The Clinton New Era, 1878-08-01, Page 8Avqus1' 1, x878.
Net iUnen of a Trip, -
We heard a- funny story the other
day, which is certainly Ni'orth telling iu
print. During last winter:, a well-known
gentlenfail in^ Stratford, now d'eoetised;
received visits from a great number of
friends, and among them a soli, of tiro
Emeralcl Isle, and. an Orangeman to
boot. • After some conversation the
Stratford gentleman remarked that he
hadn't seen his friend for it .long time,,
where had be been 2 ' Oh, I've been
across the _say.' ' And .did yon enjoy'
your trip 4' ' Faix, you niay say that,,
The day I got.on shore it was tlae devil's
own row, and I took 'ti hand in, and
bedad. I was clapped in, gaol for .six,
months, and the. duly. 1 luaus let out 1.
left for Canada, and that's • all: I saw of
the ould co,unthry, good or bad.' A
roar of laughter, followed elle story, our-
ins which the Orap ne. 1iv'other'' took
himself offin high dudgeon, muttering
that he didn't gee 'what there• was to
laugh at.--St'rcttford Beacon:..
A Girt who Would riot take a•Dnre. '
The Olean N. y. Reeortt tells this
▪ story : ' I will 'marry any girl in the.
room that will have. me;' said . a half.'
tipsy young fellow, '' I'll takeyou,'
said a fresh, clear-eyed .young girl of
seventeen. And in half an hone the
two .were married and' being. Gofgratu-
lated by their friends. This'actually'
occurred only at few weeks ago. in the
near vicinity of Franklinville;' n'thfa
• county:.. Tho oeeaaion • wets ai• .country.
dance ; the participants were a farmer's:
.son and a farmer's daughter, teither of
whom bad exchanged A.wWrrl tv.ftli eacb
other .until_ the above scene :Occurred.'
The young had been .• drinking tied
thought be, would say sormathing.'slntirt;
and astonish the girls with his audacity."
The girl, liowever,.heard that.lie 'was n
' good fellow,' and being- moved by that.
spirit which ' will not take a :dare if
death conte,' took him et his word.:
They are now living. with the young.,
fellow's parents and are studying each
other's characters at their leisure, -
Tossing for n wit's
Dr. Dunlop, and his brothel thpiCap-.
tain, old bachelors, lived together on
their estate of Galbraith, near Goaerieh,•
Ont., with a, r espeetable Sootcb ' beak,.
as Vie doctor called her, •.for their house
keener. Now, whetlihr. any'Soatidal bad
been- raised, .or whether the doetor
thought it would conduce to .,their
greater. comfort if he or leis •brother
were to slurry the housekeeper, •,..or
whether he Ineaut it only,'fer a joke
to teasel bis hrothir, does not aplpept..
this as it may,. the . doctor• proposed,
in consegtienee, he said, of some,an-
pleasant remarks, and their lonely situa-
tion, for one of them to marry her.
Now, Sandy,'you know 1 wauld al-
most as soon hang myself as to Orli uty
Lead in the matrimonial noose, yet I
think it only fair to stand my elignco.
So, what I propose is,' that each of tis
shall toss up a copper three thine and,
he who' has the: most heads shall.. be
--free.'
As this appeared to be a fait.proposi-
tion, the ea.ptein at once consented to
the arrangement, and they immediately
proceeded to bring this friendly contest
. for a wife to an Issue. •
Tho c1 ctor would not have 'consentec '
to run, the risk of ioaing his 'liber':y;.'if.
he bad not been sure of winning, for by
some chance ho had become the possess°
ofn half -penny or 01 1 enn3 with a head on either
side, so when they Caine to.. teas,, tie
might, her xlpeetcd, the poor, unoonsctotrs
captain was duly elected for matrimonial
honors, to the great glee of the roguish
doctor, who, I make no doubt, cliuekle.d
over his successful stratagem..
Strange as it may' appear, they cap-
tain honorably .fulfilled this singnlat?'
engagement. I h'rvo understood that
the lady filled err new station with
great credit and propriety, and T have
heard, at the death of the two bbrothersa
inheriaed all the property. --•,Sir ieklantl's
Tworty-Se2't61L exra 2pi riCneulf1 -
'
Myths pre but Symbols of Truth.
As the scholar sees in the vain lint
beautiful mythologies of the ancients the
embotlied expreesloT'r:'3 of tfic`titingry Ifo=.
man soil, blindly groping' after• the Infr-.
nite, so the physician sees in that popular
myth of the sixteenth century the fonn-
talrt of perpetual health and youth ---an'
expression of the longings;of suffering fru-
inanity for a remedy that should forever'
prevent the incursion of disease. The
wilds of Europe were ransacked foi" this
wonderful fountain- and Potreo de• -•Leon
sought -for it in the cypress swamp* and.
tangled over -glades of our sunny Florida,
Men have searched for it everywhere and,
anywhere but where it really the
human body itself. The blood is the real
fountain of perpetual health and youth.
When this source is corrupted, tlre.pyin-
ful and sorrow -producing effects are
ble in many shapes. Thoroughly cleanse
the blood, which is the great fountain of
life, and ;,rood digestion, a fair skin, buoy-
ant spirits, vital strength, and soundhcss
of constitution, will all return to its, b'or
this purpose Dr. Tierce's Golden Medical
Discovery and Purgative Pellets are pre-
eminently the articles needed. 'l'hey aro
warranted to cure tetter, salt rheum, scald
head, St. Anthony's firer rose rash or ery-
sipelas, ring -worms, pimples, blotches,
spots, eruptions, pustules, boils, carbun-•
cies, sore eyes, rough aloft, scurf, 'scrofu-
lotus sores and swellirre's, fever sores, white
swellings, tumors, olri sores or swellings,.
affections of the skin, throat and bones,.
and ulcers•ef the liver, stomach, kidneys,'
• and lungs. •
Things Worth lenowlail.
Tin&dsll may bo scaled taucll easier
by first dipping them into boiling water
for about'•a minute,
That fish may as • well be coaled, if
desired, before; picking down in" salt,
in that ease -do not scald them. '
Titr►t stilt fish are quickest and .best
freshened by soaking in sour intik.
That mills which is turned or changed
maybe sweetened and rendered fit' for
use again by stirring in a little soda, :
That stilt will curdle new rnillt.
hence, in: 'making mills porridge, gra-
vies, dm., the salt should not be . added
until the dishis prepared. '
That fresh meat, if beginning to sour,
will a soeten if.elaced 'eat of doors in the
cool an over night,
That ole:'r' boiling water will- remove
tea steins ani many fruit:sta ns, Patti-
the
atttr
the waiter oyer the stain, and thn:s pre-
vent it spreading over• the fubrie.
. That ripe tomatoes.•will'''Nuiove int[
'Mid other stfiinsfrom white cloth ; also
from the hands.
Thai a' tablosIeonful of turpentine,
.boiled with:: your white astotlfrn will
greatly aid the whitening process.
That boiled. stitrcli is niueh .improved,
by the addition of a little sperm or a.
little stilt, or both, or a little ;gnat atidnc
dissolved. •
That beeswax and stilt i!nake .your
Tasty flat irons asclean and -s nooth as
glass: Tie lilinp of wax in au rag and
keep , it for the lion ose. When the
irons are hot, rub there fast with the
'wax. rag,_ead then seehe them with a
paper or cloth'eprinkleti sv1t1 glut:'.
That blue 'ointment and kerosene,
mixerl-in equal • proportions and oppli'ed'
`to bedsteads, is an tnlfailing bit; re,wedy,
and that a coat .of whitewash -is ditto
.;for' -tile walls of a log:house.
• That . kerosene will' so€ten, •boots or
• shot+s which hal-e. been `bardelaed• by wa-
ter, and mako•thefe as'lilieble as new.
• :That kerosene will taake your tin tea-
kettle es • bright as new: Saturate 'a
woollen: rag ,and rub with .it. It will 1
also remove .stains • from and Clean V ar-
.iiished £prnituree. • •
:That cold fain Water and soap will re-
move machine grease from any washable
fabrics.
k.ho:ICncwher JI'tisfftess
When `Coll.iris' want lone to •dinner:
Monday hp' found the house'tenantless,
the eoolt•stove cold, tied there was''a
lonesome iookleft fn the amriier'kitchen,
Hurryil •through• to. tae back:. yard: ho
saw his' n i1e':bl'aced against the fence,
holding. to, tiie end of a. 'broken 010(11es-
line to keep the newly -washed garments
from the ground.
" Yoti''te.•got:'here at last have'you V
ex:oh:time& the wife rte she cauglrt sight
of'Trim,''.
" Yes, flit here -l-• whet's the:matter?".'
he repeated.
"Here I've been holding this broken
line for over en hour.;—over a fell hour;
sir!" she snapped. ." I was determined
to die tight here before I'd let 'these
Clothes dawn '1"" • . • '
. "Bbt,whydtdn't yeu•cull some ones"
he innocently inquired: ." There's that
now futruily next door the woii)in
.world have come over til one tininute.'.'_.
,' tt Woman -next door;' out big •idiot,
you! Hasn'tsheebeen peeking Armin!?
and peeking -mound for two weeks:to
see my . wash and t'ye thiirk I'd .give)
heti a chance'td'come over here ,and see
for herself whether tbe.sleove8 .of my
nightgown were pieced down with un-
bleached Cotton 1 You don't know aiiy-
tili lg, sir, and. you make. tracks' for a
piece of tope, girl" , •
• r'
W011, I swan 1" growled Collins es
ho tiaelted '-•-;Detroit I'1'ee Nese.: •
Mitt :Fat Chemically Lxnulined.
The analytical chetnist; W. B. plain.,'
of Iltfflllo, Tti Y,, recently analyzed Al-
lan's 'Anti -Fat, and gave _the . following':
I have subjected A111an s Anti -Fat to
chemical analysis, examined the process
of its manufacture, and can truly say that
the ingredients of which it is composed
`ate.erititely-Ve'gotable,-anti: eaniaot'but•net-
favorably upon the system, and it is well
calculated to attain the object for which
it is intended. �V.33. I7Tt�SIE,
Sold by druggists, • . Chemist.
• Livnii, I8 KING.
'rho Liver "is the imperial organ of the
whole lluinarn system, as it controls the lite,
health .and happiness of man. lVkcui it is
disturbed in its proper action, all kinds of
tflm nt
s are the 1 fir
alresult.
fl1
a di-
gestion.offood,th.emovements ofthe heart
and blood, the action of the brain and ner-
vous system, are all immediately connected
with the working of the Liver.. It 'leas
been sueeessfally proved that Green's Au-
gust Flower is unequalled in.euring all
per.ons afflicted with Dyspepsia or Liver
Complaint, and all tho numerous syntpI
toms that result from art unhcalth Condi-
trout of tlio'Liver and stomach, Sample
bottles to try, 10 cents. Positively sold in
l towns on the Western Continent. Threes
dosed will prove that, it is -just wltttt you
want, ,
The progress made in ocean steam'
navigation is far more. surprising than.
most people are aware.. Atntheresent
day' fifteen times as iamb freight can
be Carried across the Atlanticin ono -
half the time, and at tike expenditure of
less thein one and a half times as 1ntiCh
filel,"as in 1510, This ]itis been shriven
by a comparison' orate data of recorifed
averages of the steamship I3ritatlnia in
1840,and of the 8teaulsttip 'Britannic in
1877.
THE CLINTON NEW ERA
RITEI IYZATISIV anti any outer inflam to i r,
disease Doted itr a font llunrs,.
Eryptppl,ta, syrotala, para+
ago, skin irritation, ttluproirern any causr,•und,8 bun"
OW other .iliscases ora sinood by' an Rett 1•:rtnent,
*Mph produces 1upu.m,natory notion. Mouton's Ab-
sorbent will positively effect )r. cure in s few home, Ly
Abet/thing t•:o split poison from the system, 8o11T• by
draggists. 1'rie�l,ZeOc, .ldlice to particular. (fascia the.
W L a)itlf N'roi ,
•
f Lontoo, Ont.
•
CABINET WART fU NITURE•&c
•i
14.
GEO.
.
ATTOULD It'ESP11CT 'VLLY INTIMATE TO •TnE
1 V residents of (flint ant viciuft3•, that,,•haviug
rebuilt bis premises on the eta about,.'
Vctoria Leet, Clinton,
139hasai),1ve1i.1?9n51a ntacnitflt,Glegtstest.tlf_.....
ATfOF Ft7R11.XTU E,
$uph as Chairs, Tables, Iled•rooin Sols, Lounges, \vliat;
, ,4. n,. nfu.,n1 .anterial. oxeellont woriunanahip and
IIA S R OC4I. 1:ENCla17 1313'STNE'SS
Which ie now to full•operntion, '-Prole Ilia long,expecf=
enconntl the facilities he pesspasew, he feefs eottpetcnt•:
to give sati,:titctign to all who inay,faver hila with their
patronage: '
Carrtiaffos; Waffolls;' Clatters Sleighs.
, t)PI:CI:ti1.'LY:
710rse=tSlcoedug (incl: «11110(19 of •Jelibbin j
Promptly 11ttenttcdta at; lecs.:m id'.ltifes. •
ti.
tondcsb.,ro, Out: la. 1877 -
Myth Flouring
r Ifhl subscriber .begs .to tender his most.
E'sirtecre:thanks to his numerous caste -
mots iii tho surrounding'.towllships and the
public generally fpr their, liberal patronage,
slid ,would further notify them that he leas'
lately adtled'inost importltntimprovements to
his mill by, putting ill a "new engine, double
•tlstrTower 1leretoforeused, and two ru11 of
Iiret•elase stone; with a complete sot of mer
chant l olts,.and in fact all the latest and most
imprevod mechiueryl• toge`1ier'with first-class
Turners, he is preparedto clo.liis class work in
.G't•RISTING; 0 a OP ING, &c.
Urists weighed in and out. • .Partied from a:
clistance can have their grists'and chopping
home with,thom thtr•saine day. -' flood Fleur
and. Mill reed. for sale at moderate prices:.
Tlie Subscriber would also inform the purr
lie that he has a large Stock of lnniher of
different bind§ and lengths :.' Pine from 10
to 20 ft.; hemlock, from 10' to 2c,.; c)lle v,.
BBiltternut, White Ash, maple, Soft awl Reek
Elm, in lengths tosuit the public which en-
ables him'to fill alt orders that he may be
favored:with on the shortest notice and roost
reasonable terms,
Myth, Aiig.20, line.
P. KELLY, Proprietor.
Canada Comps Lands,.
LIBT
OF 'LANDS 1N ItIIlto;v 701) SALE Det'
XX the CanatTatrompiinyuf8ty`lrapr0nat t1i7`trit}om°al-
it, nntlsfsignotl.
•
11ALE:
drintoxt,Jan.17,1871,
UXDE1ITAKINLi1
warn' SinuSOMIIER'EEGS trAvn TO STATE
.1, to theublic that ha kepr a constantly
large and superiorclassof Y on hand
COF.F TS CASKETS,
f
�,txn� -••% .
Coffin Trirnrnin a and Robes)
)
With a splendidriEAItS1;. Piniw'Corrrrrs always
on hand, Parcae can be sappl1ed la one hour, at
any time, at
TEN Erb CJENT LESS
Than eat be prophet at any'other' place.
A full stook o£,ITIINITURE.
Always on hand. ,
Ts10s,: STEVEN✓ 011.
C)1nton,1fay
Byrn tmmensa prltatlre. extend f t(.r••„.
Period el years, having within Plat nine 1rt.•
many thousand 001808 of those,ttaenSe perull..r
Kenton, .1have been enabled, to posh t t 1 in
potent and fgreeab.fe nut'itetne that Meets um
etclftleita Presented by that clas3 of Iu-•tin P4 ,):o- c
posttfve certainty anti exae•ttle•'s,
TO designate this eseural specific compound. 1
harDr.Pierce's Favorite. Prescrijatioi
The te▪ rm, however, is but a tepbie expresalon of
my high apprepiatioo:Of.its value; based upon"'
my ownpersonal observation. M a close ob.
•server; I love, while witnessing• its, positive re-
sults in the fewspecial diseases incident •t0 the
Separate organism of woman, singled it out as
the climax or crowning gout of my
medical career. t)u its merits, malt positive,
• safe; and eneetnttt 1.Omctty for • this ,class of dis-
eases, and one that will. at -all times' and touter alt
elfet mstaeces, act 'kindly ami Inharmony with
the laws wheel eeeern the female system, I am
trilling to stake my reputation as a phg8ician,
' Nay, even more,.soconfidenttulLt
ltwftLnot.
111sappoint the most eanguino eapcetatlons-•ef'•a -
singa invalid lady Who they. it for any or .the
ailments for whiell.I ree tumepnd ft, that I Dear
and sell it under A r4 r 'I VTC .GUs11{AlV.
TEP. If a beneficial sliest fa not experienced.
by the time two-thirds of the Contents of the bot-
_.atc.Are. 'used, 1 will, on return .of the bottle, two.
thirds of the medicine having been taken accord-
ing to directions, and the ease being one for which
1 recommend it, promptly. retuntl the money paid
*for it. Ilad I not the most perfect op:ma a:a.i0
its virtues, I could het 0110r it as 1 dol nder these
conditions, •but hltvinxtvttdessed its trtlIymiracn--"
loos cures in illoltsands of eases,/ fee,I war-
ranted alta pot'fRatio in risking
both 111�y repututiop surd my rtioney.011
its mortis. eetly-,',
' Tito .following .are an10n51 those; d180ast a• 14,
which iny•li'awori10tI'•rescriptton him 15111(0;•
ed cures, as if by lltag10,. Mal with 'a certainty
never" crone attained by any medicine,':, •I.On- :
corvhma, Excessive Flowing, Painful Ilontlil,'
I'eliotls, Suppressions when• from unnatural
0an001, 1rrognlariLles, Weak' Back, l'rolamels, ar
fallen • of the Uterus, Anteversion and lietrover•
sten, BTcaring Down Sensatfons,'I11101•naT 150:,!
Nervons' Depression, Debility, Despondency, •
ThreatenoP 1lisearin,ttre, Chronic CQongostionr,ln-.
fammntio'n and :D10017 tion of the Ut.01 tts,.lnipo
t0no), ,aimennosS, Stet tiny tVe,d:dess,
and,uty1nun,yotherofc.hlnntctilre1SOa140810 ifOttletilnl!i'
Woman not nientieneti here. In all affections' of
this nature, my' 1''hvntite Prescription \vrn•,.a:
euro, --lilo' niarrol of the wort i Phis
amdeinI t1,1V1 llilllll9 t,oax,, 1i5uo1uego hof P11)-
ose, bets » naoxst poh feet spetLlc nt all ch1Onle
oft the sesu tl, systefn of WOlIO tn,. 11 yrl)l
not disal p lull, ant^ ay illi ft do hovel'. in any state'
or t,ontifttun,
ThoSse Who do -ire tm ther inform atioh An 1h06o.
611 bl eels 094 Obtdllt•tt411 L'1{1: 1 hO •151:'4 t,a)LItaa •
Srti , 1Isout y1.,Ap Licit, t book of over 900.
ptgt. +Cut post-paid, en P8teiilt•of $1 80.• '1L
ttt tl' ,iliamtei1 •+f those 'tliae'*04-: l tecltlllar to
lens tit ...Hili Lyth nturh. valliablo navies. in re-
gard
eg rd to hu ts:w•t,ju lnt.n11,1 alas°':tirOetions..
• FA 1"051ZT1 Pit 3t'SCit1Il"i')ON 503.(03.
Ui ,1 ail, lsite.tIGASTS,'
471,, PIERCE; 11Ll,1.Prop'i,.
1; Uz' teAT t7; 1'.
•
'1 u
1. - iyitS Zl
• � . �•' —•,PGS � S . �1�1L� .
Uil p .
d r �
e d r
� w�
e
'everything necessary0Y buZZG
22 ' dr re -
'airing house, barn Or 'outhouse.
ers el s, Wrenches,
;.'crews; . •' Wash-
-quse ••
Furnishing '7' ilieludin' •
Stoves). • Tiia .ware .L nz s . Br2ts/Les, c 'c
1;; ..137S.
litillomiat: gad. Tools of au ids
-•--=3'haGratEriT.PMe tllie-for--
0C)7EILX211:71.11MIC (OM.
,
ALL.AY'S ANTI -.FAT •
Is lmrelyvclfetal1e and perfectly 1larlub'ss It arts
upon the food 111 the stomach, preventing 115 heing
converted into rat. Taken In mmorda ee 1511h til
rectIons,11wln reduce A fat person 1'renrt(Vo.tonye
pounds per, ,reek.
Corpulence 18 net only a (Mee (0itself, blit the
hprhing er of others." 1100 wrote: trimmer:tuns .taro
-thousand years ago, and 'what wastrue then Is none
•the less;