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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Wingham Times, 1899-12-08, Page 21 strAxia s you, e•sesi.ler this a k4W-So, dear baron. you. are just A. Long Lifer, Thus tlmt the Itgrou saw. The Rate Pt Fuer Itetherford. wit? Immo down from the mountains. What , Dv Jou x.fiicom -Yes, -sir: we are very proud lovely views gt t there, do you not? Herr Bard -Most Matter -Suppose 1 tell you that 1 saw She --.And what delicious water they • filo wilfin the wtils today. give you to Clink there! Warden,-Yeu 41i(11 Baren-Ach, yes. DM also haf seem -Punch. . _ Pr. Low'* vVorm serup Is death to the worms every .time, safe for the child and pleasant to take. In- sist on getting "Dr. Lowls" and accept no substitute. Price o. Baeon-Why doesn't this man Agui- ld. on It vve s a ile of pritxm..e.s gthrtt» brealdast -Chicago News. • CARTERS tiaBld.b) s!ratee thebymuie? that't OTTELE 1V7 Js ti ritlEAG • 1.Z Positively cured by these Little Pills. 'They aiso relieve Distress from Dyspepsia, indigestion and To Hearty Eating. A per. feet remedy for Dizziness, Nausea, Drovid- LC'n, rzrd Test Muth, Coated Tongue r:»31(1e., TO-AlrD LIVER. They Regulate Vegeiable. email DOS% Small Price. Substitution iho fraud of the day. See you get Carter's, Ask for Carter's, Insist and demand Carter's Little Liver Pills. The three great vital factors of this body of ours are the heart, the nerves andthe blood. It is because of the triple power possessed by Milburn's •Heart and NervePills of making weak, irregular beating hearts strong and steady, toning up run down, shattered, nervous systems and supplying those element- necessary to make thin, w etery blood rieh and red, that so many wonderful' cures have been accredited to this remedy Hero is the ease of Mrs. R. J... Arnold, Woodstock, N.B., •who r,ys "I 7 3 troubled for some time w{ a. nervous prostration aad gekeral weakness, feeling irritable, debilitated and sleep- less nearly all the time. My entire system became run down. As sodn as I began M taking Milburn's Heart and -41 Nerve Pills. I realized that they had a calming, soothing influence upon the nerves. Every dose seemed to help the - eure. They restored my sleep, strengthened my nerves and gave tone to my entire system. ,‘ I think them wonderful." ERYSIPELAS. This dangerous Blood Disease always cured by Burdock Blood Bitters, Most people are aware how serious a disease Erysipelas is. Can't rout it out of the system with ordinary remedies, , Like other dangerous blood diseases, though, B.B.B. can cure it every tine. Read what Rachel Patton, Cape Chin, Bruce Co., Ont., says: wish to state that I used Bur- dock Blood Bitters for Erysipelas hi my face and geoeral run down state of my health. I tried many rem - edits but all failed to cure. I then tried tl./1.13. Two bottles nearly Cure.'v e e bott:.:4; cara2:cte1y cureu ;.. ar Trsele.lifar obtsisted, and all patent conducted for massakre VERN. My ki tht tvestrediese sleirdty of des Patent Ofeloo, I .w fachlties fur searrirg patents are tresarpteread Oodet, a:Welt se Islekogralsit of inyeatter, wit% itre vs toad:V=1U at *lomat!. 4t. tto a..I Qpiflf4ll, ea to the just what he's (Wing. The music in a battle, you knowi aiwuys at ale fear. The animal pert t4 tho superiutea- dent ef Farmers' Institutes has been published. During the year C77 meet - legs were held, 119,-102 persons attended, which is an increase over last year. The niemborrhip in July was 19,08. The most .of the technical portion of the re- port is given over to tho subject of the pro Auction of bacon for the British market. Not Heart Trouble. Coming down on a Euclid car tho other day a man wait a high collar of an old fashioned shape, a gray chin whisker and a derby hat a size too small for him occupied the extreme front seat. He was a nervous man and attracted the at- tention of the passengers on the seat op- posite by his queer starts and grimaces. At Case avenue the car stopped to lot a Wade park car swing by and then started up again with a very unpleasant jerk. When the jerk came, the man on the front seat suddenly slipped his hand in- side his coat, an expression of sharp pain crossed his face, he breathed heavily and seemed to grow pale. An alarmed. and sympathizing man on the opposite seat leaned forward. "Heart trouble?" he anxiously asked. The other man glared at him. "Heart trouble nothing," lie growled.' "1 busted th' point off my lead pencil!" -Cleveland Plain Dealer. The Fears .of the Vulgar. "Have you not read the handwriting on the wall?" criedthe warning voice in terrifying accents. The mall of sin. paled. • "Do yon have reference to my wife's cooking school diploma?" he asked faintly, with ashen lips. • The fears of the vulgar mind, it will be observed, are»moved by the literally concrete rather than the figuratively abstract. -Detroit Journal. PELT NT RPM We build our pumps to last for years and have them in price from $2.50 up. Brass Cylinders and Galvanized Iron Piping. We have a full stock of the above geode. Call and get prices when in need of anything in oar line .110111Ic pErfroii, • Opp. Beattie's Livery TO THE FRONT SEE WHAT THE DIAMOND SHOP opposite Post Office, Says: Fresh Beef and Pork, Lamb • Bologna Pickled Pork • Headcheese Breakfast Bacon Sausage Smoked Elam Pressed Beef Side Pork Tripe Corn Beef Pressed. Tongue Spice Roll, Lard, Fowl, always on hand. Oar prices are right,' Orders called for and meat delivered to any part of the town. • Your patronage solicited. DIAMOND PORE •SUE IT PAYS TO ADVERTISE IN TEE TIMES. • . "CtrANTED-SEVAR AL BRIGHT AND HONERT r 7 parsons to represent us /o.. Phonon in this snd slot. bp mmintle. Stkaty we a teat aud ex,. pima Stsulttitts llorft-5d 0, rpo a, os oe lultury. roolltis pursPi tritst. a , r rtr l4tItiebabk ini ti; Ilk -,r,e. sed a • ,,,,„:1 The Retired Ship -Mast ms' Club of Orhani, Cape Cod, was holding its regn lar evening meeting at the post -office. Tito organization is an entirely informal one, and its sessions are over es soon as the mail is sorted andready for delivery. On this occasion there happened to be a stranger present, the skipper of a trad- ing schooner hailing from Boston. Tits personage had developed. into 1111:1 11111fOlifieent prevaricator. No tale was t o wonderful but that he had one more itSt02114111.1g San. Tho subject under discussion had been the intelligence shown by various pets formerly owned by the old salts -there present, mill pots ranging from rat -ter- riers and pigs to a mongoos and an aut. eater. The stranger bad capped the climax by tailing of a pet boa -constrict- or -"bore coustractor" to called it-- . which he had owned while an a voyage up the Amazon, after rubber. This self-sacrificing reptile, Ben, by name, had saved his master's vessel from destruction at the cost of bis owu life in. the following sensational manner:. The sahooner was moored to the pier when a treraendous storm arcs° which threatened dire devastation. The cables parted, and the frail bark was about to bo dashed against a, sunken tree, 'when Ben, perceiving the danger, trapped his tail around the cepstaiu and, throwing the rest of his body overboard, -took a turn with it around a stump. ori shore, making himself a living hawser. This veracious- narrative terminated with Ben'sdeatb from the effects of 4is. ex,- perieuce; he being stretched from a length of thirty feet to seventy-two and one-half feet. ' . Silence reigned for some minutes -when the stranger had concluded, every one, apparently, trying to swallow his share of the yarn. Then, Ca,ptein Josiah, Deane spoke as follows: •• "That was a •won.derful • snake er yourn, Cap'n, I .don't deny. I know how bad yer muster felt when. be died,. 'cause I felt the same way when I lost my pet turtle. .He was a tremenjous knowin' critter. I'll tell you 'bout him. . "I was on. a v'yage • ter Calcutta in the bark Briar Rose. We'd been out 'haat .forty days when we see two big logger -head turtles asleep on the - top er the water. • Turtles is mighty good eatin', and so we histed out a .boat and went after 'em.- One er 'eri we had ter Arid with an ax, but t'cther one was only stunned, and wheat he was got up on dock he come ter life ag'in. We had enough, turtle meat fer quite a spell so we didn't need for kill him right off,and party soon I wouldn't 'a' killed him, ter no money, lie got ter be such a pet. We mimed him Rutherford, after Ru.thei. ford B. Hayes, who was President then., "Well, sir, yer never see a dumb critter so attaehed to a • human befit' as that turtle was ter me. He'd setside er ma on a hot day and fan me with,his flipper. And nights he used ter put his head» over the aidge er the arapanion- way and sing me ter sleep." "What! sing yer to sleep, Cap'n?" •cried the strangerin surprise. "Why, turtles can't sing!". "Can't, hey?" said Clapta,tn Doane. "Guess yer ain't ranch up in turtle learnin'. Yr read yer Bible and see what it says 'bout the voice er the turtle being' heard in the land. Well; as I was sayin', I loved that turtle like a brother, and when the • Briar Rose sprung a leak and I see we'd have ter abandon her I wa'n't goin' ter leave Rutherford behind ter perish." "Perish! Why, wain't he a sea - turtle?" • "Oourse he was!. Did. yer think he was.a htutunin' 'bird?" • "ButC'n-" • She -Did. 'you. ever whistle for a, , ap "Oh, don't interrupt me. Well, when -Wind? He -Yes, andi got a pretty bad wind be; only don't let ;no see yer kill him,' I• says, 'for voulait't bear it.' 'jest then we heard a kind te7 soh, and, Wallin' round, we see "Rutherford etandin• on tine aidge er tho raft with the tears running down his face. He'd heard every worcl, and, would. yr blieve it, that critter tuulerstoodi "Well, sir, 'twas pitiful! Ho looked at me so ma fer a minute, so reproach. and then he flung up his flippers and jumped overboard. Yes, eir 1 that poor, heart broken' critter committed snicide-drowned 'Amen 'eause I was so ongrateful as ter think or °atilt' him." Captain Doane finished his recital and _wiped his oyes. The skipper of the trading echooner regarded, him for some moments with a most puzzlod express- ion; then he said: "Ho drowned yer say, Cap'n.?" "Well, wa'n't he a reglar salt -water turtle?" "Saran." "Lived in tlui sea always, dian't he?" "Sure; did yer think he lived in a tree, or a swell -front house?" "Well, btit--Why, 1 say,--but-con- found it, fellers -why -I" Ho turned to the other old salts near him. Not a vestige of expression was on their wooden countenances, He gazed at the assembly for a few moments, scratched his head, muttered something about "seein' if the mail was ready," and departed. And then Captain Josiah Doane treat- ed the members of the Retired Ship - Masters' Club to a most portentous wink.--Saturclay gvening Post. Chi.idreil 'Cry for CAST R 1 A correspondent of a western paper an.qtin'es as to the origin of the phraie, "Ho isn't in it." The editor replies that it was first used by the editor, who died and went to heaven and loolied for the man who took his' paper and then re- fused to nay for it; • - "I get tired running in the same old rut;" said the clock,•''so I frequently go on ,striice." "Yes," said the wall paper, "and' I notice that whenever you do so you. come out of it more run dow-n.. than. ever." At this the chagrined piece of mechanism followed its usual custom and covered» its face with its hands.' The following remarkable physiolo- gical statement occurred in the • exami- nation papers Of a school..boy:-"The human. body is divided into three parts -the head, the chist'and the stummick. The head contains the eyes and, brains, if any. The chist contains the lungs and, a piece of the liver. The stummick is 'devoted to the bowls, of 'which there is Aire, a, e, o, u, and sometimes and y." . Anian named Green has perfected an inkIess printing process, and will soon startle the commeroial and literary world 1.2Y printing a newspaper without •ink of any description. That the new process will revolutionize the printing business 'goes without saying: Tho modus operandi,- as far . as known,, is that a Chemically prepared liaper is used and that any ordinary press can be ar- ranged for 'the -hiltless process, by leaving off the rollers and all movable parts of the inking arrangements; a a sheet of thin zinc around the cylinder as a con- ductor; cOnneatthe negative and posi- tive pales; turn' on the electrical cur- rent; and presto, it is ready for work. Street cars without horses. Telegraphy without wires. Printing without What next? the men found Rltherford was goin' ter be took they muffnied and went off with the boats, leavin.' ' me and Rutherford and the first mate on board. The mate and MG rigged' a raft, and the! three er us got on it jest as the, poor old Briar Rose went down. "We didn't have no grub ter speak er, and what we had we eat up soon. We was lucky enough ter have plenty er water with us, but pretty soon we was starvin.' Then the mate, he says ter me, says he: 'I hate ter de it, Cap'n, but we'll have ter kill Rutherford and eat him.' "1 nouldn't hear er it, and we 'went fer a couple er days more. The the mate he went at rue ag'in, till finally I says: " 'Well,' I says, '1 s'pose it'll have ter CANADIAN PACIFIC R'Y 141.41.1.4AWAy IMPROVED TRAIN SERVICE. *READ EAST,WEST, DOWN. DP, M. A. M. 2.30 6.26 Teeswater 4. 2.0114 1'.1.510 8.00 6.53 Witigharn 1.82 10.43 4.00 7.45 Ilarriston 12.35 9.48 4,22 8.05 Mount orest .12.10 0.25 4.67 8.3g Arthur 11,35 8,50 .„„„i 0.2g 8.5 Grina vituoy. 11.10 846 au.u. the tragedian shouted, "Rubber!" 8 80 11 36 Toronto 8 26 6 40 too. ' She -Well, perhaps it was pretty bad whistle. • • The Groom -Now, let me see # I've remembered everybody'. There's 310 for the minister, 35 for the detective, 31 each for the policemen, 31 for the coach- man -- The )Iride-Good graciceni, 'Will! Yon.'ve forgotten the best man. • CASTOR IA For infants and Children. ThetasItl�& lignitut Of • • Ati 311 41:4e eT'T/ • Iutlyt• Mrs. Plum -What an honest face your bo3r bee I Glunt-,-.Don't say' that, Why not? Why, the conductor May hear you, and he'll charge me full fare for him. Sue Brette-The tragedian made a bit last night. Peet Lighte-Xndeed I Yes; in the banquet scene, when he starts to carve the property duck, two fellows stood 'ap in the orchestra and tried to see what he was' working en, • 4 • • ie. T. G. & B. tc; stet from. "k otergairine AGENTS WANTED- POE. "Tlf# WS AND PINIMIMMIRMAMAkzeil.d.P.:',:4, 4,6114 a 41111111102MINMPRIO . • lhaltnaltrr11171;111101011MISIOP irlissarawne •-• I • , - • eociablePreparationforAs- 401404 illelbodandReguls- •mug the StataCits andBoweis of SEE THAT THE FAC -5! SteJNATURE , • •••••••••*••••••, PromotesDigestiongheerful- nessandRest,Containsneither OpitintMorplting nor Mineral. IQT JiBCOTIC. -71ta;eottliThliel' 1012ZP111=12 ,Pumpkin &a- -dui= Seed # Iratu;n47roz- v. ' cf..ftiggig;;. Aperfect Remedy Tor Constipa- tion, Sour Stomach,Diarrhoes. Worms ,Convulsions,Feverish- umss endLoss or SLEEP. TaeSiraile Signature of NEW IS ON THE WRAPPER OF Miff BOTTLE Or 1 C;astoria is put n2 in ene-sizo bottles only. It is not sold in bulk, Don't allow anyone so sell, you anything else on the ilea or promise that it is "just as good" and 'will answer every pur. pose." ACfr Soo that yon get 0 -A -S -T -0 -R -I -A. he 1 paiio- LEX/0:C:475.0P33:0?• ,-,• 6ziede.P .e-W.C•titaleitiMIEVINEMER . Ida .1illeiR il i EAK, N ERVO USA DISEASED MEN. Thousands of Young and Itfirldte Aged Men aro annually swept to a premature grave through car y, indiscretion and later excesses. Self abase and Constitutional Blood Diseases have ruined and wrecked the life of many a promising young man. Rave you ;' Ener • y and Strength. Our New MAllsod Treatment.will build you up men.tally, physically the Face_,_. Dreams and Drains at Night; Restless; Haggard. Looking; Blotches; Sore any of the fo lowing Symptoms: Nervous and Despondent; Tired in Morning; No Ambi- aon,_• Memory Poor; Easily Fatigued; Exeitable and Irritable: Eyes Blur; Pimples on Throat; Hair Loose; Pains in Body; Sunken Eyes Lifeless; Distrustful and Lack of Done. c., and sexually. Chn,, l'•-“:ArPon. Read What DRS. KENNEDY 86 KERGave • 1. • V is on w'r7 0_n..ia, on )11.1"11 Dr. Moniton. "At 14 years of ago I learned a bad habit which almost rained me. I became nervous and weak. My back troubled me. I could stand no exertion. Head and eyes became dull. Dreams and drains at night weakened me. I tried seven Medical Firms, Elec- tric belts, Patent Medicines and Family Doctors. They gave me no help. A Mend advised me to try Drs. Kennedy & Kergan. They sent me ono month's treatment and it cured mo. I could. feel myself gaining every day. Their New Method Treatment cures when all else fails." They have cared many of my friends." ETARAITELD IOU OEM ( " sOme 8 years ago I contracted t serious constitutional bioo 'disease. 1 went to Bet Springs to treat for syphilis. Memory aim t -3 killed mo. After a while the symptoms again appeared. T oat became sore, pains in limbs, pimples on face, blotches, ey s red, loss of hair, glands enlarged, etc. A medical friend, ads.fiod, Dces, Kermedt & Kergan's New Method Treatment. It mired me, and I have had no symptoms for live years. I am married and he ppy. As a pro doctor, I heartily recomend it to all who have this terrible disease - Curcio. igghtlte." at will eradicate the poison from» the blood." • • Capt. rnwasentl. 15 YEARS IN DETROIT.I50,000 CURED: „I ilt 7 Liu.ttst neYer fails in curing Diseases of men. Our New Method Treatment It strengthens the body, stops all drAins and losses, purifies the blood, clears the brain, builds up the nervous and sexual. systems and restores lost -vitality to the body. . we Guarantee to Cure Nervous Debility, Vatting Manhood, t43TP1111,1s.vartecieele. Ayr:entre, Gloat, Unnatural Unsentartres, Weak :Putts and Ali Kidney- and Bladder niseases. R E EmBEDAnionc.- They guarantee atroeeth 0 olroVoinps• "i'! eir rop- tation and fifteen years of business aro at stake. Ton, run no riak. Write them for an honest opinion, no matter who treated you. It May save you years of regret and suffering.. , Charges reasonable. Write for a Question List mid Rook Free. Consultation Free. DRS. KENNEDY &KEIFIGA.. RI4S Shelby St "I am 83 years oE age, and married. When young I led a. gay life. Early indiscretions and later excesses,,mado trouble for me. I became weak and nervous. • My kidneys became affected and I feared Bright's disease. Married lif , was unsatis- factory and my home unhappy. I.tried everything -all failed till I took treatment from Drs. Kennedy and Korgan. Their Nsw. Method built me up mentally, physically and sexually. 1 fool and act like a man m every respect. Try them." fOr No Names Used Without Written Consent of Patient. Detroit, • I, • ,,,, ••.-».»».' , " MONEY'S ONEY Any man who -wears the J. D. King Co.'s x S'hib Proof Rubbers 4% 1,1 makes money -money , 7 , ,,,T.;e:,,,,... rocsIth.at -will jingle in his pocket, ,---' - . r 1,,,-,-) i - AN .,..0 Search the world over and. you, : ..--soe T..% ''-k.; • ..41 will find. nothing better than Stdi .- - .$' • ',0> A ,..1 • ; ' .. . •r:. '.‘ ::,-... :.,...a3-..„ Proof Rubbers, because •.. ... • : n - . , ••••......--- t '‘.' ,.4. -.. '..::!1-0, •'''''"---, there is nothing better. 1fi'7.";V:',Y.:;.,*--.1,-5-s-i, ..... (-I° Any pritressive dealer can tell you all about Stub P1.4004 if not, write to the J. D. King Co., and, they will tell you. ' % You can't afford to 'be without them, because they are the best. See that Stub Proof is STAMPED Ott the bottom of each. shoe. The J. D. :taxa CO, Limited, Toronto, Montreal. Winnipeg. • he 'limes, $1.00_ Mihieveusenis of dratted Devrev. the w °Hal /I lly Mar l• Or nn ThrOtigh. Bedstead the ife. on trains thrliv.6 J1c E, VTM.AN, jauttary isty.190L GLOB-, 31.35 till :au. ktUraribenw.‘1. • , 1