Loading...
HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2019-06-06, Page 11THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, JUNE 6, 2019. PAGE 11. Continued from page 10 listening after that. The second one, when I asked him to give me a number, said “12%”. The likelihood of recovering my ability to walk, considering what strength I had gained after three months in rehab, my level of injury, my age and health was 12%. Neither of these doctors had particularly uplifting news. But at some point in time, I’m not sure when, I started to say that 12 is not zero. Meaning that, at least there was a 12% chance of recovery, like 12/100 on an exam is better than zero! I think this is where I started to “flip it”. Here is my blog post from that time: FLIP IT: OCT 10, 2016 When something is presented in a negative way, flip it. Make it positive. Draw it out so that whatever is being said changes from bad to good or from a put down to a lift up. Every so often I run into someone that I have not seen for a while (or since the collision) and they say how it’s “good to see you out”. Like I’m not supposed to be out? I suppose it is possible that some people would choose to give up (I have had my moments), but staying in is just, well, boring. I get out alright. On Saturday the kids and I went to market (again), the last outdoor market of this season. Even though I know this is silly, I felt like it was my last chance to get fresh local food. So my fridge is now full – I think I bought three broccoli – it all looked so good. This is where I was when another “it's good to see you out” happened. I know it is meant well; really, I do. But how about just saying hello and asking how I am or how my recovery is going? So, this is where I have to try and flip it. They mean well; they are just concerned for my well-being and are not sure otherwise what to say. I say that I do indeed get out, a lot, and then I tell them what I want them to know: how my recovery is going and what we have been up to. I think that Ella is starting to get tired of me flipping situations that she tells me about. I got told to “stop lecturing me” when we were talking about situations at school. You know, the kid who is kicking and screaming their way down the hall to the principal’s office? We don’t know what is going on in their lives, what home is like, etc. I'm just trying for empathy – which I know she has a lot of – but as a parent, it’s my job, right? Oliver started going to karate lessons about four weeks ago. I went to watch last week. He got his Gi for the first time and ran to put it on – so excited, he just threw his shorts into my lap and ran to join the group. At the break, he came over to see me and said “Mom, I feel so powerful in this!” When we went out to the car, I told him that it was evident that he had learned a lot in the past few weeks and that I remember doing a lot of what he had learned. We had karate lessons when we were kids; I think we even went with my Dad for some period of time. I remember it being hard but satisfying at the same time. I told Oliver that I wished that I could do it with him. At this point I was keeping my voice steady, trying not to show the emotion I was feeling. He didn’t even miss a beat: “Well, you can still do it with your arms – you can do it sitting on your plinth!” Of course I can. That's the thing with adults – we get stuck in our ways (like parking in the same spot every day), not even trying to think outside the box. And here is ten-year-old Oliver, without even stopping to think about it, flipping it. Making anything possible. So try it. Next time someone (or even yourself) says something negative, flip it upside down. Say how you want to be, not how you don't want to be. Give it/them the benefit of the doubt. Stop being negative and start being positive. It is hard, and you’ll forget (I do) sometimes. But you’ll feel better each time you try. I do. I am still trying to practise this, because it is a practice. Flipping it will always take effort. But the more you do it, the better you get (just like shots in basketball). Don’t just “flip it” with strangers; I have been practising on those closest to me – Theo and the kids. I try not to assume I know all that is going on in their heads, and all that has gone on with their day. Take a breath, stop a beat and think, “What is going on here?” and flip it. As a problem solver by nature, I have always jumped into that mode when people oppose me or present me with a situation that needs a resolution. Changing my first reaction has helped them, and me. It means not going to that “oh, this is what you should do” place which they don’t usually want to hear, anyways. They want to know that they have been heard, and they want their feelings acknowledged. It also helps me to get to know them better. Yes, my husband and my kids. After 25, 15 and 12 years, I am practising getting to know them better. Read The Citizen next week for the second of three installments of Julie Sawchuk’s Shine chapter, beginning with “Forgive Yourself”. - SL Sawchuk aims to ‘flip it’ on path to positivity Wark, staff to prepare for deep cuts in 2020 Continued from page 1 with staff and presenting her findings to council. Her conclusions, she said, could be put to use in the 2020 budget process, as Huron and other communities across Ontario anticipate cuts from the provincial government. Time will tell, however, as to how the expected cuts will affect Huron County, Wark said, and the direction council will take, with a number of options on the table. One of the top contenders, Wark said, to help find further efficiencies in Huron County will be to share services with lower-tier municipalities and beyond. This is a discussion that has already taken place in one form or another for several years, she said, and it now makes sense to look at it closely as the county builds towards its 2020 budget. Conversations regarding shared services and how to anticipate and absorb provincial funding cuts, Wark said, are ongoing and will be discussed by Huron County Council in the near future. A change of pace Blyth’s Julie Sawchuk went from training for the Goderich Triathlon as a member of the Goderich Tri-Hards to a new reality for her outdoor fitness. She has found numerous ways to get active and be outside, however, including the use of her new handbike. She has used the bike to participate in Greg’s Ride and the Dave Mounsey Memorial Fund’s Run Around the Square, among other events. (File photo) 541 Turnberry St., Brussels 519-887-9114 405 Queen St., Blyth 519-523-4792 The Citizen Great books available at... Your Spring Reading Source TOP 150 UNUSUAL THINGS TO SEE IN ONTARIO Ron Brown just keeps finding more interesting places to visit. Regional tips include the Corran ruin near Wiarton, the Eugenia Arches, secrets of the Greenock Swamp and West Montrose’s cove bridge. $29.95 BACKROADS OF ONTARIO Ron Brown has updated and expanded this guide to hundreds of interesting places to visit throughout Ontario. Mapped out routes for daytrips let you get to know rural Ontario with interesting stories about spots along the way. $29.95 THE BEAUTY AND BOUNTY OF HURON COUNTY Stunning photographs by 3 Huron County photographers, including Brussels’ David Bishop, show Huron County as you’ve never seen it with aerial shots, wildlife, landscapes, nature. $40.00 OUT OF THE WOODS: CHRONICLES AND CHARACTERS OF HURON COUNTY David's collection of stories appeals to the casual reader and history buff alike. Each short entry is filled with human interest and details that open a window to the county's past and its characters. Arranged in chronological order - from the time of the region's Indigenous people through to early settlement and finally to Canada's coming of age during the Great War - it is a book you can enjoy one story at a time or cover to cover. $25.00 THE ORGANIC LAWN CARE MANUAL The ban on pesticide use on lawns doesn’t mean you can’t have a good- looking lawn. This 270- page manual provides information on how to have a healthy lawn, identify pests and control them. $26.95 BUILD A CLASSIC TIMBER-FRAMED HOUSE A timber-framed home is attractive, affordable and easily expanded to meet the needs of a growing family. With this step-by-step instruction book you can build one of your own. Plenty of photos help. $26.95 A BABY BOOMER’S EYE CHART Who says aging can’t have a little fun thrown in. In the spirit of testing and exercising visual acuity, this book presents a series of witty eye charts that each culminate in a punchline so small you’re reaching for glasses. 50% off Only $7.75 FARM DOGS: A Comprehensive Breed Guide Learn the history, breed standards and traits of 93 working breeds. Whether you want a multipurpose farm partner or a family companion, here’s the ultimate guide to herders, terriers and earth dogs. $39.95 BUY? SELL? TRY CLASSIFIED