HomeMy WebLinkAboutThe Citizen, 2017-04-27, Page 5THE CITIZEN, THURSDAY, APRIL 27, 2017. PAGE 5.
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Here's a hairy history story
As we prepare to celebrate several
historic anniversaries, my condolences
to all those wives whose husbands are
growing beards to mark the occasions.
Many wives, no doubt, will be glad when
these experiments are over. They complain
their husband's facial hair scratches
them and generally gets in the way of
romance. My wife wasn't among the
complainers.
I was clean-shaven until Blyth celebrated
its centennial in 1977 with a big blowout that
included a beard -growing contest. Unlike
many wives, mine encouraged me to enter.
Maybe hiding as much of my face as possible
was worth the whisker -burn.
Also unlike the wives of many of the other
hairy contestants, mine didn't have the razor
handy an hour after the beard judging (which I
didn't win). She wanted me to keep it.
Maybe she doesn't scratch or tickle easily
because my beard didn't seem to get in the way
of romance. We had our fourth child a couple
of years later.
Some people, I suspect, think a man who
grows a beard is making a statement, trying to
set himself apart from others. For me, it's been
a convenience. I've replaced five or 10 minutes
a day of shaving with a once -a -week trim.
Add that up over 40 years and it means I've
gained the equivalent 43 days. (Question to
myself — what the heck did I do with the time
I gained?)
When it comes to time -saving, however,
I'm not as efficient as some beard growers,
because I do keep mine relatively short. Some
people really maximize the advantage of
growing a beard by never trimming it at all.
According to an internet search, the longest
recorded beard was grown by a Norwegian
man whose beard was measured 5.33 metres
(17 feet, 6 inches) in 1927. He must have had
the added advantage developing very strong
neck muscles from dragging that around.
Keith
Roulston
From the
cluttered desk
According to the same website, a typical man's
beard grows 5.5 inches a year. Had I not
trimmed my beard since 1977, I'd be slowed
down by pulling around nearly 20 feet of
beard, which would kind of offset the time I've
saved by not shaving. Besides, you might
strangle yourself in your sleep.
On the other hand, having lost a lot
of hair on the top of my head over the years
while I've been growing it on my face,
maybe I could have piled the extra facial
hair on top of my head to reduce the glare
when the sun shines. (I recently got my first
powder -job when making an appearance
before a video camera because the reflection
from my head was giving the camera operator
trouble.)
The people I don't understand are the men
who like partial beards — goatees, van dykes,
etc. This seems to me like the worst of both
worlds. You still have to shave the parts of your
face where you don't want hair growing, but
you also have to carefully trim the beard you
do allow to grow, so you probably spend even
more time on your face than the guy who
shaves.
And you don't get the cost savings. I
haven't bought a razor (regular or electric),
shaving cream or after -shave lotion for four
decades. Don't ask me where that money I
saved disappeared to.
It's strange how fashions evolve, even in the
male world that's not as attuned to fashion
changes as women's. Back in 1977 growing a
beard was almost considered a radical thing to
do. People were apt to think you were
becoming a hippie. I'd grown up in an era
when shaving was so universal that I don't
know if I can even remember seeing a man
with a beard. Gillette, the razor company,
was one of the biggest advertisers of the era,
especially for sports programs like the
World Series and the weekly boxing
broadcasts.
But my father's clean-shaven generation
would, in turn, have looked like radicals to his
grandfather's generation when most men grew
beards of one sort or another, many of them
big, bushy and full. Maybe they were saving
time in those practical pioneer days or maybe
they couldn't face the daily task of shaving
when hot water didn't flow instantly from a
fawcett and you had to manoeuver a dangerous
straight razor around your throat.
There may have been other practical
reasons. Recently reading the book The
Stranger in the Woods: The Extraordinary
Story of the Last True Hermit I learned that
Christopher Knight, who walked into the
woods in 1986 and hid there for nearly 30
years kept himself clean shaven most of the
year. He grew a beard, though, during the
worst of mosquito and blackfly season to
provide a protective barrier on at least part of
his body from these voracious pests and in the
winter to insulate his face. Maybe he should
have left it growing all summer too, because
the University of Southern Queensland found
facial hair can block up to 95 per cent of the
sun's harmful UV rays. (Apparently growing a
beard reduces acne and other infections that
are spread by the razor while shaving.)
So all you guys out there who are growing
commemorative beards, good luck and
welcome to the club. Yours will probably
disappear by the end of summer. Mine will
stay. Aside from the other advantages, showing
my real face at this stage might be too
frightening for the neighbours.
Gha-Ghing! The sound of money
Cha -Ching! Cha -Ching! Cha -Ching! Can
you hear that noise in the middle of
some conversations? I certainly do.
Sometimes, it's a conversation at home
where a matter of some debate could cost the
household more money.
For example, I've been working, on and off,
on fixing a hard -to -find leak in my bathroom
for a number of months with some familial
help. I've spent some money replacing things
that needed to be replaced either due to the
leak or due to fixing the leak, but a wholesale
rip -down and rebuild of the bathroom was
never something I had considered.
My wife, on the other hand, has big plans for
our bathroom (and some surrounding spaces).
Every time she brings it up, however, I can
scarcely hear her ideas over the "Cha -Ching!
Cha -Ching! Cha -Ching!" noise that
accompanies it.
It's just a difference of perspective —
Whereas my wife would rather spend the
money up front and have a job done quickly
and (in some cases) with some kind of
guarantee, I'd rather call in the aid of my
family and tackle the job in a more DIY -
fashion (that's do-it-yourself).
However, as my wife points out, when I
tackle these jobs, be it with or without help,
they don't regularly get done quickly.
The leaky bathroom is an exception because,
after replacing one piece of the floor, I never
want to do that again, so I am trying to deal
with it as quickly as possible.
Some people may say my drive to handle
these issues on my own is attributed to my
gender as a man; that men are somehow hard -
coded to want to do these things ourselves.
However I don't think it's a gender thing, I
think it's more a chronic addiction.
There is a tremendous amount of satisfaction
in finishing a job and fixing a problem that
Denny
Scott
Denny's Den
existed. Whether it's fixing a website, a
computer or finding a pesky leak in a shower,
looking back and knowing I accomplished it
with my bare hands is a pretty big rush.
There's also no cash register noise whenever
I look towards my bathroom.
During a recent presentation to North Huron
Council, Napier Simpson, a representative
from Regional Tourism Organization 4, a
rather clinical name for the tourism entity
responsible for, among other areas, Huron
County, said he wasn't asking for money.
He was approaching councillors to make
sure they knew what opportunities they had
closing in with the Blyth Cowbell Brewing
Company opening on the south end of Blyth,
the renovations at Blyth Memorial Hall, the
ongoing work on the Goderich-to-Guelph
(G2G) Rail Trail and the Grant and Mildred
Spading Centre housing the Canadian Centre
for Rural Creativity opening up.
While I don't dispute anything that Simpson
said, I find it funny that he said he wasn't there
asking council for a financial commitment.
I find it funny, because, when he started
talking, I once again heard the tell-tale Cha -
Ching! Cha -Ching! Cha -Ching!
It's a good thing the meeting was recorded
because I had to listen to it a few times to work
out all the ideas he presented.
Chief among them (in terms of how loud the
cash register sound got) was the idea of
making the southern entrance of Blyth a little
more inviting.
Don't get me wrong — growing up I seldom
travelled north of the soccer fields and he is
right. People could be completely unaware of
the great village north of that hill where
County Roads 4 and 25 meet.
However, coming forward and saying you're
not asking for money, then suggesting
significant work is kind of misleading. Sure,
Simpson's hand wasn't out, but that doesn't
mean he wasn't suggesting a significant
infrastructure project.
While I don't disagree with his assessment
of Blyth and how it can benefit, I think he was
approaching the wrong people and saying this
work needs to get done.
These kinds of projects need to be handled
by the community.
Whether its through the Business
Improvement Area, local service groups or just
a group of concerned citizens, people want the
option to contribute to projects like these and
feel some ownership instead of having it
forced on to their taxes as another budget line.
The people of Blyth have proven that it's
ready to support initiatives that benefit the
village and that's where we need to look first.
It also gives some agency to individuals. If
they feel the southern entrance to the village is
good the way it is, they can decide not to buy a
raffle ticket, but if they feel strongly about it,
they can buy a whole book.
When it comes to taxes, we should be
covering our services and infrastructure, not
making donations. Community projects need
to come from a dedicated community willing
to work for it. Just look to initiatives like the
Alexandra and Marine General Hospital
Foundation's CT Scanner drive that raised $5
million to purchase the hardware.
Let it never be said I don't offer solutions on
how to get those taxes under control.
Shawn
Loughlin
AlAkili Shawn's Sense
Use it or lose it
n reading a book about the importance of
soccer in South Africa's notorious Robben
Island prison, I found surprising parallels
with several treasured institutions throughout
The Citizen's communities — believe it or not.
The book is called More Than Just A Game,
written by Professor Chuck Korr and Marvin
Close. It details the prison as a human rights
hellhole in the early -to -mid-1960s and the
formation of the Makana Football Association
(MFA) and all that changed as a result.
The book begins under the cloud of
apartheid in South Africa, which was enacted
in 1948. The system institutionalized racial
segregation and discrimination, which in turn
spawned freedom fighters battling against the
atrocities happening to those of colour. When
someone was caught pushing back against the
government they were sent to Robben Island.
On the island, conditions were horrifying.
Whether it be brutal, organized and
unprovoked beatings of prisoners by guards or
the rancid food or lice -infested clothing
provided, political prisoners on Robben Island
were not treated like people during that time.
In order to find a common ground of
humanity and provide the prisoners with some
much-needed recreation time apart from their
back -breaking work in the island's quarries,
several prisoners organized and brought forth
the idea of organized soccer on Saturdays.
While the road was bumpy and the prisoners
were met with resistance, as the title of the
book suggests, what happened with the MFA
went far deeper and accomplished more than
simply the organization of soccer in a prison.
The association led to improved conditions
within the prison. Guards saw prisoners as
people, recognized the importance of soccer
on the island and even began to relate to their
favourite player or team.
After a few years, however, prisoners
integral to the formation of the MFA were
released and there was an influx of new people
to the prison. To them, soccer on the island was
taken for granted and then abandoned in favour
of other interests (the association had
eventually expanded to include rugby and a
summer games reminiscent of the Olympics).
The problem is that these prisoners had no
idea what the MFA meant to life on Robben
Island. They knew not of pre -MFA life in the
prison. They hadn't been made to eat rancid
food or jostle with one another for sandals
made from discarded tires.
Think of the parallels to a community like
Blyth for example. So many things residents
now enjoy were not always here. We now take
for granted the infusion of tourists every
summer thanks to the Blyth Festival or what
arrives every week in the form of The Citizen.
And those are just two examples. Think of all
that area service clubs do for us. They haven't
always existed either — and many are now
fighting to keep the few members they have.
Many reap the benefits of these innovations
and projects and don't know what the
community was like before them. Think of
projects like Cowbell Brewery and the
Canadian Centre for Rural Creativity, not to
mention millions of dollars in renovations to
Memorial Hall. Or what about the expansive
barn relocation project in Brussels?
In 25 years, perhaps new residents too will
take these projects for granted and not know
the initial importance of them — ignorant of
the work, vision and money it took to make
them a reality. These things weren't always
here and it can be like that again if we don't
use and appreciate what we have and respect
the work of those who came before us.