HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Lucknow Sentinel, 1962-09-26, Page 8PAGE EIGHT THE LUCK.NOW SENTINEL, LticK.No
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Don't ever let them talk You
• into making -a speech, old friend,.
.specially. if you have nothing
to. gay. It happened t� me, and
Pretty well destroyed the en-
tire.month of September.
•
I've been avoiding • speech-
• Making (for years.. My distaste
• for listening to speeches is
• only- exceeded .by my panic at
• the thought of having: td. .de-
liver • one. The 'whole, business
sp'eeches has grown into a
• Monster, an insatiable fiend..
The. Guest Spealte.r has be-
.
• eeine one ot the more • flagrant
•symbols of the .sickness of our
• ..' Canadian society. You can't get
Solar ' peOple to sit down 'in, "the
'Same room any more, without
• one Of thean suggesting that
you have a, guest speaker at
your •next meeting,' , '
All across this since -Carefree
• ,Country, the blight has Spread.
.A new 'species; called the Pro-
gram •Cicaninittee Chairitian.,
••surgecr. fto the . rfront in every
organization, 'Be is more -inipOr-
taut ; than .the president. He is
the . bird who. scrapes . guest
speakers from the bottoms of
• barreli :and 'othernative habitat.
He. is one Of those persona en -
;gaged in '. the greatest Manhunt
of the 20th century-7tryingto
find a' guest speaker;. any old
guest . •speaker, There is' an
"excellent chante that he will
Wind :up. • with an ulcer. The
!competition is More frantic than.
it' is among the • super -markets.
There is a fair probability
that diii Program Chairman will
stiffer a complete nervous break-
down within a' :few months
after hehas taken *the position.
• .This isusually a : direct result
Of: a) the 'gueat speaker • com-
ing •clown'• , the flu the
night ;of the banquet: or b)
• the guest speaker getting, a little.
oiled at the pre:dinner recep-
tion, and - including a couple of
off-color jokes inhi's • speech;.
or c) the ,.guest speaker turn-
ing out to be 'a real clod, who'
...- has nothing whatever to say,
1,6
:and says it•• at great length.
'
However, 1 have no sympathy
• for Program Committee Vhair-
men, who are completely
• inilous. in •their Methods. One of
the .iliote • slippery member i • ,of
the fraternity hooked and land
ed me With the skill of a• con
artist, and that's hOVir I came
' to ,. be standing In front of.a
ift hundred people ;the
other night, with my - hands
•
•
UGAR
and
SPIC
By Bill &flaw
hanging daW11, .m7 mouth hang-
ing open, and the entire aud-
lece hanging on my opening re -
Marks, • which 1 couldn't remem-
ber, •.'
This crafty character called
me last. .June and•asked- me
casually if I would. address the
'Canadian Club in •September. Be
had' ,picked his day, It was the
last day of a'choOl, I'dhad .a
couple • of beltS to celebrate,
and ,September seemed six Men-
ths : away; •"Shore. Shore, glad
to."- . •
wentback out to •the gar-
den,. pickedup m,y emptyglass
and enqUired„ "IleY, Suse; what
do yOu know 'about this Can-
adian Club?"
• She said, • `.`You knoW perfect-
ly well 'we can't afford any of
that. It's about five dollars a
bottle," •,
This wag:getting noWhere.
I thenlearn.ed. ,that ' the Can-
adian 'Club was an outfit In
town that Imports distinguished
speakers. This. made . .feel
like a hotshot :for about three
Minutes,. then • lire* me into a
•blind panic. HOW.e. ; I did have
the Whole surnmer to repare a
'sophisticated, scholarly address„
so I stopped worrying. „
.
'Unfortunately, time passed, as
if so, often does, .and I didn't
do a thing about it,. Two: nights
before the banquet, desperation
dreve • me to choose tOPic. 11
decided to 'talk. to the Canadian
C1ubabout Canada., :,This: was
throwing Swine before pearls,
,Put it was nice, big ,vague
ject, ..SQ I stuck to. it.
But I van tell yOu I felt wet=
ty foolish when I stood up m
/front ofall' those people. At
•their banquet last year, . •they
had really 'Obtained: their mon-
ey's worth a beautiful; blon=
de. speaker,. Colored movies,
dan-
eng girls,. special . Hawaiian. mus -
'le.
'
•
didn't. have even., one lousy
lantern4lide: I ' had tried .to
talk mywife into dOing„ a few
native Canadian, 'dances; to add
some •color. But the only na-,
tive dances we have are Indian
and she :refused to stomp -around
a fake fireplace in • her:: pare
akin and the- kids got into a,
Scrap- over „who was going to
play the bongo' druing, fd.r the
performance, ,so • .We had to
'wash out the whole busineas.,
"
It • was ativifi.d. , But . do you
know what I found, out?, People
'are extremely- polite. 'They will
sit . there fighting to keep their.
Octogenarian Off
To Worlds Fair
• (anotIon NEWS)
• Relatives and .friends attended.
a Shower for Miss 'Betty Dunlop
at Kincardine' on Saturday even-.
• Mg. .
13,PV. J. 11: Swann of Hanover
was in charge of the Anglican
• Services, on Sunday ,for the Har-
vest Thanksgiving services. So-
loists wereMrs. Jack Hewitt and
Mrs. Harold Haldenby. Special
inunbers were sung lby the chair.
Next Sunday the service will be.
at 9:30. , , • '
, Sunday Visitors with Mrs.. J.
W,• ,Colwell were Mr, and Mrs.
• Currie ,Colwell, Betty Anne ancl
Bryce, Mr. and Mrs. Dori Mc -
Cosh and . Mary Anne, avir, and
Mrs, Walter !Forster and 'child-
ren and 11VIr. and Mrs. Gordon
Patterson, • •
Bev. 'Benson Cox:,and his sis-
ter, Mrs. Ada Hodgins left on.
Sunday br a trip to Moose Jaw,
where' they will visit relatives.
Rev. Benson Cox will . also visit
• the Worlds Fair at Seattle.- •
..Mr. William E. (1-laldenby spent.
, few. dayswith relatives at
Sault Ste. Marie. • • •
Sunday visitors with Mr. .and.
Mrs. (Harold lialdenby were Mr.•.
I and Mrs. Ross ShelVfelt and Jim
•la Tiverton, Mr, and Mrs. Don-
ald Finkbiner of •Crediton,
and Mrs. Clare ,Sparling and (boys
1 Of Walkerton. . ••
•I Mrs. Gordon ,McDonald .was
hostess to the Kinlough 'Presby='
teriari for, their Septem-
ber meeting when Mrs. • Jack
Barr presided. The opening hymn
was "What a E' riend we have in
'Jesus" with „scripture from Isiah
1 and 38 taken by Mrs. Mark
Johnston who also gave a medi-
tation . on Isiah. Mrs: Donald / Fail. Feralization.Pdys
WEDNESDAY, 246th,
THE BEAVER is one of the most industrious of animals: ' •
He toils With loving care on the construction of a home for hisiamily.
Beavers mate for life, and their homes
are built with an eye to permanent use. .
• •
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When a man builds or buys a home, he, too, tikes to • •
tad that it IS permanent. For it is at home that the family 'develops roots
and friendships. Safeguarding the home for the family it but one
•• &Sun Lite's many services' for the security and protection
elyounalf and those you love. Let me tell you aboUt these service& • '
. J. Wm. Kinaha n
• •
R.R. 2, itreKNOW 4• • Phone Wingham .717-4y-4
51/11 LIFE ASSURANCE COMPANY OF CANADA
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THIRD MEETING dr.
•COLWANASHLASSIES
, .
The third meetingof the col-
.
wanash . Learning • Lassies Was
held at Mary •Andrew's. The . roll,
call, '`fMy favourite vegetable/and
how I like it • served," was .an,
sweredby sixteen. membera, The,
next meetinit :will be . held at
iMrs.,P. IVIacDonald's. A mother
and daughter (banquet will be'
held On 'October 16th at Bec-
kett's United Chureh. Notes 'were
'given on vegetables in • meal
:planning. • The vegetable: plate,
the oven dinner.
. • „
Instead '• of knocking,
doeSn't, opportunity kick the
door in like temptation does?
• • .
• Bushell had the prayer, Mrs.
Alex Percy read the:minutes. of
the August Meeting and the,
roll call was answered With a
•scripture verse Containing the:
Word:"teach" by 12. members, It
•was decided 'to have. ,Our
ber meeting a week later than
. Usual on :the 24th., as we have
accepted .an :invitation to iAsh-
field for their Thankoffering
Meeting on October48th at 23O.
• A special. bale.,Colleetion :was ta-
ken. Tentative : plans f�r the
• W'.1).1.S."-.Thaiikoffering as .a con.-
gregational 'simper with speaker
and program were rnade.for ear-
ly in November. Mrs. Perry Hod-
• ;gins read, a missionary letter
from -13,ay and Katrina Ward
•
about their work in Nigeria. Mrs.
Alex Percy was in ,Charge of
•the . following progrard.: Mrs.
••,TOinlylobonald read the history
Of the hymn Stand tip Stand up
for 'Jesug, Two v.erses, were simg.
•
Mrs: Per4i• read • a few verses
:from'John .a1so - a. short. inedi=
tation and prayer. Mrs...Gordon,
McDonald read an article on, a
source • of strength . and .SuSten-
ance. A Bible Quiz 'on Judges
• . and 14 followed and Mrs.
Donald McEwan • reada. poem
"Halbits." Mrs. Frank tilaulden
read the history Of, God be' with
You. Two verses were sung: Mrs.
Percy thanked the hostess and
those who had assisted: Prayer
closed the meeting and grace
was sung, after which refresh=
merits were , served.. • •
Mist Winnifred Perez Joan
and Brian spent Sunday .. in
'Woodstock. Miss Pearl. Scott
who has been Visiting at the
Percy home returned 16 Wood-
stock with thern. ,
• Mrs. Gilbert Hamilton, • Con,
and Miss Betty Hamilton of
Niagara" tFalls spent an evening
"with Mr.-. and 1VIrs. Jack Barr
and family. •
'Mrsjohn.Barr and Mrs, :Mor-:
ley tBushell visited • on Sunday
with ' Mr. and Mrs. Hass McTav-
ish at Shakespeare
eyes' open, .no matter how rot:.
ten a'Guest' Speaker you are,
They will applaud with . a nide
blend 'of relief and gratitude,
but' politely, when you finish,
•And they will have• one of
their members • stand up and
thank you, , without a trace of
irony, for your inspiring ad-
dress "Which '1 i,s tire we Will
all remernber."
RIPLEY MEAT MARKET
Custom Butchering
• Mondays Hogs, $2.00. .in 4O0:p..
.
Cutting and Wrapping, 2c pound, ,
CATTLE,' CALVE4 and LAMBS EVERY DAY, •
EXCEPT SATURDAY
We Do Curing and Smoking.. ... Beef, Pprk and Lamb.
Sold Whole, MAU or QUarter. For Better Service,.
• And Lower Prices C,11 Ripley 100,
Chas. 1-looilma, Prop.
MEMORIALS
Unsurpassed iti Beauty and Value
, • . , MORRIS
GRANITE And MARBLE WORKS
*Phone 51
• Representative
A. Ross MacLennan •
• 'Kincardine
A
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,free Soil. ,Sampling and the availability of a full line of fertilizers •
for fall sown grains.
4 •
Use CO-OP
ING SERVIC
for convenience
Whyis a Fall application of fertilizer so pr le?
TOP DRESSING MY AND PASTURE insures winter hardi-
nem and hence winter survival of the alfalfa and clover. The
increased soil fertility level also means extra spring and .supmer-
,
growth—higher yields/more feed per acre/more milk .per cow/
more gain, on beef. •
FALL PLOW -DOWN another important requirement for next
year's cash crops, Plow -down" prevents seed burning when a larger
amount of fertilizer than is safe to apply near the seed, is to, be
used. The fertilizer is better mixed in soil and where straw or corn
stocks are turned under, results'in a faster decomposition.
REMEMBER! CO-OP 'Bulk Spreading is fast, labour saving and
economical. You get CO-OP Fertilizer spread for you at approi
Mately the bag. price. Another of the many fanner:owned Co op
services. The complete CO-OP Fall Fertilizer Program also includes
Lucktiovv District Coo
Phone 7 1 W Lucknow
FERTILIZERS
166,
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