The Rural Voice, 1999-12, Page 16curi4
1 AkIf,5
T.5
CONSULTING
1-888-923-9995
A19(6
Independent Ontario
Hog Producer Association
I.O.H.P.A.
MEETING
THURS., NOV. 25, 1999
SOUTH HURON RECREATION CENTRE,
EXETER
7:15 p.m. Registration
7:30 p.m. Independent Hog
Producers Investment
Corporation (IHPIC) update
8:00 p.m. Dr. Thomas Baker -
Manager, Policy & Audit
Services
Meat Industry
Inspection Branch,
John Farlinger - Client
Account Representative
Update on Provincial
Inspection Program
8:30 p.m. Cathy Akker - OSI
- How pigs in Ontario differ
in carcass quality, growth,
feed efficiency
9:00 p.m. Laurie Murdock - Executive
Director of the Ontario
Independent Meat Packers
and Processers
9:15 p.m. Marketing Committee
Update - Martin Van Bakel
9:30 p.m. Political Committee Update
- Gerald Kolkman
9:45 p.m. Information Committee
Update - Ron Van Bakel
10:00 p.m.Questions and Answer
Period
12 THE RURAL VOICE
Mabel's Grill
"From now on I don't want to be a
farmer, I want to be a CEO," said
Dave Winston over bacon and eggs
at Mabel's the other morning.
"I mean I was reading in the paper
that the average CEO in Toronto
makes — I
didn't say
earns —
$354,000 a
year and their
pay is.
increasing
twice as fast as
anybody that
works for
them. Then on
top of that they
get rented cars
worth $740 a
month and
club member-
ships and good
pension plans. I mean why can't we
hog farmers get perks like that?"
"You get cheap bacon if a hog
breaks his leg and has to be
butchered," said George McKenzie.
"Whoopee," grouched Dave. "It
hardly rates with a BMW."
"You get a free club member-
ship," said Molly Whiteside as she
delivered Dave's toast. "Membership
in the Mabel's Grill Whiners and
Complainers Circle."
"Aw if you ever got the $354,000
a year your wife would file for pay
equity anyway," said George.
"What do you mean 'pay equity',"
said Molly. "If you guys were worth
$354,000 your wives should be worth
at least half a mill. For one thing they
work harder. You don't see them
sitting around in here half the day."
"In CEO -land this is called
networking," said Cliff Murray.
"I kind of like the concept they
used in this pay equity thing," said
Dave. "I mean with those women that
worked for the government, they
went out to find some guy who was
earning more, figured what he was
doing was no more important than
what the woman did, so she should
get as much as he did. Think if that
applied in farming. I mean Michael
McCain couldn't make all his money
if he didn't have pigs to process
right? So I should make as much as
he does."
The world's
problems are
solved daily
'round the table
at Mabel's
"Only If the teachers' pension
fund buys your farm," said George.
"I like the concept," said Cliff.
"Wait a minute, try to find
anybody anywhere who you could
compare yourself to and get more
money," said George. "Nobody
makes money off sheep."
• "I'll find somebody somewhere,"
said Cliff.
"Exactly the idea of pay equity!"
said Dave. -
"Ah, so what would you do if you
did make $354,000 a year?" asked
Mabel as she plunked down in a
chair at the next table to take a break
from cooking after three hours in the
kitchen.
"They might up their tips to 50
cents instead of a dime," said Molly.
"You'd pay taxes. Plenty of
taxes," grumbled George.
"Yeh, then I could join Preston
Manning and all those columnists for
The National Post who are always
complaining about taxes being too
high," said Dave. "As it is, you have
to have a taxable income to worry
about taxes being too high and with
pigs the way they'vetbeen'the last
couple of years, taxes are something
that haven't concerned me much."
"You ever noticed that the people
who gripe the most about taxes are
the people who still have the most
left over to spend?" asked Cliff.
"Yeh. I mean what do these
people need all the money for?"
wondered Mabel. "They get rich then
they think they have to go out and
spend it on things like $1.2 million
for an old Marilyn Munroe dress."
"Cripes, they still had that around
after all these years? We give our old
clothes to Good Will," said Cliff.
"See you're already rich if you
can give away old clothes," said
George. "When I was growing up my
mother cut them up and hooked them
into rugs."
"And you walked 10 miles to
school up hill both ways," sniped
Molly.
"Imagine if somebody had hooked
Marilyn's dress into a rug?" said
Mabel.
"You'd never get it to lay flat,"
grinned Dave. "That dress had some
pretty big bumps in it, at least when
Marilyn wore it."0