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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2012-08-30, Page 5THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, AUGUST 30, 2012. PAGE 5. So here’s Adaisha Miller, a vivacious, law-abiding 24-year-old woman, lying on the patio by the barbecue, bleeding out from a massive bullet wound in her chest. Who shot her? Well, a cop…sort of. But she kind of shot herself, too. See, Adaisha was a guest at a neighbourhood fish fry at the home of the cop (an off-duty officer). The shooting occurred when she, the cop and several others were dancing to recorded music. Adaisha, who was behind the cop, touched – touched – the holstered automatic the policeman was wearing on his belt. The holster leather was so soft that the gun it held discharged from Adaisha merely brushing the holster with her fingers. The question you’re probably asking yourself is ‘Why is anybody – even an off-duty police officer – wearing a holstered, cocked semi-automatic handgun at his own party? You only ask that question because you’re Canadian. This homicide didn’t happen in Canada; it happened in Detroit. Detroit is an American city. And when it comes to handguns, America is crazy. Consider the National Republican Conven- tion which will unfold in all its multiple weirdnesses at the end of the month in Tampa. Naturally, personal security of everyone attending is a major concern for officials. That’s why glass bottles and any kind of sticks or poles have been pre-emptively banned. Even little kids carrying squirt guns will be asked to check their playthings at the door. But concealed, loaded handguns? No problem. Bring ’em on in. According to Florida Governor Rick Scott, banning handguns from a convention in downtown Tampa, “would surely violate the Second Amendment.” The state of Florida is particularly loony on the subject of gun control. They should switch their motto from The Sunshine State to the Moonshine State. Legislators must have been glassy-eyed drunk to pass a law that banned state doctors from even discussing firearms with their patients. That law was recently overturned by a federal court, but the infamous ‘Stand Your Ground’ law – the one that allowed self-appointed neighbourhood watchman George Zimmerman to gun down an unarmed 17-year-old kid – that one’s still on the books. It’s not just Florida. Martin Luther King was shot in Tennessee; Bobby Kennedy was blown away in California – both in 1968. Since then, more than one million – that’s right 1,000,000 – Americans have been killed by guns. Last year alone, more than 30,000 Americans lost their lives to bullets. Those statistics would flabbergast the countrymen of any democratic state – hell, they’d raise the eyebrows of an African warlord – but Americans are blind on the subject of guns. Or blinkered, thanks to the consummately evil machinations of the National Rifle Association whose lobbyists, year after year and administration after administration, see to it that the right pockets are padded and votes bought to ensure that, well, for instance, every American has the right to own, carry and discharge an M-16 or AK-47 assault rifle. The AK-47 can fire 775 rounds a minute; the M-16 can fire 940 rounds a minute. Neither weapon would be effective for rabbit or grouse hunting – or indeed any hunting at all. But in the field of battle they can lay down a wall of lead that would give the enemy pause. That’s all they were ever intended for. But each weekend, at gun shows from Okefenokee to Oregon, AK-47’s, M-16’s and a Satanic smorgasbord of other absurdly overpowered lethal weapons are snapped up by conspiracy theorists, ubernationalists, neo- Nazis, anti-Semites, KKK cultists and other assorted right and left wing fruitcakes. “Guns don’t kill people; people kill people” goes the moronic mantra of American gun nutters. Tell it to Adaisha Miller. Arthur Black Other Views Gun Control, the American way There is an old way of thinking, whether it’s Aboriginals, Native Americans, the Mayans or the Aborigines of Australia, that a photograph steals part of your soul. At Fan Expo Canada last weekend, there was a resurgence of this thought process, and if you were going to steal some soul, you were going to pay for it. I have a few friends who made their way to the weekend-long event in Toronto and who have gone in the past, but this was the first time that I was tipped off to autograph and photo-op fees. Talking to a friend of mine, she informed me that she was planning on having her picture taken with one of the actors from one of her favourite TV shows, The Walking Dead. She said she was even more excited because he was “only charging $30”. After pulling myself up off the ground, I was directed to the event’s website where I found that nearly everyone there charged fans for the right to stand next to them while a camera flashed on and off. Do you know who Jamie Bamber is? Neither do I. Apparently he stars in the TV series Battlestar Galactica. A picture with him will run you $40. Julie Benz from Angel? $40 once again. Amanda Tapping of Stargate SG-1? $50. That same $50 will get you a picture with James Marsters of Buffy: The Vampire Slayer. Kate Mulgrew from Star Trek is $50. Christopher Lloyd from Back To The Future is $50, or $75 with the film’s iconic DeLorean time machine. LeVar Burton from Star Trek will run you $40, while creator of such characters as Spider-Man and The Incredible Hulk will run as much as $60. Speaking of the Incredible Hulk, he was there too. Lou Ferrigno cost $40; and the list goes on. I have been told that some of these people charge as much as $100 for the privilege of taking a picture with them. Coming from a sports background, this is just something I have a hard time wrapping my head around. When I was a kid. You went to a baseball game early to watch batting practice. There was a slight chance that you might catch a batting practice home run if you positioned yourself correctly and then you made your way down to the expensive seats with the expectation that one of the players on the field might autograph it for you. There is also the time-honoured tradition of waiting for players to arrive and depart from the stadium in hopes of obtaining an autograph or a picture with one of your heroes. At no point was there a cashier there waiting to take your money. The argument was made to me that they have to make money somehow. However, last time I checked, these folks got paid for their television roles, so I’m sure their ramen noodle days are long behind them. The other argument is that the real travesty is that people pay these fees. That same friend went to Expo and was turned away from a $30- a-pop picture line because the celebrity was booked for the day. So it’s obvious that not everyone out there shares my thoughts on this topic. For me there’s just a principle and a class system implication when you’re paying someone to take a picture with you. I suppose the days of being grateful to your fans for getting you where you are in the first place are long gone. The days of fleecing them, however, are alive and well. Most athletes realize that if there’s no one in the stands, they don’t get paid, this doesn’t seem to translate to the comic book/science- fiction world. Souls for sale Shawn Loughlin Shawn’s Sense I’m going to borrow a little bit of style from my fellow Citizen editorial page roommate Arthur Black. “A house divided against itself cannot stand.” – Abraham Lincoln See, I borrowed the whole (kind-of) starting with a quote modus operandi that he uses. That particular quote, a paraphrasing of a Bible verse, was issued by Lincoln when he accepted the Republic Party’s nomination before he was elected president of The United States of America. While there are dozens of things he could have been referring to, he was talking about slavery. He stated that the United States could not endure if it were to half-support and half- oppose slavery. Now, while I certainly am not having to deal with slavery, I find myself at a similar cross- roads and conflict of being. Can I survive with half of my stuff several hours away? As of Tuesday of this week I’ll have vacated the amazingly great little house on Hamilton Street in Blyth and will have (hopefully) handed the keys over to some great folks who will be renting my former abode. (For those of you unaware, my girlfriend, Ashleigh, recently found herself a wonderful job in Mississauga and has relocated to that area. In turn, we have tried to sell and rent our home and the latter came about first.) I’ll be moving southwest to bunk with my family in Goderich for the time being until the future is a bit more certain but, since Ash is now in the Greater Toronto Area (GTA), she needs some furniture and kitchenwares and... well everything you need in a home. To that end, on Tuesday, I’ll be splitting my “stuff” as George Carlin called it, into two different piles. There will be the pile of things I need to keep myself entertained and comfortable and the stuff that can go to an apartment in the GTA. In that, I guess I’ll be somewhat divided. I can’t stand not finding something I’m looking for in my home as it is, imagine if I have to scour two different places. The second division is myself being divided from the community I work in. I don’t foresee this as being much of a problem; I really believe that the connections and relationships I’ve made in the past year and a bit of living in Blyth and the past two years of working in The Citizen’s coverage area are good ones and will continue to help keep me in touch with what is important to the people here. Sure, it means I don’t really have a lawn to cut or a deck to sit on or a place people can drop by when they have some tid-bit of news they want to share, but I think things will continue on as they have. The only real downside to the move is that I’ll no longer be able to roll out of bed 45 minutes before I have to be at work; 25 minutes of each morning is going to be driving to and from work. While I am divided from Ashleigh by nearly two hundred kilometres (and three to four hours depending on traffic), we’ve done the long-distance thing before, so I don’t see any huge problems erupting from that. (Heck, she’ll probably love not having to find small pieces of plastic all over the kitchen from me opening freezies on hot days). However, with every closed door opens a window and I’m more than happy to climb through it. Moving to Goderich will afford me some chances to reconnect with a couple family members (beyond my father) that I haven’t seen anywhere near often enough over the past few years (since I last lived in Goderich); my father’s two dogs Bishop and Maverick. Bishop, a cross of several large breeds of dogs is one of the most energetic large dogs I’ve ever met and, if you can get past the fact that he sheds enough to build another version of himself once or twice a week during shedding times, he’s probably one of my favourite dogs of all time. Maverick is a Heinz 57 if ever there was one. Unfortunately, he may be less fond of me after I kick him out of the room that he’s typically claimed as his own. To be fair, though, I did have that room first before he ever came to live at my dad’s place. I’ll also get to spend some time with my brother, for better or worse, and try to be as positive an influence as I can be on his life. That may sound a bit off or a bit sappy but, given that he’s 10 years younger than I, my five years at school meant that I missed out on a lot of opportunities to spend time with him and his twin sister. So yes, I am a man divided from a house divided for the time being and I’m trying my darndest to make it work and prove Mr. Lincoln wrong. Oh, and just since so many huge world news stories are breaking as of late that I’m sure I won’t have enough time to properly address in a column given that I like to try and keep them timely, here are a collection of comments I would make about the state of the world: • The engagement rules that United Forces are being held to that are forcing them to act as bait for Taliban fighters are ridiculous. Soldiers shouldn’t have to risk getting shot at first before they can shoot at combatants. • Leave Chad Kroeger and Avril Lavigne alone. Even if you don’t like their music, they are both wildly successful musicians, so someone out there must enjoy what they do enough to buy their albums. • Hockey players are still paid way too much. • Man, I hate Gary Bettman. In the meantime, if you’re one of the folks I talked to on a regular basis in Blyth and you’re really jonesing to hear what life is like for the reporter commuting from Goderich, I’ll always need to get a cup of coffee or a meal somewhere local since I won’t be heading home for lunch four-out-of-five workdays a week. Feel free to drop by and say hello. A man divided has to stand Denny Scott Denny’s Den