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The Citizen, 1987-02-04, Page 19THE CITIZEN, WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 4, 1987. PAGE 19. ■■ <$7 —H His 'n' hers showers give modern twist Even in these modern times, sexual inequality thrives when it comestothewedding. Not true, you say? Well, think about the bridal shower. Today the average shower is a party for the bride with mothers, sisters, aunts, grand­ mothers and girlfriends in atten­ dance. And the gifts? Things to help the new wife take care of the house. Where does that leave the bridegroom? To fend for himself, no doubt. Noone thinks to give him the implements he’ll need to carry out his share of the household chores. While the bride spends the first weeks of her marriage cheerfully trying out cookbooks and utensils, her husband is scouring the stores for tools, nails, lawnmowers and rakes. Before he can begin sharing the work, he has to find and buy. What’s the solution to this modern-day shower inequality? The wedding shower for couples. Honoring the couple instead of just the bride, this celebration not only helps the groom get comfort­ able in his new home sooner, but also makes a lot of sense. Shower invitations should alert guests on this twist on tradition by simply stating the event is in celebration of Sue and John. Instead of assigning each guest a category like kitchen or bath items from which to choose a gift, you might advise them to buy with the wife, the husband or both newly­ weds in mind to ensure that the groom gets his share of the fun. One household responsibility that’s still generally thought of as the man’s domain is tending bar, so gifts to help him “stock up’’ would be well appreciated. A wine rack is sure to please most grooms, particularly if it comes complete with a bottle of his favorite vintage. An ice bucket or blender will win favor as a bar basic, while a variety of liqueurs can add a note of sophistication. For the more humdrum side of domesticity, consider garden equipment or a tool kit. Even an apartment dweller needs a hamm­ er, pliers, and screwdriver, and for the first-time homeowner, these basics are absolute essentials. An outdoor barbecue is one way to encourage a reluctant chef to take on some of the cooking duties. And if the groom is a gourmet, “A tradition in Huron County since 1902" ALBERT ST., CLINTON 482-9727 Remember - When You Buy Bartliff’s, You Buy the Best! From Bartliff’s Bakery in Clinton Let our specialists create a beautiful cake for your wedding. We also specialize in Birthday Cakes, Anniversary Cakes, Pies, Petit fours, & Cookies. r J you’re safe with anything from a pasta maker to a spice rack. Ifyou’re not sure how the new couple intends to divide house­ work, simply give gifts they both will use. A collection of record albums is a thoughtful choice, particularly if you can include the song they’ve chosen for the first dance at their wedding reception. A year’s cable television subscrip­ tion is an unusual gift they both can enjoy, even if she’s an old movie buff and he’s a devoted sports fan - or vice-versa. If guests are at all concerned about the bride sharing her shower with the groom, justask them to imagine how she’ll feel when he says, “honey, come look at the shelf I put up today for our new china.” Attendants pay their own costs at wedding Attendants at a wedding may learn the lessonof the bride and groom: weddings can be an expensive celebration. There are some time-tested, etiquette entrenched expenses ' that bridesmaids and ushers must accept gracefully: they have been honored with special responsibili­ ties in the union of the bride and groom, and these honors carry with them special costs. Bridesmaids pay for their own bridesmaids dresses, shoes, gloves and other accessories, their own transportation to and from the city or town where the wedding takes place, an individual gift to the couple, a shower or luncheon for the bride, and sometimes a contribution to a gift from all bridesmaids to the bride. The ushers pay for the rental of their wedding attire, transporta­ tion to and from the wedding location, an individual gift to the couple, sometimes a contribution to a gift from all ushers to the groom, and a bachelor dinner, if given, for the groom. Country Weddings at Receptions BENMILLER inn Set in the beautiful Maitland River Valley We carry much more them linens! Unique gifts in every price range. Showers, Weddings or Attendants! Come out and take a look for yourself Woollen Mill, Garden Patio •We can help you plan a wedding reception for up to 90 people •Your wedding guests can be accommoaat- ed overnight at The Inn •Spend your wedding night at the Benmiiier Inn and it’s sure to be a night to remember 13 Market Place STRATFORD Stratford Behind City Hall around the corner from Avon Theatre •Entertain your wedding rehearsal party at the Inn Come out and have a look around For further information contact Benmiiier Inn R.R.4, Goderich Ontario N7A3Y1 519-524-2191