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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Wingham Advance-Times, 1940-12-19, Page 20PAGE TWELVE WINGHAM ADVANCE-TIMES "i And then she said without meaning to, "uncle Ed sent us a silver platter for a—” Joel’s eyes turned toward hers, away . rfoin the gray sky with its whisking clouds.' Her eyes were dark and wiue and her face was pale and sad. “Jinny, are you sure you don t wan’t to go through with it?” The train rumbled on the uneven roadbed and the cinders settled light­ ly over everything with the finality of the despair that closed around Jinny’s heart as she bit her lips. Then she said, "Marriages can be happy, 1 guess -—at least they can be successtul, even if both sides aren’t in love, Only — it seems to me that is being satisfied with second best. And for us, Joel,” her voice was very low, “I would want the best.” Life stretched before Joel, suddenly bleak and gray. He said, “Dusty’ll have to carry on the Paine tradition, I guess.” Jinny’s breath stopped as suddenly everything became clear. How could she have been so blind as not'to know what was in Joel’s mind! It all fitted perfectly. Of course it had been Sue ■ Garland all the time. When the bob­ sled-tipped over, hadn’t Joel rushed for Sues’ Hadn’t Dusty done the same thing? Hadn’t she seen Sue in Joel's arms? Hadn’t there always been a wistful, restrained note in Joel’s voice when he spoke to Sue? Jinny said, “Joel, are you in love with Sue?’’ Joel turned his head. “Yes,” he said miserably, “so what?” “Oh!” 'Jinny’s voice was cold and • frightened. Though she had not ad­ mitted it, all this time she had clung to the faint hope that something else had occupied and disturbed Joel. This was the end. “But she’s engaged to- Dusty!” Joel was as glad as Jinny when they reached Brattleboro and Jinny had to get Off. Joel was going on to Green­ field to keep an appointment with the toy people. The silence between them had grown significantly uncomfort­ able. “Be seein’ you,” Joel said as he went with her to the vestibule of the car, “before I go tomorrow.” “Tomorrow!” echoed Jinny. “Be­ fore Christmas!” “Well, yes. Thought I would. Good luck! Of course you’ll get the job.” Jinny’s hands were wet with nerv­ ousness and her heart beat rat-a-tat- tat in her breast as she climbed the steps of the brick building. “I mUsn’t , let him know how frightened I aitt. 1 ^mustn’t let him see if X don’t get this ■—there is nothing. I must be calm land relaxed and tell him exactly what [?I cah do.” The waiting was the worst. Jinny clasped and unclasped her hands and swallowed. It was much like waiting in a dentist’s office when you know you need a nasty filling. Afterwards she knew it was even worse than the interview which was so painfully and quickly over. Even worse than when she heard the cold words in her ears. “We-ell, you say yourself that you haven’t had any experience in handling young­ sters.’ When she left, hardly conscious of what she was doing, she walked down to the station, sat up on a high stool and ordered a cup of coffee. Now it was under her nose, the steam rising. She hadn’t had the right courses for what he wanted. She hadn’t had any experience. He would keep her appli­ cation on. file and if anything else came up — but that was riothing. It was just politely glossing over the fact that this particular job Was not for Jinny. She kept thinking, "I must have some time alone., I must get things straight. I must‘think them through.” But her mind went round and round and she kept hearing first the super­ intendent’s cold words, and then Joel’s as he had ended things for good and all on the train. He was going away tomorrow. “Tf.I took poison, or jumped out of the window, I’d probably make a mess of that. I just haven’t that kind of courage. And I can’t help thinking what that would da to Mother and Father. If I were only alone and no­ body cared — I could just end it all.” And then she thought, “Sue Garland hasn’t any right at all to both Dusty and Joel. A black chill shook her. “She doesn’t care a peanut for Joel. She hasn’t any right to make him so Unhappy. He would be a lot happier With me—” The train whistled. Jinny paid for Tier coffee and left it on the counter. CHAPTER XXI “Grari,” said Sue, “what is the use of Hyihg fho piano tuned? If it’s you happy. Say something. Jinny, -please say something!” Jinny shook her head sadly, don’t know what to say,” CHAPTER XX Jinny Ransom had been doing some good hard thinking. She had come to the conclusion that whatever had hap­ pened to Joel, had happened on his trip to New York. Even though he had actually proposed after he came back, he had 'been curiously restless and unlike himself. She had supposed, of course, that it was because he had failed to get Dusty to invest in his plan for the mills. But her instinct told her that somewhere there must be another girl. Jinny thought of * all this as she' stood before the hall mirror and put on her hat. She heard her mother’s voice. “Jinny, you’ll miss the train, if you don’t hurry.” Less distinctly, “I can’t understand you, Jinny. Last week you were all excited over being married. Whatever in the world Joel’s going to think when you go traipsing off to teach, I can’t help wondering. I don’t know whether you know it or not — but marriage isn’t a thjng you can put .on and take off like your coat and hat.”“Oh, Mother 1” Jinny said it to the white-faced image in the mirror. “Please stop it. If I don’t get this job, I’ll certainly die. Joel doesn’t want to marry me — and at this mo­ ment I certainly don’t want him to — if he doesn’t want to. I’ve always known how he felt, and because we sort of drifted into this, there isn’t any reason why we should go on with it, is there?” Jinny knew her mother couldn’t hear. Mrs. Ransom came out of the din­ ing room. “I 'thought maybe you’d want the letter, Jinny.” Her kind blue eyes were bewildered as she looked at her daughter. “Jinny — I -— I only want you to be happy, dear.” “I know it, Mother.” Jinny threw ' her arms warmly around Mrs. Ran­ som. “Don’t worry. I’m screamingly happy at this moment, and if; you’ll do a little concentrated thinking on the bent who is to interview me at eleven o’clock in battleboro, it’s all . I want.” “There’s your father with the car. I do hope he has his chains on. Good­ bye, dear.” The nine fifty-five was whistling as the Ransom car drew up at the old . brown station and Jinny dashed out to get a ticket. For a second she doubted the familiarity of the tweed coat in front of her at the window.i “Joel!” she gasped. | He turned around, incredulous. “Jinny!” And then it was all confusion as the train, breathing out a white plume of smoke, its wheels turning furiously, came into the station. Joel took Jin­ ny’s arm and- they dashed up just as the conductor leaned down the plat­ form and yelled, “All aboard!” “Well,” said Joel casually, after he hung up their coats 'and they had set­ tled back in the green plush seat, “I am about to lease the mills to a toy manufacturer.” “Oh!” asid Jinny. She drew off her gloves and rolled them with meticu­ lous care into a little ball. “Oh! A toy factory.” She was thinking, “He wouldn’t do that if he weren’t simply desperate.” But now he was asking her what she was doing on the early train. “Christmas shopping?” “No. It’s about a teaching job. One of the teachers is quite ill and they need someone to start the second sem­ ester. After New Year’s.” Joel was thoughtful as the white fields edged with ‘dark green pines flew by. “It isn’t exactly as we plan­ ned, is it Jinny?” “No, it isn’t, But we can be friends, Joel. And if it wasn’t going to work I guess it’s better to know right now, before we messed up things. What are you going to do after you lease the mills?” * “Oh, I’m going to bum around a while and see America. A college chum of mine has a car and we think we’ll see what the west coast looks like. I’ve just come to the conclusion if you don’t see a little'of what the world is like when you’re young, you just never do.” As' if Jinny couldn’t hear the ache in his voice under the casual inflec­ tion! “That sounds swell,” she managed. “And then, eventually, I may go in­ to advertising. Dusty’s firm. Settle down, you know.” Jinny thought, “I don’t care what happens to me, ever, if Jbel can be happy. But I can’t help him either if J don’t know what’s wrong, can I?” tuned I’ll play it, and then I’ll try to sing and then—" . . “Mebbe you’d rather 1 hioveti it out to the carriage house,” shapped Gran. “No-o, I didn’t meat!, that.” . “AH right. Then wC'll have it .tim­ ed. Conte Christmas', it’s nice to have a little music. You might as well get used to the fact that yours wasn’t the only voice in the world. Mebbe if you could shake off this hangdog look of yours and limber up your fingers on some of them Christmas hymns, we’d all have „ii .merrier Christmas. And tiOw that I think of it, to me you don’t exactly act' like an engaged, girl.”. The morning sun cast bright lights in Sue’s hair. She wore a blue Angora Sweater and a dark blue skirt as she carefully watered Gran’s numerous red-leaved plants. “Gran’s soul is as mellow as an old apple, but you’d never know it from her tongue. But she-’s right. I won’t get my voice, back by staying away from the piano.” Aloud she said, “I don’t feel awfully engaged right now. Since you insist that I‘ can’t get married until June, it seems forever.” “June,” said Gran crisply, “is. as good a month as any to 'be married. Now will you get Jinny Ransom on the phone?” She spilled a little water on the table as she put. down the crackled brown pitcher. Jinny’s name brought back the recollection of the bright laughter in her voice, and the answer­ ing gayety in Joel’s. Jinny,” she said, “is a lucky girl.” “Just what,” asked Gran, peering Up sharply, “do you mean by that?” She felt the warm confusion on her cheeks as she said . hesitatingly,. “I mean she Is simple — .instinctive. What she wants most in life is a neat little house,.a nice husband and some children, with their faces washed, their hair combed.” Sue’s voice was carefully light and casual. “And that’s all you know about it. One person knows mighty little what’s going on in another person’s mind. You don't live this life smoothly, Susie. If you get to lookin’ around in other people’s affairs, you’ll find troubles, my words.” In 'all the years Gran had had it, she had never become quite used to the phone. To her it was a contrap­ tion, and she held the receiver far .away from her ear and talked into it in an unnaturally loud voice. ^Now she said, “This you, Tinny? Drop in this afternoon.” Wliicli had the sohnd dr a curt command Und was.not as Gran meant it — a simple and pleas­ ant invitation. When Jinny arrived late in the snowy afternoon, Sue was gone, load­ ed with the details of one of Gran’s extensive shopping lists. Gran sat be­ side a bright grate fire and a well­ laden tea tray. . Jinny pressed the point of the thin silver spoon, against the lemon, and its sharp spicy, fragrance wafted up. She had never in her life known any­ one like Gran. It was incredible that her hair should still be more dark than gray; that she should be so vig­ orous. The only signs of age, al­ though her face was set into number­ less wrinkles, were being slow on her feet and dependence on a cane. But she had more clear-headed vision, more knowledge of present-day con­ ditions and more energy than Jinny’s own mother. Who was scarcely half her age and whose hair was as white as snow. Gran’s purpose in asking Jinny to come this afternoon, she explained as she passed a plate of lacy cookies, was to give Jinny the mittens for the newsbovs. She had made tweny-four pairs. She didn’t say she had tucked a dollar bill into the palm of each mit­ ten. “And now, Jinny,” said Gran, “do you think your ma and pa could spare you Christmas Eve to help us with the tree-trimmin’? We’re havin’ a party and then we’re a-goin’ to Eph- riam Jones’ Christmas service at nine o’clock.” Jinny hesitated. “I guess Joel hasn’t told you, Gran, but he won’t be here.”. Gran sipped her tea noisily. “Non­ sense. Of, course he’s a-goin’ to be here.” “No, he isn’t. I saw him vesterdav and he’s leaving for good. He’s going tonight. And—” Jinny’s face twisted wrvly “—Gran, he has leased the mills to a toy manufacturer. Gran — I wouldn’t care to come — anywav — you see — we’re riot to be married af­ ter all.” “Well, now,” said Gran in a voice unusually tender, “I’m sorry about that, Jinny.” I’m sorry about both things you told me. Openin’ the mills, even if it didn’t make a great amount of money, would bq $ goof| thji^g for ub here, as well as for Joei. Why, the last time I saw him, he was all afire to do it. Gome to think of it, he has not been around much lately.” Jinny put down her cup:of tea and clasped both hands over her knee; “Gran; what shall I do?” And she went on and related her talk with Joel, and the interview the day before. Gran was very quiet. .Then she said, “Jinny, nobody can tell you what to do. Sometimes things look pretty dark, I’ve lived eighty-one years and I’ve seen some mighty dark places in that time. I remember once — well, it don’t matter now — but Dexter, he was my husband, did something pret­ ty foolish, and right on top of that there was a fire which burned about half the town and our property and ’twas just time for Sue’s mother to be born, and I couldn’t think of a way to turn. And another time — well, we ’ won’t go into it — but when Sue’s mother died after her brother a few years before her, I just couldn’t think there was anything in life for me. But there was. I’ve been happy. There was Sue, who was just another dau­ ghter, and there was Dot, who was very close, too, although not like Sue, because Dot still had her own mother. There was a great 'deal. There always is something to hang on to, my dear. Ohly you have to look for it. It never comes to you. You’re too young to know it, but whatever happens is Us­ ually for. the best. The things you push tod hard are the ones that won’t come right.- If yoU cati ever let go, sometimes they Come back to you.” Gran sighed. The doorbell rang sharply. “Now, Jiiitty, you come to this tree trimmin’. And hly stars! You’d better skip ihtb the lavatory dnd Wash yotir face, .of sOhtcbody Will think you’ve been d-cryitl’.- It’s the door on yotir fight.”Jinny skipped gratefully into the darkness of the little room to an aii- cient marble-topped washstand with thin copper spigots and above it a wavy mirror. There was the scent of fragrant soap, a bar of immaculate fringed towels. Outside, she could hear Gran’s slow steps growing' faint­ er as she went into the front hall. “Why, Joey,” called Gran, “ain’t it a beauty? I never saw such a tree. Never in all my life. You can drag it right into the parlor, snow and all. Theres a sheet down all ready for it.” Joel tugged and strained and pres­ ently one of the largest hemlock trees ever raised in White Creek, lifted its proud tip to the Very ceiling.. Par­ ticles of ice and StiOW' Which CiUtig to it loosened, melted and. dripped, 83 it filled the house with it$s spicy Odor, the very essence of Christmas . Joel said apologetically, “I almost forgot the tree, Gran. Then at the last minute I remembered.” “At the last miniite?” repeated Gran. “Yes,” said Joel hurriedly. “I’m leaving -tonight. By the way, Gran, I've leased the mills.” “Who to?” Joel told her and she sniffed, loud­ ly. “And now what are you going to do?” “See the world for a while. Prob­ ably end up with Dusty.” “Joel,” said Gran sharply, “not so long as I’m able to speak are. you a- goin’ to run away from a situation which isn’t to your likin’. I knew your father and grandfather and they were men who stood and faced whatever they had to. You’re being selfish and loutish and weak. I’m ashamed of you.” Joel averted his eyes and grinned sheepishly to cover his embarrass­ ment. "I mean it — every word,” said Gran. "Another thing, Joey,” Gran’s voice had. changed, I’m an old wo­ man. I ain’t a-goin’ to have many more Christmases and I’ve counted on a real one this time. With all of you. It wouldn’t be Christmas without you, Joey.” “All right, Gran, you win. Christ­ mas, but no longer.” A, Jittle later, as they walked down the path., Joel took Jinny’s arm. He leaned his head toward her with a lit­ tle of his old intimacy. . In the silence of the dark street, Jinny’s voice floated back happily. “Gran was right,” she was thinking. “If you can only let things go—sottie- times they come back to you.” Sue, her arms laden with packages, opened the gate soon after Joel and Jinny had closed it. She watched the two dim figures until they merged with the darkness, and stood motioti- less a long time, staring after them. I ain’t a-goin’ to have many CHAPTER XXII Stephen’s secretary took the receiv­ er off tjie Ipoft paid that she Was,