HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron Signal, 1884-7-25, Page 71
PHI HURON SIGNAL FRIDAY, JULY 25, its.
Fun an rancv.
'Have you,' asked the Judge of • roe
at t11.17 olatricted men, 'a•ythlog to offer
tI a Court before mentenoe 1s passed 1
'14u, your honor, replied the prisoner,
'my lawyer book my lest moot.'
'Isaias,' slid Mr. 0 Rafferty, wee
sw discussing the find old da 'the
papas who heed is the wurrai whin
tl ere was net a single livid' noel w the
h co of the earth had the best time of A
that I sea ioarioa.'
)ineewoe says • mai ought to carry •
rabid lied note down the thoughts of
the tltensewt. Yes, and one short pencil
devoted excls.ivel to that use, would
Wit epos wen we knew about two thous-
and years, and then have the original
point on.
'What u the price of axle grew r
•s- head a new clerk of a grocery dealer ;
'There is no mark on it.' 'It depends uo
your customer. 1f he asks or axle -
gimes charge him fifteen ants a pound,
t et if he wants butter, make it thirty-
eight omits.
At an evening party one of the guests
) reserved a strict silence, no matter
what might be the subject uf conversa-
tion. Theodore Houk at last advanced
to him and aid : '14 you are a tool you
are win man ; if you are a wins man you
are a foot.
.'O�nlly a mattes* that cueoeru tramps.'
sheer-'
tramp laws, and arrests.
' you weer mew misuse r
'Never.'
'New 'sleben r
'Nu, Nr even if I Rut
'New hat'
'Nu'
'Whynot r
'I'd srruatud for thief the first
store r.bbbed.
'W het dors a tramp mon want 1'
'To lie left aloes.'
'Do you c.,usi,ler Oust the world owes
you a las lull '
'Oh, u...'
'Why 1.1,1 r
'Wouldn't be any fun getting it. •
'How do you consider u r
'The world owe" no man anything,but
the smartest gets the wed the easiest.'
•Sujp.ioe the world diel ..we each amu
• living f'
'Why, then, we'd ha... t •n times wore
tramps.'
'diad for yolk i'
'I ghoul.: smile.'
'Anybody worse off than tramps 1
'Plenty.
•\Vhat becomes of tramps !'
'They get obi if thty'ru not kin%.'
'Neter die r
'Not natural deaths.'
'How iathat 1
'em
honest.
There comes a time in every little
girl's life when she u seized with a long-
ish' to Deal. -{Erect Poet. And there
goose a time m every girl's life when
she u seized with • longing to hire twine -
body else to cook. It comes after she
gin mafwid.
'Hello, Johnny, where've you heen all
•
a
THE SIGNAL
~MP Isar
Porton is Or.t -S . per 1 oases W
mew.tttStMra1>va MTIeh.17 ardentw•
rJ e
ideref-
bee 1. ui4d5. label 1. .
Priam IAwarP IslscdStwfomu d
sad la.
a1) esus received tp'ter II,e trsulut meet
pest agar savings' beak '•et r •. a the bears
Z.... sag CM P m• r.; 1{,•.laatea
assist red Iselers Mist I•err
bebrs the data M savh ria 1.
OAkr hours {a.m. to 9:10 Pa. Sundays es -
tamed.
11011.10%11011.10%w NMT Alit.
Cat••t'
hs. isay been wino, ted into , • Par
gal l'u •.. ' "•' I. • re-ertefYNlaeat of postal
.• •'*
fur .
!kilt.111:11•1•114.'!w, lm••omwriUlMaltar,
110 PI • • tWein. t... oast
1 thrum. Italy, les -
esthete
heels u arui relaid. N.threauel. Nor-
br Ileldm, l#oaleesero•
WiLL BE BENT TO
'A healthy tramp's dirty and °attracts
Ice disease. Besides, he's no wear and
tear of brain.'
'Filth a prevention of disease
'Certainly. Did you ever see a sick
dirty than i'
• Are they scarce r
'As dead mules'
'How are tramp made.'
w rr 1 Agora*. Roumania.
Itou pt.
Portugal.
Wit. Prem•. r°enla. tl(miu, the l'aaerJ
(.d•uds. Sweden. riwilseriaad mud Turkey.
And . i Called State.: Rermnda. 1 abJob'.
Cabe Itanlab7'utoulesef : nTe Porto Rim.
116 Croix. Jamaica.
NewfoudYud is mow In thelrumal Caton,
lost the postal rotes remain sebeforel Letters
Saints per 4 ouwcr. Postal cants 1 cents race.
New.W$•'rs 2 cents for 1 tome. LFR
Ices fee cents.
For .t . Argentine t'onfederat Wu. Brasil.
BAC..., swims. Ceylon. Greenland.
Colonies in Asir. AMca• lk sulks mid Auger-
ica. except St. Pierre uelon. Penna.
vialweiaOltlf. Port u(uesel'u oases its Asia.
Africa. 1kr•nnkka. rri,.i.lr't....vanish Colombo;
les A'►i.a. Meanies and t mees, evept Yuba
and ionts In Sigma-
. Penang sto Rico. d Tlwls �•wl': I Letters 14. per
ok Hooks, lice, lc. for 1 ux. ipilwr registra-
tion r,•:. tic.
\t e., tali& Idolainevia
'� Halifax. stomp le 04*Rtteso
formerly. . sexce New South \t ales• \SIC -
A u). and
tuurpt A
tonal. at►d t}'tarnsl•nd :-Lsttt:ra :c-. poen
4 Dente. Wales. V
Australia. New !butt
Queensland : Letters lie.. aspen k -
New %wood. via Pan Francisco: -Lettere
Ile. Sc., papers
Alonoet gem pili ..etaie•e.lnalain.a i
Warr mineral ewepoonde. Dr. Oarww'a
Stomach Bitters to purely veritable sod
takes the piece of ell ,•cher pa,gatir.a
lu I..tge bid threat 50 uwi' en
Thousands bees w'tnO4. W Um POO -
tire ot:rstivi powers of the U &lT Gas -
r•11 1arwu0AToa, tee' only ready that
has proved alt• f • •pecitic for Emend
debtliy, w•uunal wrakut»a, iwtNde eT,
etc., and all disease that &rine froom
the morning r asked one urchin of anoth- 'In two ways.'
lir a he appeared in the .chool-room dor- 'The tneoomes a tram tint
int; the afternoon mention. Been fish- I P
to ,' was the rejoinder. 'Ketch any- generally through misfortune. It s nicer
thing 4' 'Yes, • tickle',' and the second deliberate.'
'And then T'
chat in geography .food up.
II 'In • few ears he gets so used to it
Impoveriahetterimtocrat-'What dish, { y
waitah, combines the greatest ah, luxury I that he wouldn't do without it.'
'The second way r
with the least expense?' Waiter -"Cod -
'Disappointed foreigners. They get to
fish and cream-6item. cents' I. A.- America thinking they'll find gold iu the
'And bow much fur the codfish, ah, street. They tulip up,and thea drift
plain r Waiter -'Same price, air.' /.1 about the Gauntry witthe crows,'
A. - \�•aitah, bring me some, ah I 'What of your future m'
cream.' 'I'II live lona on the tramp, and finally
The intellect that directs the bee lines die happy.'
in Life. +Inder the caption .•f "H'.w to. 'And th'
Handle Rees,' mays a bee is not a very 'Why, AlI'laro a volunteer for some dia-
difli_olt thing to handle. He is as easily .acting t&ble.'
ppies ed up as a strawberry. i. reasonably , .For ecienee r
hgln and compressible. To handle him I .Yes • I'll be of some service, anyhow.'
is, therefore, a mere song. Any man can I 'You maid tramps never die.
do It. 111 fact the more ignorant of I 'Se I did. I meant they never die
bee. a :-...t. Is tho more wily he an young. Generally they are killed oaths
handle ••:.•• The main difficulty amelia tailr.ad, or smothered in iron furnaces,
to be is. ,tutetito:, the main down after he
handled A soillin bet frolicsome bee.
There have been men known to race
around a 10 acre lot, and eventually
I. De their ea•vatism, after handting one
hee fur the tenth part a second
or near limekiln'.
'Do tramps he e
'Do tuarmea, or lees, or showmen, Gr
newspapers
'As much as any others, except preach -
What the country really needs is an am..
article ,.,, how t 3 avoid handling .Do you ever go to church 7'
bees. ' 'Look at iny wardrobe.'
•Did you ever hear a sermon r
'Yes, in jail, f.re years ago.'
'Do you do any good t'
I 'Yee, when I get anything to smoke.'
A Is, .....• -headed, elderly -linking sun- ' .csg,,,1 ..
browned usan was lying sleeping under a 'Why, tirtakt, cetteinly,'
black *low+ hat. a heti% y cane, and his . ber tramp lit ht. cizar and enjoyed it with
greasy -1. oking black knapsack. He was all the ease airs contentment ..t a million-
& trawl,. aire, iu d The last the hunter saw of him
r , iks oe turned for the last time was the
ped x! a hunter's feet. The tramp ' tramp in a wreath of stnekteurling about
was a*..kened by the noise.' . his head. happy as • king.
'Beg pardon for disturbing you, said i
The gunner put his pigeon in his game! We have mad ',1 wo'kl•-'1 10eds. 80 per -
tramp, sitting up.
fectly made a. to deceive the husband -
bag. eat on a rock, and the following talk
man. But thei i lisCer nits one so per -
HOW THEY LIVE.
Veld -
‚sot es
Liao
ty
7
TrY b•
•
1 Os
ANY ADDRESS
abuse or t..vrt..aed bras, IutrUy
in consumption, intend d l • pietn•-
Inv.. crave Sold by all arultgt•u, or
will be rut free ssa re•elpl of VIA* per
h. a, or Sill Iwlzes fur ill& •amu.••. V��
�tYbytheuseoftb stress
Culver, Toltdo, Ohio, wile agent for
illcand testi• •nits ( gamine curer (.uo GERMAN INVIGORATOR,
tthyuas. ll :detach. 3
I"`°'I'x°s fes.
B RITISH Asa COY, Tower*, -fid
llei
P II(EXIINS..d
NNIXeO YY. of 14 0P
NAItT1 t fl &IY. of N•wJ firb
Katabilabed •M
Maks takes in .k above Srst •
Mu lowing raise by NORACfi 11,0111�f If
Tae nur'1 eertlwis aloes Aprr0Mso
cANADA PM. WAN sou SAVINGS CO. e
Toau0tu. security. reel
{loamy is Lias esp•tgSa u•�rate.
7 to •par unrest. C RoKAI'It NORTON•
Ooder'-h 8aet• 1r. I{IM.
-Tholouedeuf grieves
are manually robbed
of 11,.•te victims.Ilvee
wad health natww
"1 ant toning; up the r.-.•• -rr, remark•
ed a tint tenor, as he bno,4e.1 hiring!
and made a wild etfolt t., rc:.•' m high C.
r
which positively moo permanent y cures
lbw
pa noel leausrd by e,emees, of any kind,'
e& N',yknees, and all duras0 lbmt Ad -
Da. Low's t'LaA0AMT WOKS ST SEP - bpi as a .Foment*, tot Pelf .Abu.»r. I's less of en-
arg�•Muse of rpenuM7. uei.clw*i :mssUS4S.
An agreeable. safe and effectual remedy paiu•ill the tack. dInu1••s ,. t:a:ta', pt'sM-
In tune old ag,•. al:d many ••thcr I*,o.5s.
to remove mil kinds of Nortum eat
ka'170Immo Ity cr.etc co.*"hi , and • PT*d-
_-�- 1 we 1rr•• F. limg
respite ,tend for circular. *Hh testimonials tree
A 4R a•vlaaje' bolo nail. rhe 1\TI.NN%Tran 1. sold a/ Ms K
E. . ARis..n, Hutchlt.> •'• , s h ..'r rix 10 o s fur {•). by alt drtiZ�l
Mr. M. Aet•urelY sealed, r
lasted him life by a simple Trial t:o.ttle .rt w 1p�' sent
J. b' mA'treelPr
Dr. King's New Discovery, for Con-- F. J. t•1*"S1•:Y. 1•r• volimt,
Is: ru:u,atl SI., Toler' 0. Ohio
roelptlee, which caused him to procure r IlrtvrA►.
Ili o but tie. that ruwpletely cured eine Ow. Sole At., fur (;oderich
WWI INVIory chit•ge of climate and -.
tperything else Niel failed. .1stlove.
acts mti+. Niemen -ea. NM%r:te Co11411l,,
S� 1,11 ''Least *tool i.uug thrt•nteir, It m
truannterd to cure. Trial Bottle. at J.
drug stole. Large Pine 1711. (1).
v
1.• are always ow the look
ant h•^ fiancee re twereaes
caralthy •t1'th limo lbs.
ose who ds
come., wealthy
no improve their opportwn
- t Nkr trauma ' Wse�S Ae _ wo
akmluF to mak0 lemur, •Nork torous !'a,th.'Z
omen. buys and girls
A f�gtreaeMGeaK• Anyone can do the week .
- Ir. \IAIv A.11.•iley,of Tuukhanm•ck. pe lylfrrom the ant star;. 'ft: `-
d pay u1ae thin. ,. a llul.w , . .1.•' wags&, kx-
1 1. c ODIC whn ea -
..'titttr•rt for was pats with Ash-
'tr•.ucluu., duriuz wh1ch tune
t lest l.hy.ies pis anuli give nn relief.
llcr life wars dt•••(•rinvl of, until in last
October else procured a bottle of Dr.
King's New Discovery, when immediate
for a short time also *an comnplet.•ly cur -
pensive mule, Io: mr'•i.e.
dares tails to nlmle toe.. • i. t tai;• . N. 1Wcualn.
get ole your w1•nle mil. It•:nIthe * CI.. ('n Mn4
your .tare '0IstPO -Os. sent 1.'. *. Ai ,1rca'' et IN
all that is neural ,.
WS r Co Portland. Nmtne-
relief was felt, and by continuing its nae t i'
The subscriber ..t now prepared I.
to furnish all kiwis of tebl and ed, gaining to de,h ••1) use. 1.1 •t fewt' r eve. .td for any retie
Garden i�c1m of the i months Comm . r 1t�•i••li
Free Trial Bottles of thia certain_ cure
BEST VARIETIES of all Throat and Lune Diseases at rates tbat cannot be beaten in Wilaoit's Drug Ston. Loge Bottles
FROM THE
,, will Lay err •k Hedathe,
Liter l mirin i m 11T•1'rt woe• t, veils pia
indisrstirw. to.
01.2)7407 curt- ariaN'erd's "' cgt'taldc 1 ‘s tfpllls,
when the •lIr•r t woe are srk•tl) ti'114 .1t0 vat
a.
They ole purely Vegetable. and never�fpyf t
Ro
i • c met h m floe. t4 1. •trtcst..1 one
containing 1) P:UM. SI t'r'ot"• Tur wale by a1
1)rex-• tie. Rewire of counterfeits sad intim-
) . .. .'ane n•cnmufaciwtd only tit- - -- ur17 Y.kar�
fore purchasing elsewhere. .• 1..duari t• 1-nT •
anti examine samples I e- PM *he lite
• this Blois Ililters the paper i / 4:r Oak at 1111.148lili gotta ger•1111L
REES PRICE.
East Street Grain Depot, t/pp, -.to iY '" lunch *bunt. Indeed indeed
Town Hall, Goklerich. • thankful ec should be f. r that I
The Ontario Itatnal
took place :
long r
'Ten years or more.'
'Because I don't like to work.'
'How do you get food
'From women 1'
- 'Always from men r
°They frighten two easily.'
`Do men eter refine r
"Very seldom.'
'Do you ever ask for money ?'
'Ever get any r
'Sometimes, when I ask men
'How's that r
'Men melt easy.'
'Men not as clew am women r
'Not when 1 touch eon.'
'Their hearts. by &eking for bread.'
'That's a scheme, is it r
anaanolial
'Do you drink
'All tramps do --when they can.'
'When r
'Only at night.'
'Why at night r
'Nothing else to do.'
'Why not drink in the day
'How's that r
.stronq bresth kills the business.'
'N.. isms givea to a man who smells of
'That's why you drink at night ?'
'Clothes r
'They're easier getting than grub.'
'Wet's the hardest to !set r
'What is the best way to win women r
fectly niade as t.. decelie the no
True art resembles good company. It
' compels us. in tile moat delightful man-
' ner, to admit the extent to which our
inward faculties have been cultivated.
Let the young man who intends fol.
; lowing • profession mak- the money
I antutsition idea a subordinate one, and
take no counsel of mere ni-iney chang-
1st of AUGUST,
If the truth 'wen. known it would
doubtless' lie found that a vicious juvenile
literature is largely responsible for the
formation ot characters of the Jesse James
If a onus is to lie what he ought to be,
for his powers mind be brought up together,
by giving due attention vial, and undue
; attention to none of the God-given con•
I atituents 01 his losing,
St) far as material comforts are con -
man that lie has not done for ante and
monkeys. except to give him not only
the desire but &leo the capacity for end
lam improvement.
Gambling goes on day and night in
rivet* clnbe awl caminots,and it undoubt-
edly occasionally has very unfortunate
results ; but it A no more immoral to in-
dulge in the habit in such places than it
A on the stock etchantre.
turned. the ( reator has dose nothing for
Witty sayinirs are as easily lost as the
pesos slipping off • broken string ; but a
word ef kindness ie meldom spoken in
vain. It is • seed, which, even when
dropped by chalice, springs up into a
It is not eneugh to give special infor-
mation, ard to tit the student for engag-
ing in this or that money -making Dun-
nage. Above and beyond, before and
under and throueh all ear+ utilitarian
ends, there should be kept alive the
higher mot tress end the larger intellectual
life.
Sir Roger L'Fatrange my& 'there are
' won in the world lea well to
TO
LIFE ASSUR VsICE 00.
HEAD OFFICE, - WATERLOO. 0
The People's Lively
The only purelv Mutual I.ife Co. in Canada.
Total nionlyer of Policies in for..e. MM.
Hag 5.241. covering assurance i o toe amount,
of 116.572.719.00.
TOTAL RICA/OWE. eivis.cis.tie
Tho Company s Reser% es are leased on the
"Actuaries Table of Mortali.r.- and four per
by any life company in amide. and one•bal
r cent. h• her than the standard used by the
Modulen wittrance pa .
The increasing popularity and rao'd growth
or the Company may be men (nun the tact
that in 1870. the first year of izq businees. ths
total sweets amounted to only 90.210. while Wit
ier.3. they reached the handiowe total ad
70S.00. WM- HENDRY. Manager.
ROM INS. General Agent.
Stratford. Ont.
irAn active and reliable District Agent
wanted for tioderich and West Huron. Apply
to W. S. HOMINS. General Agent. Stratford.
MCMotter to Loan at I.c.w Rat( of Interest. I
1st JANUARY
I. P. FISHER JCIMIENOI,1
Having purchanori the Livery business of Jno.
Sham of public pairinuige. They
mno-.• sat Isfact len to ail. zed ()tiler
'The Flu:Lest Rigs
at which perilous of e., her sex. young
or old. can make great pay all the time they
work. with absolute certainty. write for full
particulars to 0. HALLETT tt• CO., Portland.
Moine. lidt-
Or
R. PROUDFOOT
...Just received his Spring Stock of I
DM' (1101S anti Groutie,s.1
All are New mid Well Selected. which I e of.
fent av the Lowest Possible i'r14-eg.
A LAO
Hap's. Bacon. Lard. luo•ese. Roller Flour -
inside from Manhole. W oat. Mot Harris'
i Fine Family Flo.,ii.' 'Ind Us's. Bran.
Shorts. arid all tole- k, oda Of rfed.
Goods dent ered fri e any part of the tow•
and Ashford. •
Comer Victoria and Nelson streets. oppositi
Fair °rounds. (toilet ich.
1111:$7. • guaranteed epeeifk. for Hy
Nervorm Prostration awed
inir In Insanity rinilatinj TO ralserr. demi
and Prernottorrhera. canoed
of the ',rain. self-a`ouse cr et
Ono box will cure recent eared. lexelliditt
tains oar month's treatment. One d•Bar a box
or Mx boxes for eve dollars : sent by bpail pte
rmid on receipt or price. We guarantee six
boxes to cure soy care. With eeti=er re-
ceived hy us for six boxes. isee0111 vrttb
fire dollars. we u reed the purchaser ear
written guarantee to refund the meow If the
treatment dom. not effect a core. Oseirentee
issued only by James miasma, Noe author
ixed agent for Goderieb. I Int. JOHN C WEST
at CO_ sole proprietors. Toronto Oat.
$1000 OltriaT
1/111111g ttr.t. ti • ' twist contidence in its roper
foray evil ....t • .ers. mid after thou...satin of
tens of the 1.4 e 1 complicated ono! se% ert-s
cs... •.. ...ugh., cable, sore throne. influent&
e. • ....i - Weeping cough. and all diseases
‘.. and lut gs except asthma. for
iug eetions. temple bottles. xi and fie
eel. :go liortIm *se dollar. tiennine
Int-, - oniv In blue. Sold tqi all dr
GENUINE
I ING-ER
SEWING MACHINE.
CHAS. PRETTY,
Haring been appointed agent of the above
machine. begs tn1 solicit the usual patine pet-
ionage. and will supply ntreoines on liberal
'How'si- that t' braying simies, for what is loud and sense-
tlieg for snap.'
'They'll think you're poor, but lees talking aud swearing any other than
'Catcher them?' braying?' This is an evil that is spread-
', ing and working ita direful effects. It
'livery time.'
'Do you sleep in barns t'
'Why r
'1If one barna yonre biassed for it.'
'Is, you bathe f
'Always -in semmer.'
'in wieder V'
'Ate tramps happy t'
'Tee, ea the woad pea'
'An yes WI imbrostI T
tt
gion that leads to unbelief -the destmy-
gr of all happiness here and hereafter
Thie want et reyevence fir the name of
God, especially in the run. km. di-
rectly to Infidelity. And yet the con-
versation heard almoat constantly among
the workmen rit all our retitle works, at
the earners of the street andasiolacem of
latusging, is disgustingly low elle.
*Malta Fills purity the Mond, rev -
11111111114, Neer end bowels. ea
18815,
Saginaw and Bay City 3oute.
•
Try the Genuine Binger.
ttcrdence: VIctorin street. neor the M. Z.
Church. tioderieb.
A wee* pude at biome by tbs
diistrione. Hest business seer
fore the public. Capita. 02711„
.d. We will wart yea.
men. buyouts.' girl wagged
w ere to emelt SKIM Now 'atheist's*.
can work lab=mthlk•fr
pay you nearly so swell. ellt •rm
time to tbe
slaw
make enormous pay, by a
teat. easily. and h000rably. A T10111 4
Co.. Augusto. matee
Bill III
BLOOD
Cures Dizziness, Loss of Appetite, Indigestion, DirunilM010.
Dyspepsia, Jaundice, Affections of the Liver mad JOisipt,
Pimples, Blotches, Boils, 'flown, Salt Blends, &mink,
Erysipelas, and all diseases arising from Impure Blood,
Dr-anlr,1 S,amarh, or irregular action of the Bowels.
FOR
on and after June SM. tate. lease" W
Will leave GODKRICIII. weather toles
MOSS. TRIF* &arias the ems,. se
EVERY THURSDAY
At 1 o'clock p.m.. tor seeteaw. Hey City, Sand
Beech. Tawas. and all poi -alarm the west Awe,
tisrlittlls. Alpena and Chebillygnal.
Returning will (nave GOLICRICII
EVERY SUNDAY
Oil 50 CM.
At I p.m.. for °remit WWI tirelentl. remise
both ways at Part Maros -.701 petals on St.
Clair River.
low prose of
112 FOR THE ROUND TRIP,
es Mord for
formatioet. apply to
IOU. MIL Agent at Oo4torloili.
or C. •. COIANORIZAtl.
ostedeh. May Ma. DM.
110.
CHOLERA INFANTUM
yEanw or,
WORM POWDZE1
/implement 7,, take. Contain Omit' a
Purgative Is safe, ones. NM OW(
41100,07011. .1, Warne in 0141411nra we A.
suns. 1.n V orkiPS
ratke