HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2010-08-26, Page 5THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, AUGUST 26, 2010. PAGE 5.
Ever heard of The Celebrated Jumping
Frog of Calaveras County? It’s the title
of the story that made Mark Twain
famous. America’s Dean of Humour wrote it
for a weekly paper in 1865 when he was a 30-
year-old HumHHHitinerant bumming his way
around the American west. It’s a tall tale about
an inveterate gambler who’d lay a wager on
anything. One day he bets a stranger that his
pet frog can jump higher than the stranger’s
can. The gambler loses the bet – even though
his frog is known as a champion jumper. Why?
Because when he wasn’t looking, the stranger
poured a quarter pound of lead buckshot down
the champion frog’s throat.
Lucky for Twain, he wrote that story nearly
a century and a half ago. If he published it
today he’d be famous all over again, but for all
the wrong reasons. He’d be outed on
Facebook as a callous enabler and slammed by
PETA for cruelty to animals.
When it comes to the interaction of people
and animals times have changed, as the people
of Ailsa Craig could tell you. Although it
sounds like the name of an Advice to the
Lovelorn columnist, Ailsa Craig is a sleepy
little village not far from London, Ontario.
Each year at their summer festival Ailsa
Craigians sponsor a turtle race. They’ve been
doing it for over 30 years. Kids go out and
find painted turtles, which, in season, roam
freely all over town, take them home and
‘train’ them (it’s like herding tomcats) then
enter them in the one day, once-a-year ‘race’at
the summer fair. The turtles straggle toward
the finish line, a winner is declared then all the
turtles are plopped back in the river.
“These turtle races are a tradition,” says
Laurie Rees, one of the event organizers, “a
way for families to get together.”
Well, not any more they aren’t. This year the
Ministry of Natural Resources informed
festival organizers that they were breaking the
law. It is illegal to hunt or harbour any wild
turtle in Ontario. Draconian? Perhaps not. We
humans have grown accustomed to treating the
other inhabitants of this orb with a kind of
arrogant contempt. We throw baited hooks in
the water, blow ducks out of the air, put
canaries in cages, blast away at deer and elk
and moose and bear and don’t think a whole
lot about the morality of it all. I remember
seeing some kids in a local park tossing a
small grass snake back and forth. I told them
to stop. Their mother huffed up, looked at me
like I was some kind of sentimental fool and
hissed “It’s only a snake!”
Which brings us to the Calgary Stampede.
Call me unpatriotic, but I don’t get off on this
annual spectacle either. Oh, I have no problem
with a celebration that encourages city geeks
to wear goofy hats, talk like Yosemite Sam and
dress up like extras from the Village People,
but the animal toll is getting hard to ignore.
This year, six horses died. Two had heart
attacks, one broke its back during a bucking
event, two were so badly injured they had to be
euthanized. Last year the death count was
three horses and a steer, which suffered a
spinal cord injury during a roping competition.
Let’s see now: you cattle prod a terrified
steer into galloping across a corral, throw a
lasso around its neck and yank it to a standstill.
Gee, how could anything go wrong?
So-called ‘broncos’ and Brahma bulls are
encouraged to buck by means of what are
euphemistically called ‘flank’ straps, cinched
about their guts. Apologists claim the straps
don’t bother the beasts, but it’s amazing how
placid they become as soon as the straps are
loosened. Call me a gay vegetarian
metrosexual Commie, but the whole animal-
teasing premise doesn’t seem all that far
removed from bull-baiting, a 19th century
English ‘sport’ in which packs of dogs were
turned loose to tear at a tethered bull and much
merriment was had by all. Not counting the
bull.
Times change. About the time this year’s
Stampede was winding down, the Spanish
region of Catalonia was making history by
outlawing bullfighting, an Iberian tradition
that dates back to at least the time of the
Romans.
Which will mean a menu change in some
Spanish restaurants I suppose. I heard a story
of one American tourist who, while ordering a
meal at a plush Madrid restaurant, noticed a
nearby diner being served a magnificently
garnished dish with two giant meatballs in the
center. He asked his waiter what it was.
”Cojones de toro, senor,” he was told. Bulls’
testicles, fresh from the local bullfighting
arena and available only after a bullfight. The
tourist tries to order, but is told only one dish
per bullfight is available. He will have to wait
until the following day. The next day he
arrives at the restaurant, sits down, knife and
fork at the ready. The specialty dish is placed
before him, but this time he notices the
meatballs are tiny, almost miniscule. He
complains to the waiter, who shrugs and says,
“Senor, you have to understand…sometimes
the bull wins.”
Arthur
Black
Other Views Th-th-th-that’s ball, folks!
What a difference a few years can
make indeed. Just under four years
ago I was sent out to a Huron East
Council meeting on my second day as a paid
journalist. I didn’t know what to write, I didn’t
know the issues and I didn’t know the players.
Around that time, I was asked to write a
column for the first incarnation of Shawn’s
Sense. Because of space requirements not
knowing where exactly we would stick it, (the
first) Shawn’s Sense only lasted for two weeks.
In my first chance to express my opinion in a
column, I discussed council meetings, what
they meant to me and my views on politics
before and after becoming a part of The
Citizen.
In addition to being 24 years old, many other
things from that column have changed as well.
I had no interest in politics before taking a
position at The Citizen and found the world of
rural politics to be fascinating. It’s a world
where decisions are made and the public is
consulted and a world where politicians’home
phone numbers are listed on the municipality’s
website.
In this same spirit, I remember being struck
at how forthcoming most councillors were.
Their willingness to speak frankly and speak
their minds was not what I was expecting.
I go back to something told to me during my
last days with Rogers, something that I
mentioned in that first column, which was a
local politician in Pickering telling me to never
trust a politician. He told me that all politicians
are dirty and that they would always be nice to
me because they need me (the media).
The man told me to always dig deeper. And
while I’m sure there are plenty of storylines
that may never see the light of day, over the
years I have found that many area councillors
wear their hearts on their sleeves, put in scores
of hours of unpaid time and truly care about
their community and the people within it
and not just about retaining the territory
politically.
In that first column, I stated that as time went
on, the issues took a backseat and it was the
people who were the real story, what they did
and how they ran the municipality. On that, I
was right.
As time has gone on, I have seen numerous
councillors commit countless hours to various
battles, including the Accommodation Review
process despite owning their own businesses,
having rough waters on the homefront and
despite taking on a seemingly-undefeatable
opponent in the school board.
While some battles may be lost along the
way, it is instances like these that make me
think we are winning the war, because we have
politicians who care about us fighting for our
best interests.
I have found over the years that some
councillors’ best work is done when galleries
are empty and this comes from a true
commitment to their friends and neighbours,
not the idea that the election is the shortest
distance to a term of free lunches.
So as this fall’s election approaches, I’m
reminded of my first few months with The
Citizen, covering all-candidates meetings and
remembering how confusing and intimidating
it all seemed to me as a brand new reporter
who was just trying to keep up.
As time has passed and I have now covered
my first full term as a reporter, I’ve watched
veteran politicians decide to hang up their
gloves, I’ve watched new politicians learn the
ropes and gain confidence and we’ve even lost
some councillors along the way.
What a difference a few years can make.
McGuinty trips on marital arts
What a difference...
Premier Dalton McGuinty has changed
his mind and will allow an alleged
“sport” calling itself professional mixed
martial arts (MMA) to be staged in Ontario,
but it is doubtful he knows quite what he is
getting into.
The Liberal premier said only six months
ago he had no interest in the province
legalizing such contests, which consist mainly
of muscular young men kicking opponents in
the face and punching, kneeing or choking
them until they submit or the referee
intervenes.
He has reversed himself mainly because it
will bring his government money to help it
through economically difficult times.
McGuinty also has been subjected to
intense, adroit lobbying by the
multimillionaire owners of the so-called sport
and their highly paid lobbyists, who never get
close enough to the brawling to collect a
splash of blood on their expensive suits, but sit
back counting the money.
MMA is now permitted in many
jurisdictions in the United States and Canada
and large audiences can see and sadly enjoy it
on Pay-Per-View TV in Ontario.
Allowing bouts in arenas here will increase
its live audiences and boost the profits of
hotels, restaurants, bars and stores where it is
held and the province will collect more tax, so
there is a lot of money in it for McGuinty.
The premier said in February allowing
mixed martial arts in Ontario is not a priority
for him, which should have cooled off most
advocates from pressing further.
But they persisted and pushed their case
steadily, low-key and without rancour. They
hired the biggest arena in Toronto to tell news
media their athletes are wholesome and
virtually boy scouts.
The lobbyists managed to get lengthy
articles in all four of this city’s major daily
newspapers that encouraged the advocates of
mixed martial arts, while not actually
endorsing legalizing it.
The Toronto Star, which editorially opposes
legalizing MMA, published a news story
saying a study by a university in the United
States found 40 per cent of its bouts ended
with injuries, but most were minor.
The Globe and Mail said “No-one has died
in the UFC (Ultimate Fighting Championship,
the dominant organization in the sport.)
Fighters can honourably surrender by tapping
out rather than being beaten into unconscious.”
Another Globe article suggested Ontarians
should be allowed to watch “grown men
kicking, punching and wrestling and generally
beating the crap out of each other,” if they
want to.
Toronto Sun writers have argued permitting
MMA would create jobs and pump money into
the economy and one declared he is proud to
be a supporter of MMA and his paper has
become one of its official sponsors.
The National Post managed to find a
member of one of Canada’s richest families,
the Bronfmans, who is so enamoured of mixed
martial arts she has built a gym for it in her 10-
bedroom mansion.
Newspapers here have been exceptionally
charitable to MMA, reporting its organizers’
claim there never has been a death in it, but
this writer’s research found two fighters have
died of injuries in contests staged by MMA-
type organizations in recent years.
Two of the best-known fighters in UFC
history clashed in Vancouver recently and the
winner Rich Franklin broke his left arm and
the loser Chuck Liddell lay motionless for
several minutes before being carried to
hospital.
In another, heavyweight champion Brock
Lesnar was reported by news media as having
“turned opponent Frank Mir’s face to mush
with nasty ground-and-pound” and added an
insult about having sex with his opponent’s
wife.
Mir was reported as saying he wanted to
break Lesnar’s neck in their next fight.
Another UFC fighter, Chael Sonnen,
boasted he could “drag Anderson Silva (his
next opponent) outside the hotel and beat him
up any time I want.” These sound the type of
people the premier may want to take home to
mother.
Eric
Dowd
FFrroomm
QQuueeeenn’’ss PPaarrkk
Shawn
Loughlin
SShhaawwnn’’ss SSeennssee
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