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The Citizen, 1991-02-13, Page 17THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 13, 1991. PAGE 17. Calligraphy: Let it enhance your wedding There will be plenty of wedd­ ings this year. They will be traditional church weddings, afternoon garden affairs and new wave happenings. No matter the style, in keeping with formal etiquette, most of the invitation envelopes will be hand- addressed and hand-stamped; most thank-you notes will be handwritten. And, in keeping with today’s modern approach to equality of the sexes, the bride and groom often will share in this responsibil­ ity. But what do you do if you both have awful handwriting, hate to write notes, and think maybe etiquette expert Amy Vanderbilt was much too rigid when she Marrying the step-family Over 20 per cent of 83.5 million U.S. households are now “blend­ ed” families, with more than 1,300 new stepfamilies being add­ ed every day. The Ozzie and Harriet nuclear family is branch­ ing out. Recent studies show that the “average” American family may include as many as eight parents and numerous children. Complexities that arise with adaption and adoption can make remarriage an emotional event for all family members.' Bride’s magazine offers these suggestions for smoothing over the transition from single parent to strong stepfamily. UNDER ONE ROOF Before the wedding: Planning a life together is important for every couple, but for a stepfamily, it is essential. Topics that can create conflict in marriage - how time, money, and energy will be spent - become exaggerated even further by the many family members whose opinions need to be con­ sidered. Other conflicts can result from differences in temperament, backgrounds, and traditions. The best forum for working out such conflicts is the family meeting, where each member expresses his or her feelings and needs, while everyone contributes possible sol­ utions. Before the marriage, parents should also discuss what role the stepparent will play in the child’s upbringing. “Some of the most successful stepparents have seen their role as similar to that of a camp counselor, an adult who shows interest and affection yet provides leadership,” says Carol Brady, Ph.D., a Houston, TX clinical psychologist. During the wedding: From the invitation, which can be issued with the children’s names an­ nouncing the formation of a “new family,” to the reception, where the children’s favorite music can be played, there is one rule: When children are a part of your life together, include them in your wedding as much as possible. ROLES FOR CHILDREN They can be your attendants or altar boys, ring bearer or flower girls. Your vows to each other might be followed by a family vow or a prayer of family unity with each member adding a phrase. Your child could take the place of a family member no longer alive; if the bride’s father has passed away, her child might escort her to the altar. Or, as Bride’s magazine’s Associate Edi­ tor Millie Martini and her fiance decided, show the importance of the child by having him at your side at the altar. “CoCo, John's daughter, will serve in the role of suggested the handwriting be in a “rounded, clear, English style affected by social secretaries.” Calligraphy, derived from the Greek word Kalligraphia, means beautiful writing. It is an ancient art form created from the first Roman alphabets, and further developed and refined in the Middle Ages. Monks and scribes used calli­ graphy to produce Bibles and manuscripts. Today, it lends a special style to handwritten mess­ ages of all kinds. Although the elegant, flowing lines of this distinctive writing form may seem complicated to master, the basic techniques used to produce a calligraphic alphabet are easy to learn. And you do not ‘best man’ at our wedding,” Martini explained. “John felt that there was no one else he’d rather have beside him as he made this important commitment, and she was excited to be asked.” REASSURE YOUR CHILD Even if your child seems to have adjusted to the idea of your marriage, the wedding day may surprise all of you by making him or her feel insecure. Assign a close relative to reassure and give hugs when needed throughout the day. If your children feel uncomfor­ table with the idea of participating in the ceremony, include them in other ways. Assign them seats of honor, mention their names in a special prayer. Give children gifts to commemorate the day. Some­ thing that they can enjoy imme­ diately, like a camera, engraved jewelry or a tape recorder, will further remind them of how special the day was when you became a family. need good handwriting or artistic talent to become a good calligra­ pher. With quality materials, easy-to-follow instructions and practice, the bride-to-be and groom-to-be can give their wedd­ ing invitations and thank-you notes a very special signature in just a matter of weeks. Ken Brown, a self-taught calli­ graphy expert, has developed 14 basic calligraphy pen strokes that create all the letters of the alphabet. His simple rules relat­ ing to hand and pen positions help the beginner quickly and easily create the graceful letters. “When forming calligraphic letters, the writer pulls the nib pen instead of pushing it as with a writing pen,” he says. “There­ fore, the pen and hand positions are very important. “The angle of the pen point, the hand position and pen position are what enable the writer to form the correct letter strokes almost im­ mediately,” he adds. How does the beginner become a seasoned calligrapher in time to address wedding invitations and write thank-you notes? Brown suggests that you allow six to eight weeks to learn the basic (I ft a ft . “A Balloon Affair” Types of Decorating A I a ft a ft calligraphy strokes. “With practice, the repetitive formation of these common ele­ ments makes every character easy to do,” he says. “It is best to practise regularly, but for short periods of time. That way, you will be fresh and relaxed - two key factors in producing a consistent, flowing style.” There is a wide variety of high quality materials and kits avail­ able, at all price ranges, to help beginners learn calligraphy, says Brown. Elegant Writer calligraphy markers are available in a variety of popular colors including blue, red, green, violet, burgundy, black and brown. The colored pens can complement the color scheme of the wedding, adds Brown. In addition, a wide selection of nib widths allows thick, thin and decorative strokes. Specialty pap­ ers, the Speedball Textbook and any of the instruction books also aid the beginning and advanced calligrapher. Brown’s enthusiasm for calli­ graphy and wedding celebrations is obvious. “Just add ‘learn calligraphy’ to the planning cal­ Complete Decorating Service • BALLOON ARCHES BALLOON TOWERS BALLOON CENTRE PIECES STREAMERS, BELLS, ETC. Call for your free estimate! PAM CAMERON • WINGHAM • 357-2495 WEDDINGS BIRTHDAYS ANNIVERSARIES ANY OCCASION endar and the wedding invitation^ and correspondence will have a very personal flair,” he says. Walden Photography 210 Hill St., Clinton 3 houses north of Clinton Hospital 482-7675 Good Wedding Photography doesn’t just happen it has to be planned.