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Home My WebLink AboutThe Citizen, 1988-02-10, Page 24PAGE 24. THE CITIZEN. WEDNESDAY, FEBRUARY 10, 1988. Origins of beloved customs lie in ancient marriage rites It happens in every wedding: The bride and groom exchange rings. They share cake. The bride throws her bouquet. But do you know how these customs began? THE BRIDE: A Celebration (Harry N. Abrams, Inc.), a new book by Barbara Tober, Editor-in- Chief of Bride’s magazine, reveals their sometimes surprising ori gins. The bride throws her bouquet so an unmarried friend can “catch” some luck in romance, goes the modern explanation. But the cus- tomactually startedasa form of self-defense. Roses speak the universal language of love for couples During the early 19th century, the language of love was often spoken through flowers. Prior to the marriage vows, smitten suitors courted their sweethearts with carefully select ed bouquets that conveyed thoughts like “Love at first sight” (one single thornless rose). “Will you marry me?” or the announce ment of a pending marriage was represented by the combination of one red and one white long stem rose tied together with ribbon or lace. Prenuptial and wedding flowers symbolize the beauty of marriage, and the growth of love and devotion between you and your groom. You can make your wedding day extra special by choosing blossoms that convey your love to everyone involved. Roses are the perennial favour ite for wedding flowers. They envelope you in fragrance, can add the purity of white or a brilliant sp'ash of colour, and help to express the beautiful sentiments you hold within. Each rose colour has a transla tion in “rose language” dating back to Victorian times. Many courtships began with the gift of a single rose which later led to the rose becoming a central theme in a 10 dos and don'ts surrounding weddings 1. The bride should register only with one store of a kind. 2. The bride should quietly inform a relative about some larger expensive items that she would love to have. 3. No bride-to-be should allow the store at which she is registered to send out notices to her friends and wedding guest list that she is registered there. 4. It is improper to open gifts at the reception. 5. The bride should write a thank-you note as soon as she possibly can, but not on cards that say “Thank You” on the top fold. When wives work full time, husbands should share the task of writing thank-you notes. 6. Gifts from the immediate family of either the bride or the groom should never be returned to a store in exchange for something else, as feelings could easily be hurt by such an action. (The exception to this, of course, is if there are duplicate gifts.) 7. When an engagement is broken or a wedding does not take place, the gifts, especially gifts of great value, must be returned to all senders with brief and tactful notes of explanation. 8. Both bride and groom give their attendants some lasting memento of the occasion. While these gifts are often silver or gold, a gift of crystal is an excellent idea. 9. The wedding party gives the bride and groom some lasting memento of the occasion, engraved with the couple’s initials and wedding date. 10. The groom usually gives his bride a personal gift just before the wedding. The bride in turn gives something to the groom. If one of the pair is far richer than the other, the one with the more money should “tone down” his or her present. There will be plenty of time for lavish presents later. Receptions & Gatherings We’ll give your party the special attention and planning it deserves... Our newly renovated Dining Facilities will offer you private dining for groups of most any size - ‘‘Large or Small”. Call today to reserve for your special occasion. Specially for you 1 The Brussels Hotel will also be pleased to arrange your LIVE ENTERTAINMENT I ) »„ * 9 Turnberry St. 887-9035 fl In times past, belief in the mystical value of a bride’s adorn ments prompted friends and stran gers alike to try to grab a piece of her outfit. Eventually, some clever bride found that by flinging her flowers away from herself, the crowd would have something to fight over - and she would escape intact! The wedding party originally served the serious purpose of protecting the bride and groom from the curses of evilwishers. They dressed in clothes exactly like those of the bride and groom, so the identity of the happy couple was couple’s wedding plans. Today, you can personalize your weddingby selecting roses that communicate special feelings to your groom, family members, attendants and close friends. For your groom - Everyone’s knows a single rose means “I love you”, nothing could make a more perfect statement. The roses you carry in your bouquet can also send a private message to your groom: Red hybrid tea roses (the long stemmed variety) signify “I’ll love you always”, coral or sonia roses denote “enthusiasm and desire”. You may want to give him a boutonniere with one red and one white rose bud, to symbolize your “unity”. For your parents - At the end of the ceremony, prior to walking down the aisle with your new partner, present your parents with a bouquet of roses in full bloom. This colourful and sweet smell ing gift expresses your gratitude and says, “Thanks for everything: we won’t forget what you have done for us.” Afteryou arrive at the honey moon destination, send a “thank you” arrangement to each set of your parents. This unique arrange ment should be all pink roses which convey “perfect happiness.” kept secret on the way to the church and until they were safely married. The first piece of wedding cake is cut and eaten by the bride and groom as a carry-over from the time when thesharingoffood or wine often was the marriage. Teutons, for example, were considered wed after drinking mead together for 30 days. (The word bridal comes from bride-ale). The aisle runner protected the bride from evil spirits who, it was thought, lived below the ground. These demons were also feared to lurk around doorways, hence the bride is carried over the threshold of her new home. For your attendants - Nothing is as important on your wedding day as being surrounded by the people who mean the most to you. Let them know you are honoured by their presence by selecting the following blooms for their bou quets: Red and yellow roses together stand for “jovial, happy feelings”. Sweetheart roses stand for just what their name means, “you’re a sweetheart”. Have your flower girl carry a basket of rose petals. This precious little “gem” walking down the aisle scattering the petals to and fro is spreading the news of “life aplenty”. Let the roses you choose speak for everyone in attendance. Decor ate the altar and reception tables with clusters of yellow roses. Lots and lots of yellow roses mean “joy and gladness.” Rice symbolizes the age-old hope that the couple would be as fruitful as the earth. In France, guests shower the bride and groom with wheat; in Morocco, with raisins, figs and dates. People clink glasses when they toast the bride and groom in order to produce a bell-like sound. (Bells, it was believed, were repellent to the devil). “The kiss” as a significant moment in the wedding dates from the Roman Empire. At that time, the bethrothal ceremony consisted of a kiss and the exchange of rings, with the kiss being the actual legal bond. The trousseau or dowry, was actually an early form of life BALL & FINE FURNITURE CLINTON, ONT • Free Layaway & Storage • Free Delivery OPEN6DAYS 9-6 EVENINGSBY APPOINTMENT insurance, since it was meant to ensure that the bride could survive withoutherhusband if the need arose. We wear the wedding ring on the third finger of the left hand because the pharoahs of Egypt believed a vein, the “vena amoris”, ran from that finger directly to the heart. The honeymoon began, when, in ancient marriages by capture, the groom kept his bride in hiding to prevent searching relatives from finding her. The word itself comes from the early Teutonic custom of couples drinking an aphrodisiacal honey drink for 30 days, or one cycle of the moon. MUTCH &