HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Brussels Post, 1977-08-24, Page 74110.....1•0000110..
...Sugar and Spice
by Bill Smiley •
A great many People look down their
lioses at the game of golf. Scornfully they
ask: "How can an adult with a mind walk
around a few acre of manicured pasture
hitting a little white ball with a long
stock?"
And I am inclined to agree with them.
It's a silly game and at least once a week
determine that I'm going to quit.- But it's
just about as easy to quit golf as it is to quit
smoking.
It's a game that reduces strong men to
tears of impotent rage and turns honest
women into cheats who move their ball
from a bad lie when nobody is looking.
Even the parlance of the game is
ridiculous, combining terms from the
butcher shop (hook, slice, shank) with
those from an aviary (birdie, eagle) and
those from a horror movie (bogey, sc ull).
It's an expensive game. Membership in
a club can run from $300 a year to' $5,000 or
more. Even the basic equipment can easily
run to $500 for clubs, cart, bag, shoed.
Those who don't belong to a club can
pay as you go, eight or JO dollars a round,
and add to that three $2 balls lost in the
bush and a couple of' drinks in- the club
house and you're getting up around $20 for
four hours of muttering at - a little ball,
pursuing a little ball, and : occasionally
hitting that little ball ' so sweetly that
nothing can quite compare with the
feeling, and you are hooked all over again
on this silliest of sports.
Cometo think of it, golf isn't a sport, any
more than chess is. It's more like a way of
life. And there are a lot worse Ways of life.
Fora teenager, once bitten by the bug, it's
like a disease. B ut a kid who has played 27
or36 holes of golf on a Saturday is not very
likely to be out smashing windows in the
local school on Saturday 'night. He's too
pooped.
For the old-timer who plays nine holes
every day with his foursome of cronies; it's
a lot better life than sitting around the
Legion Hall or the beVerage room grousing
about the government.He . still has a
challenge.. He knows perfectly well that
one of these days, if the wind is right, his
arthritis isn't acting up, and the dam' club
will connect with the dam' ball often
enough, he can bring his score down equal
to his age.
An 80-year-old can still play golf and
enjoy it, but you don't see too many of
them surf-boarding or parachute jumping.
Of course, it's an evil game. It've heard•
it rumored that there is sometimes betting
involved, especially among the older' guys,
sometimes staggering wagers` of as much
as a nickel a hole.
And then, of course, it's a dangerous
game, physically, emotionally and
psychologically. You can be thumped on
the head by a golf ball travelling about 300
miles an hour.
You can be struck by lightning right at
the top of your backswing, if it's storming.
Some golfers have gone into sand, raps and
never been seen again.
Emotionally, it can turn a calm college
professor, the epitome of reason,, into a
raging maniac who is capable of throwing
all his clubs into a water hazard and
stalking from the course, purple-eared. I
'have seen one of the .sweetest-natured
chaps I've ever known, after hitting the
ball three yards three times in a row,put
his foot in.the middle of a perfectly good,
four wood, bend it double, and hurl the
crippled club deep into the nearest woods.
I have heard a poised young matron, a
regular church-goer, using language on the
golf course that would curdle the blood of a
drunken Danish seaman.
And if the game doesn't sc ar you
physically and/or emotionally, it will
probably. destroy you psychologically.
There are 40 people watching as you take
your three practice swings, each one a
marvel of symmetry, a machine that is
grooved and oiled.
You step up to the hall and hit it 60 yards
:Straight up and 20 feet ahead of you. Or
right over the fence on to the road. or
straight into the woods. While the gallery
snickers discreetly and you desperately try
to grin n onchalently.
It can get worse. Your wife, whom you
can outdriye by 60 yards, steps up and hits
a beauty right down the middle, and then
gives you one of those looks. Marriages
may be made in heaven, but they can
become unmade on a golf course.
Golfers do have a couple of things
going for them. For one thing, they're
extremely generous. They'll, tell you,
without charge, ,what is wrong with your
backswing, your downswing, your stance,
y our grip and the kind of balls you are
using.
For another, they're tough. They
wouldn't think of walking to church in the
rain, Nit they'll play 18 holes in a 'torrent.
On sultry summer days when people are
dropping with heat Stroke, and on cold fall
days when people are huddled by the
fireplace, the golfers are out there, hacking
and hewing around the course.
Well, there yo'u are. The game is silly,
expensive, evil, and dangerous. Golfers
run the risk of being scarred for life in one
or more ways and should be locked up for
their own safety. I'm definitely going to
quit.
And yet ... And yet...The other day I
had three good drives. Tuesday my putting
was improving. Wednesday I'd have had a
birdie if I hadn't hit the tree. Yesterday I
was chipping well,
I think maybe I'll give her one more go.
It's all got to come together one day.
Surely.
4'
Milk is
an easy
nutritional
winner
A recent news release froM the
()Mario Milk Marketing Board contained an interesting
comparison of the nutritional
value of milk and soft drinks.
The study identified how well
each drink met recommended
daily intake for feniale aged 0, to 15.
16 cents worth of 2 percent milk
•• supplied 12 per cent of the
calories, 42 percent of the Protein;. 74 percent of the calciut i 18 percent of the Vitam A, 18 percent of the ttliatrilii, '61 percent of the tibotiaviti„ and; 160
'percent of the Vitamin De
30 cents worth of soft driiik
supplied Mpeteetit of the calories and 0 petted of all the Other
nutrients that had been supplied in the 2 percent milk,
O )
Its that, time of year
• When children 'cry and mothers cheer
So hurry in and don't be late
At George of Brussels set the date
. For the latest cuts in hair
With bi'and new styles that 'have a flair
And while you are waiting here
We'll put another hole in your ear.
We do ear piercing in gold, silver &
birthstone studs. Now only $10 at
George of Brussels.
Mothers 'don't forget
to make back to school
hair 'appointments.
• Back to Schopi,Specig
eOrge
887-6751
russels
(By Wilma Oke) )
The Huron-Perth County
Roman. Catholic Separate School
Board will provide a van to
transport a handicapped student
within the system, who is.
permanently confined to a
wheelchair.
The van has.been purchased at
a cost of $7,233.75 from
McLaughlin Ford , Motors,
Seaforth, talong with a hydraulic
loading device 'to be installed by
Gold Line Conversion of London
at a cost of $f,822.70. A' grant
from the Ministry of Education
provides, the funds for this
purchase. '
At the meeting held in Dublin
Monday night the trustees
learned that there has been a roll
back by'the anti-inflation board of
the 1977-78 salary schedule for
the teachers because it exceeded
the guideline. The roll back
amounts to,„58 per cent reducing
the maximum compensation
increase to six per cent.
The, board approved a vVage
increase for the clerk-typists in
the schools of four per cent,
giving them $4.36 per hour,
effective September 1. '
The eight drivers of the board
owned buses have been• awarded
an increase of $1.00 per day for
the 188 day school year, giving
them approximately $17. per day.
,Terry Wilhelm, has'been hired
to teach Grade 8 at St. Boniface
School, .Zurich; Agnes Gaffney
will teach kindergarten' at St.
Joseph's School, Clinton (50 per
cent); Mrs. Mary , Kinahan,
Wingham has been advanced
from teaching 50 per cent to full
time; and Herman Koert will be
transferred from St. Boniface
School, Zurich, to 60 per cent at
St. Patrick's School, Kinkora and
40 per cent at St. Mary's School,
Hes son..
The Ministry of Education has
informed'the board that it will be
included in the Western Ontario
regional office located in London
beginning at the end of the year.
The board was formerly with the
Waterloo regional office but it has
now been eliminated along with
two others .in the province,
reducing the nine regional offices
to six. This Western Ontario
region has as its eastern
boundary the counties of Grey,
Bruce, Huron, Perth, Oxford and
Elgin extending to the lake and
Windsor.
The board approved payment
of $300 for professional services
for advisory officers when hiring
supervisory officer in July -
account with Traversy and
Weinreb firm of barristers,
Toronto.
The meeting adjouirned at 10:30
p.m. and the next meeting is
September 12.
J.E. LONGSTAFF
- OPTOMETRIST -
SEAFORTH 527-1240
Tuesday, Thursday, Friday
9:00 - 5:30
Wednesday, Saturday
9:00 -12:00
CLINTON 482.7010
Monday 9:00 - 5:30
By Appointment.
THE BRUSSELS. POST , AUGUST 24, 1977 —7
Huron Perth
• board buys van
Watch
for
the
opening
.•of the new
Walton
otiety..
Coming Soon