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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron Signal, 1882-04-21, Page 7„,.•,rant3r4,7,-r. .,•tin THE HURON SIGNAL, 1t1iI DA . APRIL .1, 1882. 7 Fun anb Tanal. It is a difficult thing for • dog without a tail to show his muster how mush 1,e thinks of hint. Chickens ase a peculiar fruit. They should be pulled only in the dark of the moon and atter sunset Huggins never uses an umbrella. the rain rainy untinp he cuts «elfish fur breakm fast and says he a then sure of be wg dry all day. When you sin a banana peel resting un the sidewalk, and s fat utast uucuu- soious1y approaching, the indiatlous point te an early (all. At a ehurulr festival, it is the girl with the large a`.p.ttte who gets eiuIK wall. In fact, ate takes the t....e -and the young wan peva fur it. A clove is only the bud e( a Bower. One might suppose it were a rose -bud, so much is iia fragrance retied uu by men who gut out betwwu the acts. Her gentle hint: Young lady (*widow. lystarting)--"My goodness :" Ywog gentleman (late star) er) - "W hat's the matter 1” Young lady (glanoiltg at the shook)-"Nuthing; I thought I heard the milk man. " A Connecticut pastor declined an ad- dition of $100 to his salary, for the rea- son, among others, that the hardest part of his labors heretofore had been the collection of his salary, and it wouid kill him to try to collect 100 men. "The aeayest ratan I ever met," says Josh Billiugs, "u a henpecked husband when he is away from home. Nature seldom make a phool; shesimpl furnish- es the raw tnatetials and lets the fellow finish the job to suit howbeit." The following letter was recetv.d by an undertaker from an afflicted widow- er. -"My waif is did, and wants to be b.ried to -morrow at Wolter klock, U now weir to dig Mols-by the side of my other two waifs -Ise it be dup." "Bridget,." said the mistress to her servant, "put a little nutmeg in the cus- tard this afteraooa." And Bridget picked out the smallest Nutmeg she could Bad and threw it in the custard, where it was feud entire at the eveiiiug • A woman at Manette, Ohio, oa read - •,1' somebody having committed suicide by means of a towel, remarked that .1 a did not understand hew it (s•• •. , u doom; but an hour afterward lava was found choked to death in exact- ly the semi manner. Si. what a woman will de when you rolee bier cur- ioeity. Mir air sadass. The best way to tell a real ustrich plume from a ewnterteit u to prim it. At spring dinners crisp lettuce and strawberries will be served with the fiaht The physicians have come out strongly against the dotted veils now worn again. Qwon Victoria remains faithful to Butt ideal material of elderly ladies, black silk. Many people are much distressed be- cause authority says diamonds are very common. The o.iy was of paring the 'mile and shaving the head of rumor, is for lovely women never te repeat one word she hears. A neted\New York artist rnvolves from the depths of his artiste o.naciuus- nem that a large peke bonnet and an aq- uiline nose are made fur each other. A fashionable hair dresser of London announces a new sesthetio color for the hair, supplied by a glittering red bronze powder, which imparts the fashionable golden red or Titian red shade. It is asserted over and over. that anx- iety shortens life, but when a chap sees another fellow feeding his girl sandwiches at a picnic is he going to sit down and sit down and bid his soul be calm' Not by a boot -jack! A Mary4md man vho wanted to do something in memory of his wife has er- ected a church spin and put. four big tells in it. The people in that locality will keep that woman's memory green for years to come. A great number of bridesmaids is now considered vulgar, and the aristocratic bride has not above tour if she be an English girl, though twelve maidens were not unseal at a fashionable wedding a few years ago. During the pwt year reveral different women who have been dumb for years have suddenly regained their speech. When a man gets that way its good-bye to gab forever. An earthquake can't bring a yell. The Principes of Wales is described u being very slight and tall, with nose, cheek and chin u delicately molded u 1 done by a sculptor's hand in marble. There is no color in her face and she is very spirituelle. And though she is 37, she looks not over 24 The ailleaced bride of Prince Leopold is down en thio Court Chronicle records as Helen, although her correct name is Helens, but as her Majesty's classical ear rebels against the Greek pronounciation of the word Hel-era, she has changed it to Bolen to avoid further discussion. The Queen of Holland will give her sister, the Princess Hole., for a mar - nage present a splendid sleigh in the form of a swan, and painted in the style of Watteau. It is lined with with quilt- ed bine sattn. On an average, the hin- nies will find enough snow for the sleigh shoot ones is five years in England. Then is w muck extravagance in wed- dings nowadays that all except the wealthiest men be *tarried privately. Ever the posted maple think army ase - not here a wedding without flowers music and a dinner or supper, which torts enough to set them up in house- keeping if the money wore expended for that parpot. The new treatase.t for rapidly condi- tioningReuses, Zoed's Tome O.mpotnd and Bend Mixture. Each kagr own - Mina a gad ArgjmR Bag which is give to the animal using bas •tr'ose tante powAsr. "Ids is the Mss mon seers treatoIatsail will aeeeingilh more i, me weak thea the old system of RprI.rude hos, Fds aad Conditionsr, a Powde woa3 do is a Month. ask year ��� shoot it Goo Rhy... ag..1. itwde- Dee.1s ea beg. Bees that have been wintered in cellars should be allowed W remain there, if they will do so quietly, until late in Ap- ril, obeeping tie, cold for thea to the 1, fieldswhen i.- turn, .•.d so satinet entirely avoid "spring dwindling;." Nu doubt tnauy bees ail' eves out and drop unto the cellar bottom as spring advances. But there is nu ones. to hurry there out so lung as they do not have su offensive odor caused by soiling their combs of or hit r. If 11 lit found necessary to take them out to fly, du w om a waruo, suuu) fav, and after they Irate fl„was, take thea, back t.. ILe cellar tv remain until they are put iii their suluturr stand The cellar rt.u►t Ise .alai t perfett!y dark until the bees are bit., .y shut out. Let epilog my Iwcs were taken from the c,:. i .uou the Y7t6 day of April after a con.tiiuo•,i cuubn0trlent of five months a nl t wruty days. They were in excel- lent couiitiur and bees front nearly ev- ery stock went to the fields mid reunited loaded with puller within an hour aper the hives sen set up in their summer stands. As sown as the bees erre taken trust the cellar, the bottom boards of their hives should be cleaned and of dead Nn and smoothly scraped and all ve.tilaiicn thoroughly closed with pieces ut thin (ward and luting except the entrees, at the bottom of the hire, which, if bas s l any r of ordinary strength Udell lits left open as in sumsser. Bees that harm been wintarwd at fluor eaesmer stasis will need for same ears army pompe' m tb. seas,,, at the lint ap$/wet► sof warm • Riser. An Ohio szchaega Mean this eanmpls of the kind of a man who thiaks mac of his tobacco than he does .4 bus wife. Where w the boy that will Brow up as disgustingly selfish Only • short tinss ago, while we eat in as Osceola .tors, we sew a tarn and his wife from the coaatry trading; The wo- man had the appomrsnee of being 1 hard- working, indtrtnotr, intelligent lady. Bho we; examining a piece of calico or akar cheap dress -goods. The clerk said, "Shall I cut off ten yards?" The pale-faoed, overworked woman turned to her husband, and is a timid, frightened manner asked him if she might buy a dress she needed it, and the cost would be len than s dollar. ':No," he grunted, "I can't afford it;" and yet he had just paid as much fur a great plug of navy and a paper or two of smoking tobaccos). The poor, illy clad, but neat woman subsided as though this was no new ex- perience, while her rough, coarse, and animal husband bit off a mouthful of the weed, and ordered her to get ready for home. Row so Spoil a Ra sb .d. Snarl at him. Henpeck him. Find fault with him. Keep an untidy house. Quarrel with him for trifles. Humor him half to death. floes him out of his boots. Always have the last word. Be extra cress on wash day. Never have meals ready in time. Run bills without his knowledge. Let him sew buttons on he shirts Pay no attention to household pens*. es - An Earl died in London the other day at the age of twenty-su who had drunk life's cup of sin and shame te the very leas. Heir to a great name, possessor of a princely income, married to one of the most beautiful women in England, all was not sufficient to keep him from the reckless course of dissipation which even- tually killed him, and his memory was only saved from the still further iufamy of dying in the house of an actress of questionable character by his friends conveying him to his own mansion when on the verge of death. We refer to the death of this unfortunate nobleman, however, not se much for the purpoes of pointing out his sins as to show the ini- quities of the church patronage system. This young man had no less than thirty- nine "livings" is his gift -"thirty-nine parishes." remarks a contemporary, "de- pendent for the selection of their spirit- ual guides on the choice of a mere youth, who had corns in po.amsion of the right in the Name wayhis mansions and parks, horses anse settle, descended to him." The sooner the Church of Eng- land finds some way of riding herself of the incubus of such patrons" the bet- ter it will be both for her own position and the progress of the work which she has at heart. -(Witness. InnopeasMe is • wonderful thing, yet w natural. sn rokdosable. Why 1 If yos have feel- ings of gormless; too weak and dragging to ray; too aQrars to sloop; aa appe- tit. hardly salient to kesp holy and soul together: beanie, with pais Wren the bask; ths whale system relax- ed; perhaps coughs sold sore lungs, and will see one to in bottles at Dr. G. L Austin • Pliosphatine as the mat asap dammed, it will net fail to make you as wlkusi.stie freed. Why do ws eaF that 1 Bemuse PhosphaLne supplies a want, 1A w>ry ropes tr the tipsters u lack - .n0 surf ,..'incl for. It is not • seal - ciao, Inst atdolikIRat flllie""ly eoeveried Inas bbond, hews and titans lh L sacro dslitives to the tees Try it The re- sult is w commis as that nam and ant oe hind in bend. All draegitta Len- ora it Co . Nolo ageing for tae DOsei- niOs. fib Frost fit. Tomato (berseal. Tu i'('1 .t(If..i( 11, [BE ChareueI, laid flat while cold en a burn causes the pain W abate iututediate- ly; by leaving it on fee an guar the bunt seems almost healed wheel the -heat is superficial. Th. charcoal is a value for many other purpu.ea Tainted ,neat, surrounded with it, is sweeteued; strewn ever heaps of decomposing pelta, ur ever dead aniwais. it preveuts any unpleas- ant d .air. Foul water is purified by it. It is r great disiufeotant, and aweetelia offensive air if placed in shallow trays around apartments It is w very por- ous in it. "minute interior spaces," it absorbs and ooucleuses gases most rapid- ly Ono cubic inch of fresh charcoal will absorb nearly one hundred inches of gaseous moonlit. Charcoal forms an unrivalled pueltice for malignant wounds, and sures, often corroding away the dead dash reducing it one quarter in as hours. In oases of what we call proud flesh it u invaluable. 1 have seen nmor- tifiation arrested by it. It gives no disagreeable odor, arrodos no metal, hurts no texture, injures no color, is a simple and safe sweetener and disinfec- tant A teaspoonful of charcoal, in halt a glass of water, often relieves a Bead- I ache; rt atessim the gases and relieves the &in..ded Itlremarh, try pressing anaiest the serves. which . t t,.ud from the stomach of the head Char void almoras a b .orad tram its weight of gee nor wind is • stt.t.meh or t.,wsis, and n tame way it wins the Med►. It often 'abuse. eines• `sae pen, or Imam berg The Iii. wore re eah....d gime ty ee im =ammo Ir >�d sea. f, ___lies threw pa.& of alio front . eheai It sawn tam two mei sat up a slobs (lm wash` sails plrwbnahl v be • immi.r llstery it Naty d. Re ham meal • f the moo r ured up m balms that ensu sew beta .itfht• rest, tas..wiqr~ pet se the -p-.or of a Wiliii tie. jury. vitamin .ad lawyers lint a 1st of eattabbe time, and the mo- wer wee .sus t, rtl by twenty -freer hoem 1w Ne reiase,ss of a t oo- seeens . These seems to be no doubt that the primmer 'book the mks. - lt is said that me thou dutrew(' Irish ladies wb.• had rocoired no ret.t for 1.o years. end 'alio was living in Kiegston in the dampest poverty, ova visited one day by use of her fanner.' wives, who called tin her professedly to bring her a basket of eg>a► Great was dm surprise of the distremsd proprietor en opening one of the eggs laid at the l bottom of the basket to find that it con- itained a roll of bank notes. It transpires that $428 of public money was raid for printing and 0:prais- ing certain Tory members' speeches on the railway contract last year. - 5. The courts have decided. that refus- ing to take a newspaper and periodicals from the post -Aloe, or removing and leaving them uncalled for, is prima facia evidence of intentional fraud. If you waat to get rich mount a mule, because when you are on a mule you are better of GIRLS FOR Tse WttsT. - Last week Mrs. Davidson, wife of the late proprie- tor of the Commercial hotel, Seeforth, took with her to Emerson, nix girls from this neighborhood, who are to assist in connection with the hotel they intend running. The girls are guaranteed $1O a month fon two months, and passage paid, at the end of which time they will be paid current wages there, with the option of leaving to do better, if they can. A lie.eral aaaaeprde. Never was there such a rush for Drug Stores as ix now at ours for a Trial B. t - tle of Dr. King's News Discovery for Consumption, Coughs and Colds. All persons afflicted with Asthma, Bronchi- tis, Hoarseness, Severe Coughs, or any affection of the Throat and Lungs, can get a trial bottle of this great remedy free, bin calling at your drug store. Free er h•4 All persons wishing to test the merits of a great remedy -one that will positively cure Consumption, Coughs, Colds, Asthma, Bronchitis, or any affection of the Throat and' Lungs -are requested to call at your drug stare and get a trial bottle of Dr. King's New Discovery for Consumption, free of east, which will show you what a regular dollar -size bottle will do. wemas's tree meed. A friend in need is a friend indeed. This none an deny, especially when aa• sistanee is rendered whenonersorely af- flicted with dismiss, more particularly those oomplainta and weaknesses so common to our female population. Every woman should know that Electric Bitten are woman's true friend, and will poaitively restore her to health, ectal when all other remedies fail, A tingle trial al- ways proves our assertion. They ars plee.mnt te the taste and only (soot fifty wets a beetle. Sold by all druggista. WIL SON'S PRiL$-RIPTI()N DRUG STORE. aZEDS I = DS Fresh seeds to lass .01 pee/ agse Complete Stock The address -label on the first page will show each subscriber the stale of his s....Ullt r itlt Talk D1t:'AL, .,11.1 (it way Ise blula.t) that t.ti. u au up I,roprit.tr.w.a.0 1"r .n.,.uIr au al tercet i•'., w t14r There ate .alar t.turee iu o•tr b..oka, else, wt,uti'night rely appropriate be :•djuate.. before t lir end of this "1 tae no ..,au sic, Ili Mg," bas born r IM 1)' arlp it.e,t 1.1. J• all, red dila iu- ).inctte4i i. , t, upwn 6.1111r119,0 da. b.i.i,rrs. • 111•vn siwper cert. A e..td to the wise is srfirient, ami ■e r ill a. t' 1t.. Inure at l'rruelll, 181 66 detest dunning. ...roan t • .b flute 1.r v.- le • .. ie dine( t.• a r..Men mt.., isuu. tl. ,• ,u 110.r bray. 01411111it .,1 r;te•u,� dr 11 .. 0.4 iuu;L k,wause his all•alite uvuwu,ls r . Ion I.•t ti.e artificial b e..tancy it 'evil te.- liar after effects ut ., hush kit. 1. las iuot0 111144'181.10 than Ied..le: It is Ni.e du•wliul pntrlise that is favi sendn,lc .hetuaruls to their graver. A tumedt for all this i8 found las the truce friend of temppeeras e, -the beet and purest of 811 ni.sines,- Eitel vic Bit- ten. tote by '.eo. B.hynas at 50 cents. tedfeati Arises Salve. Tim best Halve in the world for Cub, Brumes, Ulcera, Salt Rheum, Fever Sure., Tetter, Chapped Bands, Chil- U. us, coons, and all Skin Eruptions, and p.mitisely cures Piles. It is guatan- (4.ei to Kite perfect satisfaction, or w." ry refundeol Price 25 cents per box. For wile by (leo. Rhynes. 1830 ly. Cathartic . Pills Oema`e the choicest cathartic principles ismsdiems, in proportions accurately ad- justed to secure activinr, certainty, and uaIlormft� of effect. They are the result eaf yesn of a reful 'tidy and practical ex- periment, and are the most effectual rem- edy yet discovered for diseases caused by derangement of the stomach, liver, and bowels. which require prompt and .1.e - teal treatment. Arses Poeta are spe- cially applicable to this clam of diseases. They act directly on the digestive and aastatilative processes, and rretore rego- i.r hsaith as action.intheireir Thextensive .by s. b G os, end all nations, c o , is one of the many proofs of their value as a safe, sure, sad perfectly reliable purgative medicine. ling compounded of the concentrated virtues of purely vegetable substances, they are positively free from calomel or any injurious properties, and can be admiwtered to children with perfect safety. Ara's PILLS are an effectual cure for Constipation or Costiveness, ladl- e, Dyspepsia, of Appetite,d.ewloStomach Breath, Maid. Rem, Headaoha_of �.Nmbness, B ss, Ja Rheumatism. Eruptions and Min trues Ooi a, GlTensors.es, fib•`~ Dyss.t.ry, emit, Pt1:e° DVorrd•ramof the Liver, and all other dfsesaes result ing from • disordered state of the diva - Rye apparatus. As a Dinner Pill they have no equal. While gentle in their action, these PILL. are the most thorough and search- ing cathartic that an be employed, and never give pain unless the bowels are in- flamed, and then their influence is heal- ing. They stimulate the appetite sod digestive organs; they operate to purify mad enrich the blood, and impart te. sewed health and vigor to the whole system. PREPARED BY DR. 1. C. AYER & CO., Predigest sad A.abttsl Chenteta. Lowell, Mas. SOLD BY ., . Dapeeie , .y.arw>Qta. • Dummies. Cossrwere sad Aam.wrs Itmovaan's •ew:me Om is ededera ewer r.ti.v, eider I. w hems TAW 111712111A111 191 CRAMPS, 1001767,111. /Obi TM7O4T AiYW, COLDS, apt ARtia 1.11151111ALLT IRs 77V1LLA1d. CLLLObII LUMPS 1177317 J01171, 71eOIT Aldi cu117a iilnrlao4 rt PAr71'7 fad t=, rer7 de are* e0, I•twv 100816=0041 IO give .ui+.. 11"11111111811118114"8.111111 f4' WiTLIL ORM ea ILMILIIIITJOI lb 00., Propaistin TC1111011T% CET. CHEAP GROCERIES 1 DEAN SWIFT Begs to announce to the people of Goderich and this section of Huron, that he has purchased from Mr. A. Phillihu stook of Groceries, eta, and will continue the busin in the old stand, un the Corner of Maoris and, Bruce !treats. Hstiug Delight the goods for ash, and as I intend to make all my purchases from wholesale men for caah also, I will be in a position to sell at Very Low Prices for Cub. My stock will always be fresh. I will keep the beet brands of teas, good sugars, and everything in the grooery line from the best producers. Bacon, Spiced Mists, etc.,alwt ys on hand in season. 1 am determined to please, both in qualttyand price. Cafl at the stand, Victoria street, oppoaite the Fair Ground, near D. K. 8trachan's hop. Uederiich, March 9th, 1882. D_ AT S V Y THE OLD STAND. D. C. STRBCHI .N tl•s aa.Ot CD Ile OrFLOCILT.`Z" BvsirTEss To the uld staid in the Albion Blocs. formerly oc'sptrd by Lin, wben Its will be please to wcltwme all Ms olid customers sad the pelt& ocean'. A large Quantity of_` NEW, FRESH GI>;tjCEiRIESI u rHIAP Art THl (HEARZBT D. C. STR.ACHAN Extensive Premiss and SpleadW New Stock. G-_ )3_A_ IR, TR, Y CAJIINET VAIRII aa' EIIIIERTAKER Hamilton on Street, (loderich. rood aasortmeat of k*tchra, teed -,nest Dia .K Rases *see P5.. Offer• epi► as 'fy b; ('hairs (h&Lr. cane and food tratrdt. Cuytr,srda f►4-'e.. da, >Wltaan•e, Wass -Asa Lo Ingr.. Sofas, What -Nets. Forting ^l.s.re. N. 11. A complete sarortatent of Callas sad ahro.da Wirer lave dishes Hear... for hire •t i e.•unable rates. Pig•t ere Framing a specialty.—A call soi.ciu.d. 1711 PLAIN AND FANCY PRINTING EXECUTED WITH NEATNESS AND °DESPATCH, AND AT LOW RATES AT "THE SIGNAL OFFICE." NTILE3 es. TOILET SETTS, C011ik Brushes aid of all .Kinds Cheap ax RHYNAS' the Druggist Prescriptions a Speciality - - Night Bell on the Front Door GENUINE BRAGAINS. For the next three months 1 will sell furniture at the following prices, for cash: Low Cupboards at $ a 00 sofas.. .from .....................11 0 utinsres ltedsteads from , 1 75 up. 1 75 up. Fel/ leaf Tablesat - 2 50 Washstands tram 90 cis up. Bureausfrom. ................. :...................,...... 800 u sideboards from 8 50 u p ..,.... Everything else• at similar raft,. 9'h.se prices can't be Beaten In tour. 1 invite mime... ion. 1 nn, boun 1 to sell. as I intend rrmoring to Dakota in the spring. i have alae a lot of,machinery uses in cabinet making whion f will sell at a very low price. COUNTS. All accounts due John .4. Hall en l J. O. Rall must be settled at inc.c TAS (31-. G�AZ12a,, .1t the Market T!E TEN COMIANDLIENT,,, w. have 11 meet esu got es sorrel lag wbIra 01401 ("marl ,n r t ,. as ,.eeaay.a.seel *s.h.. or.e.ela, bet sbg bre eve •tett, 6,111 , ,.Neese Ye saleable meieis. weer please ape tae nrket tee will , sJr.ru. to 5.... . ret dsus. Nin .. .t teget .t ail'.• •". TME TEN COMMANDMENTS lave bees made the set frt et a some wa.ia. t0L Nut 1804. they Aaron e/ trb$4'I • . 1 10.• lo ippleamM. .m•pgM la all the elNart styles v et .ii type, ire 'b. .i / Toe 0..... . e,..,, ., , r lath MMM 1as et new bona the hetet elere aa.1.•ee.•.11. Mg 6 081 ewe *5 esSaw �p�. awe Me nit • eapporecd ler . r. 1., •. •• III , np•alMeaaa.ehb j ssa}v.YM.i taut west Um eh, ld.a.1lsr..,8 ft AI., WIWIt at 'tam. eve d Ib rime, hall nes. are WW1? aYRl.et • r ... a4tat rbe)p•a�a..►a IaM bat a imam tars NMarepoet et ..06 of 14' ••4'..w.,, •r:•. sear ee.s/ltei wr�M�`��li.r.at54. aatbwt b .ay ens guest A t e m M.. 1. n, , , • neo Iwo Il r. erAsr Y Itigd 56,17:80.47001 aw , seg ►en t..t ten Nwe viae a 1..-.r ,..,, ran ++Ml� ai rs ta.a.am et t� 1111114111 on . bst wive st ears es ...a 1 14' ear,.- - -v WHOLESALE PRICE LIST : se 41•14,1 SA ief/rseorMtri9 •s 1 ''rat. SS.t s , w 1Q'lrll<i Q e .—With ery ords, Inc 9S, we mud Ft FE w. set of oar fear peasism Graces, l with every order Incfor S0, a hand - snme ene,.eh,l lltrelwr. With every order for 100, • h ,81.0 tr tffs�as aid V sad w $ teary order Inc 930, we will seed FREE 1 splendid bar/ Odd.Phad Webb Camas MIL LSE & CO., IOSTZZAL, P.Q. LI.HOJt$ .Lh;. rrcm. t Ashlar*. k. The N-illiam Hovey, din B. Heavy d Tip- Siasett, (Ahem, es Mc Potter. sworn Lord fled note r cnn- ,l Mc - r pi/': fur meat mita. for for need I not with, plff; pro - as aril pts• rit for •U9 !ff. or %a- a. or 10 to 11 e MDS.