HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2007-05-24, Page 5THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, MAY 24, 2007. PAGE 5.
Bonnie
Gropp
TThhee sshhoorrtt ooff iitt
People have written Pulitzer Prize-
winning novels in less time than it is
taking Ontario’s Progressive
Conservatives to jot down a synopsis of
policies on which they will fight the October
10 election, but they are finally getting some
interesting ideas off their chests.
The Conservatives under leader John Tory
have been criticized for not having enough
policies close to an election. Premier Dalton
McGuinty’s Liberals have had tough times
recently for failing to protect against lottery
cheats and steering grants to immigrant
friends, but they are a long way from digging
their graves by themselves.
Tory has now responded to the issue of the
day, climate change, and promised targets
even earlier than the Liberals. He said he
would reduce Ontario’s greenhouse gas
emissions 10 per cent from their 1990 level
by 2020, which would be substantial,
because emissions have risen rapidly in 17
years.
The Conservative leader has set a further
target of a 60 per cent reduction by 2050,
although he will not be around to be held to
account for it. Maybe his grandson will be
premier.
Tory has promised stricter building codes
and incentives to prompt business and said the
province will contribute by using green power
for its buildings and getting rid of high-
emission vehicles.
Tory also has emerged as an enthusiastic
supporter of nuclear power, which he says is
cleaner and safer, and would reduce emissions
by using it more. This is a contrast to the
Liberals, who are being pushed reluctantly
toward more nuclear stations. Tory’s proposals
are short on penalties, but he says a basic
premise is polluters will pay.
Tory also says he would reduce toxins,
which contribute to many illnesses including
cancer, by requiring businesses to identify
high-risk chemicals they use and come up with
plans to replace or reduce them and receive
help including tax breaks.
Tory promises to do a better job of
managing taxpayers’ money. He is
emphasizing the Liberals have increased
annual spending by $20 billion since they
were elected in 2003, which sounds like they
have been advised by Conrad Black.
Tory cites as examples McGuinty’s use of
costly government planes, as if they were paid
for by frequent flyer points and unnecessary
redesign of the trillium emblem by an
advertising agency with ties to his party. He
says Conservatives would show respect for
taxpayers’ money.
Tory has said he will cut personal and
corporate income taxes “responsibly” and get
rid of the health tax the Liberals brought in
that raises $2.4 billion a year.
But apart from saying he will fight harder
for fairer healthcare funding from the federal
government, he has not said how he could
afford to do so without this money or what
services he would cut.
Tory favours residents being able to pay for
medical treatments in privately-owned clinics
through their government OHIP cards, where
this would avoid long, painful waits. Costs are
the same or less than in publicly-owned
facilities.
The Conservative leader would tackle rising
residential property taxes by capping
individual increases at five per cent a year,
which would please some, but merely
postpone their increases and meanwhile
transfer part of their burden unfairly to
others.
A major cause of the increases was former
Conservative premier Mike Harris’s
downloading of services on municipalities and
Tory says some of this was unfair, but has not
promised to have the province take them back.
Tory would move 10 per cent of government
offices from Toronto to smaller communities
to strengthen their economies and says
Toronto would not lose, because he would
fight harder for investment here.
Tory also would offer immigrants who now
flock to the Greater Toronto Area incentives,
including speedier immigration, if they settle
outside it – they might for a start also prefer
cheaper housing and less traffic.
These are not ideas that will start Ontarians
marching in the streets, but a few months
before an election they give them more to
think about.
Green at the top
Here’s a factoid to make you feel old:
Larry King has been on the air for half
a century. Fifty years we’ve been
watching and listening to the guy in the red
suspenders and the windshield-sized horn
rims talk to everybody from presidents and
prime ministers to pop phenoms and porn
stars.
Reclusive celebrities who will talk to no one
else show up like salivating lapdogs on the
Larry King show. Marlon Brando made a
grandiose (if largely incoherent) appearance,
as did the paranoically private Elizabeth
Taylor.
Every famous person eventually shows up in
prime time across the table from Larry. The
only celebrity he hasn’t booked is Osama Bin
Laden – and if the Saudi Arabian psychopath
ever does surface, don’t bet the family
silverware that he won’t do it in the guest chair
on the Larry King Show.
Now the tough part. I come to bury Larry,
not to praise him.
Well, not ‘bury’ exactly…but to ask a
pertinent question: How did this schlub
manage to become the most famous
interviewer in the world?
Larry King is, to put it bluntly, a terrible
interviewer. He doesn’t ‘interview’ his guests
– he plays patty-cake with them, tossing Nerf
ball, inoffensive, feel-good questions that
would make your Aunt Edna feel unthreatened
and at home.
Which, ironically, is the key to King’s
success. Famous people line up to appear on
the Larry King Show because they know
they’ll never be challenged, never be
embarrassed, never be asked to account for the
shortcomings in their public life or private
morals.
An appearance on The Larry King Show is a
PR cakewalk. A no-contest triumph. Larry
King will bend over backwards to make you
Look Good.
Which in turn makes Larry look like a
serious player in Olympus. You scratch my
back, I’ll massage yours.
Don’t know why we bought into it. There
are plenty of good interviewers around –
Charlie Rose, Peter Mansbridge, Robert
MacNeil, Jim Lehrer…
George Strombolopolopol – you know who
I mean.
And Oriana Fallaci. Ah, Fallaci.
She died last year, did Oriana Fallaci, still
fighting and spitting and clawing like the
wildcat she was. She weighed, maybe 100
pounds, soaking wet – even when she was full
of cancer. Stood about as high as your breast
bone.
She was a giant.
One time, back in 1969, this diminutive
Italian journalist found herself at Cape
Canaveral covering the return of the Apollo 11
space mission. She was in the post-mission
media scrum, jockeying with all the big,
beefy American media TV anchors as they
strove to get ‘face-time’ with the returning
astronauts.
The anchors were full of important,
stentorian-voiced technical questions along
the lines of: “Can you elaborate on the ratio of
the G-Force re-entry vectors vis-a-vis the
tectonic feedback during the lunar orbit
rendezvous” – that sort of thing.
The astronauts responded with highly
technological, exceedingly robotic answers.
Until Oriana Fallaci fought her way to the
front of the media scrum and snatched the
microphone.
“Yes,” said the emcee, “the, ah, little lady
from Italy…your question?”
And Fallaci fixed the astronauts with a
steely gaze and asked the three word question
that all the world wanted to hear the answer to:
“Were you scared?”
The astronauts fell apart. Hemmed and
hawed. The question wasn’t covered in their
Media Relations manual. Fallaci – in three
words – reduced them to humans.
Larry King – in 50 years of interviews –
never asked a question so pertinent.
And he probably never will.
His…blandness extends to his movie reviews
– to the delight of Hollywood. Hollywood
loves Larry because Larry loves Hollywood.
He’s always good for a good review.
Remember the universally panned You, Me
and Dupree? Critics hated it. Larry wrote
“Fun and Very Funny.”
Did you sit through the deadly dull De-
Lovely – a biography of Cole Porter? King
called it “Far and away the best musical
biography ever made!”
How about the laughably awful Two For the
Money? King called it “The best movie about
gambling ever made!”
King says: “I know (the movie makers) are
only looking for a catchphrase. If I like the
movie I give ‘em a quote. If I don’t like
something, I’m not gonna rap it.”
King is such a feel-good reviewer that even
his pans turn into raves. He saw the movie
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest
and confessed (uncharacteristically) “I had no
idea what was going on. I told…the studio, ‘I
didn’t understand the damn movie at all. I’d
have to see it over and over again to figure out
what happened.”
The studio ads quoted him: “Finally, a
Movie Worth Seeing Over and Over Again!”
Larry – of course -- didn’t mind.
You scratch my back, I’ll massage yours.
Arthur
Black
Tory getting election polices in place
Sometimes I even surprise myself. It was
a now moment — one of those times
when everything around me was so
perfect it was easy to shut away intrusive
thought.
Birds singing, sun shining, and me with
hands deep in dirt, could hardly let notions of
what might go wrong, or unsettling
conceptions of what has been sneak into my
easy mind. To say I was feeling pretty laid
back would be downplaying the condition
considerably.
It was probably the fact I was in this mellow
mood that brought about the realization that
followed. But, even in the days since, my
feeling hasn’t changed.
Let’s go back to the afternoon I was first
speaking about. The time, on this day, was
being spent in a worthy spring pursuit —
bringing colour to my private world by getting
my planters put together and into place. I was
as down to earth as one can get standing on a
deck.
A friend had joined me in the task, making
the going even more pleasant. Our busy hands
were rewarded for their efforts by the feel of
silken petals, textured leaves, the gentle give as
dirt and root pulled from the containers. Water
burbled in the fountain, and below the surface
of melody created by Michael Bublé and
Collective Soul pouring from the speakers.
Then from the adjacent schoolyard a bell cut
through the air, announcing recess. Exuberant
youth burst through the doors, lively and ready
to burn off some pent-up energy.
I was so into my project and the atmosphere,
grooving to the tunes and being outside,
burning off my own pent-up energy in my own
way, that I barely noticed the kids. They
blended into the picture already in place as if
they’d been there all along.
But my friend was watching them. And
came up with a most interesting statement.
Looking over at the boisterous scene, studying
the group as they shouted and played, she said,
“I’ll bet they’re looking over here and wishing
they were grownup.”
The truly strange thing about this moment
was I didn’t even say “Huh?”
I looked at those kids, with all their freedom,
their agility and innocence and felt not a breath
of envy. I wouldn’t give a bag of gumballs to
walk in those sneakers one more time.
Don’t get me wrong. I loved being a child. It
had its downside, but mostly what I choose to
remember is plenty of attention, a carefree
existence and fun to be found in just about
every corner. When I was little my parents
liked it if I slept in. They preferred I go outside
to play and stay out from under their feet. No
one wanted my opinion, so I wasn’t under any
obligation to have one. People looked after my
needs and saw to my welfare.
Nice then, but not again thanks. I was a little
shocked to discover I like not just being a
grown-up but being a middle-aged grown-up.
Every line on this face has been acquired by
living this life, whether by smiling, worrying
or lifting it to the sun. I may not know
everything, but I have acquired a certain level
of wisdom. Mostly, I have almost learned
what’s important and what isn’t.
Childhood is a wonderful time, there’s no
getting around it. But I have to tell you I was
very pleasantly surprised to see myself, now
firmly standing atop the hill, and in looking
back, seeing grass less green.
Other Views The man who would be king
Eric
Dowd
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