyard garden down in Hillside,
New Jersey. One day Frank discovered that
a rat was eating his tomatoes. He did the
sensible thing: he trapped it in a squirrel
cage, killed it with a broomstick then called
the Humane Society to come and take the
carcass away.
The animal control officer responded by
smacking Frank with two summons, and the
threat of a six-month jail term and/or a fine
of up to $1,500.
Frank Balun was accused of "animal
abuse". The officer maintained that the rat
"deserved a humane method of euthanasia."
Fortunately they're not all loony down in
Hillside, New Jersey. The public flocked to
Mister Balun's defence. The head of the
local health board said he deserved a medal,
not a trial. "We encourage people to kill rats
because they carry disease" he said.
The charges were dropped, but Frank
Balun's still steamed. "I want to have my day
in court" he says. "I want people to know
that this man (the animal control official)
abuses authority and should be curbed."
Amen, Mister Balun. I hope you get your
chance to haul this meddling pea-brain in
front of a judge.
What's more, I hope the judge clobbers the
rat.
as much flair as any other member country,
has managed to siphon off about $75 million
by pretending that 90 per cent of its olive oil
in storage was high quality when it was
anything but. Perhaps the most complicated
diddle saw Polish cattle, which had been
shipped to Italy for slaughter, were then sent
on to Malta and then back to Italy from
where they were then exported from EEC
territory; this one cost taxpayers about $70
million.
According to one criminologist, who has
been studying this type of gall, oops, fraud
for a number of years, the total cost of all
this activity to the taxpayer is no less than
$10 billion. All this puts Canadians into the
sainthood category where we will probably
stay since the powers-that-be are showing no
tendency to come to grips with such a
colossal waste of money.
Gall, it seems, can be comfortably divided
among all the member nations and, as long
as each one gets what it considers to be its
share, nobody is going to complain too
much.
Letter to editor
Continued from page 4
CMHA/Huron is also willing to train people
on the computer and office equipment.
We are looking for someone who enjoys
helping people to volunteer for the Monday
night Step Forward program. This program
provides social interaction and activities for
adults with menial health difficulties.
Activities like movie nights, walks, trips
around the community, swimming and more
give the members a chance to get together
for fun and friendship.
Volunteering is a great way to give back to
the community and help oneself at the same
time. If you are looking for something to do
or would like to expand your work
experience, call 482-9311 and become a
volunteer.
Jodi Jerome
Short
of it
By Bonnie Gropp
Fun for all ages
It's Halloween, the lamp is lit
Around the fire, we children sit
Atelling ghost tales bit by bit
Till sister Jane says, "Hush”.
Being frightened at Halloween is a big
part of the fun, so I guess as a youngster I
probably had a blast. I'm not a particularly
brave soul and I do recall on several
Halloweens being absolutely terrified by the
scary creatures that seemed to suddenly
abound in my safe haven.
As I got a little older, however, I did catch
on to how much fun it can be to spook and
be spooked.
When I was growing up Halloween was
definitely not a grownup party. Perhaps as a
toddler, my parents took me door to door,
but for as long as I can remember Oct. 31
was always kids' night out. Parents were
just not allowed. My friends and I would
plan for weeks what we were wearing,
which was usually a costume thrown
together inexpensively from whatever odds
and sods we could find at home. Then in
groups of three or four we would wend our
way throughout the entire town knocking on
every door of every house with a light turned
on.
Then I reached high school age, when
somehow it was made clear that trick or
treating was no longer a cute thing and
begging for treats just wasn't cool anymore.
What did become cool was the tricking part,
but fortunately my timid nature precluded
too much participation in this Halloween
past time from me, though in all honesty I
must admit to a certain lapse at the age of
15, when a friend and I decided to give the
window soaping thing a try. We snuck out of
our homes and true to our luck got caught by
the owners of the first place we hit.
That pretty much ended my Halloween fun
until as a young mother I dressed my own
little ones in costume and took them out so
people could see how cute they were and I
could have a share of the booty.
Now those days, too have ended and I
have mixed feelings about it. Halloween is
not what it used to be. The days of young
children going out on their own are over as
are the days of wandering randomly from
house to house. Whereas the dangers of my
Halloween were primarly in my imagination,
today the dangers are all too real.
Rather than going it alone as soon as they
can find their way around, and hitting all the
houses in the hopes of bringing home as
much junk as possible, small children are
accompanied now by an adult and all
children are reminded to visit only the
houses of people they know. Treats come
home first to be inspected before ingested.
To end their children's evening of fun,
parents carefully check for razor blades or
pins and look suspiciously at homemade
treats.
Tricking, too, is a little more sinister than
my sudsy attempts, with fires started,
windows broken and other acts of vandalism
prevalent. Youngsters are urged to begin and
end their evening early, to be safely home
when the rabble rousers come out.
There does seem to be a positive side,
though. Whereas the generation before mine
pretty much left it to the kids, parents today
decorate, dressup and get into the spooky
spirit. Though they have alerted their little
ones to potential dangers, many adults have
played up the fun and, it seems, are enjoying
being part of it.