Clinton News-Record, 1972-07-13, Page 4How to order Chinese food
My little book titled "How to will defend to the death my right to
Order a Chinese Dinner and Still order it.
Keep Your Friends" is not yet in Yet this individuality is
the hands of the printers, but precisely what makes organizing
perhaps I can give a short preview a meal for a group a perilous
of what it's all about. This will be , undertaking and why I have
the egg rolls before the main written my great humanitarian
course.
The hook will have nothing woOrnice of the most common types
whatever to do with the fact that of Chinatown Menace is the guy
most of us haven't the faintest who craves everything. He opens
idea of how to go about properly a menu with the same sort of
ordering an Oriental meal. anticipation that some of us open a
Of course, it drives the Chinese Raymond Chandler mystery. He
is convinced that he can eat all the right out of their inscrutability to way from Bird's Nest clear to the
see us sitting there with our crazy Boneless Chicken Balls and back
selections. If a man went into an
Occidental resaurant and ordered .ri•.'11 '
.' four different varieties of salad' The Waiter stands there, pencil
they'd be calling for the squirrel- poised,
Experimenter,
aiid his the
eyes bugged catchers. This, in effect, happens
all the time in Chinatown and out like grapes, begins his
explains why the waiters go `recitation: "We'll start with the
running, giggling, to the kitchen. Deep Fried Crunchy-crisp
But who cares? Chinese dishes
are an acquired appetite. One
man's suhgum chow mein is
another man's buckchoy chop
suey. And half the fun is knowing
exactly what you like without any
rational reason whatever.
I am, myself, a lustful lover of
beef-greens -peapod-and-pepper
sprinkled with sesame seeds and
spell of the mystic east.
I was once with just such a type
and we ended up with about 40
gallons of something called Thin
Canton Mushroom Floating Bean
Custard before willing hands
shoved him under the table.
At the other extreme, of
course, you find the One Track
Mind type who scorns everything
except his one favorite dish,
almost always something that
repulses the other guests.
"All of this is for the tourists",
he will likely say, grandly
dismissing 138 suggested dishes
including beef-greens-peapod-
and-pepper. "What we'll have is
the Boiled,W,hole Rockcod stuffed
with green ginger with a minced
garlic-and-bean sauce. This is a
real Chinese dish". (He's happily
eating New York steaks, rare).
Since the Boiled Whole Rockcod
is enough to feed an entire logging
camp a lively argument naturally
ensues, often being resolved the
next morning before a
magistrate.
Almost any large group in a
safari to Chinatown will include
one concientious objector who
permits himself to be dragged
along, but never lets you forget
that he thinks you're mentally
unbalanced. He believes that
birds' nests are only for tlfe
birds.
While you are pursuing the
menu he will bleat to the waiter,
"Could you coddle me an egg?"
When the first steaming
goodies are brought in he will
poke at them distastefully with a
fork and enquire, "Have you any
idea what's in this stuff?" He is
dedicated to the theory that if he
doesn't like it you're not going to
like it, either.
This fellow usually acts as if
Chinatown were one of the
suburbs of Hong Kong and may at
any time break into, a form of
pidgin English. Only last week I
chanced to over-hear one of this
type saying to the waiter. "You
bling-um two howl rice, you
savvy?"
"I savvy," said the waiter, a
kid who is working his way
through university and can take a
joke.
But, as for preserving
harmony, I recommend the One-
Dish-Apiece system under which
each of the participants is entitled
to the delicacy of his choice and
with the privelege of digging into
the others, which is the
democratic way.
Just so long as you keep your
big hands out of my beef-green-
peapod-and-pepper, that is.
Dear Sir:
In my letter published June 29
my "premise" was "Tradition or
Truth?", clearly stated.
However, today I received a copy
of a letter addressed to you from
G.N. Russell beclouding the
issue. Therefore I submit the
following information.
The New Catholic
Encyclopedia, prepared by an
editorial staff at the Catholic
University' of America
(Washington; 1967) says: (today)
"Trinitarian discussion, Roman
Catholic as well as other,
presents a somewhat unsteady
silhouette." Why? It says this is
because of the modern return to
"the primitive sources, chiefly
the Biblical." No doubt to the
great surprise of many of its
readers, it says that there is a
recognition among Biblical
scholars, "including a constantly
growing number of Roman
Catholics, that one should not
speak of Trinitarianism in the
New Testament without serious
qualification."
According to this
Encyclopedia, it was as late as
"the last quadrant of the 4th
century" that the teaching of "one
.God in three Persons became
-thoroughly assimilated into
•Christian life and thought," This
means, of course, that the current
idea about the Trinity was not
explained by Christ to his
apostles, but was added centuries
after his death.
Among Protestants, The New
Bible Dictionary admits: "The
word Trinity is not found in the
Bible, and, though used by
Tertullian in the last decade of the
2nd'century, it did not find a place
formally in the theology of the
Church till the 4th century."
Thus, these persons who teach
the doctrine of the Trinity are
forced to admit that it is not found
in the Bible.
C.F. Barney
Clinton.
Wuntun, sweet and
sour...hmmmm....the Shredded
Wormein-egg Noodles with
Bamboo Shoots hmmmm
Dragon's Eye Fruit with
Preserved Lichi Nuts ..."
At this point the man must be
forcibly restrained by clearer
heads who are able to recognize
that he has run amok under the
Letter sm.,
to the
Editor
Dear Editor:
What activities do the Clinton
parents wish for their children?
One often hears the following
words. 'There is nothing to do in
Clinton!'
This summer Clinton has a
recreational co-ordinator who
has tried to organize events for
the young people. These events
have been varied but the response
has been discouraging from the
children and parents.
My prirpe concern is the
organized playground. Thought
has been put into this event yet by
the second day of registration
less than ten children had
registered.
Why? Do the children not wish
to attehADo the parents not wish
this kind of activity for their
children? Is the fee prohibitive?
Do parents wish this service to be
provided free to all children and
sponsored by the town?
Please parents, let's get
something going for
*
our kids.
Concerned.
Polly Powell, Clinton
"That Croft's got his nerve — he knows it's my turn to be away with the flu!"
This is the year of his poetry
hat's new at Huronview?
•••••••;*
DON'T
BURN
CANADA'S
FORESTS!
THE CLINTON fJEW ERA Amalgamated THE HURON NEWS-RECORD
Established 1865 1924 Established 1 881
Clinton News-Record
•
A member of the Canadian Weekly Newspaper Association,
Ontario Weekly Newspaper Association and the Audit Bureau
of Circulation (ABC)
second class mail
registration number 0817
'SUBSCRIPTION RATES: (in advance)
'Canada, $8.00 per year; U,S.A., $9.50
JAMES E. FITZGERALD—Editor
J, HOWARD AITKEN — General Manager
Published every Thursday at
the heart of Huron County'
Clinton, Ontario
Population 3,475
THE HOME
OF RADAR
IN CANADA
4—Clinton News-Record, Thursday, July 13, 1972
A welcome addition
The Open House at the new Wi I-Dex
plant on George Street yesterday
means more to Clinton than many
people care to believe. Not only does it
mean an infusion of money into the
'economy of CI inton but
psychologically, it's a termendous
boost.
The plant has only been open a few
months and already they are a year
and a half ahead of schedule. During
the first year the plant was supposed
to employ only 12 people but already,
there are 20 working there and the
plant is looking for more help.
What's really important, though, is
the fact that all the people are local
People who would otherwise not have
jobs or would have to move to one of
the big cities to find employment.
It's no secret that Huron County was
Poor jounalism
Some residents have expressed
concern lately thatClinton's image is
being ruined by the frequent bad press
it gets from the big dai I ies. They point
to the fact that everytime something
bad happens around Clinton the big
dai I ies blow it al I out of proportion and
stick big screaming headlines on top
of it.
They also say that when something
good happens it is either totally
ignored or given small space on the
"local front" of the dailies and never
makes any of the other editions.
Well, we agree. They're just about
100 per cent right.
The axiom in the big daily
newspapers still seems to be "no
news is good news" or translated
"good news is no news".
A glance at the other editions of one
particular daily would leave a person
A MDC winner
Midwestern Development Council
has a winner on its hands. It is the
unusual slide showing which
comprises its presentation to the
federal committee on transportation
and it concerns itself with travel in the
four-county area it serves- Waterloo,
Wellington, Perth and,Huron.
With three screens, a triple set of
slidesflashingatcolorful intervals on
them, and accompanying sounds
effects and music, the viewer is taken
on a bird's-eye tour of the MDC
district. And the presentation comes
across tel I ing the'story of this part of
Canada where it is as easy to put a man
on the moon as it is to make bus'
connections between Goderich and
Wingham.
But more than that, the presentation
tells a story of the MDC area, its
people, its economy, its past, its
future. It focuses attention on its
the only county in the province to lose
population in the last five years and by
attracting new industry, Huron County
and Clinton will not only start growing
again but will be able to keep their
sons and daughters at home.
Luring new industry like Wil-Desx
into the area is a significant moral
booster as well. The closing of the
Armed Forces base meant
uncalculated losses in income for
businesses and trades in the area.
Clinton managed to hold together wel I
but without some industrial base, she
eventually would have shrivelled up
and died.
As the farm economic,units become
larger, there are fewer farmers and
hence fewer purchases. Dependency
on the rural community alone would
mean sure death.
with the impression that the town of
CI inton was fal ling apart at the seams,
and is under mob rule.
A perfect example is illustrated by
the London Free Press. In the last
week or so, the only stories about
Clinton that made all the other
editions of that paper were stories
concerning violence against CI inton's
police, an erroneous story on a
pending law suit against Rodoma
Investments who are developing the
old armed forces base and the banning
by the Huron county board of education
of a book on the Truscott affair.
Os time the citizens of Clinton area
let the Free Press know where they
stand. It seems funny that the Free
Press, which has a high circulation
locally, could sell papers because of
their local coverage and then turn
around and smear our name behind
our backs
potential for growth here and it plants
a powerful suggestion for continued
progress in the future.
It isn't surprising that when the
committee viewed the presentation
recently, MDC executive members
were invited to take it to Ottawa where
it could be viewed by more of the
country's policy makers.
. The presentation is one of the most
tangible accomplishments that MDC
has been able to show the people of
Huron. If the quality of that
presentation is any indication of the
worth of MDC, it could be that MDC is
far more valuable than anyone thought
possible.
In any case, it is evident that
Huron's membership in MDC for 1972
is now justified and this county has its
money's worth for the first six months
of the year at least.
— from Goderich Signal-Star
Don't hold your breath waiting
for its publication, but this is the
summer I'm going to write a hook.
It's the tenth summer in a row
that I've been going to write a
hook, but this year will he
different. It's the year in which
I'm not going to write a novel.
Other summers I didn't get
around to writing a play, or an
expose of the educational system,
or a series of pungent essays, or
an attack on marriage. This year
it's the novel.
That doesn't leave too much,
does it? Maybe I'll write a "slim"
volume of verse. Any dam' fool
can write poetry these days.
The secret is to avoid capital
letters and punctuation, make
your lines all different lengths,
toss in a little erotic imagery, and
make the end result a visceral
experience which nobody
understands.
Here, just to show you what I
mean. If you don't get a real
charge out of it, a profound
emotional experience, that is, and
haven't a clue what it's about,
you're a connoisseur of modern
poetry, Oh, one other thing: no
rhyme please. We'll just call it
Poem
yesterday
in the supermarket
a fat lady
or maybe she wasn't really
a lady
ran over my foot
not really ran but walked
I guess it was her buggy
laden with a quarter-ton of
eat food and orange juice
and tide and glide and
waX and snacks
and four cases of non-
returnable bottles
and twelve pounds of
pallid meat
two bags of spuds
16 cans of chunky
soup
that ran over my foot (not
the soup)
driving my seed wart into
my
metatarsal
I wept
not because it hurt like hell
but for lovable fat ladies
and unlovable super-
markets
and because I couldn't
do
a
• thing.
Now, don't tell me that's not a
poem. It was a vivid personal
experience which I attempted to
convey to the reader. It's got
everything. There's sex in it: a
secret yearn for fat ladies; the
word metatarsal. There's plenty
of concrete images. There's
symbolism: How about seed wart?
a fertility symbol if I ever saw
one. There's masochism, social
criticism and a deep personal
sense of futility and frustration,
It's what I would call universal in
its appeal.
They won't all he so deep and
hitter, of course. There'll he the
hearty bucolic touch:
The garden ain't hoed
The lawn ain't mowed
But. he Mowed
If she's going to goad
Me into doing any of
them.
Th'en there'll he the fragile,
tender little lyric that makes real
poetry lovers just wriggle and
almost turn themselves inside
out. Something like:
love
myself
more
than
anyone but you
sorry baby
but maybe
it's not even true.
Sorry about that rhyme, but
sometimes it just comes so•
automatic-like you can't hold it
back,
And of course there'll be some
dramatic narrative stuff. I'm
working on a sort of epic called
The Day I Shot the Black Squirrel
Thinking It was a Black Bear. But
it still needs a little polishing in
the last twelve cantos.
Maybe you think this is just
advance publicity for my book,
But I guarantee there'll be
something for everyone, though
some of it will be pretty strong
stuff, and you may have to hide it
from your teenage kids. I was
thinking particularly of a couple:
Down By the Old Gravel Pit, and
Let Me Call You Meathead.
But there's also some stuff
'coming up that is really haunting.
One is entitled simply "Puke". It
is based on a great storm on the
Great Lakes when I, as junior
porter, did great things with a
mop after people were sea-sick.
It's been haunting me ever since,
anyway,
So, there's a delectable
foretaste Of my summer project, I
can hardly wait to get started,
Except that I have a golf date, then
I'm going swimming, then there's
a barbecue, and somehow after a
day like that, the Muse and I are
both ready for the sack.
10 YEARS AGO
THURSDAY, JULY 12, 1962
Clinton Town Council decided
Monday to adhere closely to the
trailer by-law and request the
Lavern Asmussen Co., to remove
the house trailer which has been
placed at the site of the new
vocational School wing at GDCI.
A letter read at council
meeting reported that the trailer
housed a watchman, Who was also
foreman on the job, and his wife,
who is acting as his secretary,
and requested permission for
them to remain there.
xxx
Fire early last Thursday
morning caused an estimated
$30,000 to $35,000 damage to the
locker storage plant on King St.
About 400 lockers and some
contents were seriously damaged
by smoke, fire and water.
xxx
15 YEARS AGO
THURSDAY, JULY 11, 1957
Thieves gained entrance to the
home of Mrs. Alice Joynt, Main
Street, Hensall during the early
hours of July 6. They cut the
telephone wires and carried away
a safe containing valuable papers
and considerable money,
xxx
Men on the sloop "Betty J"
sighted on Lake Huron off
Hayfield on Tuesday were
rescued early yesterday morning
by Henry Green, Grand Bend, who
came out to them in his fishing
tug. Brisk gusts of wind on
Tuesday afternoon blew the sloop
off course, and when the tiller
cracked, the men had tried to keep
close to shore and make it down to
Grand Bend. On the boat were
Alfred Searle, Stratford and John
IvIeGugan, London as well as two
Provincial Park men.
25 YEARS AGO
THURSDAY, JULY 10, 1947
Ten farmers from Western
Canada arrived to help with the
harvest. Another 125 applications
for help are still on file.
xxx
Phyllis Evelyn Middleton and
Lorne, Keith Tyndall were
married in St. James Church,
Middleton on July 5 by the Rector,
the Rev. Laverne Morgan.
xxx
Winners of the races at the
S.S.10 picnic (Stanley Township)
included: eight or under, Murray
Hill, Ken Caldwell; twelve and
under, John Moffat, Wilmer
Johnston,
40 YEARS AGO
THURSDAY, JULY 14, 1932
Meetings of the Liberals,
Liberal- (louse rya! ives , and
Progressives, were planned to
select candidates in the by-
election to replace the late
Thomas McMillan, M,P.
xxx
Violet, Freinlin, daughter of
Mr. and Mrs, A, E. Fremlin,
stood high in the entrance class in
Clinton with 685 out of a possible
750 marks.
xxx
Irwin's were selling dresses
listed at $1.50 marked down to 98c
(flowered linen).
xxx
The Rev. F. M. Paull preached
for the L.O,L, church service in
St. John's Church, .Varna, on
Sunday.
55 YEARS AGO
THURSDAY, JULY 12, '1917
Robert Matheson, who was
publisher of the Clinton New-Era
from 1869 to 1872, celebrated his
82nd birthday at his home in
Toronto on June 30.
xxx
Murphy L.O.L. attended church
service at Ontario Street United
Church, Rev, J, A, Agnew gave the
address.
xxx
The Rev, E. G. Powell, Huron
Court Inspector for the
enforcement of liquor laws, made
a seizure of liquor last week at
Exeter, and put it inside his grip.
While stopping at another
residence, some thirsty soul
retrieved the wet goods.
Fourteen residents from
Huronview along with eighty
senior citizens from Goderich
attended the Octogenarian Club
Picnic on Wednesday afternoon.
The Picnic was held in the
Anglican Church parish hall and
is sponsored by the Goderich
Kinsmen Club. The afternoon's
activities included a musical
program by several individuals
and the Goderich Psychiatric
Rythm Band led by Gordon
Harrison. Following the
luncheon, each member was
presented with a gift.
A great deal of credit is due to
the Goderich Kinsmen for this
very worthwhile social service
work,
As a result of the' cancellation
of the Band Concert by the Clinton
Legion Band, the Family Night
program was held in the
auditorium, The variety program
featuring the Henderson Family
was a real treat for everyone with
vocal solos, duets, trios, quartets
and dance numbers by Donna,
Darlene, Debbie and Diane.
Norman Speir and Jerry
Collins accompanied by Mrs.
Henderson added to the evening's
enjoyment with several musical
numbers. Mrs. Orville Dale
thanked the entertainers on behalf
of the residents.
Opinions
In 'order tnat
News—Record readers might
express their opinions on any
topic of public interest,
Letters To The Editor are
always welcome for
publication.
But the writers of such
letters, as well as all readers,
are reminded that the
opinions expressed in letters
published are not necessarily
the opinions held by The
News7Record.