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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron Signal, 1881-09-30, Page 3THE HURON SIGNAL; FRIDAY, SEPT. 30, 1881. cur*, "I felt it my duty as Rector of the parish, to endeavour to bring yusr friend to a proper 'ens* of her ptritiva." Joan turned toward him. "Has the done it r' she 'ted. The Reversed Remit'fn, his 'ethos - imam concerning the young woman dying out. "I—I--" ke stammered. J interrupted him. itthesee as the has dune her say good J; she demanded. "I dimwit my "I have endeavoured to the best of my ability to improve her mentaleondition," the minister replied. "I thowt as much," said Joan ; I mak' no doubt tha'st done thy best, neyther. Happen tha'et gi'en her what oomfort the had to spare, but if yu'd been wiser than yo' are, yo'd ha' let her alone. I'll warrant there is na a parson 'twixt here an' Lannon, that could na ha' towd her that she's a sinner an' has shame to bear ; bet happen there is na a parson 'twixt here Ari' Lunnun u she could n* ha' towd that much to, hereon. Howivvier, as the has said thy say, happen it'll do yo' fur this toime, an' yo' can let her be for a while." Mr. Barholm was unusually silent dur- ing dinner that evening, and as he sat over his wine, his dissatisfaction rose to the surface, as it invariably did. "I am rather disturbed this evening, Anice," he said. Anioe looked up questioningly. "Why?" she asked. "I went to see Juan Lowrie this morn- ing," he answered hesitatingly, "and I am very much disappointed in her. I scarcely think, after a11, that I would ad- vise you to take her in hand. She is not an amiable young woman. In fact there is • positive touch of the vixen about her." [To BB C,NTINUED. Wider Can Mee /eat P There were two short-sighted men in China, and their names were Ching and Chang. They were always quarrelling as to which of them could see best. One day they heard that there was to be - tablet erected at the gate of a neighbor- ing temple, and they agreed to visit it together and put their visual powers to the test. Each, however, wished to take advan- tage of the other, so Ching went at once to the temple, and looking quits close at the tablet saw,an inscription with the words—"To the great man of the peat and the future." Chang also went, but he advanced still closer, and in addition to the inscription "To the great man of the past and future" read in smaller tat- ters, "Thu tablet is raised by the family of Ling in donor of the great man." On the day which they had agreed on, standing at a distance from which neith- er could read, Ching exclaimed, "The inscription is, 'To the great man of the past and the future.' " "True," said Chang, "but you have left out a part of the inscription which I can read but } ou cannot, and which is written in small letters, ' ::eatod by the family of Ling in honor of the great man.' ' "There is no such inscription. said Ching. "There is." said Chang. So they both grew angry, and after abusing one another, agreed to refer the matter tt5 the high priest of the temple He heard the story, and then quietly said, "Gentlemen you are both wrong. Then is no tablet to read; it was Ncen into the interior of the temple yester- day." Pun anb FancV. A small boy was hoeing Born in a ste- rile field by the road -side, up near Bethel, Indian,, when a passer-by stop- ped and said: •' Pears to me your corn is rather small" "Certainly, said the boy, "It's dwarf corn." "But it looks yeller." "Certainly. We planted the yeller kind," "But it looks as if you wouldn't get mors than half a crop." "Of course not," said the boy' "We planted her on shares.' II Mei sale be bad • gat ng towns, .W so les arms she t000000eeeaaaiiiiiilllllly clowned. And love's sweet roundelay he songuf. Toe that. said he, my love. 1 guess Von eaaaot, menet love me Inc... Give me the little hand I pruem ! `vis thine, she maid. with gleam obl'ies°. While blushing roses dyed her calque— The twain will b. made one next wiser. TAgux 701 • TRAMP.—A good story is passed ground on Judge Grant, who stopped into the Santa Fe depot dressed in his mining suit. He walked up to the ticket toe and in his usual short, gruff manner, asked the price of a ticket to San Francisco. The agent, who took him for a tramp, said: "The price of an emigrant ticket is $12.33." The Judge, not fully satisfied with this reply, said: "By — sir, I want to know the price of a ticket to San Francisco." "I told you, sir, the price of an emigrant ticket is $12.35. If you don't want one just get out of the way." Imagine the agent's surprise when the Judge drew from his pocket a roll of bills, the smallest of which was $500, and told him he would like a state ro nn. Just as he was get- ting ready G. go to the hank and get the bill changed, the president of the road came along, and immediately recognized theJudge as an old acquaintance, and said to him: "Judge, my special car is going to 'Frisco this morning; will yob enjoy a seat with me 1" The agent slyly sauntered up and slipped the bill into the "tramps" hand, and crawled back to his desk, which was too high for him by about six inches. oso /being tt in the alyle, A Washington correspondent relates the following of ex -Senator McCreery: Some days before the adjournment of Congress, as the story goes, good-natur- ed and ponderous Senator MoCreery, of Kentucky, was waddling down Penusyl- ysnia Avenue when • dapper young gentleman, one of that class which de- lights "society girls" by exclaiming at intervals during a fashionable reception : "Have you been very gay this season Y" approached him with the question: "Ah, Senator, how de do ? I called on you this morning. Did you get mycard 1 "Yes," said the senator dryly, "I got the card; but what did you mean by b'riting 'E. P.' in the corner of it 1" "Oh, that," said the young gentleman, evidently delighted at being able to give information, "that, you known, means 'en persons —in other words, `left in person.' " `-Yes, yes," said the Senator, medita- tively, "I see." The next day Mr. 6fcCreery again met the young man., and this time, going up to him, said: "Ah, by the way, I called on )on this morning; did you get my tyre' r "Yes, sir; yes," was the reply; "1 got 't; but, I say, Senator, what in the world did you mean by writing 'S. B. A. N.' 'n the corner of it ?' "What? didn't you understand that 1 I'm surprised. What should I mean but 'sent by a nigger ?' " Were Ills Army Clesbes. It was Sunday evening. Angelica had invited her "best young man" to the evening meal. Everything had passed off harmoniously until Angelica's seven- year-old brother broke the blissful silence by exclaiming. "Oh, ,ins ! yer oughter seen Mr. Lighted the other night, when he called to take Addie to the drill. He looked so nice satin' 'long side of her with his arm—" " "- "Fred !" screamed the maiden, whore face began to ammo the color of a con- done crab—quickly placing her hand over the boy's month. "Yet- ought* seen him," continued the persist rat informant, after gaining his Meath, and the ant baru5ad girl's hand wriemored, "be had his arm—" "Freddie !" shouted the mother, as in her frantic attempts tq resell the boy's auricular appendage she upset the eon - tents of the teapot in Mr. Lighthead's lap, making numerous Russian war maps over his new -lavender pantaloons. "I was just goin' to say," the half [rig andb injured leaded, between a cry an injrd pleaded, "he had his arm—•• "You boy !" thundered kis fatker, "away to the wood -shed." And the boy made for the nearest 'zit, . zelabasd as he we/teed, "I was only goin' to my Mr. Ligktkesd had his araty dethee es, and I'll leave it to kiss if he didn't." ARE YOU Are you • Dyspeptic ? Have you Indigestion i Is your Liver sluggish 1 Does your food trouble you ! Does sleep fail to refresh you? Is your appe- tite and energy gone ? ZorrMA (from Brazil` will cure you, tone you up, and invigorate your whole system. It is s gentle purgative, acts av a wonder upon, and gives strength and energy to the Digestive apparatus. It is strongly anti - bilious, carries off all surplus bile, tones the Liver, gives sound Digestion and speedy health to the Dyspeptic and the Bilious. Try a 10 cent sample at least. memory Tr.. (news. A friend in need is s friend indeed. This none cart deny, espesially when as- sistance is rendered wbea one is sorely ',f- loated with disease, snore particuiarly Boss complaints and weaknesses so common to suer Trude population. Every woman should know that Electric Bitters are woman's true friend, and will positively tutore her to health, even when an ether remedies fail, A single trial al. ways proves our assertion. They are pleasant to the tug and only ant fifty meta a bottle Wold by all druggists .sea. .___- -- As a Family Medicine Dr. Canon's Stomach and Constipation Bitters are rapidly taking the place of pills, they are equally effectual, do not gripe, weak- en, or produce nausea and are purely vegetable. In large 8 oz. bottles at 50 cents. Geoge Rhynes special agent for Goderich. Fall Strews la 1561. South Huron, Exeter, Oat. 3. Central, at Guelph, Oct. 3 to 5 Central, at Hamilton, Oct. 4 to 7. East Waw•nosh, Belgrave, Oct. 11. Morris, Blyth, Oct 12. West Riding, at Goderich, on Wed- nesday. and Thursday, October 5th and Gth. East Riding, at Brussels, on Thursday and Friday, October Gth and 7th. Ashfield and Wawanosh Branch, at Dungannon, on Friday, the 7th of Octo- b*. ALL THE NEWS FOR A CENT. TIMM Torollto Daily World DETLOR & CO'S MAMMOTH SALE WILL CONTINUE THIS MONTH_ I BARGINS IN EVERY LINE GOODS O$N C LETL R PR IOE. OR & CO. RON'T F''ORGRT THAT E. DOWNINGS. is the place for FIRST CLASS BOOTS AND SHOES. W -Boots and Shoes repaired and made to order. THE ONLY ONS-CZNT MORNING PIPER IN CANADA. THREE DOLLARS A YEAR ! TWENTY-FIVE CENTS A MONTH! ONE CENT A COPY ! ! ! /Mess taws Waif 1be e est er say ether Iterates raper. il�Pgq1ee♦♦tle�11.. !•AA�rang NC 1T by ca vaeelag for ivreywbere. )Seed( postcard terms and (AMPLE COPT FREI. . WORLD PRINTING CO., tilt. Na 4 Rig street asst. Trysts. MANITOBA _ G. W. R. EXCURSIONS NEW BRANCH 2.bCneii=SOINT_ TOMMN TA1LORIi\TG-_ 1 have secured the services of Mr. Fred. Pridham as cutter. recommended to be one of the best titters in the county. Style, 5i and wostook of ip guaranteed. A large and well selected SCOTCH AND CANADIAN TWEEDS Just arrived. The stock of DRY GOODS ,and GROCERIES ousin ess most complete and customers favoring me with their trade In any line of my is also can rely upon getting good value and fair treatment. JOHN ' AOHESON. Maier 28 ill Mier 19 S)NAfelt aqtrO0. Rae. eet•sh THOS. GREENWAY L1, ref Ceatrans. Or to raw 111 JUST RECEIVED DIRECT FROM SZr,T'=R=OR_ The first consignment of the season of those justly celebrated SALMON TIIOUT —AT— L. PER91,7 SON'S Grocer, Hamilton street, Goderich. Extensive Premises ilnd Splendid Nero Stock. G-_ B A R R Y" CABINET LIFER AND upERT Hamilton Street, Goderic A good aessrtteent of Ktsebes. Deg -roost. DINni Room sad Parlor Fur•ittue. sue► M Tit Mea OWra (hair.oasis ad wood erased(. Cupboards. Bed-ateada Mattresses, Was Ireland w laa. *Asa t-sha4Yote. Looking Glasses. I N. D. -A esmpNte aremtCelinesat of Cee and Shrouds always on hand, also Hearses for N 'tretiree/We rates ctnro Frailties a sesetalty.—A rail solicited. 1751 C isle le wets atsf�dres save owe taw a_ Moe tl, lire Y bow every busis YstLLIgarret REIO £CROOL BOOB DEPOT. SCHOOL BOOKS! SUPPLIES SCHOOL AT THE LOWEST RATES SHEPPARD'S. g=NTg2L Carriage Worksl 33 P0== =.1% =.1% having leased the ahop of Mr. P. Bayree, is now engaged in the furs o £rat. class CARRIAGES, BUGGIES, WAGGONS, etc. Clive me a call, and I will give you prices that cannot he neaten in th county. REFAIRINCA tin JOBBING DONE KINTAIL CARRIAGE WORKS, 9., POINTER A LOT OF PRINTS AT COST AT Colborne Brothers. MEDICAL HALL, GODERICH. F. JORDAN, Chemist and Druggist MARKET SQUARE, GoDEhICH. Wholeaaleand Retail Dealer in D Cbembia1, Paints, 0Stuffs,, Dye Stu. Artist Colors Patent Medicines. Horse and Cattle Medicines, Perfumery, Toilet Articles, to. Physician+' Presaripttons carefully dtsponeed.Wg Holiday Presents At BUTLER'S Photo and Autograph Albums in great variety, Work Boxes, Writing Desks, very suitable for presents for Teachers and Scholars. P ESETS FOR EVERYBODY. - ALL CAN BE SUITED. Stock is New, very complete, and consists of Ladies' and Gents' Purses,' China Goods of all kinds, Ruby Goods, Vases in many patterns, In,ower Pots, Cups and Flowers, China and Wax Dolls! A Large Assortment. Smokers' Sundries—Merschaum Pipes and Cigar Holders and Brier Pipes -100 Different Styles. School Books, Miscellaneous Books Bibles, Prayer Books, Church Sermons, W'6.rL6Y'M Hynin Books, Psalm Books, &c. , &c. —Subscriptions taken for all the best ENottsa, ScareH, Iiusu, Aiesat.-Ali and CANADIAN Papers and Magazines at Publishers' lowest rates—now is the time to subscribe. A full stock of School Books, for Teachers and High and Model School Student] All will be sold cheap, and Patrons suited. I have a choice and large selection of Christmas and New Year's Cards! THEAYD BET EVER SHOWN, t l•HE�PLB THAN ITIR, At BUTLE ' 3 . Domini on Telegraph and Postage Stamp Owce. 1762 66 Dominion Carriage Works;" Goaerie/ MORTON AND CRESSMAN manufacturers of FIR.YT CLASS CARRIAC+ES, BUC+C+IES, eto. Opposite Colborne Hotel We solicit an examination of our yehicles. REPAIRING PROMPTLY ATTENDED TO. In Leaving Town whit to Mara my (basks to the 'ebbs for their patresye earwig to m . sad mrd tee same 1a tature, sad to ringed them tat I have kat a reliable perws Is serge et M bugloss_. REPAIRING AND PICTURE FRAMING w111 he dew es 82iORTEST NOTIOr. T_ CI -.33.6.1.47...i. 11 6