HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2019-06-06, Page 11THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, JUNE 6, 2019. PAGE 11.
Continued from page 10
listening after that. The second one,
when I asked him to give me a
number, said “12%”. The likelihood
of recovering my ability to walk,
considering what strength I had
gained after three months in rehab,
my level of injury, my age and health
was 12%.
Neither of these doctors had
particularly uplifting news. But at
some point in time, I’m not sure
when, I started to say that 12 is not
zero. Meaning that, at least there was
a 12% chance of recovery, like
12/100 on an exam is better than
zero! I think this is where I started to
“flip it”. Here is my blog post from
that time:
FLIP IT: OCT 10, 2016
When something is presented in a
negative way, flip it. Make it
positive. Draw it out so that
whatever is being said changes from
bad to good or from a put down to a
lift up. Every so often I run into
someone that I have not seen for a
while (or since the collision) and
they say how it’s “good to see you
out”. Like I’m not supposed to be
out? I suppose it is possible that
some people would choose to give up
(I have had my moments), but
staying in is just, well, boring.
I get out alright. On Saturday the
kids and I went to market (again),
the last outdoor market of this
season. Even though I know this is
silly, I felt like it was my last chance
to get fresh local food. So my fridge
is now full – I think I bought three
broccoli – it all looked so good.
This is where I was when another
“it's good to see you out” happened.
I know it is meant well; really, I do.
But how about just saying hello and
asking how I am or how my recovery
is going? So, this is where I have to
try and flip it. They mean well; they
are just concerned for my well-being
and are not sure otherwise what to
say. I say that I do indeed get out, a
lot, and then I tell them what I want
them to know: how my recovery is
going and what we have been up to.
I think that Ella is starting to get
tired of me flipping situations that
she tells me about. I got told to “stop
lecturing me” when we were talking
about situations at school. You know,
the kid who is kicking and screaming
their way down the hall to the
principal’s office? We don’t know
what is going on in their lives, what
home is like, etc. I'm just trying for
empathy – which I know she has a
lot of – but as a parent, it’s my job,
right?
Oliver started going to karate
lessons about four weeks ago. I went
to watch last week. He got his Gi for
the first time and ran to put it on – so
excited, he just threw his shorts into
my lap and ran to join the group.
At the break, he came over to see
me and said “Mom, I feel so
powerful in this!” When we went out
to the car, I told him that it was
evident that he had learned a lot in
the past few weeks and that I
remember doing a lot of what he had
learned. We had karate lessons when
we were kids; I think we even went
with my Dad for some period of time.
I remember it being hard but
satisfying at the same time.
I told Oliver that I wished that I
could do it with him. At this point I
was keeping my voice steady, trying
not to show the emotion I was
feeling. He didn’t even miss a beat:
“Well, you can still do it with your
arms – you can do it sitting on your
plinth!” Of course I can. That's the
thing with adults – we get stuck in
our ways (like parking in the same
spot every day), not even trying to
think outside the box. And here is
ten-year-old Oliver, without even
stopping to think about it, flipping it.
Making anything possible.
So try it. Next time someone (or
even yourself) says something
negative, flip it upside down. Say
how you want to be, not how you
don't want to be. Give it/them the
benefit of the doubt. Stop being
negative and start being positive. It
is hard, and you’ll forget (I do)
sometimes. But you’ll feel better
each time you try. I do.
I am still trying to practise this,
because it is a practice. Flipping it
will always take effort. But the more
you do it, the better you get (just like
shots in basketball). Don’t just “flip
it” with strangers; I have been
practising on those closest to me –
Theo and the kids. I try not to
assume I know all that is going on in
their heads, and all that has gone on
with their day. Take a breath, stop a
beat and think, “What is going on
here?” and flip it. As a problem
solver by nature, I have always
jumped into that mode when people
oppose me or present me with a
situation that needs a resolution.
Changing my first reaction has
helped them, and me. It means not
going to that “oh, this is what you
should do” place which they don’t
usually want to hear, anyways. They
want to know that they have been
heard, and they want their feelings
acknowledged. It also helps me to
get to know them better. Yes, my
husband and my kids. After 25, 15
and 12 years, I am practising getting
to know them better.
Read The Citizen next week for
the second of three installments of
Julie Sawchuk’s Shine chapter,
beginning with “Forgive Yourself”.
- SL
Sawchuk aims to ‘flip it’ on path to positivity
Wark, staff to prepare
for deep cuts in 2020
Continued from page 1
with staff and presenting her
findings to council. Her conclusions,
she said, could be put to use in the
2020 budget process, as Huron and
other communities across Ontario
anticipate cuts from the provincial
government.
Time will tell, however, as to how
the expected cuts will affect Huron
County, Wark said, and the direction
council will take, with a number of
options on the table.
One of the top contenders, Wark
said, to help find further efficiencies
in Huron County will be to share
services with lower-tier
municipalities and beyond. This is a
discussion that has already taken
place in one form or another for
several years, she said, and it now
makes sense to look at it closely as
the county builds towards its 2020
budget.
Conversations regarding shared
services and how to anticipate and
absorb provincial funding cuts, Wark
said, are ongoing and will be
discussed by Huron County Council
in the near future.
A change of pace
Blyth’s Julie Sawchuk went from training for the Goderich Triathlon as a member of the
Goderich Tri-Hards to a new reality for her outdoor fitness. She has found numerous ways to
get active and be outside, however, including the use of her new handbike. She has used the
bike to participate in Greg’s Ride and the Dave Mounsey Memorial Fund’s Run Around the
Square, among other events. (File photo)
541 Turnberry St., Brussels
519-887-9114
405 Queen St., Blyth
519-523-4792 The Citizen
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