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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2008-12-18, Page 5THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, DECEMBER 18, 2008. PAGE 5. Bonnie Gropp TThhee sshhoorrtt ooff iitt Snow much fun The aquarium is gone. Everywhere, giant, finned cars nose forward like fish; a savage servility slides by on grease. – Robert Lowell There is the Sting Ray, of course. And the Marlin. And the Barracuda – though it isn’t essential to have scales to be immortalized in steel. Horses do well too – Charger, Bronco, Pinto, Mustang. Birds are also fully represented: Blackhawk, Falcon, Thunderbird and Lark. Even insects – Wasp, Scarab, Hornet and Beetle – make the cut. What do all these critters have in common? Well, they’re all members of the animal kingdom, but they are also the names of cars. We love to name our vehicles after animals (I haven’t even mentioned Impala, Jaguar, Cougar, Bobcat, Lynx, Rabbit, Ram and Fox). The reason for this long-time love affair may have been uncovered in a study conducted by researchers at the University of Vienna. The study suggests that subconsciously we think of cars as living creatures. The researchers presented 40 young adults –half male, half female – with photographs of the front ends of 38 late-model automobiles, all the same colour. “What do you see?” the researchers asked. “A face,” was the overwhelming answer. More than 90 per cent of the cars evoked a face for members of the study group. They considered the headlights to be ‘eyes’ looking back at them. They regarded the radiator/grill to be a nose and mouth. Many of the cars had more than faces; they had Attitude. Some friendly; some not. Sounds primitive and it probably is. You and I are only alive today because our ancestors were better than their neighbours at danger recognition. Our prehistoric forebears could ‘read’ the facial expressions of strangers and other animals swiftly enough to decide whether they were friend or foe. The quick studies, like your kin and mine, survived. The slower ones? Sabre-toothed tiger bait. Car makers picked up on this curious human tic a long time ago. That’s why the front ends of so many cars look dominant, masculine, arrogant – even angry-looking. Stands to reason if we buy such a car, it’s on our side, right? Mind you, not every customer wants a macho marauder for personal transportation. Some drivers prefer friendly, submissive faces in their carport. Smartcars don’t look tough or threatening. Neither do the Volkswagen Beetle, the Nissan Micra or the Kia Picanto. But auto designers have to be very careful where they draw the line. A car can look cute, but not wussy. And you definitely don’t want the front of a new car to put potential customers in mind of, um, bodily orifices. You could ask the designers of the ill-fated Ford Edsel about that. However we design them and whatever we name them, there’s no question that the automobile profoundly influences the lives we lead as North Americans – for better and for worse. The U.S. architect Philip Johnson pronounced the automobile “the greatest catastrophe in the entire history of city architecture”. John Keats, the author and native of Kingston, Ontario went even further. He wrote a bestseller called The Insolent Chariots, in which he said: “The automobile changed our dress, manners, social customs, vacation habits, the shape of our cities, consumer purchasing patterns, common tastes and positions in intercourse.” Oh – and don’t forget lethal. In the past 50 years more than 200,000 Canadians have died either at the wheel or under them. That’s more than we lost in both World Wars combined. Anyway you slice it, the four-wheeled gas guzzlers rule. They define our cities and they endlessly crisscross our rural spaces. They dictate where we live and work, they bloom like viruses in our public spaces and they attach themselves like barnacles to our expressways, streets and laneways. Someone asked the American historian and literary critic Lewis Mumford to nominate the national flower. “The concrete cloverleaf” he replied glumly. Canada’s own Joni Mitchell put it better: “They paved paradise, put up a parking lot.” Arthur Black Other Views Take this name and chev it Premier Dalton McGuinty has hit a bump in the road in his drive to bring in new laws aimed at protecting people. He now needs to spend a little time protecting himself. The Liberal premier has introduced more programs to protect – sometimes when some did not want them – than any previous premier. This is something he has a right to boast about, but he has never mentioned it, because he worries he will be accused of turning the province into a “nanny state.” McGuinty instead calls himself “the education premier,” implying he has done much to improve education. But that title belongs more to former Progressive Conservative premiers John Robarts and William Davis, who both introduced fundamental innovations as education ministers and premiers. McGuinty’s real trademark has been protecting and the best-known examples include banning smoking almost everywhere indoors except in private homes and effectively banning pit bull terriers. The premier’s most recent safeguards have been introducing laws to prevent drivers using cell phones and require small construction companies to buy insurance to cover injured workers, which some claim will drive them out of business. McGuinty is now looking at, among other measures, imposing stricter curbs on agents who knock on doors trying to sell hydro contracts and operators of tanning beds, which increase the risk of skin cancer. His protection is not always as useful as it sounds. He announced restrictions on payday lenders months ago, but still has not decided on the key statistic of what percentage interest they can charge. But most are worth having. The Liberals also appear to have been motivated mainly by genuinely believing their protective measures were needed. But they also have the merit of being inexpensive. Governments are always looking for programs that make them look busy and cost little and McGuinty particularly, because he started in government by being left a $5 billion deficit by the preceding Conservative government he had not fully expected. Providing a law requiring parents to buy safer car seats for their children costs government almost nothing, while shelling out millions of dollars for daycare may not go a long way. McGuinty’s protectionist policies also mostly have been supported by the opposition parties – it is difficult to vote against banning junk foods in schools – but the Conservatives increasingly have complained he is intent on making Ontario a nanny state. McGuinty has now suffered a rare defeat in his campaign to protect. He brought in legislation to place stronger restrictions on young drivers, after a series of accidents in which teenagers, often riding together and after drinking, were killed. These include tougher penalties for youth than the rest of the population for some traffic offences and political opponents and much of the public accused him of singling out and being harder on young drivers for offences others also commit. The proposed change that caused the most resentment would have limited teenage drivers in the first year of their G2 intermediate licences to carrying only one teenage passenger, except for immediate family, brothers and sisters. Opposition MPPs and others pointed out this would hurt young people particularly in rural areas and the north, where there are fewer public transit services and they have to rely on cars to get to school, sports events and social gatherings. Forcing young drivers to travel separately also would put more cars on the roads and increase traffic accidents, pollution and costs. Suggestions McGuinty was imposing a nanny state were rampant and eventually he backed down and withdrew the proposed limit on carrying passengers. The retreat showed McGuinty is out of touch with people particularly in rural areas and the north and may be giving some residents more protection than they want. But the premier is even harder up for cash for new programs because of the current economic recession and will need to continue bringing in laws that protect – he probably will be in less of a rush. Eric Dowd FFrroomm QQuueeeenn’’ss PPaarrkk So bravely I approached it. Fear, apprehension and dread were not going to break down good common sense. After all, there was nothing could be done to change it, no way stressing would alter it. It is what it is. I’ve survived it sane before and would do so again, I determined. Winter. Here to be weathered it seems. But really, winter wouldn’t be so bad if it wasn’t for one four-letter word. The seemingly insignificant, innocent fluff we call snow is the bane of my existence. I would presume we can blame this early deluge on me. I had, you see, prepared myself quite positively. Time’s swift passage I rationalized meant winter would come and go before I knew it, so just ride along with it. Of course, my game attempt to smile in the face of this wretched season has been sorely tested. We have seen the snowfall arrive, and stay apparently, well in advance of winter’s official start. Yet, I am nothing if not stubborn, so with dogged purpose the other evening, I tried to cast a more favourable eye on snow. It was one of those rare times when silent solitude provided opportunity for leisurely contemplation. I relaxed, and shifted my gaze to the view beyond my window. Soft flakes fell gently, while lights sparkled off the pristine landscape. So okay. It can be a pretty time of year. I’ll give it that. Next I let my mind travel back to childhood, to a time when the winter world I inhabited was truly a wonderland. I was the architect of snowforts, the builder of snowmen, the creator of angels. Neither frozen toes, nor fingers could drive me indoors. No getting around it, it was magical. As a teen, snow brought me snow days. Well, not me exactly as I don’t recall the school ever actually closing back then, and I did live in town. But when a storm blocked the roads during the day, my country friends often enjoyed a holiday in town, meaning impromptu slumber parties on week nights. Snow unquestionably can bring surprises. And then my snowy thoughts brought me to the next stage of my life, and Mark. By the time I met him I was becoming the older and wiser version before you all today. Snow was alright but it had certainly lost the allure it had held when I was too young to know better. Like a trip to the dentist, it was unavoidable, so simply tolerated. But, then I met this guy, and more than he loved anything, at least then, he loved to snowmobile. And with my head in the clouds I eagerly went along for the rides. Snow was fun again then, no question. Eventually, however, babies brightened my world and dimmed my enthusiasm for spending time on the trails. Then they got older, wanted to go along, and as there were four of them, I found myself staying home more and more. Over time, with the magic and fun distant memories and less enthusiasm for unexpected surprises, the pristine prettiness lost its lustre. Snow came to mean nothing better than shovelling and scraping. But I am seeing a bit of a changing trend. With my grandson I am again architect, builder and creator. And this year, I’ve decided to bite the bullet and give those trails a run again. After all, life is what we make of it and it’s up to each of us to find and keep the magic, beauty and fun alive. McGuinty may slow trademark Letters Policy The Citizen welcomes letters to the editor. Letters must be signed and should include a daytime telephone number for the purpose of verification only. Letters that are not signed will not be printed. Submissions may be edited for length, clarity and content, using fair comment as our guideline. 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