HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Brussels Post, 1978-10-25, Page 18IIIMUINELS
CIPITA1‘10
WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 1.7 1978
Serving Brussels and the surrounding community.
Published each 'Wednesday afternoon at Brussels. Ontario.
by McLean Oros„Poblishers Limited,
• •CNA
Subscriptions•(in advance) Canada $9.00 a Year. . •
Others $17,00 a Year. Single Copies 20 cents each.
Evelyn Kennedy Editor Pat Langlois - Advertising
Member Canadian Community Newspaper Association and
Ontario Weekly Newspaper Association
gBrussels Post
A good race .
With a lot of council members in neighbouring townships getting in
by acclamation it is interesting to note that the people in Brussels are
not so apathetic.
In fact with a race on for positions of reeve, councillors and PUC the
people of Brussels have shown that they're definitely interested in
what is happening to their village, and what elected officials do with
the positions they were entrusted with.
The people presently running for council have done a service to the
Brussels Community by letting their names stand as candidates so that
people now have a choice. We can vote in whoever we think will do the
best job for the village'.
But let's not stop there. Now that those people have offered their,
names as: candidates for the November 13 election it's up to the people
of Brussl",y) get oOland vote for' the people they**ant "to run the,
village's afifa'irs.''Ddn't jtist let theotheiguy do your for you. If'.
you want village operations to run' smoothly then it's up to you to cast
your ballot come election .day.
Council candidates have proven they're not apathetic to the village
situation, Now it's up :to the voters to do the same.
If ever there was a time when we needed a
few laughs in this country now would seem
to be it. The problem is, I'm not sure people
know what's funny anymore,
One of the great mysteries in life has
always •been what makes people laugh.
There's no hard and fast rule about
humour. Comedy is a matter of instinct,
usually; either you've got it or you haven't.
Unfortunately even those who haven't got it
try to fake their way through often with
excruciating results. No one without talent
would try to reproduce a painting of one of
the great masters and show it to the public,
but womehow a lot of people think they
should try to imitate Bob Hope as soon as
they stand up to say something.
One of the things one gets in this business
ofjournalism is a lot of evenings out to cover
banquets and such. Unfortunately nearly
every banquet comes with after dinner
speakers many of whom seem to do their
best to ruin the hard work of the ladies who
prepared the excellent meals in the first
place.
Somewhere along the line a lot of people
decided that if they were going to say "a few
words" at a meeting of any sort, they had
better add "a little humour". Unfortunately
too often there is indeed little humour in'
what they have to say. You know how it
goes. The speaker gets up and says thank
you for the invitation, remarks then
says-"That reminds me of a little story."
What reminded him of the little story I've
never yet figured out because 99 time out of
100 there is absolutely no connection
between what he was talking about before to
What the story is about.4
Now it's a very traumatic experience
getting up in front of an audience as anyone
who's ever tried it knows. You can ramble on
and get what you have to say said as quickly
as possible so you can sit down or you can try
to imitate all those , good speakers you've
seen over the years. They look so relaxed,
like they're almost enjoying it..They make
the audience enjoy it 'too,. coming up with
witty comments well delivered.
Most of us amateurs want to be like those
old pros but we haven't got either the ,
experience or the talent to do so. I know the -
feeling of terror getting up before 'people..
My own urge is to write out -the whole speech
before hand then read• it off as quickly: as
possible all the time looking down at the
paper so I won't see anybody out there. Bin
being conscientious, we usually try to giVe
that little extra. That means, of course
throwing in that famous "little it of
humour" to lighten - the situation.
But if there's one thing worse than getting
up in front of a crowd in the first place, it's
giving your little joke and either not having
people - laugh or hearing that hesitant
nervous little la ugh that tells you everybody'
just being polite. When that happens, you
want to suddenly develop an instant case of
laryngitis and have to go immediately home
to bed.
A lot of people have come up with a
somewhat sure fire answer to the whole
mess, They're not going to take a chance on
their jokes bombing so they decide to do the
one thing that will always get a response
from the audience: they tell a slightly off
colour joke...or maybe more than slightly off
colour. At least half the audience will laugh
at a dirty joke even if they won't laugh at a
clean one. The other half will go along
because they don't want anybody to think
they didn't get the joke, even if they're
secretly appalled.
Then of course there's the joke that is
adapted to fit someone prominent in the
audience, often the chairman for the
evening, Half the time i by the time the
tenuous connection between the victim of
the joke and, the circumstance of the joke is
explained, I couldn't care less about the rest
of the joke.
And there's the other old standy-by, the
ethnic joke. Some speakers make a habit of
these following a Jewish joke with an Irish
joke with a Newfie joke with a Paki joke etc.
I guess I'm just too sensitive but they leave
me a little uncomfortable. There's nothing
funnier than listening to an Irishman tell
jokes on fellow Irishmen, or a Scot on Other
Scots of a Jew on his own race, but somehow
they don't seem funny when told by
members outside the race.
You can't really blame people for trying
hard to be funny and not really knowing
what's funny anymore. The biggest source
of humour (?) these days is television and
that's enough to make anyone wonder
what's funny. I've sat through some shows
that were supposed to be riotously funny and
found perhaps one good line in a half hour.
But the audience is supposed to be loving it.
That "audience" of course, consists of
taped laugh track that laughs, whenever the
producer of the show wants a laugh. It must
be great to be a writer on one of those shows:
no matter how bad the joke you can always
get a laugh by simply writing instructions in
the script where the laughs should come.
These tricks of the trade are undermining
our whole sense of humour just when we
need it most. Laugh tracks should be banned
in television and if people want laughter in
the sound tracks of shows, they should tape
all shows in front of live audiences. If the
writers and actors can make real people
laugh then they've earned their money. If
they have to resort to a laugh track then
they're' just encouraging non-funny people
tothink they can do as good as what they see
• on television.
Behind the scenes.
We need a few laughs
By Keith Boylston
-1Sugar and Spice
by Bill Smiley
by pill Smiley
.If you have ever bought, or borrowed, a
copy of Maclean's magazine, you have
probably been subjected, in the past month
or so, to the .same treatment I have, a
variation on the Chinese water torture,
Every second day I have received a card, or a
phony-looking certificate, or a sincere letter,
telling me 'of the fabulous bargains in
subscriptions I can receive if I sign up right
now,
Heck, for only $19,95 ($52.50 at news-
stand), 1 can receive 70 issues of Maclean's,
PLUS a 10 per cent guaranteed lifetime
savings, PLUS a full-color 78/79 calendar.
It's a great piece of hucksterism, And with a
good reason. If you don't get them
Subscribers, you don't get ads, and ads is
what a magazine gets rich on, not readers,
And i can understand the slight note of
desperation in the mail campaign. The first
few issues of "Canada's Weekly Newsmag-
itie " were not exactly swollen with
advertising, There were Six to eight
lull-page ads, mostly liquor and cigarettes; a
few half and quarter-pages, a couple Or three
seft•promotional pages all this out Of 57
pages total. Not enough money thereto pay
'for the coffee breaks of about 40-odd 8ditors,
a gaggle of researchers, correspondentS,
photographers and editorial assistaiits, it is
'to tremor with fear.
Not that is would bother me for more than
' one minute and a half if Maclean's went
belly up. It's a fat, rich corporation, with
many irons in the fire, most of them highly
profitable.
Through a judicious combination of
whining and poisonous nationalism,
Maclean's managed to convince the Cana-
dian government of the necessity to kirk out
of the country its only real competition, Time
magazine and Readers' Digest.
Not have I any reason to wish the new
weekly newsmagazine ill. I have an old and
honorable association with the Magazine and
its sister, buxom with advertising, Chatelaine
The latter has become, from tenuous, wispy
beginnings, about as good a magazine- as a
women's magazine can get,
My association with this pair began at a
tender age, about 10, when I received a
contract to go Out and hustle up subscribers
to either or both of theSe mags. 1 was a, lousy
salesman then, and still am ; and it was
Depression years, but as I recall, I sold two
subscriptions to Chatelaine and one to
Maclean's, to friends of my mother. I
received $1,50 in cenitnissionS, and that was
the end of a potentially great career in
publishing:
Of eourse, in those days, a kid didn't have
a chance against the pros.
Maclean's, and other publishing chains,
would send into a small town a highly-
trained team of hustlers to sell subscriptions.
They were fait talking, much like the
encyclopedia salesmen of a couple of
decades later.
They'd hit the town like a hurricane. about
Tuesday, and depart Friday afternoon ,
laughing like open drains, with alot of loot,
leaving behind them a host of housewives
wondering vaguely why they had signed up
for eight years of Maclean's and sixteen
years of Chatelaine, even though it hadn't
cost them a cent, ha' ha.
However, I am willing to let old business
animosities lie. If Maclean's leave me alone,
I'll do the same for them;
Let's take an objective look at' their
newsmagazine, the non-pareil, according to
them: It's not bad, really.
There is a strong tendency to be smartass,
as in this opening sentence, "The CBC is the
oldest whore on the block," Somebody
trying to imitate Time magazine's style.
But, on the whole, the mag isn't bad.
Considering the tribulations of putting out a
weekly magazine in an age in Which
everything is instant dead two minutes after
it's been seen on 'DV, there is a fairly good
analysis of provincial and federal neWS and
adequate coverage of international new, and
a few good features. One of them is
interesting enough, visually and verbally,
but bears the dreadful cliche "People" 'as its
heading.
There's a lot of cutesy business of printing
over yellow and purple and orange, which is
juvenile and slightly annoying.
But there is some first-class writing.
People like Barbara Atniel and Mordecai
Richler and Allan Fotheringham seldom put
a foot wrong. The last of those is an abrasive
columnist from Vancouver who recently
suggested that the Toronto Argonauts and
the Federal Liberals were utterly interchang-
eable, and that if the Argos backfield were
running the country, nobody would notice
the difference—a nice commentary on bOth.
Perhaps the magazine is happiest, so far,
in its comments on the arts and entertain-
ment. Thisis where Canadians shine; we are
a nation of critics, whether we know
anything about the subject or not.
It is rather weak on sports, but then sports
'are awfully dead, except for color. stories,
once the burly-burly's o'er,
On the Whole, let's give the thing a chance,
for a month or two. But no way am I going
to sign up for 70 issues. How do I get my
money back if I die be they go broke in the
next two weeks.