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HomeMy WebLinkAboutWingham Times, 1891-12-25, Page 7N 41 } 4Il 0.0. T1lttrit �cvirairl. After Al ark '1'wain had tnado itirnsol f famous by writing Innocents Abroad, ho began ti look rolled for a wife. Ile got to be It settled old bacliolov' be fore be eget Miss Lizzie Langdon,tlau ghter of Judge Langton, of Elsaira,N. Y. Alark was awfully stupid about :love matters, and it will always be a Mystery how he first propose to such. a beautiful and wealthy girl as Miss Langdon. But he did it,after his own fashion and was rejected. Well, be said falteringly, I didn't think you'd gas's ills, 'hiss Lizzie, but .I couldn't help trying. But Mark's love grow stronger and stronger, and after a while he tried again. He went to the young lady and said Then you think you won't never want to marry me, Miss Lizzie? Oh, no, 11r. Clemens, at least not this year. Well, he said, with his celebrated drawl. I think a good deal more of you than if you'd have said yes,but it't hard to bear. Some time after this Mark came to the young lady as he was about to leave, and said, with moistened eyes : S'pose there ain't any hope for me Lizzie ? Why, yes. When ? Now.. Then I mast speak to your father about it? asked Mark tremblingly. Yes. This speaking to the old Judge was the hardest task of all. But 1Vlark went off and laid a deep plan to win the old gentleman's consent. He got his speech alt reab.and then went to the dignified old millionaire, and begnn : Judge, he began, Judge --- Well, what is it, Mark ? I say, Judge—do you know—or per- haps you've seen—yes, webby you've seen sumethin' going on between Miss Lizzie ant me ? What ? What? exclaimed the Judge rather sharply, apparently not under- standing the situation, yet doubtless getting a glimpse of it from the in- quiry. • Have you seen anything going Oil between Tries Lizzie end me? No indeed, replied the magnate, sternly. No, sir, I have not. Well, look sharp and you will. And to this day ivi ark is always con- -grtttulating himself on the shrewd way that he captured this learned judicial luminary and won his case. I may be an innocent abroad, he said afterward, to his friend David Weleher, but I'm not as almighty in- nocent as I look at home. And when we see the beautiful home of the humorist in Elartford, and see his happy and beautiful children, it is evident that Miss Lizzie had just as sound judgment as Mark. Good Advice. DEAR SIRS, --I have been troubled with headache for over 40 years, and had it so bad about once a week that I was sometimes not expected to live. I was ad. vised to use B. B. B., and have used three bottles. I now have an attack only once in four or five mouths, and feel that if I continue using it I will be entirely cured. Therefore I recommend it highly. MBs. E. A. STonEr, Shetland, Ont, Too True.—Most any man, until he dies, still wants the earth, while fail- ure fiets 1hiiYi ; tiut yet don't seem to realize the earth wants him—and finally gets him. Is simply epidemic Influenza'; Wilson's ' G .ildCherry will cure it safely and quickly. Get the genuine, in white wrappers only, and use it as directed for Influenza. The man barn in a cabin may some day name a cabinet. Fond Wife : Why so thoughtful, dear ? Will gen get much if you cure that Ivan ? Sawboneu . No ; but if he dice I'll be sure to get my bill. His life is insured. . 'For Pani or Colds. ' BNTLr fI N,— rifteen menthe ago I had a bearing breast. I tried a num- ber of remedies but got no relief. I then tried flagyard's Yellow 0i1 which gave me instant relief. It is the best thing I eye° used for all kinds of pain or cold, Mas,J'oin Comex. St. Marys, Ont. Reetee ng Tenmptatipn, Old Uncle Iilben was going along past Brown's store, flaying; no .attention to anybody and evidently far from the mcaddlinf crowd's ignoble strife, when Brown saw Hire, Ilello, uncle, bo called out, where have you been lately ? 1 haven't seen you for a mouth. Been to ineetin' mos'ly, Mas' Tom, answered the old man, humbly, Oh, there's a revival on, is there? Yes, sir, Mas' Tom. Well, you ,ought to be slipping down on the coop these nights. Fattest chickens, roosting law down there,you ever saw. The old man's eyes began to bright. en. Watermelons in the patch yet, too, and svteet, potatoes corning on, con- tinued Brown, seductively. ;Uncle Eben began to grow fidgety and his mouth watered, but he was firm. You could see that plainly. Go 'way Mas' Tom,he,said pleading- ly, go 'way wid yo' temptin' speechify: in'. Yon haiu't no right to be pnttin' temptation in de ,ole man's paf. I'se clone got religion, Mas' Tom, an' dein yar tings ain't fer nee uo mo' 'deed dey ain't, Mas' Tom. Fat chickens, watermelons, sweet potatoes, nor anything, uncle ? wheed. led Brown. No, Mas' Tom, and Uncle Eben raised his eyes piously ; but of you'll be polite enough to tell me jes wire.' dey is, T'll communicate with some of dese unregen'ate sinnahs what hain come nigh do mo'ners bench yet, and I specs dey'll git down der fer a spell, one o' dese yer nights fo' de moon am clar gene, an' '11 see dat Uncle Eben ain't lef' to suffer mo'n he kin b'ar. Mas"Tom, after dey gits back from de flesh -pots ob Egyp. Brown chuckled, and Uncle Ebeu shuffled along. CONSUMPTION CURED. An old physician, retired from practice, hating had placed in his hands by an East India missionary the formula of a simple vgctable remedy for the speedy and permanent cure of Consumption, Bron- chitis, Catarrh, Asthma and all throat and Lung Affections, also a positive. and radical cure for Nervous Debility and all Nomads Complaints, after having tested,' its tvonderftrt^ 'curative ,powers in thousands of cases, he has felt it his duty to make is known to his snffering fellows. Aetnated by this motive and a desire to relieve human sutfot•inv, I will send free of charge, to all who desire it, this. recipe, in German, French or' English, with full directions for preparing and using. Sent by mail by addressing with stamp, naming this paper. W. n. Novas SiIe Pryers Block Rochester, N, Y. Blanche : Did you part owing to misunderstanding ? Rosalie: Good- ness me, no ! We understood each other too well. One of the aggravating things about housekeeping is that as soon as th weather gets so cool that ice is not greatly needed it ceases to melt, rapid ly. AMOR To mammas.— Are you disturbed at night and broken of your rest by a sick child suffering and Drying with pain of Cutting* Teeth? If so send at once and got a bottle of ' Mrs. Winslow's Soothing Syrup" for Children Teething. Its value is incal:ul- able. It will relieve the poor little suffcrar immediately. Depend upon it, mothers; there is no mistake about it. It aures Dysentery and Diarrhoea, regulates the Stomach and Bowels, cures Wind Colic, softens the Gums, reduces Inflammation, and gives tone and energy to the whole system. "Mrs. Win- slow's Soothing Syrup" for children teething is pleasant to the taste and is the prescription of one of the oldest and best cntale physicians and nurses in the United States, and is for sale by all druggists throughout the world. Price twenty-five cents a bottle. Be sure and ask for "Mits. Winnow's Soo'rnino SL'arr, ..nd talc° nn nther kind The only relatives Uncle Sam is in duty bound to take care' of are his trade relations, Better borrow from a „ pawn -broker than a -friend. A lost pledge may be bought again, but good will, never. Miss Joyce : Yes, Jack and T are to become partners for life. Miss Means : And you will be the senior partner, How nice'! HOLLOwAY'S PILLS.—In the com- plaints peculiar to females these Pills are unrivalled. Their use by the fair sex has become so constant for the re - 'novel of their ailments that barely a toilet is without them. A.lnenst all classes, from the domestic servant to the peeress,universal favor is accorded to these renovating Pills ; their invig- orating and purifying properties render them safe and invaluable in all ease ; they may be taken by females of all. ages or any disorganization or irregu- larity of the systenh,speedi.iy removing the cause and restoring the sufferer to robust health. As a family medicine they ate invaluable for subduing the nsaiftdies of young And old TRADE SALE r To General Jlcrchants and Boot and Shoe Stores, In connection with eta• Leather U:isinese 1 kelp e MI stock .of Shoemakers' Findings1 and can supply the trade at lowest prices with IFEATON AND PENINSULAR BUTTON FASTENERS SETS. w., IN 10, 15 AND 25c. sizes. IIATHAWAYS, WHITMORE'S, ZANON], ECLIPSE. gross lots at gross prices. LACES: COTTON, all lengths, RIFLE, I, e LEATHER, Single Tag, Horsehide, LEATHER, Double Tag Horsehide, GENUINE PORPOISE, ENGLISH LEATHER LACES. SHOE LEli,T HER, Domestic and French, at the very lowest Prices. HARNESS LEATHER, Best brands always on hand, in oak or hemlock tannage. GENUINE JAOQUOT'S FRENCH. BLACKING, AT REDUCED PRICES, Your patronage respectfully solicited, You will save freight, time and probably a percentage. Set the example of dealing at hone. W. J. CIIAPMAN, WINGHAM TANNERY. A SURE CURE FOR BILIOUSNESS, CONSTIPATION, INDIGESTION, DIZZINESS, SICK HEADACHE, AND DISEASES OF THE STOMACH, LIVER AND BOWELS. THEY ARE MILD,THOROUGH AND PROMPT IN ACTION, AND FORM A VALUABLE AID-. TO BURDOCK BLOOD BITTERS IN THE TREATMENT AND CURE OF CHRONIC AND OBSTINATE DISEASES. SANITARY PLUMBING AND HEATING. ALEX. SAUNDERS, GOA 3 E IC 3_ LATEST METHODS : Particular attention paid to Sanitation and Ventilation. Plans and Specifications care- fully prepared. Repairing Promptly Attend- ed to. Three Trains Daily. • Telephone No. 28. Correspondence Solicited. ZETLAND S.i .W MILL GEORGE THOMSON, Proprietor. Lumber of all kinds, First-class Shingles, and Cedar Posts. Car load Orders, a Specialty. WOOD cleliSered to any part of Wiughanh. 0- Orders by Mail promptly attended to. GEORGE TiHOMSON, winatain P. O. DR. FOWLERS cEXT: OF o -WILD • TRAWBERRY ii'�� CURES HOh'ERA holera Morbus O,1r I C'atia •- FlAMPS IARRH(EA YSENTERY AND ALL SUMMER COMPLAINTS 'AND FLUXES ► F THE BOWELS IT IS SAFE AND RELIABLE FOR CHILDREN OR ADULTS. WHERE DO YOU LIVET Half of the people o our County don't knon,.Vie position of ono Township from another. They can now overcome this difficulty by consulting the COOPER MAP fUL COUNTY OP HURON Which has been long needed and looked for. The size is four foot by five feet mounted on linen and wood .rollers. Six coloring are used, whieb makes it very distinct and effective, THE SCHOOL SECTION NEEDS ONE, THE FARMER NEEDS ONE, THE BUSINESS MAN NEEDS ONE. PRICE, $3.50. Published by W. COOPER. & CO,, Clinton, Ontario, Stationers, School Globes and, all kinds of MapsBooksellersanand School Supplies. Write for prices and our traveler will call on you. FOB THE BEST VALUE IN ORDDRED CLOTHING, GO TO ST R' HATS, CAPS, COLLARS, SHIRTS, CUFFS, Cheap for KASH. AT— — EBSTEI,'S PJ;h1\ va) a iv vAi M.11 takaP tlt PAM. Has removed to E. F. Gerster's cid stand, where he has a large and nicely assorted stock of atchesd gess, Xew1'1lery, Silverware and Speetaelea, Which he is selling away down in price, and will be pleaaed to have you call and take a look through his Stock. Repairing a SDec alty 'All work warranted and done promptly. Ed. D • ���:�le Mason's Block. FOUND a -Y-1 MANUFACTURERS OF LP Four and Six Knife, the best, in the Market. Would invite the attention of farmers and those requiring the same that, we are selling; these at bottom prices. ene Arai Machine Repairing f AS USUAL. OA STINGS in BRASS or IRON, TO ORDEIL Wingham, Deeelnber 2nd, 1801. JAS. MURRAY RAY & CO.