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The Exeter Times-Advocate, 1941-07-03, Page 7THE .EXETER TIMESrADVOCATE tario? * the western Not one discordant note. We wonder if that wheat Best, the saw fly, is on its way to On™ Better take a few days off and rest up for vacation. f. * 'u # '» «» B » < Jias the spending of that fifty millions to prevent farmers from producing wheat made you rich? ♦ * .♦ f ♦ *' W * # B B / Peflnitely Descriptive DeHiUtioiis Baldness—hair today and gone tomorrow, ‘ • Expert-—a clever man who tells a woman he -understands her-—a stupid one who tries to prove it. A kiss—combining the best fea­ tures of both-. • »Poiiteness-^-the most gratifying .hypoicracy, . Matron on ■ diet—-gaunt but not forgotten. ■ Love:—the thing that made Qscar "Wilde and Brigham Young, Fun—like life insurance, the older you -get, the more it costs. Etiquette—for people of ho breeding, Marriage—the splice of life. Chagrin—whqt .you feel when you find out the girl you've been taking out in the taxi is married to the driver. No man’s land—Y.W.C.A. Fool—I pity him. - I’Ve been myself. Bachelor—a man who knows much about married life. 1 sweet Liberty!) —^-Connie (aided and abetted.), " * * * " Up to the time a son reaches ten— his dad knows everything,* * * The boy stood in the batter’s box So firm and tall stood he. Imagine his surprised chagrin "When he was stpng by a bumble­ bee !|» one j too (Ah, *)*—Millie Lou* FINAL FIGURES- IN HURON COUNTY VICTORY LOAN DRIVE The figures show the amount raised by each canvasser and number of applications. ♦ * * Vice-Chairman Thos. Pryde the Draping the sunlight’s auriferous stair cobalt of heaven looms scenting the fragrant, clari­ fied air balsam and spruce perfume. The While Are A silvery, splash as the line spins out A flip of piscatory fins, And just at the end of a finny joust The darned ol’ Tarm clock begins. —Apprentice Nurse Following are the telegrams ex­ changed between a certain young fellow (whose name we won’t men­ tion) who was honeymooning in the North and his boss. “It certainly is wonderful here stop may I have an additional weel; stop.’ The boss’s answei’ (the old meanie): “It is wonderful anywhere stop report at office Monday morning.” \—-Pent House’ Phil. *1 * * When, you waht something pick an enthusiastic man *■ to the job.* * * * * done, boss Why not noses of <» the Command? load a horses few and torment the 0 shells with those files that send , them in among the German High Hay Township Quota $74,750* 32,050 6,750 21,650 t Wonderful Birds An expedition was sent to one of the southern states of America to observe an eclipse of the sun. The j day before the event, one of its members said to an old darky be­ longing to the house where he was staying: “Tom, if you- will watch your chickens tomorrow morning, you’ll find that they‘11 all go to roost at 11 o’clock.” .Tom was skeptical, but sure ‘enough, at the time predicted, the sky darkened, and the chickens Re­ tired to roost, The-Negro, amazed, bdyond measure, sought put the scientist and asked; “Professor;'liow long ago did you know dem chick­ ens would go to roost?” “About a year ago,” he replied with a smile. “Well, if date don’t beat all!” said Tom. “Why .puerfessor, a year ago dem chickens wa’n’-t even hatched!” —Silas Posthumous Johnston * * * I I Pert and Pertinent “Man’s Inhumanity to Man. —makes countless thousands buy ringside seats. » . “The kilt still has many suppor­ ters in Scotland...” ’ • —well, it would certainly be em­ barrassing if it hadn’t. "Going over Niagara Falls in a barrel or'doing a ‘Steve’Brody’ off the Brooklyn Bridge is now passe...... —if it’s publicity you want, try walking! across traffic on stilts. “New York State Experiment Station announces that it has dis- ■ covered what, makes a peaChybrown” —take one look at the modern bathing suits and then remember Old Sol has been doing this very job effectively for lo, these many years. - these many What’s the Minimum Down Payment?t “Write • out an ad for that Elm Street residence,’ said the real es­ tate broker to his Very Modern Of- • fice Assistant. “It has a built-in buffet, bay wind'ow on the south, in­ n-door beds, combination electric and gas fixtures, maid’s room in the basement, fire place in the. lib­ rary, lawn, flower beds, and chick­ en house.” Ten* minutes later the V.M.O.A. handed in the following copy: “Per­ manent bar, alderman’s pantry on the sunny side, vanishing dream­ teasels, combination wind-burners and icurrent bushes, maiden’s bow­ er below the frost line, Santa Claus entrance in the bookshop, work for father, daisy sleepers, and egg fac­ tory.” -Rhet Oric * * - * “But Bertha, how did you make the acquaintance of your second husband?” . “It tyas quite rofnantic. You see, I was crossing the 'Street with my first husband, when my second hus­ band, came alohgwin a car and^ran him down. That Was the beginning of our friendship.” ‘ . —.Six Bachelor Maids - # w . 4' . ■Close by the edge of ?a fir-lined shore Alone in a roomy boat; Beautiful.solitUd^ by the score, ’4' a -—Oley Okeydoke you will know that other other countries are tax- too, here: is a verse from' *■ Just so people fin conscious Australia: Pay Up and Smile! , We talk about the taxes, * And some are. fra from dumb "■ On the higher cost of living; Of tobacco, tea and rum. But to win a war takes money, So although we don’t keep mum, We know its going to cost us all A tidy little sum. So When they come collecting A bob a month for smokes, To send away to other lands F'or all the Digger blokes, There’s a blighter we object to, Be he squatter, thief or hum, Who says, when asked to pay his ■ ■< • b°b> ' “It’s quite a tidy sum.” ‘V And.there are some who say it, Though it’s hard to understand/ From those who live in comfort, In this peaceful quiet .land. ' If their . home was bomb-racked . . London They mightn’t look so glum). Or begrudge that monthly shilling, That tidy little suni. —The Woolshed Rhymer* * * . Drop a Pebble Drop a pebble in the water, just a splash anil it is gone, But -there’s half a hundred ripples f circling on, and on, and on; Spreading, spreading from the cen- flowing on out to -the *1- An 4 ter, sea, f there ain’t no way of telling where the end is going to be, Magging, Dragging! Pains In the Back | Many women hard, to. do their own 3 housework, and the constant bend-1 ing over, lifting, making beds,^ sweeping, ironing, aowing, so ncee8- fldry to perform thOuf household h duties puts a heavy Strain on the back and kidneys, and if thero were nd kidney weakness the back would be strong and well , , ' ... - Doan’s Kidney Fills help ttf grv® relief to weak, backache, Maimy gat- feting Womem . , .... Doan’s Kidney Pills;aro in an oblong grey bort: with Our trade mark a ‘Qtfaple on the ^Don?i accept a Bhb«iltdM Be flwro and got «I>oah*A’* "* "Th* T.- Milburn 0^ tW-* tKrwto, <M. * < Drop an unkind word, or careless, in a minU'te it is gone, But there’s half a hundred ripples, •circling on, and on, and on; They keep spreading, spreading, spreading, from "the center as they go, And there ain’t nd way to stop them, once yott started them to ■ floW. Drop a word of Cheer and kindness, just a flash and it is gone, tipples, and OU, comfort dashing. But there’s half a hundred circling on, and Oh, Bearing hope and joy and on each splashing, ‘'wave, Till you.wouldn’t believe the volume of the one kind word you • gave, # ■ * w On the Fourth of July, •’■Bill Holsum Was taking a walk near Folsom And in two -cut a worm Before it could squirm. Because he thought It was lone­ some. . . % mww JULY »r4L 1.MJ 14.450 Want some of those good Bray jtaileta in. your wsts next Winter Let w know how many. No let­ ters, money orders delays ust prompt action. Some -started pul­ let® available if you act fast, bray chick hatchery Phone 216, Exeter or Canada .Packers, Exeter; Elam W, Shantz, R.R, No. $, Hepsall, Alvin W, Kcrslake, Hensail. Agents , 3640 6 143 jper cent of quota, . Town of Goderich Quota, $159,900 received from 4,428 applications. Banks .......................^,..2 2 0,000 • R. C. Whately ......... 40,000 73' E. Groves ................ 16,450 50 H. Ford ............... 24,500 53: H. Long .................... 21,6.50 36; O. Ginn .......... 11,100 36 330,900-248 : 2X0 per cent of quota. Winglmm Quota,$77,150 Banks ’ ........................... 75,350' A, E. Cosens ........ . 6,100 20 W. ,T.. Booth ................... 10,200 8 A, Forbes .................... 55,700 113 Roy Hudson ... . 3,200 25 H. Pym ....................... 8,900'52 159,450 218 207 per cent of quota. Brussels Quota,$aa,750 Banks ....................... 27,500 Robt. BoWman ............ 19,000 26 'Robt. Warwick ........... 15,400 36 61,900 62 273 per cent of quota. Special Names Goderich .....................115,00.0 Seaforth ........................ 10,000 Exeter ......................... 2,000 Through Banks ,........... 9,100 The total for the whole county of Huron reached $2,248,500 or 160 pei’ 'cent of the quota. This sum was Banks ....... W, Edighoffer A. Edighoffer- 23 56 Exeter Elmer Klopp .............. 100 1 Don McKinnon ............ 6,250 11 R. Paterson ........... .... 1,250 3 B, McNaughton ........... 3,150 13 • n ,, 71,200-107 99 per cent of quota. Hensall Quota,$19,650 Banks .............................22,900 Don McKinnon ........... 29,550 27 R, Paterson ................ 9.500 27 P. McNaughton ........... 5.500 17 67,500 71 •344 per cent of quota. Tuckersmith Twp. Quota,$46,500 Banks ........................... 23,900- W, Crich .................. 16,800 143 H. Jackson ................. 18.750 52 A. Nich'olson .............. 16,(850-55 ’ 76,300 250 164 per. cent of quota. •Stephen Twp. Quota,$71,450 Banks D.*B. Field ................ 3,250 16 E. Beaver .................. 2,650 15 C. Anderson .............'....11,050 21 R. A. Goetz .............. 11,500 8 A, G. Webb .............. 9,150 24 Thos. Webb .............. 4,000 11 H. K: Bilber ................12,550 12- 82,700 107 116 per cent of quota. Usborne Twp. Quota,$49,300 Banks ........................ 25,700 Newton' Clark ............... 7,850 42 A. Wiseman ............... 11,650 30 F. Dawson ..........:....... 13,450 78 A. Morgan ................... 11,950 85 70,600 235 .142 per cent of quota. ** .♦ * , * ■* There’s a yery nice friend ofiyours who would like to sniff the fresh air of Lake Huron, should it be for but a few hours, one j days when the waves come*tumbling in. * * a * * * * * of these ripping We wonder Do-AU-the-Work . to the Bend. “Big heap move along! * * * ' * * what big chief Hit-Tm-on-the-Back and his spouse, Would think of a modern auto as it whizzse over Ugh! Ugh! Vnunm.” * * * Let us keep on going to church these vacation Sundays. Doing duties and make the rest of theso will help us square .away for Sunday a real delight. * * * * Johnny and Mary think that this is a great world. You have • ‘ your choice between washin’ dishes, mowin’ the lawn, learnin’ les- is just one joyous procession of one \.** ♦ . * * * sons or, 'pickin.’ berries, thing after another. ■. V * *. ■ , . • ■ 4t Dad has lots of fun the' ninety, point. Life * * these days with the thermometer away over the' ninety point.' All he has to do is to Step lively in the store, the office or in the field for about ten hours in the day and then hoe the garden for:a couple of-hours before, breakfast and funny thing is that the variety life'affords. ■’i * fine old chap really enjoys after tea. The the delightful ** STOPPING THE PAPER Stopped my paper, yes I hev, didn’t like to do it, the editor he got too smart. I’ve I But And I allowed he’d rue it. I am a man as pays his debts, And I won’t be insulted, So when the editor gets smart, I want to be consulted. I took his paper ’leven years, An’ helped him all I could, sir, And when it comes to.dunnin’ me, I didn't think he would, sir. But that he did, and you kin bet It made me hot as thunder, Says I, “I’ll stap that sheet, I will, - If the cussed thing goes under!” I hunted up the measly whelp An’ for his cunning caper . paid him ’leven years and quit! Yes, sir, I’ve stopped my paper! —Dunnvllle’ Chronicle NO that procession of trucks loaded with cash No banners dance as these trucks roll into the factory yards. BALLYHOO tf No bands meet crops. " ' Old men don’t 'leave their chimney corners as the peas and "beans sweep by. However, the merchants smile. Those crops mean new shoes for. Johnny, tea and sugar and rice and currants for the table, a'new dress for mother and a new pair of overalls-for dad, to say nothing of a" new book for the youngsters. But' our pen -cannot tell you all that those truck loads of good things mean not only for the farmers, but for Exeter, and Canada, and the whole world. It is not fun altogether to load and ,cut such crops when the thermometer is at eighty-four but that is the way things are done—we mean things that are worthwhile. Thought, preparation, hard work and sticking at it, these are the rounds of the ladder that keeps the country out of the slough of despond. # WORTH OBSERVING We have in mind the faces of our lawn bowlers. We have no intention of saying anything about- regularity of features or about that much-talked-Of schoolgirl complexion,. We’re thinking of the lines of care, and such things as are sure to be found in the faces • of .men who are worth their salt these trying days. When the own-., ers of such faces come to the bowling green, they look weary and depressed. Each line has its history of hard work, and, it may be, < of disappointment. * The interesting thing is to see these lines grad­ ually fade opt and the lines of good fellowship and pursuits of happiness take their place. It is good to hear three score or three score and ten sliou,t like twelve or fifteen. Eyes that have not shone overmuch these last few months sparkle and shine and even ... gleam as the resting place of ‘the kitty is eagerly sought for. And how the chin lifts as the desired port of entry is sought and entered! ' The faces “after taking” the bowling .green treatment are very dif­ ferent from those “before taking”. I All work' and no- play put Bill Businessman op. the rocks. The green sets him sailing happily over summer seas. . ” I I The 'green sets him sailing, happily over :' > - -■ » ' ■■ * ' * ' * JUST A HINT of a' newspaper to ■ preach or to lecture.business c_ „ ___ _____________ _ „„ when it gives the news and a fair interpi’etation It’s not. the It does its Work _ ___r____ _ ___ ____ _ of the news. Now, that’s precisely what we intend doing, in this well- meant paragraph. We have just heard of the death of one of the foremost farmers in Ontario and one'of the finest men to be found anywherb. He fell'dead in-his field last Monday, the Very place and the very method he’d have wished to pass to the still (country, where wars neyei’ come. He was just, seventy years of age, and hale and hearty. .Now he has gone from us. A whole county mourns his departure. " , We have heard about those three score and ten years in an old book. ,„Let us heed its warning. When a‘man reaches that age he had better not try to make himself believe he is a young man. He is anything’but. young. He simply cannot stand the swift 'pace to which these’dreadful- days allure him. HA may getby in doing so for a While, but that won’t take away the toll taken by the years. 1 The vim may be there but the vitality simply is not. there. Surely a word to the wise will be kindly taken. Ii . * . « ■ ♦ # < .'Hi * AND NK>W FOR VACATION School days are over for this part of the year and teachers and pupils are seeking new fields and pastures'new. Strange as it ■may seem, improved’methods of teaching and very much improved school buildings \and equipment have not taken the weariness out teaching. Boys and girls have .found that lessons simply must be learned if advance is to be made-in useful learning. No matter what hygiene is taught and practised, the physical-resources of pupils- and teachers becdme exhausted and must be replenished if disaster is to -be avoided. “The time cOmes When one simply must get away/’ One minister told us. Said another 'minister, “I never took holi­ days, but I followed a mistaken course, fW the people and myself.” “My. opposition refused to take holidays and I felt that I dared not be gway when he was busy at home. I.attended his funeral and con­ cluded that money spent on the golf course was life insurance,” one of the best business men in the province told me. Holidays are not frills but stern necessities, so let us take our pleasures and our . rest and be prbud that we have the sense that prompts Us to do so. A good year’s work may be done in ten or eleven months. It can- hot be done in twelve, not for any length of time, at least, We have just heard of the death of one of the Quota, $57,900 Banks ........................... 65.700 B. M. Francis .. 1'8,200 37 J. P. Bowey .............. 24,40'0 49 G. S. Howard ............. 19,600 43 R. N. CreecE ............. 24,300 55 152,200 184 263 per cent of quota. Vice-Chairman W. L., Whyte HuIIett Twp. ’ .Quota, $44,400 Banks ...................’....... 37,550 Walter Scott ............... 12,400 35 W. J. Dale ................. 16,150 43 66,100 78 McKillop Twp. ♦ • Quota, $50,100 Banks ........................... 10,900 Jack Eckert .......... 16,-800 58 H. Alexander .... 6,650 22 C. Hillen ...................- 3,700 30 J. McQuaid ................. 4,000 13 84 pei' c.ent 42,050 of quota. Clintoii Quota, $67,750 Explicit A local defense volunteer in a lonely spot ici’ied “Halt!” to a man in a car, who promptly halted. “Halt!” said the L.D.'C/again. 9 “I have halted,” said the motor­ ist. “What do you want me to do next?” ' ) “X don’t know,” said the L.D.V. “My orders are to say ‘Halt!’ three times and then shoot.’” Little Bobby, was eating an ear’ of corn for lunch. He noticed a yellow kernel among the white ones and held it up so everyone at the table could, see as he said: “Look, this ear of corn has a gold tooth!” ■ , ” AND WHAT NOAV? Well, Russia 1ms entered the war. Most of Us were surprised that she shouTd have taken .this step. We,looked for a good deal of bluff and then a" surrender.1 However,'4 the bear sniffed and grunted and growled and then got up on his hind legs and started something. Approaching dog days may have made a foot race Un­ desirable ’on his part. Perhaps he cherished the opinion that a fight with Germany was inevitable and 'Concluded that the time for getting the thing, over with was opportune. The British lion was gnawing the ribs of his unavoidable 'Opponent. The American eagle was making use of beak "and claw, Why should not the boar get going when the going was good? Of course the wise old bear knew that there would be after-the-war days when line fences would need readjusting, but it looked as if that .trying, exasperating matter could be better done with Britain and the U.S. th.an with Hitler and bls glorious way of disregarding all survey® and agreements exoepf those made by himself. At any rate we’re glad Stalin and Hitler are into it. When rogues fall out honest men 'sometimes get their due. Every blow Stalin lays, on the back of Hitler Weakens the prowess of the world’s number one nuisance, in any’case-We must see to it .that Stalin is backed, up by our best cheers and our soundest dollars and our best work and our richest gray matter.B'anks Banks ........................... 62,500 J. C. Radford ....... 18,600 43 E. L. Douglas ............. 13,950 38 H. C. Rotke ............... 20,200 45 G. S. Elliott ............ 19,150 57 134,400 180 20.4 per cent of quota. , Seaforth Quota, $6S,(>00 Banks .......................... 68,150 M. A. Reid ............. . 36,300 56 E. Chamberlain ........... 27,700 46 A. Y. McLean ............. 19.500 32 W*. A. Wright ............. 16,000 168 167,650 168 271 per cent pf quota, • ’ Stanley Ihvp. Quota, $46,060 Banks .......................... 31,600 John McAsh .........7,100 32 D. Aikenhead ... 7,700 35 A. Keyes .................., 5,450 31 51,8:50 98 113 -per cent of dtibta. Biyth Quota, $18,400 1 ILjdBO €MCo Phone 181, Ixeter b * Ml EMPIRE BRASS MFG. CO., MM®. Lbtidhh _ Hamilton. torbh-td ’ Sttdfbtiry Winnipeg. Vancouver •......... Oa/i'&eat f IbSLeCS L w _ r aiigi MANY users say that their Duro Water Supply Sys­ tem is their best in­ vestment because it’ furnishes constant running water; has reduced the drudgery of housework and permitted the instal-. lation of necessary sanitary conveni­ ences so essential to the health and com­ fort of a family. Are you doing without these daily requirements of family contentment? If’ so, a small expenditure for a Duio Water Supply System will remedy the condition. The Duro System can be bought with confidence. Al­ though the design has ilot been drastically changed, the quality has been constantly improved. Thousands of owners have had years of satisfactory service f rota their Duro Pumps. The Snow-white 20" x 42" Enamelled Sink,, illus­ trated above, including faucet ready for instab < lation, costs.................................«p5z*.yu Sink and Cabinet with faucet.......................................... $65.90 v (Trap, ifOti pipe; and fittings extra) The Duro Special Pump has a capacity of 250 gals, per hour; is supplied With a 25 gal, tank and 25 or 50 cycle motor. It costs only............ $86.00 Running water throughout your hbtae, makes it possible to have modern Emco Bathroom and Kitchen equipment. Emco products are quality built in all price ranges. The Duro Finance Flan enables you to spread the coat over a period of three years« v *