The Citizen, 2010-03-11, Page 16One minute past the stroke of
midnight March 1, butts were put
out, pipe bowls turned cold and
tobacco juices dried up all over
Huron County.
The lights of hope and
determination were turned on for
249 residents of Huron County who
decided to quit tobacco and enter the
2010 Driven to Quit Challenge.
Public Health Nurse Carolyn
Grice says the days of planning are
over for those 249 people and it’s
their time for action. “Quitting
smoking is hard. They’ll need lists
of coping strategies and diversion
tactics that can work for them. They
should also have on hand a kit filled
with gum, healthy snacks, water,
and any help aids suggested by a
health care provider to help control
nicotine cravings and withdrawal
symptoms.”
The number of Huron County
residents who signed up to quit
tobacco this year has doubled from
last year. Grice says it’s important
for friends, family and buddies to
give cheers of encouragement and
support along the way. There is also
a Smokers’ Helpline 1-877-513-
5333 number and website:
www.smokershelpline.ca. It gives
free personalized advice,
counselling and a quit plan that is
individualized. Grice says, “The
road ahead may look long and
bumpy, but you can do it. You will
succeed!”
About half of all Canadians who
ever smoked have already stopped
successfully. Some make it on their
first try; others are successful after
several quit attempts.
March 31 is the final day of the
2010 Driven to Quit Challenge. The
Challenge is a health promotion
campaign hosted by the Canadian
Cancer Society Ontario Division,
with funding from the Ontario
Ministry of Health Promotion and
generous prize support from McNeil
Consumer Healthcare, a wholly
owned subsidiary of Johnson &
Johnson Inc.
Winners will be randomly
selected on March 31 and will be
announced publicly and listed on the
DriventoQuit.ca website April 19.
By Pastor Ernest DowLiving Water ChristianFellowship (EMC), Blyth
The popular 1970 romantic movie
Love Story featured the tagline,
“Love means never having to say
you’re sorry.” In fact, this ranks 13th
in the top 100 all-time memorable
movie quotes in the American Film
Institute’s “AFI 100 Years... 100
Movie Quotes” list. Too bad it’s just
not true!
“To err is human...” is actually a
more accurate description of our
reality as fallen, mistake-prone,
over-committing individuals. For
any relationship to endure over time
requires humility and creativity in
saying “I’m sorry” in a way that
comes across as genuine and heart-
felt to the person who’s been
disappointed.
Recently my wife and I attended a
“Focus on Marriage” simulcast
conference which featured various
speakers, including Dr. Gary
Chapman, author of “The Five Love
Languages”. Dr. Chapman
commented that sometimes a wife
or husband might not feel as if their
spouse had apologized, even though
the spouse thought they had said
they were sorry. We need to learn toapologize in the other person’s“apology language” if we want our
words to really register with them.
Dr. Chapman outlined five
“languages of apology”.
The first such language involves
expressive regret. This is emotional
and typically includes the words
“I’m sorry.” Always include what
you’re sorry for, and never tack on a
‘but’ clause (which may sound like
you’re blaming the other person).
For example, the prodigal son
sincerely told his father, “I am no
longer worthy to be called your
son.” (Luke 15:21)
A second way is that of accepting
responsibility. Here we don’t try to
make excuses; instead we say, “I
was wrong. I shouldn’t have done
that”. We own our part in the
problem. The prodigal son accepted
responsibility when he said, “I have
sinned against heaven and against
you”.
A third approach is offering to
make restitution. We offer to make
things right: “Honey, what can I do
to make this up to you?” Zacchaeus
the tax collector responded to Jesus’
salvation by promising, “...if I have
cheated anybody out of anything, Iwill pay back four times theamount.” (Luke 19:8) He was
serious about making reparation for
his wrongs.
The fourth apology language is
genuinely repenting. This could be
evidenced by signing up for an
anger management course or joining
an AA group if needed. These are
signs of real heart-change that say,
“I don’t want this to keep
happening. I’m determined to take
steps to make it stop”. In the movie
Fireproof, the pornography-addicted
husband takes the radical step of
trashing his computer!
Jesus started His public ministry
by preaching that repentance was
necessary for people to experience
the Kingdom of heaven. Peter called
people to repent when the Holy
Spirit came at Pentecost. (Matthew
4:17; Acts 2:38) Repentance is a
definite, marked internal turn-around
that shows observable results.
The fifth way involves requesting
forgiveness with words such as,
“Will you forgive me?” As a guy, I
personally find this challenging, as
it requires a degree of humility and
submissiveness! We’re really laying
ourselves open in need of the otherperson’s mercy and grace. ThePsalmist prayed, “...blot out my
transgressions. Wash away all my
iniquity and cleanse me from my
sin.” (Ps 51:1-2)
When we apologize in such a way
that the other person “hears” it –
when we communicate that we’re
sorry in their particular “apology
language” – the grace we receive in
return can be freeing, and even
strengthen the relationship.
Kevin Costner’s acting career was
launched by the movie Silverado.
But first he had to weather a huge
disappointment, following an
apology by the director in a previous
film. After completing his role in
The Big Chill, Costner was called to
a meeting with Lawrence Kasdan,
the film’s director. Kasdan explains:
“I told Kevin that I felt terrible about
it, but I had to cut out the ending and
his part was gone. To my
amazement, Costner was totally
cheerful, sanguine, delightful.
‘Larry,’ he said, ‘this has been the
experience of my life. It has shown
me what kind of actor I want to be,
and I wouldn’t trade it for anything.
You have nothing to apologize for –
you have given me a great gift.’”Kasdan remarks, “It was at thatmoment that our friendship started. I
was already planning Silverado,and
suddenly I thought, I'm going to
write a part for Kevin Costner in
that”.
So, apologies can be good things –
and even lead to better relationships.
In closing his portion of the
simulcast, Dr. Gary Chapman
reminded us that we don’t have to be
perfect to have a good marriage, but
we do have to deal effectively with
failure. Learning our spouse’s or
friend’s “apology language” can
help greatly with that!
PAGE 16. THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, MARCH 11, 2010.From the Minister’s StudyLove means you do have to say sorry
REV. DAVID WOOD
119 John’s Ave.,Auburn
519-526-1131
www.huronchapel.org
9:30 a.m.
Sunday School & Small Groups
10:30 a.m.
Morning Worship Service
March Break
Safari Adventure
Come dressed as a Safari
guide, tourist or animal!
Games,
crafts, food,
devotions, music
and much more
for Kids in JK-Grade 6
Wednesday, March 17th
1:00 - 4:30 pm
YOU ARE WELCOME
9:45 a.m. Sunday School for all ages
10:30 a.m. - Sunday Morning Worship
Mid-week Bible Study
C H U R C H O F G O D ,ANDERS
O
N
,
I
N
D
I
A
N
A
Timeless Truths
For Today
308 Blyth Rd. E., Blyth
Pastor Les Cook ~ 519-523-4590
Blyth Community Church of God
getlivingwater.org
Pastor: Ernest Dow ~ 519-523-4848
Living Water
Christian Fellowship
10:30 a.m. ~ Worship & Sunday School
at Blyth Public School,
corner of King & Mill
Tuesdays 7:30 pm - Wingham Bible Study
1st & 3rd Wednesdays 7:30 pm - Women at the Well
Fridays 7:30 pm - Youth Group
Christ-centred, Bible-believing,
Fellowship-friendly, Growth-geared
March 14: Luke 4:1-13
“I am Learning to be
like Jesus in my
Attitudes,
Behaviours, Character”
Sevenfold Way of
Following Jesus,
Part 3
Youre Invited
to come worship
with us
Sunday, March 14
Brussels Public School
at 10:30 a.m. and 6:30 p.m.
Sunday School for children
4 to 11 years of age (mornings only)
Childcare provided for infants and toddlers
Coffee & cookies after the morning service
For additional details please contact:
Steve Klumpenhower 519.887.8651 Rick Packer 519.527.0173
Chris McMichael 519.482.1644
BRUSSELS - ETHEL PASTORAL CHARGE
UNITED CHURCH OF CANADA
Sandra Cable, Worship Leader
Church Office 519-887-6259 E-mail - bepc@wightman.ca
Sunday, March 14
Ethel United Church
Worship Service and Sunday School - 9:30 a.m.
Brussels United Church
Worship Service and Sunday School - 11:00 a.m.
Celebrating our Christian Faith together in worship
Please join us for worship
SUNDAYS
Morning Service 10:00am
Evening Service 7:30pm
BLYTH CHRISTIAN
REFORMED CHURCH
Pastor John Kuperus
Hwy. 4, Blyth
No evening service this week.
All are invited to a Concert in the Vanastra CRC at 7:00 pm
Corner of Dinsley & Mill Street
Blyth United Church
Office: 519-523-4224 Rev. Gary Clark
All Welcome
Sunday, March 14
Worship Service & Sunday School at 11 a.m.
2nd Annual Mini Golf
March 17, 18 & 19
2 ~ 4 pm
MELVILLE
PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH
BRUSSELS
SUNDAY, MARCH 14
Wheelchair accessible ~ Nursery care available
519-887-2664
11:00 am - Sunday Morning Worship
- Sunday School
THE ANGLICAN CHURCH OF CANADA
Welcomes you to come
and worship with us
Trinity, Blyth
9:15 a.m.
519-523-9595
St. John's, Brussels
11:15 a.m.
519-887-6862
Sunday, March 14
More than 200 smokers snuff out the flame in Huron