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HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2015-07-16, Page 5THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, JULY 16, 2015. PAGE 5. Want to find out if your marriage is strong like bull or flaccid as a pyjama drawstring? Here’s a simple test. Take your mate to Ikea. A psychologist at California State University says if your union can survive that, chances are the two of you will be blowing out candles on your 60th wedding anniversary. Professor Ramani Durvasula says a visit by wannabe life partners to the iconic Swedish furniture store can make or break the relationship. She often goes herself (solo) with a clipboard in hand. “It’s like psychology porn” she says. A furniture store as a marriage breaker – who’da thunk it? Professor Durvasula says the trouble usually starts in the kitchen section. It begins as a mild difference of opinion over the dishwasher and ends in a screaming match about who does the most cooking or who never cleans out the fridge. When she can get their attention, Professor Durvasula asks couples who have bought furniture to report back to her after they take it home and assemble it. That’s when the heavy matrimonial bombardment really starts. Relationships can usually skate through minor assembly jobs like coffee tables and book cases. It’s the more complicated items that take their toll. Like an Ikea wall unit called the Liatorp. “That’s the divorce maker” says the prof. Odd that one company can swing that kind of weight – but then Ikea is no ordinary company. It’s big, for starters – 353 stores in 46 countries. It offers 12,000 products and sells $25 billion worth of goods each year. And now let me introduce a miserly drunken Swede by the name of Ingvar Kamprad. He is 81 years old, lives in a modest bungalow and drives a 15-year-old Volvo. He looks like a bum, drinks like a fish and pinches kroner like a Swedish version of Scrooge McDuck. Parsimony is not the only trait Kamprad shares with the iconic waterfowl. He, like Scrooge, is very, very rich. The seventh richest person in the world, worth $15.7 billion. That’s because ‘way back in 1943 he formed a furniture company and named it with the first letters of his name, Ingvar Kamprad, the farm he grew up on (Elmtaryd) and his home town Agunnaryd. Put that all together, it spells IKEA. Kamprad has forsaken his village in Sweden for a villa in Switzerland, but it’s a potting shed, as villas go. And Kamprad continues to live as if he were waiting for his old age pension cheque to come in. He still wears a shabby raincoat and scuffed shoes and he still favours the bus over a chauffeured limo. In fact he was recently denied entry at a gala evening celebration because security guards refused to believe that the grungy hobo who’d just got off a bus could possibly be a guest at their swanky event. Kamprad was there to pick up a Businessman of the Year award. Moving into his ninth decade, Kamprad has loosened his grip on the IKEA reins and handed them over to his three sons. His long- suffering wife Margaretha stands by him even as he goes off to ‘dry out’ three times a year. And yes, their villa is furnished with IKEA products. Assembled by Ingvar. Without input from Margaretha. Obviously there’s no Liatorp wall unit in the Kamprad household. Arthur Black Shawn Loughlin Shawn’s Sense There’s very little secret in the fact that I’m into several ‘fandoms’, as they are called, including comic book characters and television shows. A fandom is the entirety of a group of people who enjoy a particular show, series, book or film. I’m part of a lot of them. There’s Doctor Who, The Lord of the Rings, Star Wars (and not Star Trek and, yes, there is a difference) and several comic book heroes. One of my favourite comic book heroes, Deadpool (of, most notably, the comic of the same name) is a bit quirky as far as comics go. First and foremost, he is aware of the fact that he is a comic book hero. He breaks the fourth wall all the time. So when the Deadpool movie, starring Ryan Reynolds, was announced, I was happy. Reynolds is the perfect actor to play Deadpool because of the comedy that denotes the character. One of my favourite panels from his stories is a direct reference to Spider-Man. He says, “Shhh, my common sense is tingling,” (compared to Peter Parker’s Spider Sense which warns him of oncoming danger). I always laugh, every single time I see it, because it seems to point to something that’s becoming more and more true the more time goes on: common sense is pretty much a superpower anymore. Take, for example, Shelburne’s “Country event”. Shelburne, N.S., was set to hold a special Founder’s Day weekend starting today. Originally, the weekend was set to hold a special Red Neck event which was apparently going to be based around TV’s Duck Dynasty. Now, love or hate the show, if you don’t think there are some similarities between the show and rural Canada, you are lying to yourself. People took offense to it (you know what, it’s not just death and taxes anymore, there are three constants: death, taxes and people over-reacting to benign things) and it was changed to the Shelburne County Country event. Regardless of what the Canadian Oxford Dictionary may say (which defines redneck as a derogatory term), I’ve always thought it to be an honorarium. To me a redneck is a person passionate about their beliefs and someone who earns their keep. Regardless of my belief, the belief of some people, including Ed Cayer, a Shelburne resident, is that redneck may hold a racist undertone to it. No, people aren’t using redneck as a racist remark, but he thinks that because of Duck Dynasty, people will equate redneck with racist or homophobic remarks. Now I consider myself a fairly liberal (small ‘L’ liberal) when it comes to letting other people live their lives. I don’t care what people’s beliefs are, what they do in the privacy of their own home or even who they voted for in the last election. None of that is my business as long as someone doesn’t go out of their way to change that. And trust me, I really don’t care who you go home to, who you vote for or if you do or don’t believe in the Bible. I’m a firm believer in letting people live their lives. That didn’t stop me, however, from dressing up like a member of the Duck Dynasty crew for Halloween a few years ago. I donned my best camo outfit (I use it for paint-ball and Airsoft. Much to my great shame, I’m just a poser when it comes to camouflage), tossed on a grey-ish beard and toted around a fake shotgun (where appropriate, it didn’t come to any pictures or interviews with me). Why? Well I did it primarily because I had the fixins for the outfit at home. The only thing I had to buy was a beard and some spray paint to finish the costume. I’m a big fan of costumes like that. If you can get the point across without spending hours crafting it or hundreds of dollars on it, well that’s what Halloween is all about. I didn’t do it because I, in any way, agreed with the views shared on the show. One of the big problems Cayer had with the event was a television personality look-alike event which is based on a “popular reality television show”. He believes it will lead to many people looking like Duck Dynasty characters and lead people to believe racist or homophobic remarks made by members of the reality programming. Hold on, my common sense is tingling. Rednecks have existed long before this show and will persist long after and I doubt very much that they all hold the same beliefs given that they are so widespread. And, let’s just take that idea and spread it a little further. Am I suddenly going to start officiating weddings and running church services because one year I dressed up as a priest from a vampire movie? No. Are people who dress up as skeletons and zombies suddenly going to start attacking living humans? Am I going to develop the ability to turn into a car because once upon a time I dressed up as a Transformer? Am I going to start hunting ghosts because I had a Ghostbusters costume one year? (The real ones, you know, Bill Murray, Harold Ramis, Ernie Hudson and Dan Aykroyd.) No. No one is going to, barring some kind of magic spell that is too often a script gimmick on television, turn into the character whose costume they are wearing. Heck, if they did, events like Comic-Con would be simultaneously much cooler and much more terrifying. The simple fact is people aren’t going to become racist because of a television show. Either they saw the show, or, in this case, donned their camo costume or they weren’t a racist or a homophobe and still aren’t. I hope that, like me, they genuinely don’t care what other people do as long as it doesn’t affect them, and putting on a costume isn’t going to change that. So let’s all start using a little common sense so that it’s more... well... common. Denny Scott Denny’s Den The sad side of life Some people may or may not know this about me, but I’m a documentary junkie. I guess it goes hand in hand with being a journalist, but I love true stories. There is so much to learn about the world and its people, without even scratching the surface of our imaginations. (That’s not to say we shouldn’t use our imaginations, but you know what I’m saying.) When I read a book, it’s always some form of non-fiction – whether it’s a biography, a sports story, true crime or community and culture (my personal favourite) I just find myself enthralled by being able to relay something I read and found fascinating, knowing that it actually happened. Having said all of that, I recently watched a documentary called Requiem for the Dead: American Spring 2014. It’s an interesting concept (a story told entirely through news footage and the social media accounts of those involved) about a worthwhile topic (the astounding number of gun-related deaths in the U.S. in just one season – Spring of 2014). I didn’t particularly like the documentary (there was no narrative whatsoever – it was like me trying to tell you a story by taking a pile of photographs and dropping a new one on the table every three seconds in some sort of story-telling order and leaving it to you to put it together) but it woke my girlfriend Jess and me up to the world of camera phones and social media that admittedly we didn’t really think existed: sad social media. Now, of course, “sad” social media posts are nothing new. Many have heard, or seen with their own eyes, people posting about being dumped, or being caught in a custody battle, or fighting with someone – all things that shouldn’t be blabbed about – and posting it online for all the world to see. What I’m talking about it a different kind of sadness – profound sadness. Because the stories of Requiem for the Dead are told only through social media posts, while watching, you have to stop yourself and remember where these images came from. A picture of a coffin containing the body of a dead teenager being loaded into the hearse... that someone posted to Instagram. A selfie taken by a grieving young man and his wife (sad looks all around, of course) on the way to a funeral... posted on Twitter. A mother who lost two children (one killed the other, then himself) letting her feelings flow... on Facebook. These are some of the most intimate and personal moments that will ever occur in one’s life, all for the wrong reasons, and they’re being immortalized. Why? Camera phones and social media have been interesting developments for the good things in life. They have connected friends and people have relived experiences for months, if not years after the fact. I know I have done exactly that recently, looking back and smiling at pictures of me and my team from last month’s Ride to Conquer Cancer. I like to relive that moment because it was happy. But funerals, I thought, have always been a notorious no-camera zone, unless we’re talking about documenting the funeral of a celebrity, an American president, a war hero. I have been to lovely funerals. I have seen beautiful flower arrangements on caskets and stood in front of gravestones on warm, breezy days. I’ve even spoken at a few funerals – given what I thought to be moving and apt eulogies for people I loved. But that, under no circumstances, means I’d want to go back and relive it – physically or remotely. Other Views How do you spell discord? I.K.E.A. A comic character had it right