HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Huron News-Record, 1887-09-14, Page 4fir
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The Huron News -Record
Wednesday, Sept. 14th, 1887
tti
OR UR ;TORY- REARDES.
The Next Door Neighbor's
Burglar.
The house next door had
empty for several weeks.
household had been duly solicitou s
over the next possible tenant, but
the edges of our anxiety had at last
worn off, as newer interests engross -
our attention.
One morning, as we sat down to
breakfast, everything was revived,
and a general flutter of conjecture
vibrated across the domestic wires
as wo watched load after load of
furniture turn in at the driveway,
next door, and. it became evident'
that the expected somebody was
moving in.
Who that 'somebody' was. we
later on learned : a Mrs. Brown,
widow, five daughters, (ono married)
four sons—all school boys except
the oldest, who it is believed was
abroad ; in fact, the necessary sum
total aggregated the verdict of 'a
family of respectability, members of
an orthodox church, etc.'
As is the usual custom in large
cities, whoa -your neighbors hove
• in, and somebody you are so anxi-
ous over is fairly confirmed in the
tack -driving ,and shade -hanging
• business, and you assured that there
are no unsettled questions in re-
• gard to their respectability, you
perfectly forget that the name on
the door -plats of Number 59 has
changed, and months, and oven
years may go by, before you can
find titne. to 'call.
Tho Browns had been -settled at
least six weeks in their new house,
and I, in the midst of my bitsy life,
had almost forgotten their exisDence.
A minister's wife • in a busy city
parish, has little time except for the
'must be knowns, .belonging to her.
husband's charge. Even The privi-
lege of good neighborship is seldom
granted her, unless, perchance, that
neighbor may bo of 'our household
of faith.' .
boon
Our By being repeatedly summoned
to assist in `bringing to' the different
members of the household, I soon
because sc well acquainted with the
business and so eminently success-
ful in it, that I was considered in-
valuable to the family, and I tem
free to confess, that in this strange
capaoity I learned to lovo my really
del ighTfiit nein bors.
nem, dropped on her knees before
we reached be door. I assisted
her to rise, and together at last we
entered the room where the family
were all gathered in a state of fran-
tic excitement—pale, helpless, and
despairing.
A glance and a few enquiries re-
vealed to rue the situation:. We
were passing through. one of those
periodical small -pox scares, and it
seemed that, the family being large
and the expense of vaccination
heavy one, the husband of the mar-
ried daughter had secured a suffici-
ent number ot'quills, and had un-
dertaken the task of vaccinating
the family. The work had pro-
ceeded successfully until Annie's
turn came. The ivory point had
no sooner penetrated her arm, than
she gave one shriek and sank life-
less upon the floor, apparently dead.
Too terror-stricken to give her
the needed help, the family flow in
every direction for restoratives, but
nothing could be found, and conse-
quently nothing done. - I raised the
poor child in my arms, administered
the simplest of emergency treat-
ments, and in a few. minutes she
opened her eyes, and so far recover -
as to bo able to speak to ]ler
mother.
This was the beginning of my
relations with the Browns. They
were the most friendly and kindly
people in the world, but nothing
ever happened in their house with-
out a crescendo. The family was ail
given to swooning of the most pro-
nounced type. A swoon per day
was no unusual thing, yet they could
not get used to it iu spite of the
frequency of its occurrence. The
mother alone was exempt from this
most unpleasant malady ; but in
the place of it she had hysterical
spasms and heart disease. Those
spasms worn always concurrent with
the swooning of' her children, but
happily did not benne unmanage-
able until after the 8woo nee hacl suf-
ficiently recovered to be in turn
alarmed about the mother. '
I h:(d Supposed that the Browns
held the exclusive right to swooning.
But in answer to an urgent call ono
day I was led down into the base'
relent, and there, across the dining -
room floor, lay • stretched at full
length a fine-looking, full -bearded
gentleman, in a dead swoon. I went
through tho usual method of restora-
tion, and the patient presently ro-
bared. lie seemed vory much em-
atarassed, so I excused myself and
vented to go home, My . good
-neighbor, 11frs, Brown;--fel-lowed-.me-.
to the door and toll me that this
was her eldest son' who had justro-
turned from a sojourn of eight
years in Paris. During his absence
he had not once swooned, but had
been in her house less than an hour
when the malady seized him.
Only a few days later my friend
.sent in frantic hasto for assistance.
Mrs. Maloney, the Irish washer-
woman, was'lying in a:fainting Wet
the bottom of the yard stairs, and so
hopelessly wedged iu between the
debris of clothes -basket, clothep-pins,
and rope, and the. sharp angle of tho
lower steps, that I saw at once that
it would take a. strong man to 'bring
her out.'
church le—quite—ft long walk for me
with any abort breath and the warm
weather, and the children were all
away except Molly and me. So
Sunday evenings we used to run
into the Baptist Church on Blank
Street, The minister was very
pleasant, and Mr. Grupe, his assist-
ant, was eo oordial that we felt
quite at home. lie inquired where
we lived and I noticed he wrote our
address on a slip of paper, about the
size of that piece you are holding.
You know how nervous I am about
the children, and' all summer I've
been dreadfully worked up a -worry-
ing about them. For there were
Mary and Annie up at the moun-
tainR;'lind Jennie and the children
at the beach, and, do know, I felt
almost sure that those tearing boys
of hors would get drowned or some
other dreadful thing would happen
to them. Then Georgo has been
kind of poorly since ho came back
to America, so he took his wife and
and the baby and wont up to the
Thousand Isles where we could hear
from them only at long intervals :
and we sent the little boys down to
their grandfather's farm. As you
may well believe, I had enough to
worry over.
,molly and I did not fool equal to
the expense -of taking a long vacat-
ion, besides I wanted to keep the
house open in case any of the absen-
toes should bo taken sick or die, and
be brought homo to be buried ; for
you know everything happens with
a crash at our house.
One evening, just at nightfall, a
tremendous jerk at the door -boll,
brought all the hon-ebold, c+vcn th,;
Imperturbable Bridget, upon its foo;„
and quickened her usually slow
• pace to quite a rapid jog. As she
passed by my door on her way to
. answer the ring, I heard her Mut-
tering : `That blathering teligraps
allus tears the bell all to flindors.'
I heard rhe front door open, and
at thesame time a feeble voice, half
hysterical, half asthmatic, and
wholly incoherent, struggling with
sobs and tears. I rushed to the
door myself, as I caught the words:
'Quick—quick—Annie—my baby
is dying—quick— quick. Vou'—
she clutched at my dress, and drag-
ging mo half way down the steps
before I recognized in her my next
door neighbor, Mrs. Brown.
Ministers wives aro proverbially
'quite self-contained, and, liko.their
good husbands, are expected to bo
prepared for any or every emergency.
So, catching a wrap from Bridget's
outstretched and thoughtful hand, 1
flow along with my newly found
neighbor.
She could toll mo nothing only
'Annie, Annie, my baby, is dying,
quick—quick'.—
Sevor'al times, she, in her weak -
"Ohl • mother 1" Molly cried,
" don't you know Mr. Groper and
the poor girl began to laugh hyster-
ically.
"Why, Mr. Group, the minister's
assistant—our kind Baptist friend ?"
In a minute the truth flashed up-
on me. This good and devout man
had come to pray with us. I being
aboeut he had knelt to pray with
Molly. She thinkiug I had a key,
and would not ring, bad chosen not
to answer the bell (believing it was
probably a podler or some other
unimportant call), lest the devotions
which had really touched her heart
deeply, uoving her to tears, should
be Interrupted.
Tho slip of paper which was the
cause of all my miserable high trag-
edy, was ono that Mr. Grope had
given Molly with the request that
she write upon it the various mem-
bers of the household us possible or
probable additions to the roll of the
the parish in which Mr. Group was
a most devoted member.
What Mr. Group said or did, and
how ho extricated himself from
such a humiliating position, Molly
and I can neither of us remember.
For once it was sweet to seek for-
getfulness in swooning, Wo both
of us "went off," she in a faint and
I in a spasm, that lasted long
enough for Mr. Group to vanish
from the scene of his unfortunate
pastorial labors.
Mr. Group has called
since."
"One day I left Molly at home
and declared that "I wouldn't be
such a goose any longer," and I
started down town for a round of
shopping. Well, my heart began
to palpitate before I'd fairly loft the
house, for 1 got to think of Molly
and what if she should swoon, and
then I got to worrying about the
other children. (I never saw so
many white horses iu one half-hour
all my life, and they always mean
trouble for me,) and my heart kept
hammoring harder and harder till I
really belivo the very clerks could
hear the thumping of it. So I
forgot half of my errands and start-
ed for home—or thought I did—
but didn't see my mistake until we
were well across the ferry, going in
just the opposite direction, of course,
from what I wanted to. It took mo
a whole hour, taking iu blockades
and balky 'horses, before I got back
to take the right car for home, and
fully another hour, (the draw way
off, and a little f:ar'tlicr on a load of
coal was dumped across the track)
before I got to my owu door.
'•I tried the key and it wouldn't
work. I rang . the boll 'violently
and no ono came. I rang again and
again, all the ' whilo growing •mare
oycitcd. At last I heard the !knob
of tho door turn slowly from the
inside. I fell almost at full length
into the front hall as the latch gave
•way, and the door yielded to my
viblentcroesdiug.
"As Molly helped late up I saw
she was crying, and I noticed she
held in her hand a piece of paper
about the •size of that telegram. I
said Molly what's happened 1"
Molly motioned for me to bo
„quiet and said, "Sh ! Sh !"
I captured a retiring policeman and
called to a neighboring gardner,who,
after much ado, extricated tho poor
woman.
Such were tho pccuilarities of the
Browns, These continued happen-
ings and frights worked sadly upon
the nerves of my good neighbor,
Mrs. Brown. Sho became a prey
to the content expectation of sumo
sudden trouble. Fires, burglary and
even murder haunted her imaging
tion ; and many times during the
early summer-TV/AS-sent for to sooth
and quiet the dote okl lady to whom
I became specially attached.
When these flurries of excite-
ment, as she called theta, wore all
over, we had many • a good laugh
over the ridiculous side of the pan-
ics. And it was always a "real re-
freshment to nie, when tired, to go
in and sit for a while with Mrs.
Brown, and listen to 'her graphic
descriptions of the "happenings"
in her household and the curious
fatality which seemed to follow
them wherever they wont. -
Coining back from our summer
vacation I was glad to welcome my
good neighbor, Mrs. Brown, for a
cal I,
11s
wo were cosily seated in the
back parlor, for an exchange of
summer experiences, the door -boll
rang, and the telegraph boy brought
a message. I sent a return message
and came back to the parlor, hold-
ing in any hand the slip of paper
upon which thomessage was written.
"Seeing that bit of paper in your
hand nacos me think of one of the
most ridiculous things that happen-
ed during the vacation,'° said Mrs.
Brown. "Just one of our kind of
scrapes," she added, merrily.
At ones I was on the q'ui vire for
her story.
"You know," she proceeded, "our
never
Quizzing A Cookney•
James Lindsay, 'Tho Viscount,'
a Glasgow merchant and wag of for-
mer days, visited London in comp-
any with two friends, and put up
at the City Coffee-house, where one
of the waiters was such a pure and
unsophisticated Cockney that they
resolved to play a practical joke up-
on him. 'John ,'said Mr, Lindsay
to him, 'bring three tumblers of
toddy.' 'Toddy, sir; yes, sir,' answer-
ed John. Would you like it haf-and-
haf, sir ?' Na, na, that would be
ower strong ; just mak it sax waters,
Joit.' 'Saxe waters, sir ; yes, sir,'
and away wont John to execute his
commission, but certainly without
the slightest idea of what he was go-
ing for. In a short time lie return-
ed with a look of regret on his face,
and said, 'I am very sorry, sir, that
the Saxe waters aro all done' and
wo have no other German waters at
present, sir ' 'That's a pity, John.
Wool, wo mann do without it, and
try a substitute. Bring ane the
whiskey, John, and the boiling
water.' 'Boiliug water, sir; yes, sir,'
said John and off ho set. On -re-
turning with.the necessaries of life,
AIr. Lindsay took them and said to
the waiter, 'Now, John, I'll ,give
you a lesson ; when ovybody asks
yo for toddy and sax waters, just
you gin them a big glass o' brandy
or whisky, and half a dozen glasses
o'brandy/water, wi' a wee taste o'
sugar in it, and they'll no ken the
difference. Indeed, John,' he add-
ed; with a sly wink to his compan-
ions,'I'nr no sure but they'll like it
just as meet, and at ony rate, its far
better for them than a' - your Ger-
man waters.' Joh.u,, .,:app.ar.utly.
thoroughly impressed with the value
of the information, he had received,
thanked \Ir• Liutlsay; and was retir-
ing, when ?Jr. Lindsay said, 'Oh,
John. before ye gang awa,' can ye
send me a wee tate 0' co' to. stip in
the nob o' ma shoon ; they'er uueo
shanchlin, and aiblins may gar Me
cowp i' the gianr when I gang agate.'
John, was s)mpletely dumbfounded
by this order, but true to his pro-
-fe'ssional instinct, recovered himself
and replied, 'Yes, sir,' as ile hurried
from the room. In a moment or
two ho returned with a glass of cold
water, which he presented with some
trepidation to the gentleman who
had given him the incomprehensible
ordor,•andbolted from the room be-
fore a word could be spoken, leav-
ing ''Mr. Lindsay and his friends
laughing till they' nearly tumbled
off their chairs. So nencli..._was
.Jolm impressed Ivith the superior
wisdom and surprising knowledge
of itis guests, that next morning he
confidently tasked Mr. Lindsay if
'there were any waiters in Scotland,
and whether London or Scotland
was the larger city ?'
BIG STRIKE.
"Is it a telegram, golly ?" 1
gasped. "Who's sick ? who's dead'?
who's drowued ?.;anti': they all dead'.?"
I exclaimed, in ono breath, trying
to prepare myself to hear the, worst.
I dropped into a chair nearer dead
than alive. ?folly pointed to the
back parlor, and said again, "Sh
"So they areall dead—all, Molly?"
Twailed. .
Molly whispered, timiilly, coax-'
ingly, "Oh, mother, do bo quiet,"
and pointed again tuw'ards the back
parlor, and again sibillated, "Sh,
Sh !"
O, I'M 80 TIRED
- -•-0F THIS
Drudgery of FRUIT CANNING !
WHY,
el -C) TO
ROBSON'S .a. CHINA .'. HALL
AND PROCURE THE
PURITAN FRUIT J•
AR,
THE MOST PERFECT SELF -SEALER in the market. \\'ith it Fruit Canning is a
real luxury. tirBe sure and ask for the Puritan Fruit Jar, Sole agent for Clinton:
We also sell the GEM JAR at bottom prices.
"I started up in a desperate way •
I was bound t0 know the avorst,
had been "sh'd !" long enough, and
I was not to be kept longer in the
dark."
"I made a frantic .rash through
the folding doors. The room was
dim with the half-light of the clos-
ed blinds. Yet it was light enough
so that 1 saw a •big, burly looking
1ati, down on his knees, where, un-
known to Molly, for I thought it
make het nervous, I had concealed
my • jewelry, bonds, and all the
money I had in the world.
• "A burglar is it, Molly,.'i burg-
lar 1 1 don't know how it hap-
pened, but when I found out the
room wasn't full of the dead bod•ica
of my children, and there was no-
thing but a burglar to contend
with, I felt as •though I had the
strength -of a giantess. So I step-
ped up to the man, with ono stand
reaching down under the sofa, in
rho vory act of stealing my valu-
ables, and I fastened with a firm
grip to to tho back of his Altar,
and with one jerk I tan led hint on
his back in the middle of tho room.
He gave a big groan that sonndcd
like amen, and las there with his
oyes closed. I didn't know but
I'd killed the fellow. In a minute
he opened his eyes and began to
gather himself to get up•.
"Now," said I, "whatever belongs
to you in this room you may carry
out of they door, but whatever be-
longs to the that you've takou,
you'll deliver up at once," and
my',voico was as firm as though I'd
been chief of the police.
N. .033801\T
OE-IINA. H.A .L, OTrINTON-
i
PORTANT ANNOeNCBENT.
In returning thanks to my many friends and patrons for past patronage, 1 would
like to call their special attention to my very complete stock of
HARNESS, WHIPS, CURRY COMBS, BRUSHES, ETC., ETC,
Speeial atteption is directed to my stock of
:-:SINGLE: HARNES
S:
It will be found very complete, and for durability and finish cannot be excelled by
any one. As I employ none but the best workmen, and use the best material to be
bought in the market, all who may favor me with their patronage may feel contiden
of getting satisfaction.
PRICES AWAY DOWN.
Trunks and Valises in great variety and Prices Law.
GEORGE A. SHARMAN
.. .. rrsta rr aal�
Farm, :-: Town
--AN D—
VILLACE PROPERTY
FOR SALE.
r ltIE EXECUTORS AND TRUSTEES of the
Estate of the late .Iusaeu Heim offer for sale
the following valuable property, namely :
Building Lots numbers 420 and 421, in the
Town of Goderich, quarter of an acre each, fairly
fenced and very desirable for building purposes..
Half acre Lot trotting Mill Road, Township of
Goderich, being part of lot 3 in the Maitland
Concession of the said Township. Nice frame
cottage and frame stable.
Lot number 3, south side of Millar street, Ban -
miller, quarter of an acre. Small frame dwell•
ing.
Building Lots numbers 803 and 904, in the
Town of Clinton, quarter of an acre each, beau•
tifully situated on south side of Huron street;
fairly fenced.
The East Halt of Lot 22, con. 14, west Wawan
osh; good land, 50 acres cleared and fenced, re-
mainder timbered; about 4 miles from Lueknow
and 6 from wingham; good roads.
A big strike was make when Powell
s Davin issued their Extract of nrsap-
nrilln and Burdock. It has rn•�t with
great success, and it must, for it is the
mos.'powerful blood pacifier in the mar-
ket, it is used with the greatest success
in all diseases arising from a debilitated
condit;on of the system, and everyone
needs, and should use a bottle or two at
this season of the year, of Powell's Ex-
tract of Sarsaparilla and Burdock. ilear
in mind one 50c. bottle contains more
solid medicine than most dollar so-called
Sarsaparilla and bitters. Also remember
that it is sold in Clinton by all druggists,
price 50c. a bottle. Sold by ail drug-
gists and medicine dealers everywhere.
44311y
—The Constitutional Corset
Works of Brussels artbooming so
well that the proprietor intends
putting in steam and extending itis
Iiusi ness.
For further particulars apply to
E. CAMPION,
41641 Barrister, Goderich,
RELIABLE.
"I have used Dr. Fowler's Extract
of wild 5trawbei•ry,and found it a sure
cure for summer complaint. I was
very sick, and it cured me entirely."
Alexander W. Grant, Moose Creek,
Ont. 460 -2t
•
BELL
ORCkNS
Unapprcached for
Tone and Quality..
CIATALOGUES FEE,
BELL 8t C
,, Guelph, 011t1 -
NEWSPAPER LAWS
Ws call the spceial attention of Post
nasters and subscribers to the following
cyliopsis of the newspaper laws :-
1—A - postmaster, is required to give
notice BY I.L1"1'r•.It (returning a paper flocs
not answer thelaw) when a subscriber does
not take his paper. out of the office, and
state the reason for its not being taken.
Any neglect to do so makes the postmaster
responsible to the publishers for payment.
2—If any person orOers his paper ilis-
aontinued, he must pay all arrenrages, 01
the publisher may continue to send it
until payment is made, and collect tic
whole amount, whether it be taken froir
the office or not. There can no lega.
discontinuance lentil the payme is male
• 3 -Ally person who takes a paperfron
'the post-ollice, whether directed t0 ii;
name or another, or whether he has sub
scribed or not, is responsible for the pay..
4 -If a subscriber orders his paper to hi
-stopped at a.ccrtain time, and the publish
er continues to send, ittlie subscriber i:
hound ta.pay for it if be takes It out of th
post -office. This proceeds upon the group
(Rut a man must tiny for what lie use:
e.TIu the Division Court in Goderich
at the November sitting a newspaper put -
fisher sued for pay of paper. The dc1enr-
ant objected paying on the ground that he
hal ordered a former • proprietor of the
parlor to discontinue it, The ,iudge held
that that was not a valid defence. The
plaintill', the •present proprietor, had no
notice to discontinne and consequently
could collect, although it was not denied
that defendant had notified burner pro-
prietor to discontinue. In any event
defendant was bound to pay for the time
he hail received tie paper and until he
had paid all armors due for subseription.
GENTS WANT1a-Ladles or Gcntleirun.-
1--1. Good commission and work cagy: .Address
Tutt Nines-llscotin, Clinton, 384
O! F OWL
CIiIIRCII DiRECTORIl.
St. Paul s Church. -Services ou Sundny at 11
a.m. and 7 p. in. Bible Class, 10 a.m. Sunday
School, 2,30 p.m. Service on Wednesday, 8 p.m,
RRv. WILLIAM CRAW, B. D., Rector
Rnttenbury Street Methodist.-$crvicet at10.30
R. m. and 7.00 p. in, Sabbath School at 2.30 p.
m. Ray. MR. Reragl, Pastor.
Canada Presbyterian.- Services at 11 min. anI
5.30 0. m Sabbath School, 2.30 p. m. Rsv
ALRx. $•riWART, Pastor.
Ontario Street Methodist. -Services at 10.30 a.
m. and 7.00 p. in Sabbath School, 2.30 p.m.
RRv. W. W. SPARTAN?, Pastor.
Baptist Church. -Service at 0.30 p. m. Sab
bath School, 2.30 0, m. IOW J. Gass Prieto,.
ni
-•_= CURES •
r14 t
r -a
CHOLERA INFANTU
D/ARRH(2-F/,
AND
ALLSUMMER COMPLAINTS
SOLD B,YfILZ DEALERS•
SH
• ---FOIt—
a 3lEEPSKINS,
TALLOW, tic.
Highest market price paid. Brin
them along.
A. COUCH, BUTCHER
CLINTON, 355tt'
St'8.Q`I:Aih NOTICES.
Pi PIES, Mir ‘a.
a sinipte VXOIiTABIii BALN
that will 1KMovw '1'Ax, Feneic.re, P181105 and
DIN'iO es, Icacir,g the Ain soft, clearand beauti
fel; also instructions for producing a luxuriant
growth of hair on a bald head or smooth face.
Address, including 30 stamp. BEN. VANDELF &
CO., 60 Ann street, N. Y. 392y
MANHOOD
Restored. A gentleman haring innocently 0011-
ti'acted tib habit of suit -abuse to his youth, and
in consequence suffered all the horrors of Sexual
lmrnpnci0 , Lost Manhood, Physical leecay, Gen.
ural l'rosti ;tion, etc„ will, out of sympathy for
his felb•w snffcrurs, mail free the reel] e by which
he was thn,!Ic ,'tried. .address in confidence J.
W. PiN IiNEY, 42 Cedar• Now York St... 390.
01111 G
,IAM M ,gt S l a
!'`�t15✓ az a tA
9
Market Square,
'ODERIOH.
1VES'L' OF ENGLAND SUIT -
i GS & TItOUSEli.INGS,
SCOTCH T\W'El?I) SU1.'I'INGS &
TIIOUSEIHNGS,
FIt1:NCIi ANI) ENGLISH WOB-
Made 1rj, in Best SIyle and lVork-
1l1anxl,1) at 4braharu Smith's.
Now in stork one et,' the cheapest'
and best stocks of
WINTER GLOTHINO
AND OLOTHS.
A Full Line of GENTS' FUR-
NISHINGS always in stook.
It will pay you to call on
ABBAHAM SMITH.