Wingham Times, 1892-12-23, Page 3TJE WING. i..M TIMES, DECEMBER 23, 1892,x.
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Same time Breaking It,
ago a troop-ehapwass return-
ing from abroad, and among the pesseu
gens was an old lady who had a favorite
parrot, winch she placed under the
especial care of one of the ,sailors. On
doing to attend Polly •one anorning he
was surprised to find that poor bird
dead, and knowing how very inuoh up.
set the old lady w+auld be to hear of the
death of her favorite, and not feeling
equal to imparting the sad intelligence
himself, he employed •a brother tar, who
was famous for has.gentiewess•fn matters
of that nature. defog up to the old lady
with a very seed face and touching his
cap, ho said:
T don't think that 'ere parrot of yours
will live long, manna.
Oh, dear, said the poor old lady, WbY?
Cos he's dead, was the comforting re-
ply.
The Cause .of Ahoumatism.
Au acid which exists in sour milk awl
oider, called lactic acid, is believed by
physicians to be the cause of rheumatism.
Accumulating iu `lie blood, it attack the
fibrous L eill:•es in the joints, and causes
agouiziug painas. What is ueeded is a
renierly •to neutralize the acid, end to so
invigorate the J idateys and liver that all
waste will be carried off. Hood's Sarsa- I
purilla it, heartily recommended by inauy
whom it has cured of rhoutnatima, It
posseshes.juht the desired qualities, and HO
tboroughly purities the blood as to prevent
oconrrttt+.ce of rheumatic attacks. We
ane,gest v. trial of Flood's Sarsaparilla by
all who suffer from rheumatism.
moment, but he seethed to peraetaber , Drawn And Qnarte;red,
something i bshould
hat this
how do some boiled quails strike was goug back to the ys. Hera
Political Zrovervs.
Sentimental politicks won't wash.,
The constitution is a bigger thing than a
you ? is a story about a man who was drawn and ' wltee,tfteld,
Broiled or stewed, it's immaterial to ' quartered, I A, politichan always promises more than
me, she answered noechalaatly. 1 Hownow—Wlteie did it happen? he pays.
Then he became cross and delivered I Wagg—Bight here in Ontario. Pollitioks, pulpits and petiootes aint
himself of an opinion,Hownow—It must have been 20Q years three uv a kind.
See here, Alice, you've got to decide, I I ago. Holdin' obis is pie; getting there is the
don't want to,go and order something for Wagg—Not at all, it was only last week' fire that cooks it.
our first dinner—. Hownow•---Great heavens 1 man, your Parliment ain't no place to learn a man.
And then he suddenly paused as Alice crazy. how to keep a mortgage of Ws farm.
moaned: Wagg—Well, crazy or not, it is right here Stump speakin' is like oourtin'; the can
Oh, hush I knew you'd forget. You've in the paper.
given it away after all my attempts to Hownow—Tell mo about it, quick.
seem so old married 1 Oh, Ralph 1 Wagg—Well, it seems he was a popular
And the hearers thought again of the politician, and when be came to a certain
town to speak, he was drawn to the town
destroys all that the finesse of woman than by sixwhite horses and afterwards
accomplishes. And they also wondered
again why the victims of a wedding
journey should regard themselves. as
criminals.
stupidity of men and how it ruthlessly
The Advertising
Of hood's Sarsaparilla is always iu the
bounds of reason because it is true; it al,
'quartered at the best hotel in the place.
Proved Beyond Dispute.
No one now doubts that Burdock Blood
Bitters will cure dyspepsia, bilioumnees,
constipation, headache or bad blood. The
proof is so thorough and overwhelutiug
that thedoctors. have been silenced and 13
B Bis secured in its place as the best puri -
ever; ,appeals to the sober, common souse tying tonic and regulator extant.
of tiaidvkieg.people because it is true; aaat.cl' Baum HOLT, Princeton, fJut.
it is always fully substautiated by eudorae-
menta which, in the fivauciul world would A Victim i3T Marriage.
I be,,aooepted without e reomout's he ita-
tio n.
For a general family cathartic weAouJi-
demuly r'ecotnmeud Hoon's PILLS
International Amenities.
A German and a Frenchman sat opposite
each other .at a table d'hote in a Swiss
ahotel.
You are a Frenchman, I suppose? en-
quired the (German at the commencement
of the meal.
Yes, was the reply ; bnt how did you
manage to find that out ?
Because you eat so much bread, said the her draw while he is getting ouv ,under
German, '111iere was a long pause. When .1las vlaaulb-affil.
the dinner was over the Frenchman in his she eat, talk as sweet un praellWre rand
turn questioned his vis-a•vjs: cream to the Wolman she. tu,fett, .while
You are +aGerman I presume? two .wren would be punc..rng a:Lelt
To be wire.; lent tell me, pray, how you ct►iler'a heads uefore they excl4uut;rd
What Woman Can Do.
Seine hmaekuus philosopher lass lor-
mlulat.-d an array of facts which seem to
Nstaali.h woman's superiority to shaft.
Fur example:
Six women esti talk at nttoo at.rd gm:
adongtfirst-rate, and two Hien caw' do
that.
She call come to con:l0'ti00 wdtltont
the slog t est trouble of reasouisag tin It, since with three knives, two guns an' her 1
and 111114 sane man can do that. dander np.. Say, I'm layin' low, I am. Liz I
.{file can safely `tuck fiity pins in wants a caliker dress, nalligator grip an' a
Hain't been any scootin' 'round these
parts, has they, stranger ?
Not unless she got by when my back was
turned.
Nary catamount with her back up,lookin'
fer trouble ?
Not lately.
Nary compound extract of Calamity Jane
an wholesale destruction?
Nary.
Then I reckon.I ken stop and breathe
myself.
Broke a faro bank at The Colonel's Own
last night, en my wife's been arter me ever
didate promises more ia a month than he
will ever do in a lifetime.
Taint to be expected that fifty er bun-
dred men that dont know how to keep out
uv set knows how to make laws inshuring
ABlessing to E
HOLIOWAY'S P111
These remedies have stood the teat of fifty year's eXPey
Party' the blood,' correct all disorders of the I+IY
Invaluable in all complaints in
OS
Is the only reliable remedy for bad legs, eons, u
Ttt130ATS, COUGHS, BOLDS, GOUT, RHEtl3IAT
P(SEASES iT HAS 10 EQUAL. Manufactured only a
and sold by all Medicine Vendors throughout the world.
e''Purhasers should look to the Label on
not 538 Oxford Street. Loudon, they are spur
business prosperity to the country, aye
Be A Nissior ary.
Bow ofteu iu church, lecture -room or
theatre will notice the shoulders of a geed
looking garment plentifully besprinkled
with L.tudruff. Be a rniesiouary and tell
the people that rl.nti•Dandruff that is
guaranteed to remove Daudruff in three
applicatious.
made that discovery,
Becanse yon ate so much of everything,
was the .dry retort.—Schweizer Volks-
mund.
ten word::.
can throw a stone with .p, curve
that would he a fortuuts to a baseball
gatltuhNr.
I is a urPl',r V81 et this Slim.can stay no in much a low, voice
Pain :• il,er p
preparntien., rate ttl keep and to Rea in that it 411«ans yes,
every ftataily The simplicity attend- She can sharpen a lead p.ncal if you
in;,r tis u,N; t t.te1li.r +71t.it the i;retr give her plenty of time and tadenty of
variety trf.diseases that may he entire- p,.uctils.
ly er.t,licttni by it, and the great
bite 'can (lance all flight in a pair of
amount of pain and snfl•'rinii that eau shoes ,two sizes too small for her sad
he
alleviated through its use, lnal;et, it enjoy every mint] 1,4 of the time,.
lutpe-+tart' noon every person to sup- --�
ply thwr'selvl•4 with this vaiottbte man-
ed,y, awl keet, it alwaya star tit. liana.
o Ask for the Nov.. 1.;1t; 25u 1',ott.le.
He Oughtto Know.
A well known actor was talking one day
in a cafe about an acquaintance that he had
picked up in a train; I was perfectly
amazed at the intimate knowledge the man
, possessed of everything relating to the
Berlin theaters. He was thoroughly in-
itiated in all their little schemes and knew
all about the financial position of each of
the managers. I asked nim: I presume I
have the honor of speaking to a fellow
actor,?
No, he replied.
Or a theatrical agent?
Nothing of that kind.
Or one of our leading critics?
No, I am sorry to say. Trunk train going up to fort. Huron, and she washes my face too hard and palls m
But allow me to ask, how did you acquire it was not long before his modest diffidence hair with the comb.
this unprecedented familiarity with the so impressed her that she let him sit beside Seven o'clockl
concerns of the Berlin theaters ; you must • her and divide the charming landscape with T hat's when the bell goes jingle, jingl
have tw greeat deal to do with actors and her through the same window. After a and we have breakfast.
managers ? delightful talk of half an hour, says the All the eight an' nine an' ten an' levo
Quite correct, said the man curtly ; I am Datroit Free Press, he began to refer to hours I play.
a sheriff's officer. himself and his labor.,
I run after butterflies and squirrels, an
dimun ring, long with a ticket to Tomb -
stone, so's she kin run down an see her
folks. I don't object to sendin her up the
road, but l've got . my eye on the bank at
Jupiter Jonees', an' on throw in a gilt -edge,
double header toot. But that's the way
with wimmen. No idees of what's what
Ain't married be ye ?
Well, I guess not.
Young fellow, yer in big luck, cause
marriage is a 'failure, blamed if 'tain't,
Say, I'm going over to Jupiter's, e1
run counter of a blizzard in a
runnin' that way kindly lead 'er o
er you saw me makin' fur the C
Own, an' obliged t' ye. Good day,strang
Baby's Clock.
Nobody finks I can tell the time of da
but I can.
A fatuous soap tnatlttfacturer was
once Relied why he did newspaper ad-
vertisin; ;tltogetlirr and did not fol-
low lu the footsteps of other manufac-
turers, putting up siell boards, printing
almanacs, etc. He replied last in
his expel ience he found thet the utas,
who did not road the t.ewgpapers
fiver Used soap.
Our Gift to Every One of Our Readers
"A YARD OF PANSIES."
By special arrangement with the pub-
lishers, we aro enabled to make every
ono of our readers a present of one of
these exquisite Oil Pictures 36 inches
long, a cumptuilon to "A Yard of Roses"
which all have seen and admired. This
exquisite picture, "A. Yard of Pansies,"
WAS painted by the same noted artist
who did the "Roses." 'It is the satne size
and is pronounced by art critics to be far
superior to .th e "Roses." The reproduc-
tion is equal in every respect to the ori-
ginal, which cost $300, and accompanying
i it are full directions for framing at home,
at a cost of a few cents, thus forming a
beautiful ornament for your parlor ora
superb Christmas gift, worth at least S5.
I Send your natneand address to the pub-
; lisher. W..1 ENNINGS Dto,IOREST, 15 'East
14th St New York, with three two -cent
stamps to pay for the pa g,
' fi you 1
etticoat
en tell
lonel's
REQULAT
STOMACH, LI �9'
- AND
PURIFY Til
A RELIABLE R
Indigestion, Biliousness,
Dyspepsia, Chronic Liver
Complexion, Dysentery, 0
disorders of the Stomach,
Ripans Tabules contain nothing injurio
tion. Pleasant to take, safe, effectual.
druggists. A trial bottle sent by mail
THE RIPANS CH
xo Spruce Street,
TRY IT
chin mailing,1
etc.. and mention that yon are a reader' I i�
elf the TIMES, and you will recoive by 1•e '_ .g-
turn mail one of these valuable -Works
of Art.
and he cenori ced that
For tike past year 1 have been troubled The first hour is 5 o'clock in the morn
to a very great extent with Daudruff, also ice,
et dtallloesa of odor in may hair, and through That's the time the birds begin to peep
the advice of a friend (who spoke from ex.
perience) I tried your Anti -Dandruff,
which, upon the application of lees thin a
bottle of your liquid I find my head not
only cleansed hut w vast improvement in
the color ani growth.
I have au,d do recommend it highly bene-
ficial to the nrofeesiou an d public general-
ly as an agreeable and welcome tnnova.-,
tine iu the remedies put forth for public
favor. Yours, eftc., WM P WOLFE,
Advertising Agt, "Frank Daniels Co."
Season 3soo,.P1.
Lovely to be an Editor.
WEE OIISHINO YOUNG WOMAN WAS DELIGHTED TO
MEET ONE OF THE P11OPESSION.
A drummer for a certain paper mill met
a sentimental young woman on a Grand
I lie still and hear them sing:
Tweet, tweet, tweet 1
Chee, Ghee, chee 1
But mamma is fast asleep. Nobod
wake in all the world but ale and th
birds. •
Timeby the sun gets up and it's (! o'cloc
in the morning.
Then mamma opens one eye and I ca
hear her say :
Where'e my baby?
N'en I keep still—jus' as still as a mouse
an' she keeps saying ;
Where's my baby ?
N'en all at once I go Boot and she laugh
and hugs me, and says I'm a precious.
Mamma's nice, and I love her 'cept whe
b'I ',111
s
Is the finest [i'a i I+ini,:h know,,.
r•
RUBBER PAINT
is the best in the worl.i.
J. A. CLINE & 00,
STONE BLOCK,
��ringllatn,
Sole Agents or above
Cannot be boated,
The curative influence of the pine in
.,eteg diseases is everywhere admitted, and
"" wheh combined with other effective pee-
toral remedies as in Dr Wood's Norway
Pine syrup tbe effect is doubly beneficial.
required. Such intellect. Snell a compre- dialer's ready !
No cast. of cough, cold, teatime, broehhitis q The ono and two hours are lost. Mamma
or ccareeness can'resist the healing power pensive breadth and knowledge. So much
of lar Wood's Norway Tine Syrup, 25 and of all that clovelops a man's brain and always carries me off to take it nap.
artist, politician and statesman. 1 a
50o. at drueaists. makes him equally a scientist, teacher,poet I don't like naps. They waste tjme.
_ m When we wake up the chock strikes three.
A Nonchalant Bride.
It was at the hotel table, and they
looked suspiciously like a bridal couple,
but their conversation seemed to dis-
]sicked his sample ease under the seat and
prove the theory. Ile had explained in
rather loud tones that he had sewed the didn't tell her any better.
loop on his overcoat with white thread,, =irixem foe Boys and Girls, she bad told him that if he'd had 1 Montag
any ingenuity he could have made it alai
«,laps to & at co Termite,
ell t e, 4f not e f E
black by drawing it through the'ink boyr,and girls ttlltltlr I6; rostdh,tr is tho;Provinoc of
bottle. So that everyone could see they Or .111o, who send the arcat,at number of "soft-
ware
,yappers: tet, �jfo; god, 16; 3rd, e l ; 4th,
were old married people, for a bride pi ; M i tol4th, a Itamt1on,o nook t and a pretty
otild have reproachfully asked aids why picture to wrappers
Who need not 1686 than cC wrapt, on.
w :Sand wrappers to "Sunlight" Soap Guice. 43 soon. sloop,
5t., Toronto, not tatet than gOth o1 oaoh hent!), acid So I sluts illy, oyes tight and the next you
IIA hadn't let her, do it, nlmrked "Conrpstltiort" ; also give 14411 name, ad•
'laen they began to order their dinner. grass, rare, and mnubet of wrappers. tvinesrR ]mow 'tis rooming j
Will you have a redhead duck or a ! gatardny le oath friar to lir Cha Tmont6 Alia nu ores An' nat's all the time there is,
Ieaallard'/ he flaked.
What business are you in ? she inquired, 1 swing, and road my picture book, an
naively. sometimes I cry -jus' a little bit.
The newspaper business, he said.
Oh, she twittered, how lovely it must be
to be an editor. So much intelligence is
Twelve o'clock 1
That's a bu'ful hour. The clock strike
a lot of times, end the big whistle goes, an
sure—arid, ell, liow softly sweet her eyes N'en I have on my pink dress an' we go
turned upon him --I am sure I could love wanting or riding.
an editor. And so these and four and five hours are
Then the modest, diffident drummer gone.
At six o'clock Bossy comes home, and 1
have my drink of warm mjlk.
Nam 1 put on my white gown, and x' kiss
everybody good night, and say, now lay
me, and get into my bed.
Mamma says:
Nop the sun and thebirclios and my little
baby aro all gone to bed, and to sleep,sleapa,
I'm etir6 Z don't know, she returned,' Nllgd to get his dseartt3. ited Kingdom, from Montreal icor tits peat
tardy. I don't knew th6 difference be -1 wiulenu•ttovat C1r6trrt 1'temed7,frraatest onn un season was 1,$lifl;628 boxers, being err in.
• elf t3 redhead dtaok ifind 8 blue-eyed am. ' atlilsriteed 10 tmr+ ICslisrst elver."''btcbitlq, arose ;over the ■hipmeniir of 1891 of 19p,•
tf'Iafl •LTouritlKlF, PNr►'yala, elver."'
' WA Ax[it`ett tIIR fellow With pl•uty of The fatal shipment of cheese to the 'On.
1'theente , awe .
S1178b + ll
Week
ree Press
-- AND --
FARM
FARM AND HOME
FOR 189$
$1.00 Both Papers for $1.00
ENLARGED AND IMPROVED
A HIGH CLASS FAMILY PAPER.'
Bseh Nutiubsr Will Contain :
Itsw, bit,'TAtvtAar'S Smoot dellrersd the aunday
previeusly.
WArtemA*'$ WAxesaiNee.,
Aearctlt•tolk6 1tfAraliu� IiiatFrateti.
1,Artits' PAU11-..1110itratcd.
Aseit:t1, T'Attl,and other lntomietingfeminist Inailer,
-- w`7�D�Vi>•DI�i
NOW —
Pricie, One Pallet a year in edrktlee ter the
W11E5J.V "IMP; PlttltSS and ItAllf AItII 110111
In td! 16 pass,
Deltaic. el 1152 ras to naw subscribers
Aeentr **owed la .,ivy uirspr.ssnWW dlrirlel io
roltntl subiariptiona.
fle.90 Weil Pl 1%11$ tltl.,
q,tititses aeli M.
WINGHAM
STEAM PUMP ORKS1
hilts & Shwa;
.We wish to inform the people ot Wing -
ham and` surrounding country, that, as
we have purchased the Steam Pump
Works lately owned by Mr. 11. Clark, we
iaie prepared to supply all Weds of
70
I :it
ra'
be
Wooden, L111, Force & Iron Pumps
And attend to the wants ef tbe public
in anything in the Pump line.
c
As we have a long experience in the
business we guarantee all our work, and
if not satisfactory will refund the'tnonoy.
We also deal in
ALL KIODS OF WIND MILLS.
`i`{ot1 water cisterns made on short
notice,
Orders by matt promptly attended to.
0ROW SI'ON 3e S1i1 GVII ,
Witightnee.
FOR SALE,
of Lot No.
llth Con .Turn` rry-� tO "wrest; SO **roe
cleared; tell tenc.d; frank. k�� triad
other hu diAf3`s; good oreh*rd; y, on
titin.. Apply to . C. 0A.li ISMON,
Or
01.