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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron Signal, 1880-10-29, Page 3.. .. y .--._-'-caw'.-.mow—�-••�•-�'�'� .•-��••��'-�� t.► I.11t1�i`>L1I'9 !Urn11.-••.•. TLTE HURON STGNAT.. FTT1" `' (►("1'6 ER 29 188U. 3 Fun an° Fanci, livery um., tuns hu ...I, reputar,• •1, t.. mate raid thus is why •I, .Wily awn wake such poor „ties. "it's uuly a fall opening, ora, the naughty buy said, as he exhibited his cunt trousers after tumbling from an apple true. A dull old lady being told that a cer- tain lawyer was 'lyiud at the poiut of death,' exclaimed : 'My gracious! Won't even death stop that man's lying( A lady wishes to know the twat Nay of Marking table -linen. Black berry pie i* uur choice, although a baby with a gravy dish is highly, esteemed by many. A lover who had gone west to snake a home for his "bride," wrote to her: "1 have got the finest quarter-sactiou of 4 land (one hundred and fifty urea) 1 ever put my foot down on." Bride wrote back: "Suppose you buy another quar- ter section, John, s, we can have a lawn round your foot. John "made a home," but Birdie never was mistress of it. - "Bub," said Tom, "which is the most dangerous word in the English Language to pronounce?" Don't know, unless it's a swearing word." "No," said Tom, "it's stumbling, because you are sure to get a tumble between the tint and last letter. "Ha, ha," said Bob. "Now I have one for you. Which is the longest word in the English Language?' "Vale- tudinarianism," responded Tom, prompt- ly. "No, air; it's smiles, baxauw there is a whole mile between the first and last letter." "Ah, that is nothing. I know s word that has over three utiles between its beginning and ending." "What is that?" asked Bob faintly. "Beleaguer- ed," exclaimed Tom, triumphantly. BALDHEADED PEOPLE. A baldheaded man is refined and he always show. his skull -sure. A good novel for bald heads to read- " The Lost Heir." What does a baldheaded wan .ay to his comb l We meet to part no more. Motto for a baldhead-Bare and fur - bare. However high a posittotl :t lsthilnpade d ratan holds, he will never comb down t0 the world. The baldheaded man nee er dyes. What does every baldheaded man putt on his head t }1 hat You never saw a baldheaded roan with • a low forehead. HANDIWORK. The grasp of the human race is in the hand. The hand of the baby with its chubbi- ness, all dimples, but the fingers, which wiggle aimlessly in forty seven dirrctlurs isn't it innocent and pretty 7 And how }nicely its wondrously -eyed owner can spread butter with it. The hand of the small boy, on a three weeks' vacation from the wash basin, be- grimmed knuckles, mourning fing(u'naila and a rag wound round its sore thumb This is the hand that steals cookies, jam and other goodies one minute, and parts the crust of a mud pie in innocent mirth the second. We were all smmall'uoy8 once -with perhaps a few feminiue excep- tions- t Thu hand of the young woman of the day, sparkling with diamonds and other jewels, mostly other. How its shapely fingers run np and down the piano key- board, and how daintily does it show its deftness in embroidery, fancy work, etc., and how seldom is it found in the bread tray or the wash -tub. The hand of a 'nether, lovingly leading us along the pathway of our childhood. How gratefully we remember ita admin- istration, even when they were heavy and were placed where they would do the most good. The hand of the farmer, hard and knotty, with knuckles like knobs, fingers all thumbs, unused and unfit for the &Linty oe:upations of life. It grasps the prosperity of the cotuftry right by the crop. The hand of the speculator is in every one's pocket but his own. The hand of the intelligent compositor swinging over his case with rapid regu- larity, raising the complete "printer's devil" with editorial brain -work, and holding the editor up to the unpitying gaze of the world as a consumate fool. it is the worst hand played. The hand of *marriageable young lady always stretched forth, and jnst as you think you have got it for life it vanishes 'Ti. well. Only a few of these species are worth having. The haat of an old friend, As it settles into your 'with one long grateful Eleni. Nothing in this world ever starts the tre- moan ..f the nerves from the brain cen- tre and anuses • thrill so permeating to the will es its grasp, ij The real pretty hand .synsmetncal in every finger joint. make* the owner lust vain enough to granefulls reef her face ap..n it as often as anybody would he likely to loo,k st it The hand of the dear 'Id 'grandmother Wrinkled with goodness, by age that has mpered .ts old-time severity, ,t now ,a t.o the wrists m hanelk+ent and kindly ii • f.., ,hr young kb tockr u the v•nna enemy wh. .su• depend .r, rhe .n ,erf..eM..•. .e , f,tandetothwv • nand ttoudeha1O !flails Ptaaa.su OHIoee- Peel'and we them m milk and water a few moments. put cloves. spice. pepper and salt into your vinegar; and boil them in brass; turn it on your 0100111 and cover them tight. BAKED Amar Pare and quarter and lay totem in a skillet; sprinkle each layer with sugar,small pieces of butter and grated nutmeg; set tU the oven and bake. 1 thinkithis much neer than stewing. A Nike WAY ro PR&YARB °ABRADE. To one quart ,f chopped cabbage with salt and pep t., taste, pour over hot one oup of vi , • large tableepoonfu' of sugar, cue tablespoonful of butter, cover, and let it steam. SQuArt1 Pier. -Buil and sift • good dry squash, thin it with boiling milk un• til it is about the consistency of thick milk porridge. To every quart of this add three eggs, two great spoonfuls of melted butter, nutmeg (or ginger if you prefer), and sweeten quite sweet with sugar. Bake in a deep plate with an undercruat. PICKLING CABBAGE.- Take half a dozen small red beets, boil, and when cold chop up fine with • lush knife. Take one large head of cabbage, chop up the saute way, anis all together, add salt and blr.ck pepper to your taste, • half teaspoonful cayenne pepper, pack in a creek, °over with good vinegar, and it will keep for months. INDIA Pn'ELL-Carefully follow ibis : -Take three quarts of vinegar, quarter pound mustard, half ounce of black pepper, one ounce cloves, one ounce all- spice, one ounce tumeric, one ounce gin- ger, one ounce cayenne pepper, handful of salt, and the same of sugar; boil for twenty minutes. When cold put in the vegetables, cucumbers, unions, cauli- flower cut up small, and cover closely. If the liquid should seem thin, buil again and add more mustard in three wee:ke after making. BREAD FntrrEnrl wITH LEMON SAUCE. - Take slices v: stale bread and cut off the crust. making them of uniform shape. Soak these in a custard made of one egg, one cup "f milk, a tablespoonful of sugar, and a little flavoring. Remove them be- fore they get so soft ss to break, dip each slice in n,"".d bread crumbs, thea in beaten egg, then in bread crumbs again, and fry to a gulden brown in Lot lard. Fur the sauce, cream together a cup .,f sugar and half a cup of butter, stir in one egg, well beaten, aid the juice and half the grated peel of one lemon. Beat well and then stir in gradu- ally half a cup of hot water. Set the bowl on top of the boiling teakettle until it thickens, stirring occasionally. T)o not allow it to buil. SALT RISIN° BREAD. -The night be- fore you want to make your bread, take a pint of sweet milk and heat 'it scalding hot; then stir in corn meal until it is as thick as mush; keep it by the fire at night. The next morning take a tea- cupful of water as hot as you can bear your finger in it; pour it in the mush and thicken it with flour as thick as you can stir it, put it in a pot of water as warm as you can hear your finger ir. In a °hurt time it will be to the top of your cup; then take as much water as you wish to make your bread with, and have it warn; thicken with flour, and when cool enough, stir your ruing in it it will be ready to unix in an hour or leaa time; prix pretty stiff; grease your pans well; also grease your bread on top, and as soon as light enough, put it in the oven and bake it. Don't let it stand after it is light. VERY SEVEr.s --A lawyer who was bad- gering a colored witness in a District of Columbia court by caking him if he had not been covictud of larceny, assault and arson, receiving a negative reply in every case,he finally enquired: - 'Have you ever been in the penitenti- ary?' Yes, soh.' Attorney smiled complacently, and re- sumed: How many times have you been in the penitentiary?' 'Twice, Bah.' 'Where?' 'in Baltimore, sah.' 'How long were you there the first time?' 'About two hours, soh.' 'How long the second timet' asked the attorney, rather crestfallen. 'An hour, sah. i went there to white -wash a cell for a lawyer who had robbed his client.' JOHN AC±[ESON '1. twirl at dvr'ny The path few earth .a.sar'. X6,000 worth of Now Goods HE WILL NOT BE TJNDDRSOLD- Isupectba of my Mammoth Stock is reepeottally Invited. Every lire complete. 1752 JOHN ACHESON, Kgaare, Goderidh. BOOTS AND SHOES. E_ 8z S_ DOW1-TING Have lust received an IMMENSE STOCK of Boom and Sbots ter Fall and Winter wear, of very choice quality and very low In prior. We are determlosd to give our Customers the benefit of experience and capital In placing be fo�e the every variety of Uoods in our line and at such pricer It will defy the keenest corvine talon. Please can and examine our goods and prices whether you bqy or not. — Custom Work receives our special attention and every (snort nude to suit and plea our customers. E. & J. DOWN;AO, t'rahh's Block TO THE TRADE. LRATIej1 and FINDnsoe in any geazUty, and at lowest eriees. (1751) The Square, - - - G-oderioh. If You Want Good GROCERIES, PROVISIONS, CROCKERY, GLASSWARE, —400 TO— D. FERGUSON'S Hamilton Street, Opposite Bailey'e Hotel. In addition to the °nlitiery Ilnee of the Grocery and Crockery Trr-dc- I carry a full stock of Floor.. Meals, Pork and Cenral ProPsioll. MY MOTTO IS, "Fair Dealing and Moderate Prices." coal Oil also sold. See ay Stock aad Be say }floes. Ar Goods de'•vored to any part of the Town. i D. Ferguson. • Tile Greatest Misery aweww. De. Kneo ,. New Dtae•ovaav for Con- sumption is certainly thegt'eatsst• medi- owl remedy ever placed within the reach of suffering humanity Thousands of once hopeless sufferers, now loudly pptt''s� dsim their praise for this wonderful Dia- oovery to which they owe their lives. I Not nilly does it positively mire OM. , snmption. hut Coughs. Colds, rand 1 Broesehit.ia, Hay Fever Boar,eness all affections of the Throat, Chew and Lunge yield at ..nee to M. wonderful curative powers as d by nee vv. do 1 not sAk you to buy s Ian* bet& NIA you know what yen are getting. We therefore earnestly request you b alit i on now etrnmet. P Jordan, seed ret a trul bottle for ten oenta wbiel, will east vine the most skeptical 4 its wounder•• 1 fel motets. and show roe what • revile , mnr dollar sire hi -4u. will d.. Raw nolo by R i••Man 1761 AMI1 I±t'tow�.ty !A111 • arta ? rc. s `19 +, S.rtal ,El i. .i91i ONE Oar THE OLDEST AND MOST RELIABLE REMEDIES IN THE WORLD FOR 1,IE CURE OF Coughs, Colds, Hoarseness, Sore Throat, Br3nchitis, Influenza, ;roup, V/hooping Cough, Asthma, and every affection of the Throat, Lungs, and Chest, including CONSUMPTION. A WELL-KNOWN PHYSICIAN W(tITES. " It does not dry wt u cough, and leave the cause behind, as is t:. case arta w'.1 prcparalions, but loosens it, dresses the lungs and allays im- , talion, that a wotisq the cause of complaint." DO NOT lit DECEIVED by articles bearing a sircilar name. Be sure you get DR. W1S'l'AK'S BALSAM OF t"ILD CHERRY, with the signsttre of " I. BUTTS " on the carp er. 50 Cents and $1.00 a Bottle. Pre- pared 'ry Sirn W. FowLr & Sorts, Boston, Mass. Sold by druggists and dealers generally. wrlc. _ V • it I. A Protected Solution of the Protoxide of iron, is •• easily digest- 1 and assimilated with the blood as the simplest food. eP_.en the blood dons not ontain th-• usual quantity of Iron, the deem. -icy can ..e supplied by the use of the PER('VIA N c'YRUP. It cures a "thalaand ills" simply .frotnwe Pr, iteVIOO&Arum. and Y••atrarso tine system. The enriched and lei • zed h1 . e perw1eaten every part of the Neil , reps iring damages and waste, s.arohin,, OM morbid secretions, and leaving nothing for &nem to find upon TMs I. the secret et the wes`rf1s1 nieces. of fhb remedy in raring Dyspepsia. 1-iver Complaint, Boils, Dropsy, Chronic Disrrhma. Nervous Affections. Femalk Complaints. And all disease. „rigindfng in • had anew .•t the Meed, er ace.n pt"••d t ♦ debllkv .w • 1 .Lata of the trysails OAU TIOA.—iR. mare fat crit tr. .' t tuPIA IV f rRnP' Bela hearsedes pow sally. P.mp►Mes twat free to soy addss.ss . I. Sam W Powis • Sows, Proteist.�• eoa 1y. dens A veerae Resew Wu. OUR OFFER. . To Intending Subecri hers We will send TEs Hs•aon Ate,..., from wow till J-!•YI'I RE- tsa: Me mall the Hausa. from nun 1111 Ncn \'ear'. for 15 Cutts A distinct and peculiar combination. FELLOWS' COMPOUND SYRUP OF HYP-PHOS-PHIT S 0 E FOR THE RELIEF AND CURE amu. WASTING DISEASES, Consumption, As!hma, General Debility, Brain Exhaustion, Const'na*ion, Chronic Diarrhoea., Dyspepsia, o: Lofts ..t Nervous Powe:. It is un- equalled in the treatment of Palpitation of the IT Aust. Trembling of the Hands and Limbs, Lose of Appetite, Energy or Memory itadawfthvigor, gentleman asd sebtletr, owing to the exquisite harmony of its lnre.L•uts, akin t„ p:r• b.•ra1 it 'f. i • taste is pleasant, and Itietfeetsi.-r.nauent. 1:... first apparent effect ie t 1 tucrtase the appetite. 1t assists digestion, and tenses 1004 to assimilate proper'y—thus the system n nomnah'i. It alta, by iu tonic scti,r en tho digestive organs, induces more copious and r :alar .•.0.ti,,,,.. The r.l.i gty vorgans,er ith which promos take on dash while under tb • 1..'aenee t.f the Syrup, of itself indicates that no other pr •psration cm be better uirp:e.1 to l.e'p and nourish th., constitution, and hence be more ed'iucinu iu a;1 dcpr.ssiun of s . nt shaking or tmmbltug of the hands or body, cough, shortness of breath, or co..su,uptive habit. The nerves' and muscles become strength -nett aid the Wood pnr:fi .1. V.Ii.AT THF. INVENTOR, MR. -FELLOWS, HAS 'I'(I SAN' ABOUT HIS SYRUP e.r THE 1HYP2PHOI,PiHIIES. to the sum,uer ne 1864, 1 w.,a suddenly elf,eted Ly a c'p;ona expectoration of :a^: n-parole:A n. Iter. 1 had been deciiniug iu health fir a,.ue menti'., and, being ere•sslingiy n tv.,•:s, t1.. 1.ymptoros austd alarm. As my bu.ine,s was that of • .1 •.p. using chcn:..2, ti., aiu.p Was constantly visited by u:e itcal men, all of whom tendered their advice. During 1864 and 1865 my 42:1 At wee exuuiaed by ten first tars physicians, Nome of whom pronu.toeed the Caw Bronchitis ; sugn•, not willing to '°aloe alarm, or unwilling to v••Irture an-pit:iun, gsve no deci. u. ; *nue stated tiro equivocally that 1 hal Tubereuiu D.seaot of th • Lmtgs, and iueat.'d'1the trouble where the pale were felt. By professional advice, I us.d, in tura, horse -back emsr- eie•, canntry life, eggs enol ale in the morning, tonin, Bourbon whiskey, cod-liver oil, ch.:o :coy, tar, aid v .r.cus iuhalenta, but the trouble increased. F.xpector•tion be- came more profuse and otfsoaire, Night -sweats set in. Cold chills, diarrho,ti dyspncsa, Dough, blood -streaked ezpectorations, leas of deep, loss of appetite, leas of memory, loss of ambition, accompanied by general prostration, showed themselves. l; oder the microdoope the blood was found to contain but a small portion of vitalized corpnacles; the heart's action was feeble ; the pulse intermittent : the stomach could not digest properly, so that flatulency and acidity was the reenit. Finding the 83m: toms indicated Consumption, I determined to use every effort to stay its progress, and, if possible, to care it. I selected the most powerful tonics and moderators, snd com- bined them with the vital Constituents of the human body. For months 1 ind•'.v- ored to amalgamate them before my efforts were crowned with auroea.. I not speak too plainly or too strongly of the Eileen produced, and the benefits 1 :• •-. e1 from the composition. t first my appetite:aereesed ; t'.e esp•ctoratiun became easy, digestion better ; t1/4, nixes beea•ne agora c,pions and let, Ir epnent ; cold chills ceased ; night -sweats lessened ; I g•ised la weight ; the hacking cough left mo ; rcfreshiug sleep returned ; my spirits became buoyant, the mind active and vigorous. I continued taking the Syrup month after month ; but o ming to the damp, foggy climate of St. John, my recovery was necessarily slow, although I could observe a gradual return of strength for three years, during which time i oontintted taking the remedy. My pres•+nt weight is one hundrd and eighty-eight, being thirty-eight above my usual. I hav4110 symp- tot:. ft d nttt,'dis•ase. The only no'ablesign during twelve months was the cep cu, ati •••, '`i .w the by etopp d, and I consider rnyarlfw'll. The reader may ask, lune d . v -u know y9Jr difficulty to have proasd d from ulcerd.d or tuheren- lat. d la :g ? I aus.rer, In the most certain of ail modes for 11.4C01' Rifling. i.i �fa'ah last I coughed from the tight lung a piece of PIIO.PHATE OF LiME, had t:,e ilea of a pot, which could hay.• cone from no other place, te.d which the hibt:esta'thority in Lung D.seases ('Laennec) states is the r•sult of tnberc'e, which has ken cured. Added to this, I dud the leaden cnlere 1, purulent, Wood • etre tketi es; erk,ratin••, and tits opi&on of one of the lest disInoost,cicos in th•' c.snnhy. I belie..., i h .v I. *pr. ie: ced all the symptoms i .ei !.ant to the two first ra„,ses of Cons^.lotions sad I eve eucces,fuily coubatte•l them, s.) tuts I do not d of aim ens, w eii•the:, is lift sufficient lung tissue t. bu'l l ups,:,, 1 cal only eld thet,. r no r• mn'wts y ca eudets. rim, of i i-roa•rd Fide{ woa1.1 1..'t-er , .dnc. •n to i'.• i ii 1:1is •(.1....t, 1,11 a a:.,'Te sympathy for the pa;rConana ptivr• with olitaz i' .::`. I to • 110 icy(' it vi• anytetsiI.,. 11 tp ctfu :•, •1.1X': 1.rr. S, Ise dsr «f F. '•i .. cryo .,.. Sy; u;, of I1;,p phot,1sdu SOLD BY ALL bfltJc' ;IS'I'S. When Fr11'wa' Compound Syrup of lltypepitoc•phltes is r.?, • n.,l, fur 'FELLOWS' COMPOUND SYRUP," 4ad be nr se istik4loa ie l':sbd or d6ber 4Ni.1g artist Kitt,. p.4. TM" t:E'i D f .11 A •A.A •s1LL 'Ott PERRY DAVIS & SOM. & LAWRENCE, Agents for the Dominion of Canada, MONTREAL. SUBSTITUTES ! er The putnnc are cautioned against a custom which crowing quite cnmm.m of late among a certain taus ,.f medicine realer.. and which is thy. : When a.sled 1st 1 bottle of Pita- killer. they soddenly diserer lttat thcv art "anM rat." "hat Manother article ire Ili g!xal. if not Miter." which thew will amply at the mal once. Ile object of this deception is transparent. These ehttirsees are made unto sell nu the great reputation et he L $•Ether; and being commanded of the n -is)' and cheaoest distr. are hnwi•ht M the dealer at Aar hn 1 what he paws for the genuine sls-Y , wldd enables him therein,* to realise a few rents more }wok ,er lent'_ upon the Weitatignrrete k ibm ho . i. ,n y� n �i �s± For SUOOD1EN COI ; Natwre, wttseeawww .ate •lWrit PAIN, th \ht ...RI .s 'M► bus•'. jRR' ',AVIS 'AIN-K1LLEk 'h . .►.sn• a, ..- ..e. ,t M.,.. .... a• •s e • gat . sa a /a.t ate .0 . • ..w. ' •••r-# a -.t .. .. •... v-r.B• .-...b .h , .-T-N AA►-�s .r,.. . , a, .wrM. ..... .. .