HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Exeter Times-Advocate, 1940-11-07, Page 7THE EXETER TIMES-ADVOCATE THURSDAY, NOPMW 7, 1010
4
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HI A bJL /•*. *4
(Solomon, who died 975 years be
fore the birth of Christ, was the ab
lest and wealthiest man of ancient
times. He was more than that;
a writer of extraordinary gifts who
made a reputation for wisdom never
exceeded before or since,
His private establishment includ
ed a household that required 900
bushels of flour, 30 oxen and 100
sheep for each day. He kept 40,000
horses and a great number of drom
edaries, and lavished a portion of his
vast resources on the building of
his famous temple which was thir
teen years in the course of construc
tion.
* * *
EPITAPH
'"""This’’ monument is erected to tha
memory of Patrick Dooley, who was
accidentally shot by his brother, as
a mark of affection.
* * *
The Eternal Bargain-Hunter
He: “A thousand ways I’ll prove
you mine
My priceless bride I’ll make
you!
She: “If you ‘will say nine ninety-
nine
I guess perhaps I'll take you!”
* * *
Senator Glum Tells Us — Three
men in Pennsylvania were buried in
a landslide and they were not Re
publicans either — At certain times
of the year, one of my constituents
tells me, he can’t seem to throw off
the .feeling that the Senate is med
dling with the weather.
* * *
How A. Friend Was Lost
n We are one of those unfortunate
individuals who always seem to say
the wrong thing at the right time.
Just the other day we had lunch
with that person who occasionally
contributes a bit of prose to this
column under the pen name of ‘The
Potentate of Pocatella.’ He was
telling of an unusual experience. It
seems he got out a suit of clothes
that had been hanging in the back
of his closet since last fall — and in
one of the trousers pockets he found
a big roll of 'bills which he had en
tirely forgotten about.
“Were they receipted?” we ask
ed. But somehow, our. attempt at
being funny fell flat — as usual.
$ He
Jiminy (the pest) Crickets stop
ped by our desk the other P.iM. just
before quitting time with this story.
At the time we thought it was funny
but are not so sure now.
Well,( anyway, here it is—
“A man of inquiring disposition
tried an interesting experiment with
an ordinary salt water herring. He
put the fish into a large bowl of
salt water and every day substi
tuted an equal amount of fresh
water until the herring lived and
thrived in purely fresh water,
“The man was so pleased with
the success of the experiment that
he began daily to remove a small
quantity of water from the bowl un
til it was empty. The herring
seemed to do very well without it
and since it lived in the empty bowl,
he took it out and put it in a cage.
“There is lived happily, hopping
from perch to perch, just like a bird
until one day some sudden noise
startled it, and it fell into the water
trough and was drowned.”
* * «
THE other night
I HEARD a fellow say
• THAT the guy who invented
SKID chains
DID a lot of good
FOR the world
BUT if you ask me
I’D SAY nobody
’ INVENTED skid chains
THEY just got the
IDEA from your ..ancestors
WHOM the law equipped
WITH ball and chain
WlHEN they slipped
FROM the well-known
STRAIGHT and
NARROW.
Grewsome Apparition
Nagging, Dragging
Pains In the Baek
Many women have to do their own
housework, and the constant bend
ing over, lifting, making beds,
sweeping, ironing, sowing, so neces
sary to perform their household
duties puts a heavy Btrhin on the
back and kidneys, and if there ware
no kidney weakness the back would
be strong and well.
Doan’s Kidney Pills held to give
relief to weak, backache, kidnoy suf
fering women.Doan’S Kidney Pills mo put up in an oblong grey box with our‘trade
mark a “Maple Leaf” oil the
^Don’t accept a substitute. Be
sore and get "Doan’s?
Th* T. Milburn Co., Ltd., Ont.
You do not have to believe this one
—but—-
Passing thru a small city - popu
lation about 4 p.m. - down state last
Wednesday, we stopped for lunch at
a likely looking spot. Afterward,
while walking up the street, we
passed a store window filled wibh
men’s hats, and in the center was
something new in headgear: a pie
crust, packed in the mold of a hat,
and flanked with a sign which read:
“Special This 'Week- Only — the
ideal hat for those who lost an elec
tion bet - easily digested.”
—Hat passer
* * *
I have tried to forget
That we were friends
I never even speak your name
But by some strange chance
I heard someone speak of you
Just the other day
And I had to bite my
Lips to hold back
The scalding tears
That would have
Betrayed my secret.
—(Apprentice nurse.* * *
Can You Blaine Him
Not so long ago my wife and I
were playing cards at the house of
friends. About eleven o’clock, the
hostess, endeavoring to make a rare
bit in a chafing dish, blew out a fuse
and cut the electric circuit which
included the basement.
It seems that the basement con
tained among other things, a keg of
. -cider and it fell to the lot of the
husband to descend into the dark
ness to draw it off. For the pur
pose, his wife equipped him with a
cut glass pitcher. Half way down the
steps he stumbled, fell and hit the
J bottom will a resounding thump. Up
stairs, we heard the sound of his fall
and rushed to the top of the stairs.
“Pa,” his wife called in a voice
of alarm, “did you break the pit
cher?”
“No, I didn’t,” came back a dis
gruntled voice, “but, by gosh, I’m
going to now!”
—^Another Old Timer -* * *
It’s A Good Joke Even If It Isn’t
True.
Governor John Bricker of Ohio
one day appeared before the as
sembled convicts at the state peni
tentiary to make a speech.
Forgetting his audience, he start
ed in the usual manner, “Fellow
Citizens.” A murmur of laughter
followed and the governor recover
ing his poise started again. “Fellow
Convicts” —• and the laughter was
greater than before. Then in an ef
fort to get going again, Governor
Bricker began: “Oh, you know what
I mean -—■ I mean I’m glad to see
so many of you here today-—’’
And then, the warden had to
pinch hit for the Governor while he
stepped from the rostrum to collect
his thoughts so he could deliver the
message he had intended.
$ V *
Confucius actually did say —
When your neighbor’s house is on
fire, carry water to your own.
An evil father begets an evil
daughter and an evil mother begets
an evil son.
’Tis a bad house that has neither
I an old man nor an old woman in
it.
There is no standing in the world
without stooping.
Buy laud that slopes toward the
center and marry a woman who’s
mother is good.
'Count your money before enter
ing the temple and after you leave
lawmakers.
Pious word hides an evil mind.* * *
TRUTH
Sign in a cemetery near Albany:
“This Is a One Way Drive.”
* * *
Not So Good
The stranger was playing euchre
with a Hebrew drummer, and at
one stage of the game, he looked at
his hand and remarked: “If you give
me a queen and turn this into a
poker game, I’ll bet you $100 on the
hand.”
The drummer looked at his hand
and then in great excitement ex
claimed: “All right! And I’ll raise
you $1,000. Here’s your qu-veen.”
The stranger accepted the raise,
and the hands were laid down on
‘the table. The stranger held four
aces-—the drummer, four kings. The
loser, showing signs of great mental
distress, separated himself with
some difficulty from the $1,100.
Then, he looked at the stranger
and in some bewilderment, said:
“Say, vhy did you vant that qu-
veen for?”* * #
The cares that are yours
The prayers that you pray
I try to bring to this column
That is both serious and gay.
-—the colonel
Those trained soldiers make a gallant showing.* * * * * * * *
There's one thing that is certain about this fall weather. It
changes.******** 9
The Italian planes have been assigned the task of molesting
Britain. The German planes are seeking safer prey.
********
And now the learned folk are telling us that the swastika is
of Semitic origin with a distinct leaning towards the Jewish nation.
* * * * * * * *
The local turnip-waxing industry is in full swing. The turnips
are reported to be a good yield and of unusually good texture and
flavour.* * * * * * * *
There’s a lot of conjecturing Ibeing done in regard to the sink
ing of that (Canadian destroyer. We’d like to be made acquainted
with the facts.********
Part of the thanks go to the parents who saw to it that«we
had a sane Hallowe’en. The remainder of the thanks go to the
grave-faced authority who let it be known that mischief and des
truction of property on Hallowe’en is the same as mischief and
destruction of property on any other evening 'and that they simply
would not be overlooked.
********
SIMPLY ABOMINABLE
An ugly word is going about that some people on this side of
the Atlantic are trading with the Nazis. In all fairness, these pests
must be found out and advertised' and left to the lash of public
scorn. Talk about fifth columnists and 'chiselers! They are public
(benefactors by comparison with those who have truck and trade
with the redhand Nazis.
**»**«*» •
DARK DAYS
Bad word has a way of coming to us these days. Bad as the
word is we have yet to meet a single quitter. Fourteen months
ago we were told by His Majesty that the struggle ahead would be
hard. Mr Churchill spoke of our fighting for our existence when
the towns and cities of England were demolished by our enemies.
He told us, also of the time when our efforts and our sacrifices
would be crowned with victory. Better still, we have seen some
thing in the eyes of our women and in the step of our youth and
the squared shoulders of our men carrying the responsibilities of the
hour that portends but one thing and that one thing is the triumph
of he human spirit. We are not sailing for the gulf of despair
but for the cape of Good Hope. Meanwhile as we feel the lash
of the waves and are blown upon by the hurricane we know Who
* is in the boat with us and thank God and take courage.******* *
NOT SO BAD '
We are sympathetic with the farmers this hour. They have
had a difficult summer. Peas and beans and canning corn have
been a disappointment. Fall wheat and cereals have been harvested
under grave difficulties. Red clover and alsike and alfalfa seed
have proven poor affairs. Fall plowing is far behind. Still 1940
is far from through with us. Difficult as the times are through
crop mischances the situation is nothing like as difficult as in the
late 1870’s and 188O’’s. Prices are decidedly 'better than they
were in those trying years. Yet the farmers survived those times.
Where the rural dweller in those days had one comfort, they now
have ten. Some farmers have come near to defeat, but others
have won out under more difficult circumstances than the present.
Farmers may set down 1940 as one of their best years.
* * * » * > * * *
THOSE GREEKS
Another of the calamities of this present war is 'the’assault
made upon the Greeks. With characteristic cowardice, the Italians,
with their hands still dripping with Ethiopian blood, are assail
ing Greece without any show of reason. Along with the Germans,
the Italians are keen to seize the Suez canal in order that they may
have access to India, the land of wealth, that offers such an easy
road to plunder. Greece is geographically in the way and so the
land of the Greeks must be ravaged. With unabashed affrontery
the' Italians tell the world that they have the opportunity to rob
and plunder and that they 'mean to push their advantage to the
limit. They are midnight sneak thieves and unashamed. To the
Italians and Germans alike, plunder is more to be desired than fair
play. If another man’s blood stands in the way of obtaining his
goods, his blood must flow like water. Hitler must smile as he
sees Italians slaughtering and being slaughtered in order that his
own evil designs may be carried out, Mussolini is stupider than
we thought him as he does the catspaw act for his German master.
****** * *
A GRIM JOKE
Hitler is master of getting other people to do his will and
making them like his- deception. About his last move is liis giving
back to France a 'million and a half of her sous whom he held as
prisoners in order that they might become the active foes of Britain.
As long as those Frenchmen were prisoners in Germany, Germany
was called upon- to feed them. Let go free, France must feed them.
But that is not all, these men when taken prisoners were standing
side by side with Britain who was pouring out her blood and
treasure for these very men. Next, these freed Frenchmen are
expected to turn their powers against their former brothers in arms.
Was ever .such perfidy known to history? Yet it is to Britain that
France looks for her final liberation from her present bondage.
France and Italy alike are holding daggers at the British breast,
the one source where they hope to draw their life. So m.uch for
men and nations not built up around a conscience.
*.* * * * * * *
THERE’S ANOTHER SIDE TO IT
'We have heard it said a good many times that it is not fair
to pay one man ten dollars a day for making bullets while the man
who stops them gets but one dollar a day. Everyone feels the
force of this statement. In an hour so perilous, every man should
be willing to put his best into the common fund of national defence
and aggression. Let it not be forgotten, however, that the govern
ment must do its best to get the best out of its civilians. The one
aim is to stop the foe and to bring him to heel where he belongs.
But all men do not respond to the cry for public service. Yet they
can make bullets and the government must have their service even
though they pay extravagant wages to have them do so. These
sordid souls must be got into the service of the country. These
men who will not serve in the present crisis unless they are paid
unreasonably therefor will have their reward, but no part of that
reward will be the esteem of right thinking men. The tide of pub
lic opinion is rising against them. As sure as fate they’ll find their
gold won at the price of another’s b.lood, doing them precious little
good. Justice is the nature of things. We know of more than one
war millionaire who has eked out a hang-dog existence. The mills
of the gods will grind more finely in the future than they have
in the past. Let timesavers and mercenary souls take notice.
********
WHAT ABOUT THE U.S. ELECTION
’ Before this is in print the election in the United States will
have been fought and won. (Should the 'Democrats have been re
tained in power it will mean that aid to Britain will be given the
priority over the home defence of the United (States. Should the
Republicans have been elected it will mean that the defence of the
United States will be given priority over aid to Britain. The Demo
crats believe that aid to Britain at this stage is the best defence
to American shofeS. The Republicans beli&ve the /best defence of
United 'States shores is the strengthening of local ports and there
you are. 'Should the Democrats have been returned it will mean
approval by the United States of the domestic policy of President
Roosevelt. Evon in the case of such an approval that policy must
be modified, as it will never do to continue the policy of taking the
tools out of the hands that can use them and placing them in the
hands of the inexperienced. The world waited with .more than us
ual interest what the United States would do. Delays and uncer
tainty on the part of the republic will be ruinous at this juncture.
Chamberlain foresaw this moment when he spoke of civilization
as facing chaos. At any rate, Dhole Sam will now get down to
work.
Art of Plowing
Forms Basis of
Good Farming
High Standard of Work is Attained
Only in Lifetime
By Rev. Jas. Anthony in the
London Free Press
One thousand spectators looked
at the South Huron plowing match
held on the farm of Robert Munn,
two miles from Hensail, at 32 con
testants, 15 of them guiders of the
horse-drawn plow and 17 of them
tractor plowmen. The Free Press
already has given its readers a list
of the winners. It remains for me
to give an account of some com
ments made on that occasion.
“We are not here to see hand
moulding of the sod. We are here
to see plowing.” one spectator com
mented. I asked John T. Allison,
himself a practical farmer and a
topnotch prize winner of a few years
ago, what he thought of this re
mark.
“We are here to see what can be
done in the way of good plowing.
We want to see what the land
would look life if it were properly
plowed. If the plow doesn’t do the
work just as we think it should be
done, the manufacturers take the
( hint and improve the make o£
I their plows. ‘ There is a keen rival
ry among the plowmakers,” Mr.
Allison replied.
Patience
“I don’t see any of the long iron
plows with the high cut outfit,” I
suggested.
“No, the day for that sort of
thing is practically gone,” the vet
eran replied. “We have different
ways of cultivating soil ■ since those
plows had their day,” the veteran
replied.
I One needed the strength of Sam
son, the patience of Job and the
eyes of a hawk to get the best out
of one of those old iron plows.
Many a young man had the very
life lugged out of him manipula
ting one of these heavy affairs.
“Tell us about the crown,” I said
to one veteran looking on.
“You see this plowman busy with
those two light furrows that he is
I cutting so fine, that you would
think he was a butcher cutting
I bacon with his machine? That is
some job, I can tell you. But it is
no more difficult than the two fur
rows that this plowman has turned.
These furrows must be the same
weight, thickness, I mean and they
must cover the first two I showed
you. They must match perfectly
if possible. Those furrows make
up the crown. That crown must
be as nearly level as possible. It’s a
man’s job putting up a good crown.’
“Is the plowing as good in the
middle f the field as it is at the
ends?” I pursued.
“Were you ever at a plowing
match where the Hoods, or the
Rennies, of Scarboro, were judges?
You’d see these men tramping
across the fields and looking after
the solidity of the work. Good
judges are not humbugged. Plow
ing must be done honestly these
days if it is to get good awards.
Just watch that fellow. He knows
his business. See how he moves the
plow handles from one level to an
other.
By doing so he controls the pres
sure of the furrow, a very impor
tant part of the plowing and very
difficult to do properly. He watches
the little rises and hollow places
in the soil and deepens or shallows
his furrow accordingly. In that way
he keeps his furrow of even thick
ness.
The sun was setting towards the
horizon and I was curious about
what the plowman calls the finish
of the land.
“What about it?” I asked still
another veteran.
Experience
“That’s some job,” he answered.
“Notice this man. . He’s trying to
turn the last strip of green about
eight inches wide. The width of
this bit of green depends upon the j moisture of the sod, the length of
the grass and the general tough
ness of the soil. Only experience
gives one good judgment. Notice
he’s taking this furrow some shal
lower than usual. Here experience
and a steady horse and steady hand
count tremendously. Now he’s tak
ing out one of his horses to plow
this next furrow with One horse.
This last furrow that he’s turning
tries every nerve. It must be the
right depth. It mu,st be drawn so
as to place it up against the fur
row next it just the right height,
A few slips and he’s done for. You
should have seen Simpson Rennie
and Andrew Hood at tills work. Jim
McLean could toll you.”
There w! one horse at the fin
ish throwing «his head and stagger
ing a bit. “The collar is not right
another veteran explained, “I’ll
soon fix that and the adjustment
was made and the land finished in
comfort.
To look on, the spectator sees
very little at a plowing match till
an experienced man tells him about
the way the horse should be har
nessed,. trained, spoken to, the way
the clevises should be set, the trac
es lengthened or shortened, the
jointer set for depth and position,
the plow beam, the length of the
shoe and the curve of the mould
board and the set of the coulter.
Little wonder that highgrade plow
ing is an art to he learned only in a
lifetime and little wonder that Simp
son Rennie regarded plowing as the
foundation of good farming,
PLASTIC PLANES
When about six years ago chemis
try introduced transparent plastics
for (aircraft production, there ap
peared vast new possibilities in the
field of aircraft design. But fight
ing today with the air force these
modern materials are destined to
live and fly again another day
and give some idea of what aero
planes of 1944 may .be like in the
new Aerial Age, writes G. H. Mosher
in the October issue of C-I-L- Oval,
Designers seized upon this cry
stal clear substance, which had the
translucent properties of glass but
was shatterproof and could be mold
ed under heat treatment to any re
quired curvatures. With it they
achieved advanced streamlining and
greater increases in speed. As war
aircraft production became inpera-
tive nd more widespread, transpar
ent plastics were used for gun tur
rets, bomb-aimers’ windows and
windowscreens or bombers and fight
ers. For this purpose it left nothing
to be desired, for it would not shat
ter under the impact of bullets, it
was light in weight, gave maximum
visability to the air crew, and could
be shaped to provide the least wind
resistance at high speeds, according
to the article. With transparent
plastics the square corners were
knocked off the aircraft.
Aircraft in 1940 are still expen
sive hand-made machines, built up
by the careful assembly of some
times as many as 50,0 00 individual
parts. A method of mass-produc
tion, which will simplify the con
struction and reduce the price of a
private light aeroplane to something
comparable with what is paid for
automobiles today, is what is re
quired to bring flying within the
reach of the average man. That
such cheap mass-production, will be
possible within the next year or
two is practically a certainty.—
thanks again to plastics, concludes
Mr. Mosher.
MICHELS’ HYBRID GRASS
(Experimental Farm News}
“Michels' Hybrid Grass” is claim
ed to have originated from a cross
between “Mosida” winter wheat and-
a native perennial grass known as
“Giap Wild Rye" (EJIymus conden-
satus), It has been described as
being perennial in habit of growth
and to possess, among other desir *
able characters, unusual productiv
ity, ability to produce with limited
moisture, and ability to recover
quickly when grazed off.
The Division of Forage plants*
Dominion Experimental Farm Ser
vice, laid down tests with “Michel’s
Hybrid Grass” in the fall of 1937
and again in the spring of 1938- and.
in 1939. Tests were sown at Ot
tawa and at,Saskatoon. Some mater
ial was also grown at Swift Cur
rent, Sask. The following infoma
tion is based upon data secured from
these tests, states Dr. T. M. Steven
son, Dominion Agrostologist.
The plants of “Michels’ Hybrid
Grass” as far as seed and vegetative
characters are concerned, did not
differ, in any important agronomic
respects, from plants of fall rye.
The plants made about as much
growth, but certainly not more,
than would normally be expected
from fall rye under similar condi
tions. There was considerable er
got in the mature heads. Actual
counts showed that only 6.7 per
cent of the plants survived the sec
ond winter, in the field under the
conditions of these tests, and these
produced a very weak growth. It
has been observed that a few plants
of certain varieties of fall rye also
frequently survive the second win
ter in the field.
The results of these tests indi
cate that “Michels’ Hybrid Grass”
may be expected to perform in a
manner similar to fall rye. It can
not be regarded as a persistent per
ennial under the conditions of
these tests, and there is no evidence
of it possessing greater forage value
than fall rye.
y&Me id no ctfiek.
tc^ncco JUST LIKE
Sale of a Masterpiece
It’s written in boyish fashion,
A simple and childish scroll;
I wrote it when wild with passion
And in it I wrote my soul.
I gave not a thought to diction,
I gave not -a thought to gold,
Nor if it were truth or fiction,
And now it’s about to be sold.
For Commerce is e’er the destroyer
Of Art - and my fate I can see,
For she took it ’round to her lawyer
And the guy who will buy it is me
—Paul McCrea
£ It is your pay envelope when you get too
old to work-—yours to spend in the freedom
of retirement.
It is a pay envelope for your wife and children
in the event of your death.
A Confederation Life Policy will provide for
your family—and when your children are
grown up, it will provide for you. ;
When tt Confederation Life representative
Calls upon you, consult him. He is trained
to advise you.
Confederation Life
heaO office Association TORONTO
ONE OF THE WORLD’S GREAT LIFE INSURANCE INSTITUTIONS
F. 1 DELBRIDGE, Representative EXETER