HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 1994-01-05, Page 5r
[Arthur Black
THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 5, 1994. PAGE 5.
Permafrost —a
vintage Canadian
concept
Permafrost n.: subsoil and rock that
remains below zero degrees centigrade
for longer than one year, usually
beneath a layer of thawing topsoil.
Colombo's Canadian References
Permafrost. Now there's a vintage
Canadian concept for you. California doesn't
have permafrost. Residents of South
America, Africa and Australia wouldn't
know permafrost if they stubbed a surfboard
on it. But here in Canada the stuff runs like
an icy underground blanket all across the Far
North tundra, and sporadically through all
the mainland provinces with the exception of
the Maritimes.
If you're a farmer, a roadbuilder or an
architect, you don't have a whole lot of use
for permafrost. It's fine as long as it's
undisturbed, but try to drive a road through
permafrost or gnaw out a subbasement, and
you've got problems.
Not surprisingly, permafrost thaws when
exposed to air. And what was once an iron-
hard surface turns into a slurpy, fudge-like
gumbo that can swallow rubber boots,
Caterpillar tractors and even whole houses
r
International Scene
Debt, debt
and
more debt
My dictionary tells me that the world 'debt'
comes from the Old French world 'debte';
the modem word in that language is "dette."
At any rate, the French, and everybody else
for that matter, are up to their proverbial
eyeballs in debt; a sad state of affairs since
the same countries that owe money all over
the place also have high rates of unemploy
ment but, like a family who has started using
credit cards as a way of life and then learned
to regret it, there is little that can be done in
the near term to alleviate this deplorable
situation. All the money that would normally
be used is now paying the interest on this
colossal debt.
This sounds remarkably like the current
situation in Canada and it is. However, we
can take some consolation in the fact that
other countries are having as much trouble
coming to grips with the situation as we are
and nowhere more so than in Belgium
where, on a per capita basis, they have close
to twice as much as we do. We are Number
Five on the black list and between us and the
Belgians are to be found Italy, Ireland and
Greece. Just below us are Holland, Japan,
Sweden and Denmark, followed by the
United States.
An easy way to measure this debt for
readers who are not up to date on the current
economic jargon on the subject is to measure
the debt as a percentage of the total amount
of spending which goes on in a country in
any given year. The Belgians are at 140 per
cent of this level of spending while the
Italians are just under 120 per cent. These
are the only two countries in triple figures.
Where is Canada, you ask? We are just over
75 per cent but not slowing down one iota,
certainly not according to the figure released
earlier this year.
Anyway, back to the Belgians. What are
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like some primeval swamp monster.
Permafrost is one of the reasons it's so
hard to keep a highway in the Far North.
Each summer whole sections of road bed
simply disappear into the ooze.
Permafrost dictates that government
buildings "north of Sixty" sit on stilts, that
oil pipelines snake across the surface of
land, not buried the way they are down
south.
And needless to say, you're not going to
have banana plantations, com crops or even
apple trees on turf where a wall of solid ice
lurks just a foot or so below the lichens.
Still, our Northerners are ingenious by
nature. They spend their lives figuring out
ways to make use of resources the rest of us
would turn our backs on or toss in a landfill
site. So naturally you just knew some
enterprising opportunist would figure out a
way to make money from permafrost.
Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to
introduce to Inuvik's newest and fastest-
growing industry:
Funeral services.
Specifically, entrepreneurs in the town of
Inuvik have figured out a scheme whereby
people can have their remains interred
beneath the permafrost forever. For
Canadians outside the Territories, the price
tag is $5,000. Foreigners can expect to be
dunned an extra 10 grand for the experience.
What's the attraction? Well, permafrost
By Raymond Canon
they doing about the mess their country finds
itself in. Like the Canadian dollar their
currency has fallen on money markets,
although since both countries are export-
oriented, this is not totally a bad thing. The
Belgian situation is complicated by the fact
that the country is divided into two distinct
parts, the Flemish (Dutch) speaking north
and the French speaking south. Each
watches the other like a hawk on the look
out for any legislation that would give more
comfort to one group than the other.
However, since both are in the same
financial boat, there has to be some
agreement. The government's approach has
been to introduce legislation that will,
introduce a three-year wage freeze, cut
social security, health-care and child benefits
and put new taxes on property and
investment income.
The level of unemployment in Belgium is
marginally lower than here and to get the
figure down to single digit levels, the
government would like to cut social security
contributions to low paid workers and
deregulate the labour market.
If you are wondering what that might
entail, this would mean getting rid of such
things as a minimum wage which, as most
economists (including this one) are happy to
explain, does cause unemployment and in
the very areas where unemployment rates
are the highest.
Can you imagine Bob Rae getting up in
Queen's Park and announcing that he is
doing away with minimum wages? I can't
for a minute and yet I have to point out that
every province has one and the Belgians are
going to be just as hard to move on such
changes as are Canadians.
There is a lesson to be learned here. As I
pointed out, the country is divided into two
distinct linguistic groups and for years the
government in Brussels, the capital, has
decided to buy off each linguistic pressure
group instead of keeping an eye on how
much fiscal damage this was doing to the
country.
will keep a corpse in a lot better shape than
all the embalming tricks used on King
Tutenkamen - or Ronald Reagan, come to
that. Customers are investing in the age-old
dream of Eternal Life. They're putting their
bodies in the deep freeze and betting that
doctors in the future will be able to defrost
them, hook up their vital functions and put
them on the road again.
Other northern towns are entering into the
spirit of competition. Igaluit is proposing a
special cut-rate mausoleum menu: for
residents, $600; for other Canadians, $3,200;
and for foreigners, $7,200. For that all-
inclusive price, friendly attendants will put
your carcass on ice and pay your rent in
perpetuity - or until medicine comes up with
some way to reactivate your circuits.
Will it work, or is this just a frosty pipe
dream? Beats me. But I can think of scarier
fates for our Far North than becoming
undertaker to the world. It's peaceful, doesn't
involve neon signs and it's an environmen-
tally-friendly source of income.
Besides, if the Global Warming gloom-
sters are correct and earth's temperature is
rising, that means the permafrost will melt
and all those bodies will err-umm...melt too.
And our Far North could end up with
some of the richest soil this side of the Napa
Valley.
Canada's Arctic - breadbasket of the
world. Are we ready for it?
However, the sobbing sound you hear is
not only the Belgians crying into their vin
blanc. There is great wailing and gnashing of
teeth going on all around them. The German
economy is flat, unemployment in Holland is
rising and in France it is even worse than in
Canada and likely to go higher. The Dutch
have a public debt about as bad as Canada's:
the French and the Germans, on the other
hand, have per capita debts somewhat lower.
To all those readers who are old enough to
remember, all this may have a familiar ring
to it. The 1920s were frequently called "the
roaring twenties" because of all the high
levels of spending going on. This was
followed by the 30s and we all know what
happened then. If you think back, the 1980s
were very much a decade led by high levels
of consumer spending, much of which was
fed by debt. In a decade when we should
have been reining in our debt, we were doing
exactly the opposite. When you factor in the
restructuring in industry going on in
Belgium, Canada and everywhere else, is it
any wonder why we are taking our time
getting back into the peak phase of the
business cyr’e.
There is still validity in the old adage that
those who ignore the lessons of history are
doomed to repeat them. The Belgians, and I
would imagine everybody else, are learning
this to their sorrow.
Paul’s Perspective
Continued from page 4
will be a prohibition on "tied selling". This is
where the purchase of one product is
conditional on the purchase of another
product. Credit Unions must also disclose
how much deposit insurance they have.
Huron County has several Credit Unions
and the changes in the Act will allow them
to provide for locally directed financing and
service. The changes to the Credit Union Act
and the programs by the Ministry of
Agriculture will allow rural Ontario to keep
and use its savings for its own economy.
The
Short
of it
By Bonnie Gropp
A resolution for
true equality
It was coming to a close and as the
countdown towards the new year began
many people were caught up in the
excitement shared by all awaiting the
moment of "Auld Lange Syne".
Ten, nine, eight, seven, six, five, four,
three, two, one. In spots across the country
the voices of New Year's Eve revelers
crescendoed with the call until finally
replaced by a cacophonous choir of horns
and noisemakers.
We were a small group at our party,
though no less exuberant as we ushered in
94. Close friends who had celebrated
together for almost 20 years we had many
memories to bring to this, as every, New
Year's party. We knew of times when a year
had been kind to some, less kind to others.
We had seen growth and change in and
around us. We knew when there had been
suffering or rejoicing. And we all had some
idealistic hope for tomorrow.
Never before did I sense the frustration
and fear which eventually crashed this
gathering, however. As the minutes clicked
past into the new year and the champagne
bubbles fizzled, our gaiety ebbed until an
almost somber mood overtook it.
New Year's Eve is traditionally a time for
soul searching, to think of rejuvenation. It is
often the time when we look at the mistakes
we make or our imperfections and resolve,
usually frivolously, to fix them.
This year, however, the flaws discussed
belonged to a broader group, the bureaucrats
who have presented us with a Canada we
know longer recognize or understand. After
countless maneuvers which show about as
much common sense as a dog that bites the
hand that feeds it, politicians have lost our
respect, our patience and our trust.
The bureaucratic debacle that raised the
most ire in discussions at our party was the
BS of being PC (the latter stands for
politically correct, the former I presume you
know). We all agreed that the whole thing
had not only gone too far, but that it was
ludicrous. It has made us afraid for the future
of our children and for the culture of our
country. That these supposedly intelligent
human beings should fail to recognize, of
worse choose to ignore, that the reverse
discrimination being displayed with such
moves as the screening of job applicants for
sex and race and the idea that Christmas no
longer be celebrated in the workplace and
schools as a religious holiday because not all
Canadians are Christians is misguided and
dangerous.
The males at this party no longer shake
their heads when the topic comes up, they
get mad! Their arguments are justified and
sound, but unfortunately the realities have
made them harsh.
People may argue that white men are
spoilt, they've had it their own way too long,
but we'd better remember that a tree will
break if it bends too far, no matter what the
direction.
The government needs to open its eyes.
Any parent will attest that playing favourites
only spoils one while alienating the other.
Forgetting what's important to some to
appease a few festers hostility. If
government could make a resolution for the
new year perhaps it should be to look first at
each Canadian, as a person, to be judged on
his or her merit, not on colour or gender,
then at the culture that built this country in
the first place.
Otherwise someone had better be prepared
for the spawn of intolerance I see breeding
here.