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HomeMy WebLinkAboutLucknow Sentinel, 1892-01-22, Page 3• "Maggie Illurphy's Home: a song that was asked for) Behind a grammar sehool-house, • In a double tenement, I live with my old mother And always pay the rent. ' A bedroom and a parlor Is all we call ourown, _Ana you're welcome -every -evening- - At Maggie Murphy's home. .,Chorus - On Sunday night, 'tis my delight And pleasure, don't you see? Meeting all the girls and all the boys That work down town with me. There's an organ in the parlor, To givo the hc•uss Woe, And yeti re welcome every evenipg At Maggie Murphy's home. yinnuaa..,taava ,I,OCC.W,C..aMaaala,aaaa,rna,,„:,,,CVaiaftlaaa,.."Pa.,. ISue ancing m the parlor, There's a waltz for you and 1; Such mashing in the corner, And kisses on the sly! Oh, blessed leisure hours That working -people own And they'ns welcome every evening At ,Maggie Murphy's home. - Chorus. It'a from the open windoW, At the noon -time of the day, You'll see the neighbors' children So happy at their play. There's Jimmie with, his Nellie, Together romp and roam; ------And-tte;,. gather in the. Near Masurpligis home. I walk through llogan's alley, At the closing of , he day, To greet my dear old mother. You'll h war the neighbors say: Oh! tilde goes little Maggie, I wish she were my own; Oh, may blessings ever linger O'er Maggio Murphy's home! SUPERFLUOUS WORDS. A- Plumber Farmer and the Cod Fish Sign. 721onetecry Times : "Office Boy" writes to us from Hamilton in a holiday mood, eaying "Your amusing article about the Barber's Sign' in your issue of 18th Dec- ember reminds me of a somewhat similar atory, which I enclose" : A grocer in 11 , named M , having received a consignment of codfish, piled a quantity in front of his store and placed a black -board OR top of the heapwith , this inscription: . ••• • •••• • •• • • 11-• "COD FISH FOR SALE HERE." ..., . A well-known plumber named F—, who is quite a wag in his way, happened along, and accosted the storekeeper, a friend of his, with " What's.the use of wasting chalk writing the word "here," as no one expects you to advertise the stock of a merchant in .the next block ?" The accommodating grocer at once rubbed out the superfluous word, and the sign read : - • "COD FISH FOR SALE." ." • Even this did not satisfy tir''-e critic, who at once remarked, What on earth is the use of the words'on SALE ' ; do you sup - Lease people think you give your goods away!? ' Two more words disappeared from the sign, and this is what remained, in pure., unvarnished English: "COD Fisii." !IP, The grocer, perhaps, thought this would satisfy his tormentor ; but no, the hard -to - please one let fly his parting shot, "to you imagine, sir, for one instant, that the inhabitants of this Ambitious City do not know a cod -fish from a sardine ? The plumber did not wait to see the result of this crusher, but history tells us that the •sign on the blackboard for the rest of the day was: "13 • • M.. • • A SUICI DIE-WITIMA MORAL. the Perils of Mixed Relationships -How a Man Lost Ills Own Identity.' One William Harman, after suffering a protraeted siege of melancholy, is reported to have finally taken his departure from things mundane because of the mental dis- tress resulting from the deep-seated convic- tion that he was his own grandfather. The following note, which was found beside his cold, dead body, explains itself: The troubles which have ended in the taking of my miserable life began when I married a widow who had a grown-up daughter. My father visited our house very often, fell in love with my stepdaugh- ter and married her. So my father became my son-in-law, and my step- daughter my mother because she was my father's wife. Soon afterward my wife had a son ; be was my father's brother-in- law and my uncle, for he was the brother of my stepmother. My father's wife, i. e., my stepdaughter, had also a son ; - he was, of course, my brother, and, in the meantime, my grandchild, for he was the son of my daughter. My wife was my,gro.ndmother, because she was my mother's mother. I was my wife's husband and grandchild at the same time. And as the husband of a person's grandmother is his grandfather, I was my own grandfather. It is well to have plenty of relatives; ,and it is always fortunate when ono can be on good footing with them. The trenble with poor Harman was not in an excess of rela- tives, but in getting so badly mixed up with them as to lose his own identity. The moral of this sad demise should not be lost. -Boston Globe. 4 GOOD ROW may. - uow a Poor Apprentice Boy ZOSSELIS a Partner. Why city boys are preferred to country boys. " This is what %lawyer said about the story that,1 am about to relate to you, " III dm Ina•Uy tery 1 eler. beArd." '! We have a good many boys with us from time to time," said Mr. Alden, the senior Mem- ber of a large hardware eatabliahment in Market street, Philadelphia, "as appren- tiees to learn the business. What may sur- prise you is, that we never take the country boys 'unless they live in the city with some relative, who take care of them and keep them home at night, for when a country •new to him, and he is attracted bv every show window and unusual sight. A city boy, accustomed to these, cares little for them, and if he has a geed mother he is at home and in bed in due season. And we are very particular about our boys, and before accepting one as an apprentice, we must know that he comes of an honest and industrious parent. The best boy we ever had is now with us, and a rreinber of the firm. • He is the one man in the establish- ment that we could not do without. He ei yealaii1i When h -e was ap- T..ezi2V2ce3,' Ao us and he waa with us for eleven years, acting for several years as salesman. When he first came, we told him that for a long time his wages would be very small, but that if he proved to be a good boy his salary would be increased at a certain rate every year, but as it turned out, when, according to agreement, we should have been paying him $500 a year, we ,paid him $900, and he never said a word about an increase of salary. From the very out- set he showed that he had an interest in the business. He was prompt in the morning, and if kept a little over time at night it never seemed to make any differ- ence to him. If information was wanted it was to this boy, Frank Jones, that every- one applied. The entire establishment seemed to be mapped out in his head, and everything in it catalogued and numbered. His memory of facts was equally remarka- ble; he knew the name of every man who came to buy goods, what he bought and where he came from. I used to say to him, Jones, your memory is worth more than a gold mine ; how do you manage to remem- ber ?' I make it a business to remember,' he would say. I know that if I can re- member a man, and call him by name when he comes into the store, and ask him how things are going on where he lives, I will be very likely to keep him as a eustomer.' And this is the exact case. „He made friends of buyers. He took the same interest in their purchases as he took in the store, and would go to no end of trouble to. suit them and fulfill to the letter everything he promised. Well, affairs went on in this way till he had been with us eleven years, when we concluded to make him a partner. We knew that ,he,liad Jio extravagant habits, that he neither used tobacco, nor beer, nor went to the theatre. He continued to board at home, and even when hissalarywas at its lowest he paid his mother $2 a week for his board. He was always neatly dressed, and we thought it very probable that he had laid up $2,000, as his Salary for the last two years years had been $1,200. So when we made him the offer to become la partner in business, and suggested that it would be more satisfactory if he could put some money in the firm, he replied, If $10,000 will be any object I can put in that much. I have saved out of my salary $9,400, and my sister will let me have $600.' I can tell you I was never more surprised in my life than when that fellow said that he could put in $10,000, and most of it his own money. He , never spent a dollar, nor 25 cents, nor 5 cents, for any unnecessary thing, and kept his money in .the bank, where it gathered a small interest. I am a great believer in the Bible, you know, and always keep two placards in big letters up in the store. One is this text: 'He that is faithful in that which is small, is faithful in that which is much.' On the other: "He that is diligent in business shall stand before kings, and not before Mean men,' And Frank Jones' success was the literal fulfillment of these two texts. He had been faithful in the smaller things as in the greater ones, and diligent in busi- ness. That kind of a boy always succeeds," continued Mr. Alden. A small boy of yen, who had listened to the story with eager eyes as well as ears, said, "But we don't have any kings in this country for diligent •boys to stind' before." "Yes we do," laughed .Mr. Alden, "we have more kings here than in any other, country in the world. We have money kings, merchant kings, and railroad kings, and land kings, and business kings, and publishing kings, and some of them wield enormoue power. This is a great country for kings."- Wide - Awake. The post -office at Gibraltar is in charge of Miss Cresswell, who is paid a salary of $2,800 for her work. In addition to her regular duties she has charge of the Govern- ment telegraph office and sevefal subordinate pot -offices in Morocco. . The tnapress Eugenie's small and elegant feet, once the admiration of the French court, has now, it is said, become au ellen out of shape by gout and rheumatism. This foo the days of its fain°, was so Cinderell ike in its tininess that its dis- carded shoes could be worn only by children, for there was no woman in all Eugenie's • train whose foot was small enough to fit' them. A western lecturer has "selected for his subject, "A Bad Egg." This subject often strikes a lecturer unfavorably. The smallest parish in England is Wil-. sot, Oxon. It contains seven persons. House and Moine. Clean piano keys with a soft rag dipped in alcohol. To clean a black dress, use a sponge dipped in strong black tea, cold. A piece of sionge fastened to a. stick is a good thing to clean lamp chimneys with. To take out scorch lay the article that has been scorched in the bright sunshine. Wipe flatirons on a cloth wet with coal oil and they. vvill not scorch the clothing. For poisonous wounds made by insects such as mosquitos, etc., apply collogne- water. To clean brass gas fixtures rub them with cut lemons, and then wash them off in hot water. Oil cloths should be rubbed off with a flannel cloth dipped in .sweet milk once a week. -Rub well. Take egg stains from silver by rubbing with a wet rag .which has been dipped in common table salt. In doing up fine lace do not use any starch, but in the last rinsing water dis- solve a little fine white' sugar. --Home Queen. • Always "Turn the Rascals Ont." Chester (Pa ) News: Fifteen' years age the 0Overnment of Jamaica introduced the Egyptian ichneumon to rid the island of the cane rat. Now a prize has been issued for the successful extermination of the ichneu- mon. In the secluded village of Oodwada in India, there is a sacred fire that has keen burning for kwelve centuries if the stories of the Parsecs are true. REMNINED AT LAST. VE ittoi7 or Real Life Which Reads like a Romance. That was ao interesting part_rthat eat down to dinner on New Year's Day in the neatly furnished home of Mr. -and Mrs. Hall, on Hanov-er street, Boston. The party con- sisted of Mrs. Mary Hall, the mother ; op her right was young Charles, on her left Minnie, a prettymiss of 14, while opposite the mother sat "Jim" Hall, the husband and father. This was a reunion dinner, for "Jim " Hall had, been absentior 10 years, and ditring that tine strango occurToncos had taken place. The day was also the an- niversag of their weddiegl, and wbe22, the IltrenouitiMOOMUCk °venire- eienaef their lives since their marriage fifteen yeara ago, tears of joy andsorrow strove for the mastery as they fell from overflowing eye- lids. The story of the lives of this little family is worth telling, for it is very strange and unusual and shows a new phase in the affec- tions of human families. " Jim " Hall was a fisherman, and after five years of happy married life, he shipped on a Gloucester vessel for a trip to the Western banks. While awa_y from the vessel ha a dory, after striking fish, a fog set in, followed by a blinding storm. There were two in the boat, and row which way they would they could not find their vessel. Two days of suffering and his companion died. Another day and Hall became unconscious. He awoke in the cabin of a New Bedford brig, bound to the Attic seas on a whaling voyage. He was rescued, but terribly frozen. Misfortunes and disappointments followed. The skip - Per of the brig held him a prisonerfor two voyages from the Azores and five years had passed when "Jim" Hall returned to his native town. He sought his wife and child- ren, but they could not be found. , He learned that the fishing smack on which he left Gloucester returned in due time with colors flying at half-mast, and the report of the loss was duly made. Then he learned that his wife mourned his loss for three years, and, becoming satisfied that her husband was lost at sea, she, for the sake of her children, accepted an offer of marriage and had re- moved to Belleville, Kan. The money saved, from his long voyage gave "Jim" Hall the opportunity he wanted. The first train he could get, after, e his inquiries had elicited all the information necessary, bore him to the West. He located his wife as Mr& Winsor, living very happily with her new husband. The rest cif the story may be given in Mr. Hall's own language: "Then came the crisis of my life. Would I call at the peaceful home and announce myself, or, wait and try to out- live the man who married. my wife and cared for my children during the hours of need? I got a job ten miles out of the city, and my only pleasure was to keep a watchful -eye over -my -family and stand ready, if need be, to lend a helping hand. Nov. 15th he died.' I attended the funeral, and after waiting a few days I sent a note stating that I was near, and would call the following evening." The sequel of this strange story is the reunion of • the family around the family dinner table on New Year's Day. "May they live long and prosper," will be the wish of many who will read this remarkable chapter from real life. Hoy to Carry an Umbrella. It isn't so hard to be graceful. So many articles have been written on the subject, so many Delsarte and other theorists have lectured and talked about it, that one would imagine that to cross the room with- out falling over chairs, stepping on toes and smashing the bric-a-brac was impossible to the average mortal. It is chiefly a matter of dignity, unconsciousness. lf your clothes fit and your respect yourself and are in love and charity with your neighbors, there is no reason why you should appear awkward in public. There, however, a few rules which, if observed, make all the difference between an absence of awkwardness and the presence of positive grace. For instance, how do you carry your um- brella? Closed, of course, it becomes a mere engine of destruction in your small hands. Any woman knows how to carry a folded umbrella. But how many knew that, open, it should be carried in the hand farthest from the sun? Thus, if the sun is shining on your left, hold the umbrella in your right hand, the stick crossing the body. Now try the Opposite way and ob- serve into what a tight awkward angle the arm is forced, and how much less easily the umbrella is managed. Changed His Name. There is a man a compositor on one of the old dailies here who very ouddenly had his name changed. This was nearly twenty years ago. He went into the office for work. The foreman gave him a case at once, and he set type for a week. When the foreman was ready to make up his pay roll he asked this -man his name. The printer is a Pole and is or was blessed with ,one of the most jaw -breaking ones of its class. In reply to th'e foreman's question he said: "My name is Kantzenwokowski." "Not by a jugful," said the fOreman, realizing what it would be to put that name on paper every week; "your name is Brown." And as a matter of fact that printer has been Brown ever since. He still works in the same office, but Brown he became and Brown he always will be. It is doubtful if he himself can even remember his real Polander game. -Chicago News. Novel El ctioneering. Washington Post : This is how John C. Kyle,' the oiew member from the Second 'Minnesota district, secured nis election : Hemade the rounds in a buggy, with a big, stout negro to drive him. He went right to the fields of the white voters, and, driv- ing Up to where the soVereign was plowing, he wmild introduce himself and then he would make the negro take holi of the plow and turn many a furrow while he and the farmer took ti smoke under a ebade tree and talked over the situation. It worked like a charm, and though Mr. Morgan trie'd to hold on through the Farmers' Alliance he was " not in it "at all when it came to " show down." Kyle and his awarthy travelling plow hand had captured the horny handed voters. "Lady Leapyear " wishes to know if we think girls should propose. Not unless they can support a husband i;auFfaal....araaar...uf oti Yf. ,4•Easa, WITE1017T AN EQ-170,.AL qTJAC OBS RE, Ri4EUMATIS TRADE- AtAlot iNiEUBALCIAV — 110 - LUIVII3ACOF REMrPAIIJ SCIATICA, , Sprains, Bruises, Burns, Swellings. -rtiE CHARLES A. VOCELER COMPANY, Baltimore, Md. Canadia 13111MSEVIMP ' MAN SHOULD NOT LIVE ALONE. Chief Inspector Byrnes a Strong Advocate of Second Marriage. Inspector Byrnes has very decided views in regard to second marriages. To a New York Mercury reporter he said: "1 would not have any man or woman live alone, if I could direct things a little more on this planet. My dealings are -pook-sle-its-trou,w,,e 014.11.11 VehOLI. get a fellow m a c,orner, if he has never been married, I say to him the first thing, Why aren't you married? and if he has been, and his wife is dead, I say, Why in the mischief don't you, marry again? You wouldn't be in this hole if you had a good wife and a home." And it is alwaya so,' said the inspector. Many a good fellow has gone to the devil, where he'd have kept all straight if he'd married again. He feels he has no one to welcome him when he gets back, and there's always good cheer and a welcome to be bought out- side. That's the slippery road, and he takes it just to kill time. He doesn't know where it's going to take him and he gets landed in wbad spot before he knows where he is. It's not good for any man to feel the domestic responsibility lifted off him. That's his safeguard, and where he hasn't it he's very often up% to shake off social and moral re- sponsibility as well. "Yes," said the inspector earnestly, "1 strongly advise second marriages." The English soldiers in the Soudan were supplied with St. Jacob's OB. The Old, Okt Story. Troy Times: The preacher who merely turns the sermon barrel the other end up when a new year rolls around must not be surprised if most of his congregation consists of empty peWs. Never permit the system to run down, as then it, is almost impossible to withstand the ravages of disease. Dr. Williams' Pink Pills stand at the head of all medicines as a blood builder and nerve tonic, correct- ing irresplarities, restoring lost energies, and building up the system. Good for men and women, young and old. Sold by, druggists or sent on receipt of price -50 cents -by addressing The Dr. Williams Med. Co., Brockville, Ont. Not as He Looks. Rochester Herald: Mrs. Gobbs-It is very strange that your friend Dobbs never married. Mr. Gobbs-Oh, you don't know Dobbs. He isn't half such a fool as he looks. Across the C,ontinent. Win. Renwick, M.l)., M. R. C. S. E. Vic- toria, 'B.C., writes : have used ilfiller's Emulsion of Cod Liver Oil in cases of indi- gent patients with he most gratifying aesults. It does not upset the stomach, is easily asaimilated and possesses undoubted power in rebuilding weakened constitutions, where the ordinary form of administering Cod Liver Oil is not admissable. For the future, whenever I have occasion to pres- cribe any preparation of Cod Liver Oil, I will give Miller's Emulsion the preference, being perfectly satisfied with its therapeutic efficacy. In big bottles, 50c. and $1 at all drug stores. The ten lines of railroad centering in London send out 2,210 suburban trains a day, carrying 400,000,000 passengers a year. Pneumatic tube transit companies are becoming more numerous, and the latest in Chicago contemjilates a system from the Illinois Central Railroad depot to the World's Pair. A thousand carriers may be loaded into the main tube as rapidly as corn can be dropped into a hopper, and in a few moments be transported seven miles. The world's press is stated to include 37,000 newspapers. errnan ru " Here is an incident from the South —Mississippi,,written in April, t89o, just after the Grippe had visited that country. "1 am a farmer, one of those who have to rise early and work late. At the beginning of last Winter I was on a trip to the City of Vicksburg, Miss. ,where I got well drenched in a shower of rain. I went home and was soon after seized with a dry, hacking cough. This grew worse everyday, until I had to seek relief. I consulted Dr. Dixon who has since died, and he told me to get a bottle Of Boschee's German Syrup. Meantime my cough grew worse and worse and then the -Grippe came along and 1 caught that also very severely. My condition then compelled me to do something. LI got two'bottlesof German §yrup. began using them, and before'taking much of the second bottle, I was entirely clear of the Cough that had hung to me so long, the Grippe, and all its bad effects. I felt tip-top and have felt that way ever since," PUTUR J. Biumis, Jr., Cayuga, Hines Co., Miss. Taking It Calmly. Buffalo News: Prisoner (in jail, looking at the sky through the bars of his What frightful weather 1 I think I won't go out to -day • FITS. -All Fite stopped free by Dr. Kline% Great Nerve Restorer. No Fits atter' Bret day's use. IVIarvelloul3 cures. Treatise an41101,00 trial bottle free to Fit cases, Send to Dr. Elle ine 931 Arch St., Philadelvh' Fa Her Royal Robe. Albany Times: Interested Auditor -And in what was the Queen of Madagascar clad Great Explorer -In -authority, chiefly. A Bible recently issued from the Oxford University press in only si n inches wide and cif an inch:. M thick- ness. , D. C. N. L. 3. 82 ARE NOT a Pur- gative Medi- cine. They are a BLOOD BUILDER. TONIC and BROOM.. STRUCTOR, RS they' supply in a condensed form the aubstances actually needed to en- rich the Blood, curing all diseases coming from Foos and W4er- RY BLOOD, Or from VITIATED HUMORS iii the BLOOD, end also nvigorate and Bunn the BLOOD and SYSTEM, when broken down by Overwork, nientaliworry,disease. exceased and indiscre- tions. They have a SPECIFIC ACTION 011 the SEXUAL SYSTEM Of both men and women,. restoring Loss, want and correcting ali IRREFFULANITIER. and SUPPRESSIONS. EVERY IIAN Who ultiesfV1 or fraeling,' or his physical powers flagging, should take thews 13min. They will restore his lost energies, both physical and mental. EVERY WriMAN should take them. They cure alt. stip- pressions and irregularities, which inevitably entail sickness when neglected. YOUNG MEN They will cure the re. should take these PMTS. sults of youthful bad habits, and strengthen tha systeln. YOUNG WOMEN These d 1=th:I make them regular. For sale by. all druggists, or will be sent nyeii receipt of price (50e. per box), by addressing THE DR. WILLIAMS' MED. CO. Brockviik. 0111 WEAK M EN I I will explain why -stomach medicine w' not mesa a Cr=i law ot nature. .An instra ment invented by a German doctor, the Alarm Wakes, worn at night, will stop emissions at once. Write me if you are in need of help. Ib has CURED ME after euffering many years Address P. FL LA' -S, Box 44, Onekama, Mich., .141,7NomenrfiraLim.. Scrap Mites, Vcaraea, Coaandrataa & Illasees• Silk Fringe, Cli= at, (answers qa Roney & Preaelli• 22.4. OLODE CARD CO.. Doi 77. Centatbraok. COM , tk.0. Maria Name Re...War, Ago,. OutRI, Roy tomato CONSUMPTION. rpnE GREAT PULMONARY REMEDY _L " Wistar's Pulmonic Syrup of Wild Cherry and Hoarhound." Consumption. than hydra headed monster that annually sweeps awayibs - tens of thousands of our blooming youths, may be prevented by the timely use of of this vain able medicine. Consumption and lung disease arise from coughs and colds neglected. Wistar's Pulmonic' Syrup is sold by drag gists at 25e. PENNYROYAL WAFERS. A specific monthly medicine for ladies to restore and regulate the monsen ,producing free'healthy and painless Ulm:Marge. No aches or pains on ap• preach. Now used by over 30,000 haat. Once usedwill use again. Invigorates these organs. Buy of your druggist; only those with our signature across face of labeL Avoid substitutes. Sealed particulars maned fic stamp. SLAtkpar box. Address, EUREKA OTIEMIOAL, COMPA.NY. DURUM AM Hot Air Heating Gurney's : Standard Furnaces Are 'Powerful, Durable, Economical. THOU,SANDIS IN USE,Jelviqg every (Add's° Von. ForValiny all the -leading dealers. Write for catal,igue and toll partieulsra The E. &. C. Gurney Om, HAMILTON, ONT, PISO'S CURE:FOR cm S W ER All LSE FAILS. ^ Eva cough Syrup. witates Good. tree in time. ,Said b dru sta. CONS•UMPT1 114 .44114,41.