The Wingham Times, 1897-09-17, Page 3THE \VINGUUAM TIMES, SEPTEMBER 17, ii307.
The Way It Was Spelled. Wrong Conclusion.
A. lady who buys provisions regu-
larly
egu- The Canadian Gazette tells an
VI
11 f dealer Boston
a amusing' story of, one who was too
aur y puzzled
a c cater in oson was wale]: at drawing an inference. It
little uzzled aver one Theof the itemsahappened that a Glasgow professor
in her monthly bill. item was who was visiting Canada with the
as follows; �I3ritish AssoGiat}on in 1884, was de -
1 " To ;3 lbs, psatltnon, 7s Gds a I sirous of seeing so nothing of North•
i d �� It suddenly occurred tel. the tally .
I western life. and for this purpose
d.> I i
1 that sumo haul purchased three lbs. of repaired to an Plberta ranch.
salmon on the elate given, and the i I fixed hien u as well as I could,
meaning of the mysteriously spoUed'tbe rancher says, but he complained
word was apparent to her• i that ho did not like'sleeping with.
are )ausileo
Gm•eattty°a.lnused, and feeling well his +tilothes on. Sn after the first
_... ___. _ ! enough ltequainted with the pray}s- i night. I stretched a cow skin across
ion dealer to tell him of the little the s1 stic and told him in might
Tfh� �'e� I� a a oda lett;]] sho had enjoyed at ]tis ea* !undress if he lilted, lie tools off
i pease, she said, when she went to , Inose of his garments, and put on a
O l 1 ft I _ _ -1 pay the bill : i long white night dress. Iu the
„ nr.. 7]an.,a. 7 hmA nna+n n. lunch ; over the way some one in : �' o
ing may foreman came in while
gentleman was still sleeping.
ALL
Caiiviiicd1
establishment spells ` salmon.
1 When the item had been pointed
out to him, Mr. Blank said, in a tone
!of contempt for such ignorance :
That's the work of a new book-
- I have. I'm ashamed to have
I such bills sent out, and I shall have
1 LL TES L FY to speak to hint about it, Ile is a =Then what's he wearin' them
good book ]teepee, but he's g'.t to b'iled clothes for ?" was the reply.
learn to spell if he stays in my em -
"Never saw a chap laid ont in b'iled
clothes afore, 'cept he were dead,"
Observing the white night-dress, he
said in a whisper:
Iiather sudden, eh ?"
" What," I asked.
" The death of the old mart."
" Fie', not dead , he's asleep," I
explained.
That Winyah has kept
the People acid ii
HS
i ploy. Let nae correct the byfl.'
aith with Taking a pen, Mr, Ink drew
several lines across the".' word, and
de good wrote above it :
His Remedies are becoming the
Sslfegu.rd of the home. Tho pl-
ple have Trusted and have
not bean decioverl.
I " Sarnmon."
" There, • lna'ain;" he said, corn=
placently, handing back the bill.
" I'll teach than book-keeper how to
"Five years ago 1 was very sink, and.
TEUJE TO THE LAST
The History of Five Years and Its
Happy' Outcome.
Story of Joe Jefferson.
At the sixth anneal meeting and
dinner of the, Old Colony Club- at the
Vineyard Sound House, Falmouth.
Heights, Joe Jefferson presloed and
opened the proceedings with the fol-
lowing story:
" The worthy captain has just
told roc that it is useless to expect of ,
him a speech, bat that if he wet e
walking the quarterdeck of a ship
he wt.uld know where he was,
Now, that is where he greatly differs ;
from myself. When I ate walking
the quarterdeck of a ship I do net in
the ]east know where I am. I am
reminded of what once occurred to
mo. I was erossiug the Atlantic,
The weather teas dreadful, Captain!
Ashley knows what that. means. I 1
was trying to guide myself along
the deck, and incidentally, to vid
others. In this mission I ran across ,
at lady lying prostrated on the deck,
evidently sorely troubled with that
dreadful disease, seasickness.
"I said to her, ' Madame, may I
bring you anything to relieve you?'
" She looked up at Inc and feebly
said : ' I beg you will not mention
it, Will you also Ich:dly excuse 01e,
sir?'
"I then said to her : ' But is their
nothing I can do fur you?'
"' No, sir,' said she in
tune. ' Please go 0why.'
"' But, madame, I said,
evidently suffering. Can
ing to help you?'
"I wish,' said she, 'that you
would go away. I ate nut tit to see
anyone.'
" 'I ant sorry, madame,' I per.
siste 1, ' that I caul be of no little ser*
vice. Can. 1 do nothing for s our
poor husband, the gentleman where
head I see in your lap?'
Oh,' said she, ' that is not uty,
husband. I do not knuw in the
least who he is.' "
spell ' salmon'when he conies in, or
tell hint to- find a new place."—Tit-
Bits.
HEART HOPE.
ntIESD IN AN IN3rANT AFrslr THE USE of DR.
AGN'EW'S CUA. NUR TIIE HEART --A POTENT
LRAM) REMEDY—AND NO CASEToo niers FOB
Mrs, Mary Moss. No. 2ti Chestnut St., I3taisneUT11t1;Ln? AND CERTAIN CURE.
Torous ), Canada, satyr;—"1 have used _,
Munyon's Dyspepsia Cure with splendid
"For fifteenears I was agrcat sufferer
results. I was 60 bad with this disease from heart disease, e.11 this wi•ile I was in
that food would lie for hours on my
the hands of one of bur best physicians,
stomach causing me great pain andfront whom the only encouragement I
agony. I also had bevel.° patens in my
could get was that I was liable to dropoff
heart and was frequently trouoled with
at Any moment. I hail many times ead
sour stomach. I heti to be extremely of cures made by 1)r. Agnew's Cure for the
careful what I ate; but after using one heart. Was induced try a bottle of this
bottle of :Viunyon's Dyspepsia Colo 1 clue, and to my surprise the very first
am now able to eat anything with°:^ -t dosegave me immediate relief. I felt en -
distress afterwards. Afterfter suffering for eoura ed and persisted. Before the filet
years with this disease it is a pleasure to
be able to eat anything I desire. Thanksbattle was taken the dropsy, whin!) had
sorely troubled mo, had disappeared, and
to Muayon." when I had completed my second bottle I
felt ai well ms I ho i ever four." Mrs. John
Munyon's Ito;Ienruatism Cure srld.,'u
t arms to relieve in one to theca hoarsen A. Junes, Willa tom—Sold at 'Chishohn's
Drug Store.
' cures in a few day.:. Price 25J.
• Munyon's Dyspepsia Cure pusitivoly
cures all forms of indiges'ion and stom-
ach trouble. Price 35u. .
Munyon's Cold Oure preveuts pneu-
monia and b:cults up a cold in a few
hours. Price, 25u.
Munyon's Cough Cure stops sou„ hs,
night sweats, allays „orooesa, and speodi
ly heals the lungs. Price, 25o.
Munyon's Kidney (lure speedily aures.
pains in the back, loins or groins and all
forms of kidney disease. Pi ice 23e.
,Y
n s Headache Cure
stops h
ead-
,
ache in three minute:). Price>ac. and the glace is the thin covering
Munyon'e Pile Ointment p Ritivbly Of -CI' the seed. The fruit is about
cures all 1',rrms of piles. Price, 25e. i
the size of a peach. When ripe it
Munyon's Blood Oure eradicates. all
imt>ur lies of the oruu 1. Plisse, 25o. breaks open and shows the little nut
M teyon's Female Remedies area inside, The trees grow on the
hey bear fruit 70 or 80 years, ]lav
3 minutes and caro panwanontly. F rico,' iiie fruit upon them all the season.
$1-a
Munyon's Catarrh Remedies never a V line tree in Jamaica is said to
fail. The Catarrh Cure -price 25e.— I have over 4,000 nutmegs on it every
eratl'eates the disease from the system, I .,ear.
and the Catarrh Tablets—price 25a.— i "
1 The Dutch used to have all this
cleanse turd heal the parts.
Mnnyon'a',terve Cure is a wonderful 1 nutmeg trade, as they owned the
How Nutmegs Grow.
Nutmegs grow on Rale trees,.
which look like small pear trees, and
which are generally not over twenty
foot high. The flowers are very
1:rzch like lilies of the valley, They
are pale in color and very fragrant.
The nutmeg is the seed of the fruit,
have remained in a feeble condition ever
since. During the time 1 bad hemmor-
hage of the stomach which left ' me ?ku
the poorest condition possible. My
heart and nerves were weak, consequent-
ly I suffered from extreme nervousness
violent fluttering of the heart, weak
sinking feellicg, shortness of the breath
numbness in the hands etc.
A short titne ago I was advised to try
Milburn's Heart and Nerve Pills and
went to John A. Barr's drug store to get
a box. On obtaining thein I commenced
their use, and derived Eo n.uoh benefit
i.nat Icontinued using them. I bad
now taken a little over three boxes and
am pleased to say they have improved
my general health. strengthened the en-
tire nervous system, and removed my
heart troubles. I do not now have the
fluttering of the heart, weak sinking
feeling, or shortness of the breath. They
have restored healthy:circulation of the
blood, and removed the numbness from
coy hands. 1 am far better than I have
been since I took sick, and it is with
pleasure that I recommend the use of
these pills to anyone suffering as 1 did
from heart or nerve trouble. (Signed)
James lielley, shoemaker, 75 York -street
Hamilton, Ont.'
Mr. Kelley is one of the moat popular
and respected business men in Hamilton
having been 24 years engaged m hie
present occupation in that city.
boon to all women. islands of Asia and tropical Atuel le 1.
Munyon's Asthma Remedies reli?v a in ,r,
nerve tonic. Price, 25c. 1 Rands Islands and conquered all the
flunyon'syi
its zer re3t 0
1los est vigor Price other traders and destroyed the trees. en
• ► $1. To kpriceu , they
A separate cute for each r disease. At n the n
all druggists, mostly 25c. a vial. 1 r 1 �.1CG burnt three piles of nutmegs,
Personal letters to Prof. Munson,
Albert at., Toronto, answered with
tree tnediaal advice for 'iny disease
Ireland is likely to be visited by
famine the coming winter, as the
potatoes are nearly all destroyed by
blight and the heavy rain's have
ruined tile oats and other crops. leonntl'it s.
Some one has employed a leisure • ._..._..---,-
hour in an enquiry as to the propos- Por Over Fifty Years.
denote use of letters in the printing
Hamilton, Ont.
Messrs. T.:1 Milburn & Co., Toronto.
Gentlemen ,-1 have taken Milburn's
Heart and terve Pills, for nervous debil-
ity and insomnia of long standing, and
consider them by far the best remedy
I know of. Tlioy have done moil goo;]
deal of goud, restoring my nerves to
their abnormal condition, thereby enabl-
ing me to get restful sleep. (Signed)
Mrs. Susan 0. y@)Odhouee, 81 Smith -
avenue, Ilatuilt'aSp, Ont.
1,axa Livor Pill.; cure constipation, bil-
liousness, and sick headache. 25c.
1ch of which .� t acid to bo 'r ars
big as a church." Nature did not
sympathize with such measures. The
nutmeg pigeon, found in- all the
Indian Islands, did for •the world'
what the Datch intended should not
be Bono—carried the seed, vt hien are
their food, into the surrounding
user A'N (OLD AND w1r•t-•rRIED REMEDY—
of a 11etV;;,apeC. The i'c . It is as ` hues. Wihslow's Soothing Syrup leas
follows:—o, 1,000; t, 750; a, 7'28; I, been utted for over fifty years by mil -
704• .4, 630; o, 67:); n. 670; ll, 540; r, lionst)f mothers kr their children while
fi 3.. d,6i) 1, `n'i t u, 2rn'. c, 280; in,
teothang,wittl perfeetsuccess. It, soothes
18 and g, the child, softens the gaols, allays all
272; f,236;�w, 190; y, a.p pain, cures wind colic, and is the best
168 b, 158; v, 120; k, 88; j, 55; q, 50 tenledy for diarrhoea. Is ploaeant to
the taste, Sold by drnggists in every
Yt, 46; z, 22. art of the world Twenty-five rents a
Good Boat.
A. old colored man who runs the
little ferry across the New England were ttuaeng 'the rich men of the
river, affords much entertainment to tow_.rll,air.cey 1i. A, pt tv.
passengers by his quaint remarks,
Not hong ago a farmer, who had Muddy tiles—S') 13i11 has kil'ed
driven onto the boat with a heavy hisself. Wat was th' reost'n? Wo+k?
load of summer boarders, said, Raggedr;Pohlner—Yelp. lie had
"Thiele Rate, e t ^sin year pulley the artl'tnn, and Lite bl•t:sti,i ig gr t
contrivance should give out, where labs,. �•d. -
do you c:tlgtitltc we'd go ?'' —�
"Stayright in the boat," returned
the ferryman.
roan.
the -sante
t.n ase
1 (it, iuth-
COULDN'T WRITiiI HIS NAME.
NERVES SIIAITER1ID--BUSINESS GONE—OCPN
coNn—A PM:SIO.IL WIINCII—RESTO'tED C •3I•
PLi'rELY DY SMITH AMERICAN NE1iV1N]?.
u111111eyt111111U11g11111111ISSI ISSI MISSI111111111ISMIi
8
Til T THE
I'
11
"Two years ago,I was completely pros-
trated wall ner\005 debility. I was com-
pletely wrecked that 1 had to quit business
I tried btetphysI ,nuc and numerous treat-
ments and hrrin at eta y medicines with
no relief. Reading' u.stimoniats of won-
derful cures being t if. cted by South Ameri-
oan Nervine, I dcoided to give It a trial.
Before I had taken half a bottle I received
great IIOlatit. 1 ht. ve *taken several bottles
and feel justifi •i i" a rating that it is a
wotrdel fol m a:e•u� . Before taking it my
nerves were so bull shattered, I could not
sign coy name le€ib y. I feel that two
much cannot be sa 0 in praise of it." E.
Errett. ]lien] izkvi.h., Ont. Sold at Chis-
hohn's Diug rit.,re.
e bad
h
Ikactrll.inielDrew
when
$1'9,000.'..0O, and he died in debt. I
knew a gentlett•an who at one time
bad )"8000,0010 in the bank who is
flocs' (cueing al -out $1,200 a year.
The 1i,000,000 was in cash, in addi-
tion to his investments of various
kinds. Thev" are a dozen men in
New York wt'o ask me for oeca:ional
loans of from 5U cents to $5 who,
when I tirss canoe to NOW York,
-i�il i III I ,I• j I T�f"71.11�-••• I„ r I
Pileg etablePrep arat i on for.A5 -
sifllilating thel'oOti and1 le ul:l
ling th
Stomachs run; :'3oWC1 i�
YT`
Promotes Digestion,Cheerful- 1
ness and Rest.Contains neither
i�s�pIurci,Morphine nor Mineral.
BOT NA.11C °TIC.
_Rego oi•Old Par, tE21 l'17ir? .'I
,tTionpkrn Seed'
�1lxSc m r .
,Ti'edretls Sake
tL,ire Seed •
Ta• pe mint -
a CarknaeSeds
Warn Seed -
�•Cmihcd Su [cell
IYburyrr
AperfectIlernedy for Constipa-
tion, Sour Stomach,Diarrhoea,
Worms ,Convulsions ,Eeverish-
n is and Loss OF SLEEP.
TocSirni!e Signature cf
NEW YORK.
SIGNATURE
OP EVERY
BOTTLE OF
is
Castoria is put up in one -size bottles only, It
:.. is not sold in bulk, Don't allow anyone 'co sell
j 1I yon anything else on the vlea or promise that it
�t1 is "just as good" and "will answer every pur-
pose, ' $eo that you get O -A -8 -T -0 -R -I -A.
j a Tht be -
3310110
signature
of
EXACT 'COPY07WRAPPER,•
s'1
as,Yb�s�:-ell; h yt^ ,•;+.
�3
is ozF
oterq•
wropps „
p° uc �n Lottie
w
uta
especially true of hood's rills, for no medi.
eine ever coned ed so great Curative power In
so small space. They are a whole medicine
.hest, always ready, al-
ways cftleient, always sat.
triaged; prevent a cold
alar tower, cure all liver il19,
tick trovada'c%rb, jaundice, eon•ttpat!on,
""Yes, but the boat might be in
heaven t . you it " cents mower Included, and bo Gurcd.
For a moment the oldar?;y
looked perp
and smiled broadly on his persistent j and death)ar ,Ov The
fox teff- i Chase's
ve remedy
fare. ' Catarrh Cure.
"" Why, anybody'd take yeti for an 'Physicians failed to cure Geo. Blelfrey,
ignorant parson if • you talk like toll•gat Cates hr Holl c 1 taudit18 road.
de ob ivoC , L war two oxer
faith 'de
question,
ion,t got anything t0 dU ilD•-visiOn. Court (leek Joel Rogers, Rob•
rvid de ucstion, 110 salt 1 i
q err J. Hoover and Geo. Taylor, tell of
Becton, vohmtarily certify to the °M-
- bf Chase's Catarrh Cad.
HAVE YOU CATARRH ?
before knew 11, said the out ono surd Re -u :I.-obta:1i It for 25
the falmcr, d 1 Catarrh ds a disnereeable nod. ot-
fortsivo disease It usually results from
l 1 l lCXecl Then he rallied cold owl often ends ill consumption
gat,» he said ; " daG boat wa'n't , Ons Bos cured Zv illiaan Iinersbaw and
mad •t made obb James T.Stoddard, Both of
and tt
V X.
p Hicks—In my judgment 110 matx, W. Jentifaaon, of Gilford, spent ricer y
bottle. Its value is fncltlurtblo, 13e sero
400 on doctors, but found no permanent
•
and Halt for Mrs. Winslow's Soothing ought to marry lentil he is fully able relief until he retch a 2s cent box of
,Syrup, nod take no outer kind to supporta wife
' lu z -.- '
ought to harry until he is amide to colts es- ReN Nicholls, in '12 Mute.
Chase's..
W' 1 s In my opinion n9 man bliss Dwyer, of Alliston, got rill of a
Ilcn 3 Rectory street,
w fever has matte its appear- wife and fair shall child- tried n boa` with excellent et,
• feet. '
and All the neighboring cities home : _ Dr. Chase's Catarrh ,n i .
• tlnnlcr, or by T.ilmanson, I3atata h
taken alarm. The vigor -„ -.......................,......—..--,;--....”-_±..._,__..-aria CO., 'Toronto. 'Price
quarantine officers ;;encu'- r Ovarllawllratsvtth tntost and richest pictures. with r, ., braneli?Ial troubles
ally keeps. this pingo within narrow i tains
History at her reinliee. e reign, and cull
n J bel o Only Majesty,
e t0.y, nig X1$9' cured by the latest tliscoverq,
Yellow support a t 1 'London, trir
angio on the gulf coast in 11.tisstssippl, i r en, 1 (lure is for sale by
o • with which I --- n)t) 21 eeuta including
scores of private elti�Len$ appoint
,WANTED -Agent., for "Wen Vtotort ,
n i1 ltelkn and Diamond Jubilee, 1)lowcr.
themselves q m the endorsed
l bio;tranc1 et leer etuesti, i Cattg, N colds �tstd
llinits in t110 Southern States. a nceount et the tnmaad n e
book. 'rrentead'•tte demand. nannnsa for agent. Chsse.'s Ii.erat e
I p.rya for the Tlrrsta until enid,atOnt[lt trporroatit. Cradle even. lrrotght Rift and easy to take. o cents.
��C,T�iVT$ i Duero ntd. �vtae tar eurttt
lantiary at 1SS13 "subscribe riow mid t•rrttoty. fi>3it DOatilviez' o0M1?A1VX, Dept,
i%iia On'1y Mita to tate *Mk Hood's -Ape
" d cit<l true eratan P1eae,
ate• z. and lot the tint chioptoxe,of our now story 7, 350 D••rboen st., Cbi'owgo,
oz.
. t1,
DIME GIVES RELIEF.
n't Spe.k:,�-
t ollar
for
O
dee
until you have tried
You can buy them in _ - per 5 -cent cartons
Ten Tabules r Five Cents.
Thus sort is put up cheaply to Gratlty tho universal prosont demand icor a low price.
If you don't find this sort of
Ri
t the
s Ta.uies
Drug wj is
Send Five Cents to Tun RIPANS CiremCA'L COMPANY, No. 10
Spruce St., New York, and they will be sent to you by nice rr
12 cartons will be mailed for 45 cents. The chances al. _ t :r
one that Ripens Tabules are the very medicine you nee..
Do You 'equirp
Printed. $tatiinery
We are in a position t0 turn out
e o e • • . . • • •
•
BILL IHE.H�-.EA.D;�..
DS,
LET JL EB HEADS,
NOTE HEADS,
STATEMENTS, ETC.
ba•m
• • • • • • • At a lt.` ver prie , tbilii ever before.
We have the best steels cf "rnvelopes in town, and we call
print .and supply thea] as cheap as the cheapest.
sA
Printed on the shortest; notice and the price in itt3ping
with the times.
Give us a call when ,r•ou are in need of' anything in the Printing line
and we will use you right.
THE DVS, 'VVin,gha >I