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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Wingham Times, 1885-12-18, Page 2YOUNG FOLKS. j r sl THE WOLF AND THEsBEAR. The Bear was feeling ill:one fall ; Saneighbor,Woifimade haste to call, Totell what but would suit his cane, And bring^the"color to his face, Now -Doctor Wolf was shrewd of mind- .AFsharper of the sharpest kind. eend when`hiel eyes had travelled o'er Opel Bruin's tempting winter store, ;daid,he;:e' ;Your;pulee is low indeed ; A:change of -life you sorely need, .A trip across the ocean blue Afightsbrace;yonr failing strength anew, O Greenland's climate might impart ,A smootber_action to your heart, But living high,'I plainly see, Ie what will dig the pit for thee. Unleae you change your present style, You'll hardly see the summer smile. Take good advice, and fling aeide Your salted pork and mutton dried ; The; pickled feet and homage give To those who'd rather die than live. Of roots and herbs your meale preparo, For health is found in simple fare." It eeemed to give the Bear delight To learn the way to live aright. So off the Drafty Doctor ran • r�•,.�/��`//tel 1 es - calif neat lall•e , fiTt —� I(ct. ke, ajl�fc'` — 3c, tell:his friends about the plan- How,Brnin now would feast no more 13a Stowe and roasts as heretofore, Bat freely scatter to the wind Provisions of the choicest kind, No eooner had the bats of night Commenced their wild, uncertain flight Ibex from the mountain and tho glen, Promrocky lair and earthy den, Tee beasts came trooping, great and small, To give the ailing Bear a call, With bag and basket well supplied, And apron strings securely tied, They gathered round to get their share Of food that might be ecattered there, Now Bruin had a humorous vein, The bet new wrinkle in overcoats hue been found in creasing. The right hand is the cleverest member of the body. It never gets left, Mrs, McEwen---" Dld you tip the waiter, Reery 1" Mr. MoEwen--r' Yee ; didn't you eco me gave him a quarter just • before he yrent for the check 2 But he tipped me back," Mrs. MoEw'n-" A waiter tip you, Henry 1" Mr. McEwen--" Certainly. he tipped me the wink when he handed me an eighty-five Cent check for a dollar•and•a-half hencheon." Strnok With Lightning. Neatly describes the position of a hard or+ twit corn when Putnam's painloas Corn lgttraotor le applied. It does ite work so letdekly and without pain that it enema magical in ration, Try it. Recoiled this name- Putnam's Painless Cotu Extractor. .s ,old by all dnlggliret :end deelere every As well as even•balanced•brain; And when he heard the rack and rout, He raised the sash, and, peeping out, A sober face he tried to chow While thus he hailed the crowd below. Said he, " WIth pain occurs the thought, You've lost your evening's rest for naught ; For, troth to tell, depart you will With bag and basket empty et;11, As I've decided to pursue My former aouree the season through, And change my diet by-and-by-- When y-and-by-When gone my preeent largo supply," A moral here enooverecl shines For those who read between the lines ; The brightest hopes will often, fade, However well the plane are Laid, Mother : " My little girl goes to sleep eo nicely every night when I sing to her, isn't that so, Mamie P' Mamie t " Yes, that's so." (Turning to her aunt.) " Don't tell mama, but I only make out that I am asleep to get her to stop ainging, she Pingo so aw- ful bad." Regular customer (disposed to be face tioue)-" I guess you'll have to tract me for thie paper till morning," Clerk-" Oh, that'eall right, Mr, Brown." Regular Cue- tomer--" But enppeso I was to bo killed between now and to morrow." Clerk. - " Well, the loss would not be much, sir." Customeree"Aren't you afraid to leave all these clothes hanging out on the sidewalk with nobody to watob them? I ehonld think you would be afraid somebody would steal teem." Dealer-" Shteal dose glothes ? Mein himmel, no I (Confidentially,) Vy, mein friend, I dell tyou, I sell deze glothea so cheap that id doesn't bay to shteal them," A man died the other day who never had but, one love, Don't be inoredulone, girls, Ile fell in love with himself early is life and never fell out again, It ie said on good authority that just be- fore the outbreak of cholera in Toulon the ewallowe suddenly disappeared from tae locality, An officer in ire Beugal C,.valry amid in reference to this that during a cher ora epidemic, in India he had noticed that, theughmany of the dead remained unburied, all of the carrion -eating birds bad die- appeart d, "haveon found religion yet, my friend the Rev, Sam Jones inquired of one of Is hearers. " No," was the reply. " What your occupation, may I ask Y' " I'm a de. tective." " H'm 1" observed the great reviv. alter, " that accounts for it." A new explosive has been invented that le said to be about the 'same as twin brother to an earthquake. The nation doesn't need sure death at a mile and' a quarter half as badly aa it does some sort of a reliable coutrivanea for getting a boy up in the morning. The megaloecope is a new apparatue lately brought to the notice of the Academie des Sciences, It ,e"armed with an inoandee- oent light, end is used to explore the stom- ach, bladder, and other cavities of the body. By its means, an objective lens may bo oar- ried into the cavity and a magnified imago of its interior be obtaiued for the phyeiclan's iuslection, Never Open Your Mouth. except to put something to eat into in, ie an excellent motto for the gossip and the suffer er from catarrh. But while the gossip ie practically incurable, there is no excuse for anyone's suffering longer from catarrh. Dr. Sago's Catarrh Remedy is an unfailing cnre for that offensive disease. It heals the dis- eased membrane, and removes the dull de- pressed sensations whi.h always attend ca- tarrh A short trial of this valuable prepar- ation will make the sufferer feel like a new being. :. The footmen who wait solely upon the Queen of Sweden and her daughter wear a very quaint uniform, o•ineieting of tunic, petticoat and breeahea edged with gold lace. Their attire inoludes a wonderful head- dress, consisting of a kind of embroidered skull -cap from which arises three ostrich feathers, none of whichie leas than three feet high, Don't take that "cocktail in the morn- ing." If you have a " swelled head," nause- ated stomach, and unstrung nerves result- ing from the "convivial party last night." The euro and safe way, to clear the cob- webs from the brain, recover zest for food, and tone up the nervous. system, is to use Dr. Pierce's "Pleasant Purgative Pellets." Sold by all druggiste. The Manchester Gallery of .Paintings is to be lighted with e'ectricity. The only reliable cure for catarrh is Dr. Sage's Catarrh Remedy. Ex•Preeident .Arthur is a0 bothered by persons who request him to sign all aorta of documents and petitions that he has made it his ruler, as a matter of self protection and in justice to every one, not to sign any petition. Though the Boil of Virginia grows the best tobacco leaf in the world, it dose not all grow *quad qualities. The produotion even of adjoining counties is often quite different, the one producing leaf which at once deteriorates if grown in the other. The leaf of the "Myrtle Navy " is the pro- duct of the choice sectione of the State. which, through some combination of local influence, produce"a better quality than any others. This is shown by its always com- manding a higher price than any other emoking leaf. Extinguishing a lamp is like a small sup- per ; it is a light blow-out. A CURE FOR DRUNKENNESS -Opium, morphine and kindred habits. Valuable treatise sent free• The medicine may be given in tea or coffee, without the know- ledge of the person taking it, if no desired. Send two 3c, stamps for fullparticulara and testimonials of those who have been cared Address M. V. Luban, agency, 47 Wel- lington cbreot eaat, Toronto, Canada. The daughters of a millionaire always have fine figures. Imperial Cough Drops will give Positive ane Instant Relief to those suffering from Colde, Hoarseness, Sore Throat, etc., and are invaluable to mestere and vooallate. For eel° by druggists and oonfeotioners, R, & T. W A T S O N, Manufacturers, Toronto, A.P.257 _ FOR BALK- SEVERAL Flltar • CLANS 17 PROVED Farms -easy terms of payment. 0 G. MARTEN, Leamington, eex County. � ATENT RIGHT FOR SALE -LAMP GLASS cleaner and dish washer combined ; patented Sept, tuber, 1886; send 25c, for sample and particu- tare. JN O. W CO ^ EY. Box 85, Ampler, Ont T 1 OiiR NADA , AD hRESS AND ., EN CENTS. mailed Beegougb's b) rth td ,., .. dullness I netitute Toronto, will b, g ,py r .ntapolitarn Shorthander, beet journal li Aga 'd a. .._co, $1.00. Send for Calendar. 11/1I AC HI N E RY FOR SALE ENGINES AND LV'. Boilers, Saw and Shingle Mills, Planing Fac- tory Outfits. Stave and Beading Machines, Water. wheels, Chopping Mille, etc. sena for doeorlptive catalogue, and mention what you want. (Mention this paper.) H. W. PETRIE, Brantford, Ont. ALCEN'S. ENtItA ItaFINED CIDER -Bar. role, Halt Barrels and Kegs always in stook, Allen's Clarified Older, prepared especially for Soots Aet counties. Orders promptly ivied; alsocaehpald for common older. Antnx's Vu,soAa Woaxe, Nor. wloh, Ont. ii-- GIA?ICA INFLAMMATORY I611IEi71LA. 1 TIa;d, bout, Neuralgia, and Lumbago eCeetu- ally cured by a remedy invented by one who was bim- eeil cured by it after being three years on crutches with sciatica; abundant testimonials aetpirebone. Solan effects in above•mentloned dierales• remedy expressed to Any addreee, S. J. Lano4araa, Petrelta, Ont. tk SUOOESS AGAINST ALL 3REEJIIL40E 'R 1111atna' Ere Water hat proved Itself i .notes; '411 who hart used It according to directions U their eyes were curable, as so will be on be the nnderalgned certificate'. It cured me, 8 years blind, 000nliat Wed, 0. Fortin; It bas ental me, oeoullet would hot try me, Alexander Wend 6 years b end, Chas. Amiott ; 4 years, Elle Dntonr; 33 years blind and now I see, John Leernit. Ask your dengglets ter it. Wholesale -.Ly Aman Sons & 0o., 384 St, Pani St., Montreal. BIO OFFER Tn introdnoeeb•+n',w win GrvE away i,000 Solf•Opereting Waabing Ma ohiaee. 11 you war i one send us loin uses P 0. and exereeaoflioo atones. THENATIOISALCO, 23De St, N.1t R r fla*itTfut 'OOlored Deeigntl o! FIOWrvs, Blyde, Anlntals nice petite,, o" nutlap (0lothi to be worked in rage, yarn, &a. Wholesale and retail. Large dt,Count to dealt rs and Agents Send to manufacture tor catalogue. 11. AV. DOSS, Guelph, Ont, AGENTS W ,NTMI FOR THE REST SRLL. INV Patented article to ouuudo today. Send 25 cents for Sample and Agents' Teetne. 1)novc l0 & 00, Guelph, JAMES L'AffK & SON Pork Packers, Toronto, L. 0. Thum, Rolled Spice Bacon 0. 0. Baocn, Glasgow Beot Hams, Sugar Cured Ham, Dried Beet, Br met Biome Smoked Tongues, I4eee Pori Pickled engeoe, Cheese, Family or Navy Pork Lard in Tubs and Pails. Tbc Beat Braude O1 Bah Fine Dairy $alt in Steck $CDS PYaita 3,6,E+1'1,r sJ wxzt. --Poi ONLY.*— Clapperthcla Spool Cotton Warranted PULL Length, and to rue smooth au an s'wtnc maobine. Bee that Onarrlaxos'e name In Me label. Oar Tor aale tar .1 lea.v.l nod,11,,,,nrri TO PRINTERS. FOUR (4) FIRST-CLASS COTTRELL POWER Presses For Salo, for rand or ,teem power. Pelting only to make way for teeter presses. S, FRANK WILSON, "TRUTH" OFFICE, Toapn u, on. Free Lands and Cheap domes FOR TRIC MILLION Along the line of the Chicago and Northwestern tlallwnv in Central D,kota ..red Northern Nebraska. New emotion, are Maine opened up and rapidly eettled in thee() Wonderfully ;-raaeetive regions, and the " Seat owners" will have "Brat choice '• of location For full information (which will be sent you free of obarge)about the free lands and cheap homes, apply to JOHN II, MORLEY, Western Caaadlap Pass. Agent, 0. ei N. W. R., 0 York St , Toronto, Ont. R. S.HAIR, General Pass. Agent, 0111lam Ica Allam Mine Royal Mail Steamshrpsr Sailing during winter from Port an every huraday, and MAW: eras, Saturday to 1" iverpo'O, and in Hummer from Queb neve y arurday to L varpo'1, a till"¢ a' L' n- doadarry to land mala a d paPeencore for Scotland and Irel nd. Also from B.ltlmore, via Er all tax and St.Jobn'e, N. F., to Liverpool lortetvht.y during ammo, moa h., The Pteooars l the G'aseow 11 ee Lail daring aviator to and t on, Halifax, Par I.nd, Boston and Phi,adel- ph e; and during Homme. b'tweon Glasgow a, d Mon- treal, we kly, G,e' ow and Beaton, weekly; andGlas- gow and Phllad di hi •, favtniently. For freight, passage, ^r other information apply to A. 8chuoa•oner & Co.. Baltimore • d. Cunard & Co.. H„lifax • ihea & Co , St, John's, N. F,. Wm. Thomson & t o., St. Joan, N. B ; .Allan & Co., Ch sago; Love &, Alden, New York; H. Bourlier, Toronto; Allan,, Rae&Co., Qasbeo• Wm. Brooke, Philadelphia; n, A. Allan. Po'tlund. Boston, Montratl, C1IRISTMM144 CADS BY MAIL At loes than Wholesale Prices. Ail well assorted. No two alike. Postage prepaid. BIRTHDAY CARDS may be included. Nor FRINGED, FRrSGTD, 25 CARDS, good value, for S 25 $1 50. 25 " larger, " re 2.26, 25 " very fine, " 1.00 8 25. $ay Orders may bo proportionately mixed. Cash to accompany order. Address, Matthews Bros. & Co., Toronto CAUTION. EACH PLUG OF THE 1VIYRTLE NAVY IS MARRED B. IN BRONZED LITTERS. NONE0�- 1'.1 w' YR G N'J NEI UUT 1�.rraJ° 0 The New Co -Operative lewillg adios --ARE TI-IB— BEST IN THE MARKET,, 18ZW STAW581 NZW IT 13111a 1 Latest Improved A iachments Agents price for similar machine SO ) Our price only $25 each. Before buying send to stamp for our slogans Deets. graph and sample of sewing. Ird' Machines guaranteed for three rears and ..Mt OR Ictal, Any lad wantin a machine will do wen so gene TU 0O'OP1ERA,TI'® Sowing iachine Co.. vs r a risme °T. Bn'UTre sf seArr,TtiN, HOWARD IRON WORKS, - BUFFALO, N.Y. PAPER MCACTUTER S AND BOOKBINDERS' MACHINERY. —SEND FOR CATAGOGUE— J. I. VIVIAN, AG'T FOR CANADA 27 & 29 ADELAIDE ST. EAST, TORONTO, ONT. 2 R. nay ez Co. rir® olvto,a LIQUIDATION SALE. Owing to the failing health of tee senior member of our firm we have been abandon the contemplated oonttunanoe of the business. The manufacturing premises, maohinery, &c., have already been sold. The entii e stook of furniture, upholstering material, &c., amounting to over $80,000,4 must be disposed of as speedily as possible, Tho furniture is all our own manufacture, and the reputation earned by the fire during the last 5(1 years is a sufficient guarantee of its quality. The liquidation being peremptory, dealers and the general public are now afforded emit an opportunity as has never occurred heretofore in Canada, obliged is Toronto, 12th Nov., 1855. •MERIDEN BRITANNIA OOMPH 'Y FINEST Electro Plate CAUTION Goods stamped Merl' den Silver Plate Co., are not our rimae. yon want reliable goods insist on getting thope made by the ERIDEN BRITAN- NIA CO., HAMILTON • , ONT. Important to All' Who Desire More Light THE HARVr Y "SAFETY JAMP" le superior to every other domeetio lkht used, troy excerrere ase. This is a Central Draught Burner in owes newts in various erne. mental deeigne on metal and giaee stands. It consumes but half the quantity of oil that the eo•called electric lamp Hees It le the brighteet oil lamp ever invented. Menutacturore also of the "Solar Star Lamp " in Braes and Nichol. Thin lamp took Fnsr Pima end Smvaa Mane at Toronto', Industrial Exhibition, 1885. IIARveY Sderty LA•ni~.-We have teen favored with a 'low of fb', , orb pe rol, um light, nod we are etronply oonvineed of ite,superiot-_..-`-, Ily as a ooai oil kn•rer over any lamp yet placed on the ded market, Theair dumber in which the wtcireta eaepenhe., emirs. thecitar permitting a o„nvaant circulation of an. d,waward around the Wok -we, the, co nneard tbrtuoh the a'ok•ea,e, thin giving a cireot the oil, s emelt h• b Bo o grim rarer u18•1 pt the hr aggoh to 51la 6 ler hoed fvOtok lamp is cot etn etta up00 tborcugbty parities! and PotenH& on olpioe, and the re tint attained lea oee'nefut eon. white light, which for oonno- my, brililency and Ptoadineee it not surpassed by either gee or eke. Woltz -.tlyrento Truth, tF O6rreepabdoneo with &alert, and ln•heetion Invited, OPFIOE.I:9Adelaide St. West, Toronto 3 e1 V Y &