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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron Signal, 1882-07-14, Page 2• i TM Mw eat FUre. Until arriving at the age of twenty - eve the girl of IteittitMental mend is Shay a quiet, twintereekit>y staidejt, wttL, a stray/ bine ler potty, cue* of the modern Wool, that will sat tt01ts errewe etrne. Sim has an album, and es:Meals autographs; she writes, and has drafted the plot of a thre♦volSme novel, not written; she despises this age of:money. One day she wakes up, and reflects that woman was not made to hre alone. Many of her old school -friends are al- ready wives and mothers; and in the numerous novels from Mudii s which she peruses she notices a tendency to depre- ciate the matrimonial chances of virgins who have reached her time of life. Her poetical instinct warns her that there is 110 romance in old mails. So she rouses for the fray, and puts .on war -paint. A tine figure and car- riage, a well-trained intellect, a strictly conventional manner, a good family con- .nettion, a few art -treasures as heir- looms, eirlooms, a domestic taste underlying her keen poetical sympathy with wives of the Ciuinivere Iattern — all these things Might combine to make her an excellent wife for • roan of easy temper, nut ad- dicted to claim autocratic powers in the home circle But Lovina—as we may call her—is beset by difficulties caused by her pecu- liar temperament, nourished on 'Tenny- son and Browning, and fortified by Swinburne. An ordinary pian will no do for a damsel who feels a deep con- tempt for men who have not, like her- self, set their faces against a mercenary age. Iavinia'shusband mnst be in some twenty respects superior to all other women's husbands. He need nut be rich or noble; she would, on the whole, prefer that he should be neither, so that he might not dwarf her with his superi- ority. But he must have every sort of physical and intellectual advantage, co- operating to make Lira a glorious com- pound o.f mind and matter. He must be handsome and modest, fascinating simple excercise for the understanding and faithful; able to knock down an ox that has no such distracting element 'els- one minute, and tenderly to fasten a fel- ment," observed the Profressor, coolly. len ear -ring to his wife', ear the next. "A blind beggar had a brother. The He roust be peaceful, yet firm; an artist, brother died. What elation were they wants attention. Put the Layla in must orator, sportsman, stateaman. a hero of to one another ? Come tell the that. "Why, they were brothers, exclaim- art water and apply Cloths wet with ice of land, sea, or bavant., yet never bored ed the colonel, with the rapidity of a water or vinegar water, to the forehead by shall talk; a savant, without being a j and over the nose. In aged persons pedant; well-dressed, but net extrava- small boy at the bottom cf his class, who and those who ose great eaters Huse gent—such a man as raver was.' even in hopes to gain promotion. bleed shows a tendency to apoplexy. books, and' alas, never can be ' • 'Si, sir," answered the Professor, re - The bowels 'mould be kept free and the But Lavinia believes in his existence, g 8 diet .regular. • in her power to find him, •in her ability sigiificent tyre of some low order of in- to discover merit which was before hid- telligence, "they were not brothers, _ _ ot I. should scarcer have asked thei1ues CANADIAN NEWS. den. So she draws out, examined, and i y criticises all her wale friends. Of fe- tion, — male friends she has one, and into her 'They might be brothers •ire -law,' sa:g Mr. J. Higginbottom, for some tune auditor, and lately Grand Trunk agent ears she pours her plaint. .The _poet is Bested Funnidog. at Sarnia, has been appointed General sickly, and dragoon fast, the 'divine "Undoubtedly they might,", replied ! Freight Agent at Detroit. slow, the merchant ignoble, the baronet Puzzleton, with a pitying smile; "but i Mr. G. Blatchford,' of Exeter, has a roue. Not one may marry her; and at they were nut." purchased from Mr. P. McPhillips 100 last, b dint of disenchantment, she i "Sto a bit.. said McPherson, bur- I acres of land, being lot 2, con. 1, Us - y' p borne, for *600 cash. grows sour, except to her canary. and , riedly une who has ;4.1 his answer quite doesn't wish to be antics- Mr. John Meyer, second son of Mr. hates men almost as much as she detests read,but y yetL Meyer, Harpurhev, has procurrd a married women. But • she sketches rated. "The blind beggar. you said, a good appointment in the Iturnigration miniatures with the pen and pencil of had a brother and the brother died. ' Department in Winnipeg. the moan she could have loved, and these Well of course. if one was dead. -.al MrWin. F. soler of Seaforth returned much resemble the wax presentments in knew they could rot • be brothers any from Dakota on Monday. He sold part barbers' widows,of his property at Jamestown for $15,- lon ger. 500,thereby clearing un this une trans - The Sentimental F.irt, after a period The idea is novel, ' observed the Pro- action over $10,030. of literature, misanthropic retirement, often takes • feasor, gravely, "but you have not bit' The wife of Mr. Rebert'McDonald, of to literature, and dints with authors. upon tLe exact s"lutit 1. Thr fact is. the Boundary Line, Howick and Grey, She submits a copy of Ler verses to the gentlemen and ladies, a Hind beggar was found deaddn bed on the morning Laureate, and, getting a polite rep}v, of Tuesday the 24th of June. She had emboldened to try a work in prose. may be either male or female. In this leen a-'ffering from heart disease fur instance she was a female. ':hey were s„hie time. While the book is going through the l . • ••I coil that a cat�jl,said Aloes ution of the License Fund in the East President. 11 v: ”. ll" M. Nr7lA •Two impressi t tome .Hail to m tiers., invoked at the duetr, obeening, "I have niwe here who isill." "Thank Lassen," observed the other, "I have no niece," and he walked away How bow could that bel" "Why, it's a riddle! ' exclaimed Mr. Funnido*, delightedly. "And one that you will net gut. in a hurry simple se it is," obeeived the as the I'releesor, the busters. clown 'the Artist, at a certain SIGN A ,, a RIDAYI JULY i4. 1882. , It is na4ineajaaary be Mote M ps- 1k t' ,dale BBL40 togid e tad bilk of eatiostast Swine land- ** *es widveith ooalideate• thabsiRea sin bomb• *worm, wrote.---" , d totes, his4pst the boob sm4 twenty-four akil- YHuwewife, and the ladies bit their pens, but declined to oetuwit them- selves. ' They had never been taught," they said, "the Rule of Tkree.'' "Yea are all wrong," sail the Pro- fessor, quietly, "as I expected you would t e. The way to get at the matter is to consider what is gained. The landlord and his whole story of changing the sover- eign may be taken out of the question, since he is neither betto.r nor worse foe the transaction. The buyer of the boob gets in exchange for his bad sovereign four shillings sad a pair of boots, and that is just what the cobbler loess." "If one only had a roost to one's self, and the whole day before one to do it in," sighed Mrs. Housewife; "I think I could answer any of these question."— [The Household. Professor et nftdently. "Come, ladies and gentlemen. solve the problem. "1 ace--- " ejaculated Mn. House- wife. "Hush ! whisper in my ear," cried Pnarleton, with all the excitement of a child with a top. "Don't let'em hear it. "Niece by marriage." Stuff and non- sense. The thing is not any fooliah kind catch at all:" and once more he glanced with hostility at Funnidog, at much as to say, ''Such as he would ask you." Nothing can be simpler than my ques tion. "I've got a niece, that's ill," says one brother. "Thank heaven, I have not got a niece,"says the other. "How can that be 1 You all give it up l Well the invalid was his daughter. "Oh 1 see," said Mrs Housewife des- pondingly. "Ijow very stupid in us not to find it out." "Yes, indeed, ma'am,•" answered the remorseless savant. "That failure only showa how difficult it is for ordinary minds to grasp more than one idea at the same time. The attention is solely fixed on the different varieties of nieces." "And, also," observed Mr. Aloes who deep that the skin has peeled off, dredge was much displeased at being classed the dry soda directly on the part affect - among "ordinary minds") and also, the ed. attention is naturally distracted fromthe For a slight cut there is nothing bet - point at issue by the brutality of the ter to control the hemorrhrage than coin - father's remaik. Now that is in itse:f 'a, mon unglazed brown wrapping paper, catch' in my opinion; such as is used by marketmen and gro- c Well, sir, I will give you another cers, a piece to be bound over the wound. Note bleed, if not in excess, should not be checked. It is nature's method of relieving congestion. It sometimes, however, passes a healthy limit and . *atl'e Cure is takes Spee the blew d t h. - al the system. '' Prime agile. !'ar mbodi b (:.,run Myna. soil, for Uudesida• 9st i�sitt tlwotll UL JI1Y l �r�els are vert liable Tu. prepitille a �,mre6 and tr the igetinet iter b7 tt *u me the Digest!** are inv►geraW4 the Bowels kept regular and the Blood ren- dered pure and cool. Sold in large bot- tles at 60 cents by all druggist)). Geo Rttynas, agent, (ludericb. ansate lessedies For sllaer Aeelate&Is. There would be little if any sickness during the hot months of July and Au- gust, if every one would take Dr. Car- son's Sto.tarch and Constipation Bitters, as they prevent and cure all derange- ments of the Stomach and Bowels. Sold in large bottles at 50 cat is by all drug gists. Geo. Rhynes, agent, Goderich. The most delicate, small, and least showy ruches are sewed in the neck and sleeves of French dresses.. These are of lace and muslin more often than of the fragile crepe Base furn.erly. used, and are usually ciimposed of three rows very flatly pleated. There are minot accidents liable to oc- cur at any time, which. if properly treat- ed, may prevent serious results. A burn or scald is always painful; but the pain can be instantly relieved by the use of carbonate of soda, or common baking soda (saleratue). Put two teaspoonful of soda in half a cup of water. Wet a piece of linen cloth in the solution and lay it on the burn. The pain will dis- appear as if by magic. If the burn is so BOOTS A D SHOES arsr• ttha,OIOl►t!stablis`1ed fhhoe in Town, In Efridtess �7• LIT. aesoser�s�, Neuralgia, Sciatica, Lumbago, Backache, Soreness of the Chest, bout, Quinsy, Son Throat, Swell- ings and Sprains, Burns and Soa/ds, General Bodily Pains, Tooth, Ear and Headache, Frosted Feet and Ears, and all other Pains and Aches. Po Preparation on earth equate 9r. JArnr Olt as tate, sears, �et and clap Utern.l aesedy. A trial entelle bad a rom use toner Wilily' outlay of 40 Data. Inc with paha oa have cheap sad positive poo./ of It. ancien Directions In nevem t.sg.aps. BOLD BY ALL DIUGOIBT8 AID DEALERS II IEDIOIIB. A. VOGELEB A CO., Baltlw.ore, Md., U- d. t. tc VI tie nice i oefidic us a•ad the most economic buyer Y SPRING STOCK Is now eumple.e, and f take pleasure have Iliad forming h auy usto,ners that at no pre- vious & Varied Stock Large As at it is positive facI have t that no sised the uch hvalue in dsrd of footlwear can be goand t elsewhere. unti GUSTO I W ORS made prompt and careful attention, and will up of every grade still receives my p p in the [Haat approved styles by firm -class workmen, end of the very twat material obtainable. Lathes a�� Misse� Bools Heel plaled Frcc of charge, Banking. BANK 1). OF MONTREAL. CAPITA L. SURPLUS, *12,000,000. *5,000.0(0, At time of purchase if so desired. E_ DO -W NZ NG Crabb's Block, Cor. East Street and the Square. Goderich Branch. (:L -A,'.4 FLuurler. Allows interest on deposits. Drafts. letter of credit and circular notes issued, payabl in all parts of the world. 1 CANADIAN BANK OF COMMERCE Paid rip Capitol; - 86,000,000. 81,#00,(100. Reef, - press she has an exciting time correct- blether an• slater. The following figures show the distrib- -- — ing proofs: but dis.allusins await hes. when the critics hill to [:outing her "Well, at all etut,te, it was an easy heroes and herciues with ridicule. Her I hone, and eau all Missed it.' retuincd the •1 as t•� Riding of Huron: McKillop, *89.08 ; General Manager, if-..�.......r-nay Hullett, ?.14.82; Morris. $54,R2; Gre) 1$191.87 ; Brussels, $454.4.i ; Turnberry Goderich Branch. $58,29 ; Wroxeter, 5.82.23 ; Howick, A. M. ROSS, - - - - M.(NM:ER. second attempt is no. so orae ty first. She aims determinedly :d success ,l r,fessor, with quiet triumph. " iuw, i24G•t►8 ; Provincial Treasury, gt71.(�• the�tprineip.sl erest To on amts +rtiesl/inri entni.ta by a story of eunju_al im1.r• priety,wlticlo I will give you one more example of sit- On Monday while Miss Margaret, ditto Great liruain and the (-nited States. bough vial arithmetic, which will t .. h f -- 1 north f d and sold strikes one of the oust sensitive chords } f f t al reac'c1s of sl a ��ut oaf the stable and knocked her down. __ ___ novels; and though this second Look gets in subtraction, and all I shall ask of you She remained unconscious for two hours, a lavish share of abuse, it elevates its is—since two dr three guesses would ar- •ami though nut recovered yet .Dr. authoress r.. a didtiout posits ul iu chi.. rive at the truth by mere elimination— I Itrownlee thinks she is out of all danger. r r, ut ars. 1, g Then she begins literary and ,pieced- Hiatt went into a cobbler's and bought a 1Muoretown committed suicide on Satur- } t f nuctecn ehlllmgs. He day nls-ht by lumping inti Lake St. �1. .e 111 al l -e- 1{ ter c' r. as. ,.troll •, nor i e sur- l Adcanrestu Farmers on Xntelil with one o i - f mom endorsers, witho?t motrlit gee '753 in the rreasts a ani a oe•td lona fide. It is a cimtle question vie, was milking, nuc o the horses ran t •write down the reply •u1 paper. A A m;n, named Stanle • belon ing t wo ld f 1 t ary flirtatious witl[ publishers, editors of 'pair of ono ■ ..r III twenty shillings , Clair from the stenmcr Omar D. Conger. magazines, brother authors, and foreign put down it translators. She drfeuus the moral and the colllerjllavulg no change sent scope of her works in ]otters to the re- t.'a neighb .ring public house, and gave own, it to him. Later in the day, the land - views and develops a thesis .1 her o as to a recondite meaning «f the Seventh I lord of the inn sent, in to say that the C• mmaudluent, The mocks at British sovereign was a load one, and insisted: prudery, and says to herself that genius ul.d.n the cobbler making it right; which was ever venturesome. She puts a bust he aeeordtngly dole loss, how much of livrom in her tIuoly. Surpnae is I1 1 the cobbler lose by the whole trans- created nmong the public when it l e- • action 1 There is no play upon words, signed the nomination payer for the ri- comes known that the authoress of so or anythinz 'nit a c' humors sum in aritie val candidate on the day when his (laugh- much latest des atches.from London in - widow, nor a lady lining on a pension l "Why., its the esaieet thin, in the ,lic,tte that the British Government has earned by lung service in the "half- world,.. ejaculated H�'usea•ife. " of at last determined upon decisive action course the cobbler last jest in Egy r, and if the g.,esip of the lobby w.irld," but a lady of good connections, ' of the Honer o.f Commons :inn be rodded still young, and strictly tuitions, strict- -Be quiet,'' cried Puu-.leton very act- ,n the British atuactrou lw'mbard ly virtuous women '1 a aentirncutal ( grilc-, "Write it down, will v.,u, if y•tt i Alexandria undone the construction re SALMON AND LOBSTER. turn often astonish the worl1 by the i can write. w , Egyptian forts is discontinued. to be There depth and range of their knowledge. — I -Scratch a professor, and you tind a I ingII"Yet the intervention e••f Torkisk troopserence regard (t;rencule Murray. Tartar," whtuperel Aloe*. " Ton had'A FINE ASSORTMENT T E,(yx•.:an torts is dia;•,ntinuetl. Thele hotter du as Le wishes." seems yet to lie some diferenc'i regard „F. So we all wrote clown what we nnattin- ing the intrrrention of Tnrkieh trsi a ed t'. be the loss wh ich the cobbler had in Eevi'to and the kn••wlydge of this. Christie Brown • cenpled with the fact that matters had • Although several persons witnessed the act, it was done se coolly and ituickly that n'ne interfered to prevent it. Mrs. McMaster, wife of the new mem- ber for Glengarry, has been dangerously ill from it 'lunation t f the 1unste, but it is hoped to . she is now out of danger. The bitterness of the content in the con- test in this cenntyq may}be judged from the fact that Mrs. McMaater's father "epics" is r:d.t an experienced i noetic• ter lay at the point of death. ARRIAS. CANN F D CORN BEEF, LUNCH TONGUE, ENGLISH BRAWN POTTED TONGUE, BEEF, THE VARIETY STORE 1 have just received a large stork of WALL PAPER, t3•REET WINDOW BLIND pAPF R, CAR- PET FELT, ETC_, FITC_ I have also on band • large stock of all kinds of T BRACKETS, EXPRESS�� WAGONALL S, CROQUETi SETTS.HORSES, All kinds of repairs done to Lounges, Sofas. and ('hairs. C recaned and perforatedseats put at.CarpetTt and oilcloth laid, pictuG. C. ROF ER-'I''tSO y stem�, HARDWARE ow- V • - r4r- -� ;��'�s ow-lJ rw- r4,1" 1E1 "� ss. ,.alnf Ar r.4r- J M .4. -ta►� TO BUY YOUR Farmers' Hardware rH1CKEQ FRESII lid 1; Builders' Hardware HNIVBS FORKS ANS SPOONS, everythin_ veu want in his line IE IS BOUND TO SELL CHEAP saver s .,clout. is rather an indel+nate trim. As coat - only understood it ernsatf of a torpid sluggish state of the liver, at dr eficienn cy or a superabundance of bile, alter- ation from its proper character. All dis- turbed inturhed action of the liver and biliary organs giving rise to•in tb.eide, or ander o•e f' ahnuL1• r Lidice,' het ne weerineea, dixsinsie, nicest otnNt••as of appetite, bad bowels, * ' ,are prompt- ly cured I.v Burch ck RIM ti Bitters. 2 Goin --is excellent for filling decayed Teeth: hot "Tr 4RRRRR" prevents the decay, makes them white, and make peo- ple lovable R sent sample. sustained; and it was wonderful how ,antsy. a t a ptent where further delay, BIBCUITB min opihions differed within such narrow may prove disestn,ns to Witte!) prestige limits. the Feast. has rrolel.ly bed the Gov- CAKES, The colonel malhim lose two pounds. eminent to sonee at this conclusion. TEAS. In cane of hostilities t.reakint ••rat, ntren- Mr. Aloes made him loci. jnat a pound n,.us e!f„ria «111 1M toad, by the British anal the hoots. troops to protect the linos Cansi from Mr. Funnidog made him 1'se six and injury by fanatical natives. end for thin rty shillings 'ferric, the native troopo whit+: await thi Mr. McPherson made him los. sixteen thought, admirably adapted and better{embarkation in British India are, etter t it shillings and the Lents. minae the profit shle to endure the atrem* heat o1 the h. mad. nt.nn eh. hoots (which. said the climate SUGARS AN Pure pioes. TRY? THEM Chas. A. Nairn. This Spring and Summer. • See his FENCE WIRE, the best yet. R_ W_ McK=NZ= REAT BARGATNS! IN BOOTS AND SHOES! GREAT CLEARING SALE FOR 30 DAYS I'resione to stock taking at AT CAMMEll'S BOOT RISME EINRIN Parties wanting ,heap goods should rat at once lia, •ne •^cotori first class nor 11 am prepared to manufareare • Nothing but First Class Material Used, A Ccod Fit Guaranteed WM CAMPBELL. G'sleri It. Fehy. 1011 lel. GET YOUR PRINTING OF 1L TKRT DESCRIPTION, Posters, Circulars, Cards. &c. t•RiNTRP AT THE (IFFICEOT TAF HERON MONAD. North Ntreet fladevi eh